#foreverinthedepthsofhell

[thememoiristslosttrain]

The sun is rising and I know you’re with me. We’re under the same sky but the sun will never set eternally on you or me

So watch this sun rising with me. It’s the first and the first of many.

[thememoiristslosttrain]

Cat and Mouse

I met the devil in a dream. He was sitting at the pillar right across from me.

He looked no different. Two hands, two legs, two feet. No horns or tail; he looked just like everyone else walking down the busy street.

His eyes, like silk, glided over with such ease but no one noticed what he didn’t want them to see.

Scanning the horde his eyes swept over them, from left to right, for what seemed like an eternity.

Fierce - a vision he painted, sitting by the pillar - legs swinging lazily as he decided the fate of the unfettered.

An aura of crimson brilliance poured through from him as those walking so busily, we’re slowly pulled into the gray.

He smiled and giggled as the crowd thinned. So proud, he broke into a funny dance like a little child on Christmas Day.

His gaze swept past me a couple of times. Just another cog in the wheel that filled the sea.

I smiled each time hoping he’d see that I knew what he was up to as I watched him from across the street.

Another few, with the click of his tongue, disappeared as they turned into alleys away from the sun.

I smiled again as his eyes ran past me but this time he noticed and doubled back to look at right at me.

Baffled, he stared. Confusion, stealing his smile. I had his attention but he seemed truly surprised.

He jumped from the ledge and slipped, unseen, now a part of the crowd. Searching wildly, as I turned down the curb and waited to be found.

The devil seemed stunned as he caught up to me but I waved and with a smile pulled him down to the depths he sent all others before me.

-

A (via @thememoiristslosttrain )

[thememoiristslosttrain]

1. Firsts (364 letters to go)

To firsts that bring terror and strike fear within you

To ones you glance at with jealousy that leave an ominous hue

To those you glare at in disgust as they smile viciously at you.

To the ones you never consider because they’re worth nothing to you

To the sad kind of firsts that leave you glum and blue

To the firsts that leave you ferociously red and a little sick too

You do not control me; I do.

I’m going to reclaim those firsts; they’re mine to play with as I choose

-

A (via @thememoiristslosttrain )

[thememoiristslosttrain]

Dandelions sold to the sea

My words are like dandelions scattered from fields; running into empty barren streets.

They flirt with cracks in the pavement and settle in crevices; in places no man’s eye would ever meet.

There they lay, bruised but not wilted hoping you’ll turn; notice them someday - these tiny insignificant beings.

For years they wait only to be met by other poor seeds that have drifted in the hope of being seen; unaware of the impending neglect they will languish in eternally.

In time they become embittered and cold. No longer ablaze with warmth and hope. No longer waiting to be remembered and heard.

As new ones join their ranks, optimistic creatures of soon to be forgotten fractures; the wise ones, now wilted, leave on the walls their last words.

A final attempt to be seen before their fatigued flames are finally at peace.

A question - Why don’t you hear me? Why won’t you try to see? I’m right here before you. Why are you blind to me?

And so they’re blown away, scattered, in the sea that all words go to die in when you forget that all they want is to be heard and believed.

- A

[thememoiristslosttrain]

Burning out

There’s a place where love goes to die and I see this one packing its bags.

It starts small, you don’t say goodnight and then you don’t show up.

Slowly, you don’t reply and I’m typing a little story of my heart breaking to a home that no longer exists.

I’ve seen it a million times but I haven’t learnt my lesson. Maybe you’ll be the one to cure me of my stupidity. Cure me of the ability to believe it won’t end like it always does.

So I never have to spend another night silently screaming into my pillow and violently caressing the wall with my head.

Holding back the sobs that threaten to leave every time I think of how small you make me feel.

There’s a stark contrast that makes me wonder how I missed the imaginary signs.

There’s a place that love goes to die and this journey has been the furthest I’ve ever travelled.

It’s hard to not lose faith even though all I want it is to never let it go.

But

You don’t see things slipping away because you never have. I, however, have had the pleasure of having it snatched from me before. One I hope you never ever feel.

You will In truth be my forever for I no longer have the strength to believe in someone else.

I gave you what little I had left. Everything else has been laid to waste by the world before you.

There’s a place that love goes to die and I hope you never feel the cold from that light burning out.

[thememoiristslosttrain]

The more I write the lighter my chest feels. The more I write the lesser I feel.

Yours truly

[thememoiristslosttrain]

It’s that time again. One it hasn’t been for so long. Time for me to build an unbreakable shell and shut the world out.

Yours

[thememoiristslosttrain]

I’ve lost something. Feels like it’s you but it might just be me.

Yours truly