#finn eberhardt

[bastardtrait]

I got the notification that Jakob was going to pass away soon. Mischa hopped a flight back to Germany to bid them farewell before he embarks on the immortal arc of his life.

transcript:

MISCHA: (whispering) Hey, guys...I'll be forty soon. Can...you believe it's been so long? You...you guys have two grandkids now...! From me, anyway. I dunno about Aleks. I don't know anything anymore. Our whole lives went by...twenty years...I'm safe, dads. I'm happy. I made a lot of mistakes but I'm still a loved man. The most grateful man alive.

MISCHA, aside: I've missed you so much...there've been so many times I could've used your advice. (sniff) Hell, you would've told me I was stupid for dropping all this money on a plane ticket back home that I'll use for ten minutes, max. That's... hah. Pretty silly of me.

MISCHA: I have to go again. But I'll always keep you with me. Always. (sigh) ... ...goodbye.

[bastardtrait]

well now that Danny's accidental legacy has come to an end I thought I'd compile all of his descendants' patented scowls together. I like how the eyes and nose have stayed the same for 4 generations, and even the mouth stuck around till Finn. geneticsTM.

[bastardtrait]

no little german boy, don't give your son the awkward sex rundown!

oh mein gott zis haus ist full of woohootalken

transcript:

FINN: Hey, mein Bärchen. Have you got a minute? MISCHA: Sure, papa, what's up? ...wait. Is this about me and-- FINN: So I know you and Alicia are dating now. It's my duty as your father to talk to you about the ins and outs... heh. Uh, anyway. The ins and outs.

MISCHA: Please stop. Please stop right now. Papa I am fully serious. FINN, aside: You know what a condom is, right? MISCHA: AAAAAAAAAGBGHHBBHGBHHHHH

[bastardtrait]

Mischa wanted more than anything to say goodbye to his fathers at the very least, before he disappeared forever. but he knew too much and he didn't want to have his memory erased. or like, die.

this life was lost to him. he knew that. he took in the sights of his childhood home for the last time.

transcript:

Lucky Residence

JAKOB/FINN: (snoring)

MISCHA: ... (sigh) Bye, baba. Bye, papa. I'll miss you. And I'll never forget you. Thanks for everything.

RUIYANG: Mischa, I hope you're certain about this. You can never come back home. MISCHA: I know that. And...neither can you. We're on the run. RUIYANG: Like two common fugitives? MISCHA: There's nothing common about us. Come on. Let's leave before I start crying.

[bastardtrait]

oh I'm SO SORRY for having never used the stupid dryer before, I didn't think the bitch was gonna come PRE-LINTED?!

this is the first of. many. many fires in this house.

[SFX: Fire alarm screeching] FINN: HOLY FUCKING SHIT PUT IT OUT PUT IT OUT!!!

FINN, from inside: (screaming) JAKOB: omg that's far too scary for me to deal with.

FIREFIGHTER: Are you ok sir? FINN: I'M FINE. I CANNOT SAY THE SAME FOR MY HUSBAND WHEN I FIND HIM.

[bastardtrait]

me: i wonder what Jakob and Finn are doing during this brain: idk probably pleading with police to look harder while sinking into further hopelessness me: ohhhh lmao

transcript:

JAKOB: ... FINN: ...still nothing. JAKOB: I know. FINN: Jakob...where is our son? Where is he? JAKOB: (sigh) I don't know, Finny.

MISCHA: (sigh) On the World of the Vampire. Chapter 1. Vampire anatomy.

ALEKSANDRA: ... (sigh)

MISCHA: (snoring awkwardly)

ALEKSANDRA: Where are you, Mischa? You said you'd be safe.

[bastardtrait]

The Lucky Legacy presents...

Journey 2 Disney World

there is no smooth or sensible way to incorporate Journey to Batuu into regular gameplay. so here's a legacy side story that chronicles me achieving the JTB goals for this generation.

this will be a purely vanilla run, no mods, for the unadulterated Journey to Butthole experience. the way EA meant for it to be. which I'm sure will be complete garbage. also I am going to disclaim here that I don’t know that much about Star Wars so if I interpret these canon characters incorrectly...please accept my apologies.

let's get this shit over with.

[bastardtrait]

if someone played an Ed Sheeran song just for me I'd assume that they fucking hate me honestly.

transcript:

JAKOB: This one's for you, babe. (playing Perfect by Ed Sheeran absolutely terribly)

[Cutaway: Finn rolling a want to 'express devotion to a beloved Sim'.]

FINN: Ohhhhhhhhh I'm gonna suck his dick.

MISCHA: I just want to eat my pizza you guys stop.