#fishermine

[fishermon]

Okay so like, there's the whole thing with Ghost hiding his face right? He doesn't really want people seeing his face, but I just had a thought. What if he invites Johnny to his place for a weekend? Maybe they're together in some way already, they've made out, they've fucked, they've cuddled, but Johnny still hasn't seen Simon's whole face. He's seen his chin, his jaw, his lips, and his eyes but that's about it. So when Simon invites him to his place for a weekend he's expecting that Simon will just wear his balaclava the whole time there too, and that's fine, he doesn't mind and he just wants Simon to be comfortable.

But then they start to actually plan it and Simon asks him something.

Simon doesn't wanna have to wear a mask the entire time Johnny's there, but he also still just isn't comfortable with Johnny seeing his face (whether that's because of some insecurity about scars or broken noses etc, or because of some other reason). So he asks if Johnny would wear a blindfold. Not the entire time, he'll need breaks so his eyes don't get all fucky, but for most of the time, and especially the time he's gonna be 'at risk' of seeing Simon's face.

Simon sets it up like it'd be something like an extended scene, a two day long scene where Johnny has to rely on Simon for almost everything. In return for his trust, he gets to touch Simon's face, to map it out with his fingers and try to memorise it so maybe, maybe, he'll be able to try and translate what he felt into a drawing later. Johnny of course agrees, and they spend a lot of time properly hashing it out, making sure Johnny will be able to take breaks, that Simon will keep a mask on him at all times in case Johnny needs a break, things like that.

They negotiate the whole thing properly. Simon will cook for and feed Johnny. He'll lead Johnny anywhere he needs or wants to go around the house. If Johnny needs to piss, Simon's coming with, holding his dick for him and helping him aim. Etc etc etc, with all the usual safety precautions and safewords in place, aftercare stuff easily accessible at and time of the day, anywhere in the house, both stuff that Simon can use, or stuff Johnny can, depending on the situation.

And they have a great weekend, Johnny spends as much time as he possibly can touching Simon's face, memorising it and trying to translate the shapes into something visual in his head straight away. He also gets fucked and it's amazing, because every touch is a little surprise. He can't see them coming, and every touch is so overwhelming that Simon's able to make him cum embarrassingly fast every time, especially when he sucks him off, because Johnny insists on getting his hands in his hair, and it's one of the first times he's ever been able to do that (the other first times are also from this weekend) and it feels so unbelievably intimate and special that Simon's trusting him not to take his blindfold off.

[fishermon]

What Roba deserves.

Art for chapter 32 of my WIP fic Watch out for False Prophets, an angsty, extreme slowburn Ghoap fic about Simon growing up in a cult run by Roba, and Soap being an outsider who he makes friends with and who helps nurture the seeds of doubt in Simon's mind about the cult.

Sadly Roba doesn't die for real until the very end of the fic, but hey, at least Simon gets to enjoy fantasizing about murdering him, right?

[fishermon]

Would people crucify me if I said I really love Graves/Soap as a ship?

Like, there's so much angst you could do with it. Graves cares so deeply about his shadows, and what if he and Johnny started dating, what if Johnny became an honorary shadow. He becomes one of Graves' boys and Graves genuinely loves him. Sure maybe the relationship started as a way to get intel, a way to ingratiate Graves with the 141, to get deeper in their ranks. But somewhere along the lines he genuinely falls in love.

Johnny was patient and kind and clever, and pushed when he needed to, when helping Graves unpack his internalised homophobia. Johnny was raised catholic but had very much unpacked the bad shit that had left him with. He still considered himself Catholic, but he didn't practice it the way most people did. His catholicism was a kind of folk catholicism. Graves was raised southern baptist and only thought he was past what being raised that way had taught him because he didn't go to church anymore.

He still shakes like an abused dog the first time Soap kisses him.

Soap doesn't mind, though, he gets it, he was the same way the first time he ever kissed another man. He knows how to comfort Graves, he knows how to help him wrap his head around it and he refuses to let Graves push himself too far too fast in an attempt to save face in front of Soap.

Because the differences in their ages gets to Graves a bit too. Johnny's young, he's happy, he's confident in himself and his relationships and sexuality, and Graves is just past 40, but somehow he is the one stumbling through and messing everything up like he's thirteen and just kissed a girl behind the chapel for the first time after skipping Sunday school. Graves hates feeling so out of his depth. It should be the other way round! He's the older one of the two of them, he should be the one who knows what he's doing, the one with experience guiding Johnny through it... But he isnt.

Johnny's already unpacked his religious trauma and guilt while Graves just let it sit and simmer.

Johnny never makes him feel stupid, though. He never judges the stupid questions Graves asks, never makes fun of him for trying something and having it just not work out the way he thought it would.

Johnny makes him feel well and truly loved and appreciated.

Graves almost forgets why they got into a relationship in the first place, until he gets the order that they're going to be moving forwards with the mission, setting the next phase in motion within the month.

It feels like the floor got ripped out from under him. Graves spends the first day after getting the news in shock as he realises what he's going to have to do, then he spends the second day trying desperately to figure out a way to get around this. A way to make sure Soap doesn't get hurt. A way to make sure Soap doesn't realise Graves has been silently betraying him and the 141 from the start.

A way to make sure he doesn't lose Soap in any sense of the word.

He knows it's not possible to keep the 141 from finding out, and it's not possible to make sure Soap doesn't get hurt unless he can get Soap to switch sides.

So he starts planting the seeds, trying to subtly influence Soaps feelings, his loyalties, so that when the time comes he can hold his hand out and ask Soap to come with him, and he will.

He gets to that time, though, he holds his hand out, and Soap refuses.

Graves' whole plan, the future he let himself think they could have together, falls apart right then and there, and he can't do anything but order his Shadow's to do what they'd already been briefed to do. He can't do anything but watch them hunt Soap down, hoping to the god that Soap had helped him believe in, the real god, the good and kind and just god who loved all of his children including the queer ones, that no one would catch Soap, that he'd get away.

[fishermon]

The Boy on the Other Side of the River.

Art for "Watch out for False Prophets" chapter 10, my WIP extreme slowburn, heavy angst ghoap fic. Simon is born into, grows up in, and eventually escapes from a cult run by Roba, and Soap is an Outsider who helps nurture the seeds of doubt in Simon's mind so he can realise escape is possible.

[fishermon]

Another piece of art I did for Watch out for False Prophets :]

This is a representation of a hallucination/vision/prophesy Simon experiences where he essentially sees his own death at the hands of a 'demon' trying to tear a bullet wound in his stomach open further.

WofFP is my extreme slowburn, heavy angst, ghoap fic about Simon growing up in and eventually escaping from a cult run by Roba. Soap is an Outsider and a 'demon' who helps nurture the seeds of doubt growing in Simon's mind.

When I set about making art for this fic, I gave myself the rule that every piece has to be drawn from the POV of a character in that scene, and it's really forced me to get better at drawing in perspective. I'm honestly really proud of the perspective in this piece :]

[fishermon]

Okie dokie this is the last piece of art in the fic (not the last one i have or probably will draw, though), it'll be in one of the last couple chapters whenever I write them, as long as I don't do anything stupid and add in a whole new plotline again 💀 (this drawing of Simon painted live by Johnny was meant to be where the fic ended at one point... And now it's in chapter 23 and I'm currently writing chapter 42 lol)

Simon goes to visit his families graves, and Johnny sits back quietly to give him space and to draw him

I'm so proud of how this piece turned out, honestly, it's my first piece for this fic with a full background, and its the best attempt at a watercolour style so far (it's a million times better than my first attempt, the colours on that one were SO unbelievably muddy it was awful, looked like me as a 12 year old painted it lol)

Close ups and details I really liked under the thingy :]

1. This scruffy little family portrait which I find ridiculously endearing, and then only makes me sadder because look how happy they were, look how well they were doing before they were murdered.

2. The fact that Joseph died when he was only two years old in this fic :( he was so small, he was still a baby.

3. The lavender Simon left in a vase by his mum's grave, because her favourite flower was Lavender, and she wore lavender deodorant, so that smell is one Simon finds comfort in.

4. Simon's dad's grave being completely untended to, because fuck that guy, even his gravestone can rot.

5. I just generally love this broken bit of fence.

6. This little alleyway behind it all with a big bin and one of those little side chimneys/steam vents.

7. I'm weirdly proud of this window and gutter too for some reason. The buildings all look so drab and that's exactly how I wanted them.

[fishermon]

Soap from my WIP fic "Watch out for False Prophets" where Simon grows up in a cult run by Roba and Soap is an Outsider and a 'demon' who helps him realise Outside doesn't want to murder him. His antennae wiggle a lot when he's anxious about something and I wanted to animate what I want it to look like. It's a safety mechanism, they're searching for scents that could indicate a threat.

He can also hide them away by flattening them down against his scalp, which is something he did for most of the time he and Simon knew each other, so he could hide them under the hood of a cloak.

[fishermon]

I can finally post some of the full art for the COD big bang!!! Art for chapter 1 of Elysium_River's AMAZING biological BDSM fic "Own My Body (Take My Soul)"

Chapter 1: Subdrop