Think Of Me When You See The Fireworks - Fred Weasley x Reader
Summary: You’ve been with Fred since third year. Kind of like Ron and Hermione, you were best friends since first year and didn’t tell each other how you felt. You kept it to yourself and it caused so many rows and fights with each other. You just wanted each other so much, but were worried you’d ruin a friendship if the other didn’t love you in return.
**Flash forward to the Battle of Hogwarts, end of seventh year for you & the twins, Ron, Harry & Hermione end of their sixth**
The war had taken so much from you… you just want it to end. Before it takes more. You wouldn’t be able to handle it.
Warnings: death, talk of suicide, talk of sex
[[I will update this with a part 2 when I can! The part 2 being Fred’s pov]]
•
•
•
So many people have died. So many that the war took from you. The war did not discriminate between those that deserved it and they those who truly were in the wrong place at the wrong time.
You, your entire school and family (the Weasley’s, Harry, and Hermione) have been fighting this war for hours, almost days. You were so ready for it to be over, but it didn’t seem that that was going to happen anytime soon. You were walking around on egg shells hoping not to come up on anyone else dead. You don’t think you could handle it anymore.
You were with Luna, running around stupefying death eaters and honestly, killing anyone that got in your way. You were once such a quiet soul who could never imagine speaking unforgivable curses and actually seeking to kill, but this was war. You just walked upon Greyback doing unimaginable things to Lavender and you just shouted the first thing that came to mind.
“Avada Kedavra!!!”
Greyback looked at you in shock for a spilt second before he was blasted out of a window and landed on the grounds outside. You walked over to the window and looked down and took a deep breathe in…
“I… I killed him”
Your heart was pounding. You could not believe how far everything had come since that first day first year.
You’d never hurt a fly and now you just shouted an unforgivable curse without thinking. You were a lot like Hermione… good girl, good grades, stayed out of trouble and lived in the library. You couldn’t believe what you just did.
You were someone who struggled so much with anxiety and depression. You come from a muggle born family, who did not enjoy having a freak for a daughter and you had it hard at school. Hogwarts was your safe place, but it was still ridden with those who did not believe you to be worthy of magic. You were told everyday that you deserved death. You even tried to end your life one night… Nobody knew how badly you struggled with your mental health. You had no one to talk to. Hermione knew the struggles along with you of being muggle born, but you were scared to talk to anyone. You didn’t want anyone to try and stop when you decided you had enough and just wanted to leave this earth. It was when Fred walked up to you at the astronomy tower that night at the end of fourth year that he realized how bad it was.
•
•
•
“Y/N… what are you doing?” Fred slowly walked up to you, you standing near the railing. “Ron & Ginny told me you stormed out of the Great Hall saying you couldn’t handle it anymore… Draco said something to you and you looked really sad and ran off… what’s going on? What did he say?”
You couldn’t look at him. You knew you would lose it and fall into his arms. You couldn’t do that. You needed to go right now.. you just needed to end it all. You couldn’t handle the voices in your head telling you that you were not worthy. Telling you that you were not as gorgeous as all the other girls. Telling you that you were a filthy little mudblood. Uh.. Draco Malfoy. He took every chance he had to remind you how you’re dirty blood and weren’t worthy of life. Before running off to the astronomy tower, Draco had brought the Weasley’s into it, talking about how they were traitor blood and deserved the same fate as you. You just couldn’t put them through this anymore. You just needed to leave and they wouldn’t be surrounded by you anymore. They wouldn’t be on the receiving end of Draco’s fury. Fred walked right up beside you. You hadn’t even realized he had gotten so close it scared you and almost made you fall.
“Y/N! No!!” Fred grabbed your arm and yanked you down into his arms, both of you falling onto the ground, the sobs just coming so roughly out your fragile body.
“Let me go, Fred!!! I don’t want to be here anymore. Okay?! I’m just a filthy disgusting mudblood who is undeserving of anything good. Your family does not deserve someone like me filthying up their life. I don’t belong here. I don’t belong with you. You deserve someone who can be better for you. A pure blood who is seen as everything worthy and can give you a pure blood family. I am not good enough or pretty enough for you. Okay? Just go away. Please. I can’t do this with you standing here” You broke out of his arms and ran back to the railing. Just jump. You told yourself. Why couldn’t you do it? You felt like you were being pulled the other direction. You didn’t understand why this was so hard.
You heard Fred take a deep breathe in.
“Y/N… you… you are my family... our family. You are everything I could ever imagine. You are so beautiful and so smart… yeah, you are a muggle born and you want to know why people hate that? Because you might be the smartest witch ever.. even before Hermione ;) and nobody wants to give that placement to a muggle born. They want their pure blood status to be what makes them great, but baby, that’s not what makes you great. Your family and blood… what makes you great is you… how you care for others and how amazing you are. You joined into a world that refuses to accept how great you are and you just continued to show the world that nothing can break you. Okay? Don’t let this break you. Don’t let a git like Malfoy bring you down because I know you are going to shine so bright one day and be the greatest witch of our generation. Let’s show them, okay?”
You felt yourself relax and felt Fred pull you down off the railing. You still didn’t believe what he said, but you believe he meant it. You believe he truly saw you that way. You finally looked at him and could see tears falling from his blood shot eyes and your heart shattered. You hadn’t even realized when he was talking how scared and devastated he was. You did this to him.. You hated yourself for how much pain you brought upon him. As long as he lives, I will breathe for him. I will spend my days loving him. That’s what I’m made for. You thought. You took his hands and rested your head on his chest as the sobs ran its course through your weak and tired body.
“Let’s go lay down for a bit, okay?” He took you to Madam Pomfrey who gave you a sleeping potion for a good nights rest. You slept for 12 hours and Fred stayed with you the whole time.
•
•
•
You felt Luna’s hand embrace upon your shoulder and give it a squeeze.
“Y/N, you saved Lavender’s life. It’s okay… He deserved it. Even Azkaban would have been too kind for him”
You look down and Lavender is barely breathing. She was screaming for help for who knows how long. She was about to pass out. You quickly shook your head of all thoughts, grabbed Lavender with Luna and ran down to the Great Hall to find her some help.
You burst through the door, find Madam Pomfrey and gently lay Lavender down on the nearest cot. “Greyback… He… he was torturing her and…” you shook your head from the dark moment before you blasted him off and what he was doing. “Please help her… save her” Madam Pomfrey attended to Lavender immediately.
You take a look around at all the bodies and people fighting for life. You’re scanning the room to find a tall red head and your eyes finally land upon him. For the first time all night you see him. Breathing.
Fred… He’s okay…
For the first time all night you smile. He sees you, too and you both smile from across the hall at each other.
You were about to take a breathe and run to him when you see the wall blast from beside him. Your heart drops when Fred gets knocked down and crushed by the wall.
“Fred!!!!!”
The Weasley’s and you go running towards the blast. You felt like everything was moving in slow motion. You were pushing running people out of the way, you could see shoots of light from death eaters wands come out of the blasted hole, you were ducking left and right. You were just trying so hard to get to Fred. Before it was too late. You shot your wand at the wall debris and lifted it off of Fred and dropped down to him.
“Fred!! I’m here… please be alive… Fred!!”
You could see he was breathing, but it was very shallow. You just wanted to hold him. You wanted to take him and disapparate somewhere else. Somewhere far away, where there was no one else there, just you and him. You just wanted him for the rest of your life. You run your fingers across his face and feel him twitch under your touch. He hasn’t even looked at you yet you can tell he knows it’s you.
“Y/N? Love…”
His breathing could not be any worse. He was likely going to pass out soon. You didn’t think. You just did. You bent down, grabbed his face between your hands and kissed him. You kissed him like your life depended on it. His life depended on it. You were breathing life into him, hoping it would simply be enough to help. That you would be able to save him.
His stomach was severely bruised. He had a huge lac on his head. He had deep cuts all throughout his body. Blood was everywhere. You couldn’t tell exactly where it started and ended.
“Fred… I love you… please be okay…”
You were trying to find a spot to touch him that wasn’t covered in blood, debris, or wand marks. You were scared to touch him or he’d break.
He placed his weak, bloody hand on your face and you felt yourself relax into his touch.
“Y/N, I-I was gonna ask you to marry me…” Your heart skipped a bit and your breathing skipped. He’s stumbling on words, breathing shallow and barely at a whisper, but everyone and thing was so quiet you could hear him clear as day. All you could hear were the sniffles of those around you. “I just blasted this dude into oblivion and immediately thought of running to you. I was on such a high. I knew at that moment that when we got out of here, I was gonna get down on one knee, right in the middle of all this chaos and propose to you… I wasn’t going to waste another minute because watching you walk down the aisle in the arms of my father in what I can imagine is the world’s most beautiful dress with an even more beautiful bride was my dream.”
“Is your dream, Fred” You said with tears and a loud sob. “Is. You’re still here. You’re not going anywhere. Alright? Madam Pomfrey will be right over as soon as she’s done with Lavender.. I can probably do some mag-“
Fred cut you off, held your face in one hand and used the other to hold your hands, making you drop the bag you were trying to recover your wand from.
“Sweetheart, I love you. So much. You… you were the perfect edition to my life. You brought me out of so much and made me feel like I had a reason to be alive. Love, I don’t want you to be sad. Okay? I know you’re going to be, but don’t let it consume you. Take care of yourself, okay. You have to promise me. You’re not gonna deny a dying man his wish are you?” He starts laughing and immediately coughing up blood. Your heart drops and you can feel everyone drop down with you, helping Fred sit up.
“Madam Pomfrey!! PLEASE HELP!! Molly! Arthur! George!!!!! ANYONE! Do something! Please go grab Madam Pomfrey! I can not lose him! I won’t!” Everyone just stared, wide eyed and tear stained. You were shaking uncontrollably.
The sweet momma Weasley, with tears pouring out of her eyes due to the sight of her near dead son and what she considered to be her daughter with so much fear in her eyes, took your face into her hands and gave you a kiss on the forehead. “Y/N, sweetie… focus on him… I don’t think he has much time. There’s only so much magic that can reverse this kind of damage.” Molly takes a huge breathe in and wipes her tears away. She had witnessed first hand the spells thrown at her son, the deep wounds and knew there was only so much he could endure before it became permanent and out of her hands. She nearly was going to pass out from her words. You could see the other Weasley boys run to her aid when she fell into Arthur.
You just stared at her in disbelief, trying so hard to breathe. You slowly turned to Fred and it hit you… You were losing him. It was like all of your memories came flooding in at once. Seeing Fred for the first time first year, “hi… I’m Fred Weasley… Hi… I’m Y/N L/N”, Summers at the Burrow and sneaking off to snog, that one Christmas holiday you spent with the Weasley siblings at Hogwarts so you could stay with Hermione who didn’t wanna leave, the snowball fight George started in the hall that led to your first kiss with Fred which resulted in everyone cheering and throwing snowballs at you out of excitement “Bloody hell!! Took ya long enough!!” They all shouted and your favorite memory of all… the first time you made love. It was at the flat George and Fred bought at the end of sixth year.
You were both so nervous… you had talked about coming together as one, but having it be your first time for anything other than hand stuff and kissing, you were scared. You didn’t know what it would be like. Suffice to say, it was bloody amazing. You closed your eyes and held his almost lifeless hands as you replayed that moment from beginning to end over and over. You felt Fred breathe ever so lightly, bringing you out of your thoughts and into present time.
“What’re you thinking about, Y?N? What’s got you smiling, love?”
“You.. ou… our first time together”
Fred let’s out a huge sigh, closes his eyes and smiles.
“That was bloody brilliant, wasn’t it?”
Your face turned red and looked around. Everyone kind of dispersed so you could have some privacy. You looked back at Fred and bent down so you were now laying down beside him, your head laying on his bleeding shoulder. He winced a little at contact, but he didn’t care. He knew this was the last time he would be holding you.
“Fred, please don’t go.. Let me perform some magic on you.. it might help. I might could get the blood to stop long enough to wait for Madam Pom-“ Fred places a finger on your mouth and quietly shushes you.
“Baby… there are so many people here who need help. I want her to help them first and if she gets to me in time and there is something she can do, okay.. but look at me and promise me something… promise me this won’t break you. Promise me you won’t do anything crazy… promise me…. You’ll live. My mom and dad are your mom and dad… you are their child. They can not lose you, too…” Your chest stiffened and knew that Fred was scared your mental health would cause you to go into a psychotic break. You saw the fear in his eyes and immediately were brought back to the astronomy tower.
“I can not promise that.. I-I’m sorry. I just… a life without you? It makes no sense. A life without your jokes, laughs and love? I don’t want it. Absolutely not. I… I wanna go with you… I can just lay here with you and go with you because I promise you as soon as your heart stops, so does mine”
“Y/N… please…” He now had a serious, worrisome look, tears falling down fast. There goes that pain you’re causing him again. He didn’t have much more time. “Please… live for me. I might not be here physically anymore, but you will see me everyday. All around you, you will see me, you will hear me, you will always have me.. I will send you a reminder everyday of how much I love you… I promise” He stiffened up and you shot him a worried look. “Molly!! Arthur!!” Everyone came running over and gathered around Fred.
“I love you, Y/N….” He looked around his family and everyone around him. “I love you all… so much.. I… I-I… want you all to think of me when you see the fireworks, okay?” Everyone was a bit confused, but just shook their heads. You noticed George nodding at him and Fred winking. You had no idea what they were silently speaking about, but just like George and Fred… to have a grand plan for how this was going to go down. You couldn’t think about happy thoughts right now… you just ran your hand through his hair, kissing his forehead.
“I love you, Fred… so much… I promise… I promise that I’ll try… I can’t promise I’ll succeed, but I’ll try.”
“You’ll succeed... I know you can do it… you’ll see… you’ll… you’ll be okay…” He coughed up more blood and laid back down. “I love you… my… little muggle” His eyes immediately glossed over and you threw yourself onto his lifeless body.
“No!!! Fred!!! I wasn’t ready yet! Please!!!! Come back!!!! Wake him up please… this is just a joke, right? You and George are planning all this. I won’t be mad… just wake up… I can’t…” You looked down at him and he wasn’t breathing. His chest stopped rising with his heart… and you felt yourself fall over onto him and everything went dark. Your heart stopped the second his did.
•
•
•
You woke up in the hospital bed of Hogwarts. You felt so much dryness on your throat and tried to cough when you immediately felt a hand come up to face, bringing some water to your lips. Fred… it was just a dream… but it was actually George. He could tell what your thoughts were and immediately felt pain for you. He looks just like him you thought.
You used to think there was so many differences between the two, but it’s like he got all of Fred’s looks now that he was gone.
“Y/N... I’m so sorry… I… I hate being this reminder to you… reminder of the greatest love of your life who’s gone. I understand if… if you want me to leave and distance myself… I just… you’re still my best friend, okay? I’ll respect whatever you decide, but I love you.. okay?”
You felt yourself sob uncontrollably as you took George’s hand. “It’s okay… I love you, too… yes, you remind me of him, but it’s good, okay? You will carry him on for the rest of us. Let’s promise each other not to let this break us okay… Fred may be gone, but… I can still feel him, y’know? I somehow still feel him all around, in me, in my heart, my mind…” You noticed George sobbing and smiling. You sit up and bring your hand to his face. “I know, George… you’ve lost your best friend, too…” you notice the way he looks at you. Confusion stretched across your face. “What’s going on, George? What’s on your mind?”
“You’re right Y/N… You can feel him and he is still here… and this is why” George was taking out a piece of paper from his pocket and handed it to you. You didn’t know what it was at first, until you did. Your heart stopped and you felt yourself being pulled back down. You felt yourself immediately get grounded. An ultrasound… I… I’m… “Pregnant?” George sobbed through a chuckle and you could hear more sobs coming from behind the curtain. Molly, Arthur, the rest of the Weasley kids including Percy, Harry and Hermione were coming to stand beside you. Hermione took your hand into hers “Yes.. You are” she smiled so big “When you passed out, we brought you up here and Madam Pomfrey had one of the health doctors come into just to give you an exam before trying to wake you and they did an ultrasound to check for bleeding and well… they heard a heartbeat. Two actually.” Your heart stopped. “Two?!!” “You’re having twins, Y/N” George said with the biggest smile on his face.
You felt yourself slowly lay back down on the hospital bed. You felt yourself smiling and feeling so full of life… until you realized Fred wasn’t here to celebrate with you. Your mind immediately went back to the night that just had to be the moment you got pregnant.
•
•
•
“Bloody hell… Y/N… that was amazing”
Fred rolled off the top of you and pulled you close into his arms, cuddling with you after having his mind blown. You felt a shift and looked up at him.
“We didn’t do a contraceptive spell, did we?” “No… and you know what? That’s okay.. I mean… if I get pregnant, that wouldn’t be so bad, right? I mean I know we’re young, going into our 7th year.. but…” Fred stopped you with a kiss. “I would honestly love that, Y/N… let’s just… be together… not worry about it and just be happy no matter what, okay? Sound good?” “Sounds perfect”
•
•
•
You broke into a sob which resulted in everyone leaning into you, all hugging. Molly broke the silence a few moments later.
“Y/n… dear… you are going to stay with us, okay? Since you’re of age, Madam Pomfrey has not contacted your parents and I told her you might not want her to… since…” You both had a silent talk with a nod of agreement. Your parents disowned you when you started displaying signs of freaky magic. It was when Hagrid came to pick you up to go to Hogwarts express that you met Molly who immediately brought you into her family. You’ve basically lived their every summer for a few weeks, but also ended up going back to your parents because you weren’t of age. You had to. “Thank you… Molly… Arthur… I honestly don’t think I’d get through any of this without a family…” Fred’s family… It was so bittersweet. You missed Fred terribly and you always will, but your heart soured with the sight of this amazing family who already seen you as a Weasley.
“Please… call us mom and dad, okay? You are our child. You and Fred were good as married from the moment you became one.” Molly gave a big smile and your face became red with a chuckle. George, Ron, Harry and Hermione all laughed. “I can’t believe you’re carrying my first grandchildren” She gave a huge grin and kissed your forehead. “Alright alright let’s give her some space and rest, okay?” Madam Pomfrey came barging in with some sleeping potion and tea. “Carrying a baby is hard work… carrying twins? On top of your exhaustion from the war? You need your rest!! Let’s go. All of you” Everyone started walking out, but you grabbed George’s hand and he shot his eyes back to yours. “I want you to stay… please”
George gave a small smile and sat back down. You drank the potion and tea slowly drifting off to sleep as George held your hand and looked up to the sky, “I’ll take care of our girl, Fred.. you can guarantee it” You let out a small chuckle and smile as you drifted off to sleep
•
•
•
**4 months later**
You went home to the burrow a few days after the war happened and you found out you were pregnant with not just one, but two babies. Your heart was still souring. Molly had let you stay in Fred’s room, George back at the flat and everyone else in their respective rooms. Ron and Hermione had gotten engaged and were making their wedding and moving out plans. Harry and Ginny started dating and Harry had mentioned to Arthur about proposing one day soon. Bill & Fleur just got back from a honeymoon trip they never got to take due to the war.
Everything seemed to be going so great. It was moments of greatness though that darkness peeked over you. Fred wasn’t here. He didn’t get to celebrate and enjoy all of the life happening right now. You felt guilty smiling and laughing when Fred didn’t get to. It was almost like Hermione could read your thoughts as you sat at the kitchen table, drinking some tea.
“He’s so proud of you, y’know? Wherever he is.. he sees you and he’s proud of you. He’s proud of you for being here and growing his babies.” She gave you a warm smile and continued talking, “Are you excited about finding out the genders today?! Molly is running around like crazy getting everything prepared and George is, too” She gave you a puzzled look. “I have no idea what he’s planning, but he’s so excited.” You gave her a chuckle and a smile, “who knows… but yes I am very excited. I just wish he could be here… but I keep reminding myself that he is. He’s in the air, he’s in George, he’s in mom and dad, he’s in this house. I still hear his laugh every night when I am going to sleep. I still feel his hands tickling me as he’s trying to make me laugh. He’s here. Not in the way I would have dreamed of, but it’s still so perfect.” You look down at your tiny growing bump and run a hand across it smiling, “and he’s here” Hermione chuckled and sob, “okay!! Enough emotions. Let’s get outside. They are about to start! We’re just waiting on you, love”
As you step outside in the yard in front of the burrow you can’t help, but smile. Everyone has put so much work into making this so special. Molly is waiting across the lawn for you to come and get ready for the reveal. George is literally bouncing up and down ready to start and everyone is gathering together behind you.
“Are you ready, Y/N?!” George shouts from the other side of the lawn staring at you and the group of people around you. Molly, Ginny, Hermione and Fleur all had a hand on your stomach, smiling and giggling as the babies wiggled around ever so lightly. Ron and Harry had a hand on your shoulder. Arthur and Molly holding each other right beside you. George puts on a huge smile and begins counting down… “alright, Y/N and Fred…” you begin sobbing at the mention of your missing tall red head lover. “3… 2… 1…” and just like magic, blue and pink fireworks go shooting into the sky and the words “boy and girl” in their respective colors are magnified right in front of you. You feel all the hands previously on you release and begin clapping, screaming, and hugging you.
“A boy AND a girl?!” Tears go falling down your face as you hear a voice of someone you haven’t heard in a very long time. “Think of me when you see the fireworks” you looked around and realized that George had played a memory back of Fred’s voice the day he died. ”I… want you all to think of me when you see the fireworks, okay?”
Your sobs became uncontrollable and Ron had to grab onto you as you fell to the ground. You were filled with so much joy and grief. Fred should be here. He should know. George ran up to you and got down on your level and pulled your face up to make eye contact with him.
“Y/N… Fred knew. I mean, he didn’t know for sure, but a part of him, when he looked at you knew. The night you two… y’know…” George winked and made a clicking noise indicating sex and everyone laughed and Molly winced, “okay!!”
George just laughed and continued. “He could just feel that you were and he didn’t wanna say anything until it was something you figured out and could tell him yourself. He didn’t want to ruin the surprise you would have had for him, but he told me. He was so excited and just knew that you were. Our twin powers, y’know, but the day he… died, we had a mental conversation that he wanted me to do fireworks so that you will be reminded of him and to tell you how proud of you he is and how happy he is that you are bringing forth some amazing kids into this world. You’re going to do great… you have all of us.”
Everyone around, sobbing and laughing, huddled together on the ground, hugging you. You could breathe again. For the first time in 4 1/2 months, you could breathe again.
**2 years later**
Fred was right….
“I might not be here physically anymore, but you will see me everyday. All around you, you will see me, you will hear me, you will always have me.. I will send you a reminder everyday of how much I love you… I promise”
He is here. He is laughing through our children. He is crying through our hard times. He is nurturing us through our heartbreak. He is helping you raise your kids. Your family truly stepped up and provided you with so much love and support, but you know Fred was right here with you as well. He’s among all of you… Every night since the gender reveal, George lights up fireworks for everyone and you know he’s there, too… lighting up the entire world. Reminding us of him through the fireworks.
** I truly hope you loved this!!! It’s my first fic and I have had this idea after reading so many other fics and then making an edit that I did for TikTok and it just came to me!! I’d love any feedback ♥️**
