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he's the big spoon, for obvious reasons
you sleep in a position so that your head rests on his chest and your body curls into his
his arms are always around you
fred can't sleep well without you, you have to be close to him or he'll worry
you've always got a big heap of blankets and quilts on you like a burrito because he doesn't want you to catch a cold
sometimes he'll stay up just watching you sleep
he'll admire the way you look so adorable with the ever-so rare peaceful expression on your face
"freddie?"
"yes, love?"
"go to sleep."
"i will. you just look so beautiful."
he loves it when you're drowsy, because if you're outside, you'll practically depend on him to move and he loves taking care of you
if you're inside you'll ask for the usual cuddles and how can he not say yes to those eyes?
many a time you'll play with his hair, and he'll try so hard not to fall asleep, but he'll just whisper 'i love you' in a sleepy voice and doze off
he looks as pretty as he always does. his eyelashes are as long as you wish yours were. his hair is messy and still bright even though it's dark out. his lips are parted, and cute breaths are puffing out of them
you trace over his face lightly, over each and every one of his freckles, smiling.
but he's a restless sleeper. it kinda seems like any second now, his eyes will snap open and he'll start laughing
he'll randomly wake up in the middle of the night and look over at you, and smile or sigh in relief that you're still here and you love him just as much as he loves you
when you wake before he does, which is rarely, and get up to make breakfast, he'll immediately wake up and pull you back into bed, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck
"freddie, i'm hungry!"
he chuckles half-asleep, "stay here, i'll be lonely."
his morning voice is rough and even deeper than it is usually
"nah."
"i'll cook for you later. please?"
"nah. you stay though, you need more sleep!"
"'m not handsome enough, hey?"
"no, you're waking at an ungodly hour, freddie! and you always sleep so late! i love you and as part of loving you i order you to continue sleeping. you work too hard. i love you more for it, but still too hard."
it was true, he got a maximum of 5 hours of sleep a day. just because he was always up late working on something on the mahogany table that sat in your room for the shop, and always rose early to make breakfast for both of you.
"...you have a point. but i wanna be with you!"
"i'll slip into bed later, okay?"
"no! now!"
"i'll be quick!"
you gobble down some cereal, putting some fancy toast that fred likes out with a heating charm
you creep into the room, where, sure enough, he's sleeping
"you're back," he says drowsily, "come 'ere."
he cuddles you in his arms, sighing contentedly as your hands play with his hair
the man loves touching you, always, he's got to be close to you in some sort of way
if he comes home and you're sleeping on the couch, the forgotten television show you're watching blasting out music, he'll shut off the tv (duh) and wakes you up with kisses along your face just because he enjoys the way you react, which is:
"mmph, wha?"
and you blush and try to hide it and his heart goes absolutely crazy at the sight of it.
he likes having random conversations about anything and everything whilst you lie side to side with him, his hands tracing yours.
"what are your thoughts on tattoos?"
"i dunno, they're good if they're done well? why? you thinking 'bout getting one?"
"maybe."
"whoa."
"would you still like me if i got a tattoo?"
"depends on where and what."
"a hungarian horntail on my face."
"hot."
"really?"
"no. it'll ruin your features."
"oh? features?"
you absentmindedly nod, "yeah, your cute freckles and your nose and your eyelashes and your- what am i even doing? you know i think you're absolutely handsome, beautiful, whatever you like, you're awesome. you'd probably even look good with a stupid picture on your face, no fair."
you look over at him. he's blushing a very very bright red. when he see's that you've seen, he buries his face into your hair.
"aww, is lil freddie boy shy??" you mock him.
"no i'm not!"
"so what tattoo are you gonna get?"
"something with my siblings and something else too."
"where?"
"i dunno, on my chest or my arm?"
"oooh okay, can i come and watch?"
"you sure you can handle shirtless me?"
"y-yeah?"
"then i'll get both on my chest then."
"okay!"
sure enough, he gets an 'IV' and a 'G' on his torso
but i feel like he's the guy to want to go to the gym and make a habit out of it, because he was so lanky in his schoolboy years (fredlives!au) and he always goes late at night with a muggle friend.
and when he comes home from the gym after taking a shower there he just sees you singing in an off-tune voice to music as you wash the dishes, dinner prepared for him
even though you're absolutely horrible at cooking, you've got a few dishes mastered without burning the house down and you always decorate your dishes with the basil molly sends you
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the first time you wear his jumper, it's by accident. pansy parkinson, the resident matchmaker and casual prankster, has jinxed all of the students' clothes to swap with those of others as part of a prank war with, well, everyone, and the best thing? you can't swap back until pansy says so or there will be consequences
because with pansy parkinson, there are always consequences
so you wake up one morning, excited to go to hogsmeade finally, and you find a complete stranger's clothes in your own wardrobe
you huff and try to summon your own clothing, because all the wardrobe has is red, yellow and shades of grey
not only that, it's at least 5 sizes bigger
the accio! charm is blocked. damn pansy for her brilliant wandwork, you think
you look over to your dormmates. well they're lucky, one has got her boyfriend's clothes, one has got cho chang's wardrobe, and the other is fully embracing the emerald culture of the slytherin house
so you carefully fish out a comfy looking hoodie that might be able to be worn, ignoring the fact that it smells very very nice
you decide not to go in the underwear cabinet, because privacy
and you borrow a pair of leggings from your friend, because you wouldn't be able to wear the trackpants and slacks without tripping over every step
and you end up going unknowingly to breakfast in fred weasley's jumper
his favourite one too
and for the first time, why is it only the first time? he notices you
and he thinks it's definitely his favourite jumper now that he sees it hanging adorably off of you, the sleeves even rolled fall to past your fingertips and the end of the jumper reaches to past your thighs
and he's wearing george's clothes, because pansy just had to
so whilst you're in his jumper giggling and being impressed with your friends over boys who are wearing shirts sizes too small, he approaches you
"sup, darling," he says confidently
your friends erupt in giggles but you look at him confusedly
"who are you? sorry, i don't mean to be rude."
and he's just disappointed because surely everyone has heard of fred and george weasley?
and a neat, flirty conversation starts
you find yourself slowly being charmed by his jokes and raw laughter
and at the end, you're surprised when he tells you that you've got his jumper on
but he does seem like a heavy gryffindor patriot
and you find it kind of cute?
well, there's no going back from here, you think, come on, i can't crush on someone i've just met??!!!
but you can, and you do
and he invites you to go to the three broomsticks with him
you look to your friends and they just giggle and nod like the idiotic darlings they are
and you end up having a splendid time with him and become very good friends
the second time you wear his jumper, it's his quidditch one
he just randomly dumps it into your lap and you're super confused because yeah, you might like him but you're not dating or anything?
"hey fred?"
"mm?"
"why did you give me this?"
"to wear it?" he deadpans.
"isn't it a couples thing to do?"
"so now you don't wanna be a couple?"
and although you're cheering for your house and you don't find quidditch too interesting, you go for the sake of him
he finds it so hard to concentrate when he knows you're watching him, in his jersey
you occasionally look up from your conversation with hermione to watch for the snitch
but you can't take your eyes off of fred, he's casually flying about, and he looks absolutely handsome as he beats away the bludgers, grinning and winking at you
you nearly faint just like the tons of other girls who the wink might be directed at
the third time you wear his jumper, it's the morning after you stay over at his place (fredlives!au)
and you're in the sweater molly knitted for him and he almost dies inside because the sight before him is just so sweet and endearing and reminds him of the first time he ever saw you
you look up at him from the book you're reading and raise your eyebrows, because he's smiling and it's a quiet smile
"what?"
"i'm so lucky."
"to?"
"for."
"for?"
"you."
you laugh and fred swears it's the best thing he's ever heard and you're the best thing he's ever had
when he tells you that, you just frown
"is that supposed to be good?"
he's astounded because here is a goddess who doesn't even know her effect on people
it's now he realises he wants to tell you how beautiful you are every day and night and he wants to marry you
he doesn't think you even need him, the way you're pondering over a book and sipping a cup of coffee, you're so fiercely independent
but he needs you, he decides
"do you wanna read this or no? 'cause you're burning holes in my head, my love," you say
he doesn't reply, instead just hugging you as tight as he can
"you're not going anywhere," he says stubbornly
"i wasn't planning to," you reply ever so casually, flipping the page of your book
"good."
the fourth time you wear his jumper, it's a big coat that he's draped over your shoulders because it's cold and dark
you're walking through hogsmeade and you're so tired, so you lean on him, feeling your head slump onto his chest
and you just about fall asleep and nearly fall over before he catches you
"just a few more metres," he keeps saying gently, his arm around your waist
"but i'm comfy," you whine
"but you can't fall asleep here, love."
"try me."
and anyone who's walking on the street can clearly see that he's utterly whipped for you by the way he looks at you with such bright and sparkling eyes
even under the moonlight, you're beautiful and you're still in his coat after all these years
"i love you."
"i love you too," you reply drowsily.
"i love you, i love you, i love you..." he repeats.
when you're home, he'll gently take off your clothes (with your consent, of course) and run you a hot bath
he'll dress you in soft pyjamas and cuddle you even though you're already half asleep and kiss your forehead just before you doze off
and he's so good to you and you're so good to him
he's just always smiling happily around you because you are his sunshine and his world
the fifth time you wear his jumper, it's a red puffer jacket
yes, he's still a gryffindor patriot after all these years
and you are walking through the snow with him to wherever he's taking you
it's a pretty little reserve and you gasp at the flowers that are frostily blooming
"it's so wonderful, freddie!"
there's no reply. you look over to him and he's on one knee
"y/n l/n, i-i don't know what i would do without you. you're my everything," he pauses. he adds smoothly, "marry me?"
and you nod and he beams brighter than ever before and kisses you deeply, sneakily putting a silver ring with a ruby on it onto your fourth finger
he wants to go to work when he's sick, he doesn't care, he just wants to work to not leave it all to george
you reassure him that george has taken off days for angie a l l t h e t i m e
but he's sick
and he hates feeling useless
but the idea of a day in bed watching and being with you is very comforting
until you remind him that you have work and you're going to take his place at the joke shop too
he's always very clingy, but now he's even more
"please, please, please, please, please stay??" he sniffles.
"freddie-"
"do you not love me anymore!?" he cries out dramatically.
"i do, very much, but i need to get to my job," you emphasise job, "i'll send someone over soon to check up on you, okay? as soon as i get home we can do whatever."
"we have enough money."
"it's not about that, freddie, it's about discipline and workplace things. i'll be back, i promise."
and you set out soup and ice towels for him and charm some tylenol pills to tip into his hands every 4 hours
before you quickly head out before his puppy dog eyes actually work
you get molly to visit him and he thoroughly enjoys her company and her food
and he dozes off
when you return home, you're surprised to see him sprawled on the couch sleeping
you take care not to rustle the bags you are holding so as to not disturb him and make dinner
as you're preparing water and cough medicine for him when he wakes, he creeps up to you and wraps his arms around your waist from behind
which scares you a little, but you greet him with a kiss on the cheek
"hello freddie."
"you're back. you. took. so. long," he casts you a disapproving gaze
"mhm but i'm back!"
"yay." he sighs contentedly, "i missed you."
"it was literally 9 hours."
"9 hours too long."
you giggle, "that's 0 then."
"exactly."
"how are you feeling? do we need to go to the doctor? you took your medicine right," you raise a hand to his forehead, "better, not the best. hmm. how many hours did you sleep?"
he chuckles deeply at the state of your worriment, "i'm feeling okay, bit groggy, no we don't, yes i did, all of them, and 4 hours."
you nod, "do you want to eat? or later?"
"i never wanna eat," he folds his arms and you laugh
"really? then i'll eat."
he watches you eat with a frown
"you need to eat."
the frown contorts into a smirk
"i will eat."
"that's good."
"on one condition."
"yeah?"
"you give me one minute of cuddling for every bite i take."
you huff, "whatever, you just need to eat or you won't get better, okay?"
and he takes tiny tiny bites
and you laugh because what a cutie
"y'know if you eat slower that's less time for cuddles right?
his eyes widen and he quickly finishes the rest of his food.
you smile, hopping on the couch and when he sits next to you he wraps his arms back around you and rests his head on your chest
you run your hands through his red hair, and he sighs
and he eventually falls asleep
if you even try to leave the couch, he'll just immediately hold you tighter
"i'm sick," he dramatically sniffles, "you can't just leave me."
and you laugh and shake your head
"you're a baby."
"yes, love me."
"i do love you."
"act like it then. i'm sleepy, and please don't leave me."
"okay, okay."
and the next day, he's all g
but you've got a cold
it's not that bad because you get colds every winter
so you decide to call in sick and tell fred you're sick and to get you some medicine on the way home
and as soon as he hears 'sick' he's called george to tell him you're sick, cooked up some comfort food and got a whole lotta pills
you walk out of the bedroom and he's just there cooking and you're like o-0
"freddie..."
"okay first of all, you're sick, and you're cute, and second of all, you can't cook when you're sick and third, it's hard being sick so i'm gonna take care of you."
"i'm not even that sick, freddie, just a runny nose and a bit of a cough."
"i don't care. you're sick."
and you just accept it, "thank you freddie, i love you."
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when you first brought fred back to your childhood home, your father absolutely loved him
he showed him how to play card games and how to fix cars and treated him like a son
fred explained to them that he owned a joke shop
your dad could not be more pleased and he asked fred if he could visit it some time
fred said that he would try to expand it to the muggle world
they ended up talking about investors and things like that and your father even invested a bit into the company ('so that even if you dump him, y/n, i'll still be in touch with him')
your mother? she took a lot longer to come around
she was suspiciousTM of him because she only wanted the best for you
and okay, he was super handsome and very very polite and had the cutest little freckles and brown eyes but she was still suspicious
of course, fred picked up on this and asked you why
"she's a mother, love, give it some time. if she doesn't see how absolutely splendid you are then her loss."
"but what if she hates me?"
"i promise she doesn't."
sure enough, she found out she didn't hate him at all
you had gone out with your muggle friends and encountered a childhood bully
she had asked you about your life and you had politely answered, "just peachy, how are you?"
and she had asked you if you had a boyfriend
to which you answered "yep."
your friends had commented that "he's the cutest to her!" and "he's so nice it's unreal!"
and so she had... slapped you? because you didn't deserve love, apparently
and you had stumbled through the door, and fred, who was currently talking to your parents about his business, had immediately noticed something wrong and began comforting you
he magicked up some ice and held it to your cheek and asked you what had happened
he was angry but more focused on you
and your mum just watched him be so patient with you and she saw the way he looked at you with so much love and adoration
whilst it was the night and fred was getting some water and some more ice for your cheek, he bumped into your mum
"oh, hello, mrs l/n," he nervously greeted her.
"call me by my name, dear."
he was surprised, "o-okay."
"are you scared of me?" her tone was amused.
"uh, slightly? i don't know if you like me or not and i know that y/n's far too pretty and too nice for me but i'd really like it if you liked me because-"
"stop, son, i have to admit, i didn't like it at first, because only the best for my little girl, but you- i like you. you're fine."
he grinned
"thank goodness."
"you are a handsome little thing, though, a little bit like my husband back in the day. and y/n is very very fond of you. usually she gets unattached to a hobby or a boy in weeks, but you can tell she really loves you."
it made fred beam and your mother beamed too
no more was said as they both went off to sleep
the next day your mum invited him to go to tea and you and your dad were just o-0
and they were cracking jokes and your mum occasionally roasted him
when you visited the burrow, you were a little bit nervous but you had visited a bit before, instead this time you were his girlfriend and not his best friend
molly didn't know at all, she bustled you into a warm hug and complimented you and that was when she noticed fred's arm around your waist and you cuddled up to the side of him
"what is this?" she gestured to you two.
"we're dating," fred said casually.
molly was silent.
you looked up at him frantically, and he just smiled sweetly and kissed your forehead
"i am so glad, y/n! i thought you both would never get a move on, oh, arthur! our fred's with y/n!"
"rather new, darling," arthur said, smiling, "congratulations."
you breathed a sigh of relief and fred smiled, tracing your palm gently
obviously his siblings loved you
you would braid ginny's hair and weave little flowers in
you would trade your spare chocolate frog cards with ron
you would help george with angelina
you would give percy book recommendations
whenever charlie visited you talked about dragons with him
and you would reassure bill that fleur still indeed loved him
these things made fred go wild
he realised a few things: you were a huge nerd, and he wanted to marry you
in which y/n l/n teaches her best friend fred weasley how to calculate taxes. the fluffiest of fluff, with a sprinkling of math.
fred weasley x genderneutral!reader
word count: ±0.9k
tw: math, mess
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ft. visiting fred's place
how could I make sense when I got millions on my mind?
how rich men do it
"this place is a mess," i muttered to myself, the plastic bags filled with groceries rustling as i quickly cleaned up the ginormous house with a flick of my wand. i set the food on the counter.
my parents had always brought some type of fresh food to the houses they were visiting and that stuck with me and my sister. whenever we visited mum and dad, we would separate what we would buy them. i would get them the fun things retirees are supposed to be enjoying and my sister would get the food and necessities.
"oh, hi," fred said absentmindedly.
his hair was messy and his eyes seemed unconcentrated.
"what's up with you?"
"trying to do taxes. i don't get how rich men do it!"
"really? the great, magnificent, ever so wealthy, mister weasley, son of arthur weasley and molly prewett, brother to-"
he folded his arms, "stop."
"yes, the humble peasant is at the service of mister weasley. want me to teach you?"
he nodded.
"magic word?"
"please."
"it was actually abracadabra but i'll let it slide this once," i pulled out a calculator.
"so, you got a tax table right?"
he nodded, pulling out a piece of paper with his tax statement on it.
"no, no, freddie, your tax statement and your salary are private, don't show it to me, i'll teach you through examples?"
"what's there to hide anyway??" he pouts.
"it's a matter of privacy, i think. now, to calculate your tax, you use the table."
"news flash," he quips sassily.
"well, there are levels to the table, right? and so, for example if the tax table is like this," i gesture to the table, "you need to find your salary on the table."
"what if i can't see my salary?" he asked.
"then you are in the $180,001 and over bracket."
"to calculate your tax, you separate your salary into many different brackets. if i earn $200,000 dollars, this is how i would calculate it. you need to pay tax for every single dollar over 18,200, so you must calculate it separately for each bracket of income you have."
i wrote down a procedure.
(200000-180001) x 0.45 + (180000-120001) x 0.37 + (120000-45001) x 0.325 + (45000-18201) x 0.19
i looked over at him. he definitely wasn't following at all.
"earth to taxpayer!!" i waved my hand before his eyes.
"huh?"
"just focus for this lil bit, okay, it's an easy concept to grasp."
"this...is easy?"
"rich men do it. rich women do it. you can. aren't you a rich man?"
he pouted cutely.
"okay, so just focus, a little, little bit? you need to grab your table, and calculate- helllooo?"
he was staring at me with a far-off look in his eyes.
"yeah, i'm listening. definitely."
"look, freddie, if you just listen and calculate the taxes, i'll do anything. i know, it really doesn't make sense because i'm the one teaching you but i have a feeling the taxes may be due at midnight today."
"anything?" his eyes were eager and calculating.
"well nothing that risks my life-"
"of course. continue explaining, please."
"oh, alright! you do it step by step-"
"got my taxes!"
"awesome, i knew you could do it. send the money off before you forget."
"okay, i just put in the tax deductions and send it off?"
"yeah!"
i was reading a book i had found lying randomly around when he tapped me on the shoulder.
i memorised the page. 134.
"mhm?"
he was looking down at me, smirking. i sighed.
"you promised me anything."
"okay. and?"
"i have something."
"alright."
"you have to admit that you love me."
"i love you," i said, giving him a big wide grin, "happy?"
"no."
"what?"
"love me more than as a best friend."
i felt my eyes widen. how had he known?
"w-what, i don't love you m-"
"y/n, seriously."
"okay. fine. i love you, more than a best friend, i have for a little while," i admitted, casting my eyes down in dismay as to try to avoid seeing his expression, "er, what was the point of this?"
there was silence, "yeah so, hopefully our friendship isn't ruined, i'll have you know i'm very good at moving on from people, so no worries at all."
i looked up at him. he looked shocked.
"i-i was only joking," he said.
"oof, okay, well this is a bit...not good," i immediately sprung up and smiled at him.
"wait. it was a joke."
"i got that part," i retorted.
"but it was a joke to-to..."
i laughed, "okay, okay, we laughed, okay freddie? there's no need to freak out. has a girl seriously never confessed to you befor-"
"it was a joke to hide my poorly concealed feelings."
"for?"
"you."
"that's legit?"
"yeah. it is. i love you too."
i felt a smile break onto my face.
"do you want to be my girlfriend?"
i nodded, "yeah, i'd like that."
"and sorry."
"huh?"
"i've loved you ever since i saw you. sorry it took so long for me to realise."
