Was contemplating on killing Jean again because it would be a little funny tbh but I don’t have much of an opinion on Allison other than she should’ve hate fucked Kevin at least once soooo
hi...buddy...baby....im....im sorry i keep killing you its ok its fine....
i would marry brody, i would sit on his shoulders, i would go to his concerts he'd help me plan my tattoos the height difference is magnificent. i gift him flowers and he takes them no questions asks, i propose to him and it takes him a moment to notice because i got down on one knee im so goddamn small it's fine. we have a small wedding. it's great. he takes me everywhere i am so happy.
me and malakai could get it on freak style, i wanna see god, i wanna have side effects like it's a horror movie and i just did it with the devil freak style, its gonna be great its gonna be so hot, i'd die afterwards i fear.
Fuck - Steve Rogers. Specifically Nomad Steve. His BDE and that beard? Yes. Ruin all my holes. I'm begging you, sir.
Marry - Bucky Barnes. I will happily help him adjust to life beyond being the Winter Soldier and be the partner he needs. And that metal hand around my throat? I'm pretty sure I can convince him to give that a try. And look at him? I want to give him a hug.
Kiss - Clark Kent. Country boy would be very sweet. I'm pretty sure Kal-El would break my pelvis.
I’m so excited for all of the unnatural travesties we’ll get from you tonight around the dumpster fire of shame!!! How about a Fuck Marry Kill, but with a blurb on each one of course, for Captain Blowhole, This is Sparta, and I’m Your Huckleberry!
Unleash the shame and crack!!!
@safarigirlsp YOUR MIND IS SO DEPRAVED AND IM ALWAYS LIVING FOR IT!😂
GET READY FOR THE WILDEST RIDE A YER LIFE DARLIN’!
FMK WITH THE CRACK AU’S: CAPTAIN BLOWHOLE, THIS IS SPARTA, AND OF COURSE.... HUCKLEBERRY
FUCK: CAPTAIN BLOWHOLE
Flip loved the sea and all its sea-crets (i hate myself) it held. Yes he grew very fond of you as well, keeping his cock nice and warm every night while you wailed on top of him. His balls never felt so light as his cum stayed nice and safe in your slick folds at all hours of the day. But if there was one thing he detested more than death, it was marriage.
He never felt like he was the committed type, leaving you to question all the progress you’d made on his salty heart. Finally settling with what this all really was in the end, a quick fuck and forget.
You hated the idea of being a pawn in his game, cursed him for it every time he entered your pussy, but the hate-fucking made it more exciting than anything in the entire ocean.
You soon grew to enjoy being his own personal pet of sorts, him using you as his personal cumbucket whenever he needed to relieve his frustrations.
Never once muttering the words commitment once you’d figured out his triggers. The one night you did resulted in a night spent in the barracks with the crew, grabbing at your clothing, shredding it to pieces as you cowered in the corner, kicking their grubby hands from your skin. The mutual relationship was enough to get you out of the stuffy town you’d grown up in, full of drunks and homeless buccaneers, taking even more advantage of your beauty than Flip had already.
At least he was handsome, and well-endowed in just about every department you could think of. You craved the adventure, the smell of the salt in the sea, the wind in your pretty locks as you trekked the world with the Jolly Roger.
Getting fucked into oblivion every single night, eating gourmet dinners, being gifted with all the treasures of the Seven Seas, even participating in a battle or two amongst the rivaling pirate ships. It was perfect. Being his personal pocket pussy was just enough to keep you satisfied.
MARRY: THIS IS SPARTA
The wedding would be short and sweet. The entire village present as the nuptials of the two most beautiful people in the community were to be finally joined with the Gods blessing their union.
You were draped in the finest silks your family could provide, the white illuminating your skin in a halo of glitter as you walked down the path to the steps of the temple. The grin plastered on your warrior rivaling Zeus himself as he watched you glide down the aisle, carrying a bouquet of wildflowers in your delicate fingers.
You hid your face under a sheer veil, a small crown adorning your head as he was clad in his full army gear, including the Spartan helmet which covered his precious nose from your view.
He and you were only able to remove the garb when the officiant blessed the marriage. You traipsed up the stairs, grabbing the majority of your silks in your free hand as you came to his place on the marbled floor.
He held a large hand to which you took, both of you gazing into one another’s eyes as you waited for the end of the ceremony.
“Phillip,” the senator pronounced, “will you uphold the will of the Gods to complete the duty to your country, as well as your commitments to this woman you’ve chosen to be yours?”
Flip turned his head from the minister, to gaze into your precious eyes, smiling before he answers slightly above a whisper, “I do,” a chorus of javelins hitting the ground as the warriors in his guild were present in their full gear to witness their leader wed.
“Y/N,” the senator turned to your direction, “will you uphold the will of the Gods to complete the duties to your country, as well as your commitments to this warrior you have been blessed with to be your betrothed?” turning your neck back to face him as his amber eyes swirled in your brain.
“I do,” hitching a breath as you released the anxiety that had built up throughout the day of getting prepared for him.
“Then it is the will of Zeus and Hera to bless this sacred union in holy matrimony,” he pronounced to the crowd of hundreds gathered, “you may seal your duties with a kiss,” gesturing for the removal of your coverings.
He let go to remove the golden helmet, his ravened hair falling over his face in curls as he fixed himself enough to remove your veil. Your beauty shimmering in the light of day like a beacon, the smile on your face rivaling Aphrodite’s gorgeous stare.
He pulled you to him, gripping the back of your head to tilt it to his face, embracing your lips in a searing kiss. The movements only increasing as the crowd signaled their agreements with the union, cheering and stomping their feet while throwing flower petals into the air in celebration.
Yes the wedding would be short, but the reception would last days. The people dancing in the streets over your love. Women weeping as they watched their only chance with Flip fade away as you both gazed into each other, laughing and enjoying each other’s company.
“I love you my muse,” he whispered by the lit bonfire surrounded by dancers, celebrating your marriage.
“I love you too my strong warrior,” running a finger along his jaw as he leaned in to give you another kiss, your tongues laving over each other as you both fell into each other’s embrace.
KILL: IM YOUR HUCKLEBERRY
“Phil!” you screamed, tied to the bed of the truck in a spread eagle pattern, naked as a jay-bird in the cool night.
“Fuck! Phillip! I’m gonna kill you!” crying out as your empty pussy puckered from the breeze that blew over the Colorado Springs plains.
You heard a deep chuckle roll from the side of the truck, the flick of his bic lighting a cigarette that he blew smoke out from your peripheral, “aw darlin’, don’t promise somethin’ ya can’t keep,” a grunt leaving his lips as he lifted a spurred boot on his tailgate, the motion causing the entire bed to shake.
“I said what I said,” spitting a wad to smack on the leather of the shoe as you shivered in the cold, “there ain’t nothin’ you can do about it, cowboy,” arching an eyebrow at the smirk that landed across his face again.
“Oh, sugar,” he cooed, lifting his entire weight on his tailgate, pulling the knots on your ankles to make sure they still held up from your writhing, “there’s a million things I could do about it,” pressing a spur to dig into the flesh of your thigh, the metal causing you to wail out in pain as it drew the slightest bit of blood.
“Just fuck me already you son of a bitch!” gritting your teeth to sand as he dug further into your perfect skin.
“Hold the fuck on,” he growled out, sucking the last of his filter as he lowered to your mound, watching your hole open and close from the bite of the air, “last time I checked, brats like you don’t get anything they want,” running his free hand over your slicked up folds, a hiss leaving your mouth as you felt his gritty fingers touch your pretty pussy.
“You’re such a goddamn slut,” snarling as he lowered the burning end of his cigarette on your other thigh, ashing it on your delicate epidermis.
“Motherfucker!” the pain unbearable as he pushed the ashes into the welt, “Flip! Goddamnit!” a gush of slick dripping down to your asshole as you cursed his name into the night.
“I know ya like the pain, whore!” spitting into your open mouth as he grabbed the trail of wetness and rimmed your puckered butthole with his thumb.
“I’m gonna,” you winced out, moaning as he pushed his digit into your ass, “I-I,” losing yourself in the feeling of his other fingers filling your gaping cunt, coaxing them to close in on them like a finger trap.
“You’re gonna what, sugar?” taunting as he watched your head roll back in pleasure, “you’re gonna kill me?” he chuckled again, watching you unravel on his fingers.
“I don’t think you’re gonna do anything, baby doll,” feeling your walls close in on him as he brushed your G-spot, “in fact, I think you’re gonna cum all over my hand... like the fuckin’ slut you are,” cooing with his Cameled breath as he watched you come closer and closer to bliss.
“You’re gonna cum,” he demanded, “and you’re gonna do it right now, Y/N,” growling out as he ran his free thumb over your aching clit, sending you into a frenzy of euphoria, the pressure built up so much from all of this causing you to release your spend in a stream that coated the entirety of his large hand.
Yes, you were gonna kill him, but not until after he made you cum a few more times tonight.
HO-MY-GOD IM EXHAUSTED FROM THIS BUT I LOVE ALL OF IT WITH ALL MY HEART. THESE AU’S KILL ME IN THE BEST WAY!
This one’s tough :’D I like all three, but I’d say Fuck Ethan (In every ways, I have a love/hate feeling about him lmao), Marry Vladimir and Kill Beliath
