hands
small freelancer/gavin fic. extremely self indulgent
// tags / info: freelancer is nonverbal here , not a lot of speech , gavin speech very short
inspired by @vegafan69 ‘s one hand kissing post with them
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Hands.
It was an odd body part, honestly. Easily recognisable, used in every aspect. But it wasn’t anything special.
To Freelancer, at least.
Their hands weren’t anything special. Sure, they used them often, they could do magic or.. whatever with them. But it wasn’t special to them. Wasn’t appealing. Just a body part that they tended to hate more than others.
Scanning their own hands, seeing all the scars; dulled cuts and skin that never really fully healed around their nails. They closed their hand into a fist, opening it before closing it again. Their brows furrowed slightly.
They weren’t the comparing type by any means, but they couldn’t help but visualise their hand against their friends. Lasko’s hands are smooth, soft. Huxley’s are a little rough, but nice nonetheless. Damien’s was a little frayed around the edges, calloused, but they liked it. Gavin’s were perfect. But theirs? They hated it.
Maybe it was the scars violently reminding them about what they’ve been through. Maybe it’s the memories that they hold. Maybe they didn’t like it just because it was apart of themselves. All options considered, they slowly put their hands on their knees. Eyes flicking to one hand to the other and back again. Their lips pressed into a frown.
“Freelancer?”
They didn’t bother to look behind them. They knew that voice. That comforting voice, always at their side whenever they needed it. For some reason, he always knew when to come. It was sweet until they wanted alone time. They felt Gavin’s weight on the bed as he sat next to them, and he stayed quiet for a while, as if awaiting something from them. A sentence, confirming if they were okay or not. When they didn’t speak, he frowned.
“You okay?” He tilted his head, and they, in turn, shook theirs, a clear no. He sighed. He hated seeing them upset. Some part of him hurt when they did. His hand hovered above Freelancer’s shoulder, awaiting permission to touch them. They leaned into his hand. He wrapped an arm around them and brought them closer.
He pressed his lips against their forehead, eliciting a small “Mn..” sound from them. Their head moved to rest on his shoulder. “What’s wrong?” Gavin softly asked, earning Freelancer to finally look at him. They looked exhausted, dark rimming under their eyes. Gavin’s heart ached. They looked at him with a certain softness they really only showed him. They glanced down and lifted their hand.
Gavin tilted his head as his other hand that wasn’t holding Freelancer moved to hold their hand. He ran his thumb across their knuckles and they shuffled closer to him. “Don’t like them, do you?” Gavin asked hesitantly, and they nodded, looking embarrassed; glancing up at him before looking away. His brows furrowed slightly before gently lifting their hand up to his face.
He pressed a kiss into their hand. Freelancer quickly looked back with softly flushed cheeks. Their hand felt warm. Gavin’s eyes lifted to look at their beautiful face, looking at them with such admiration through his eyelids. Freelancer’s lips pressed together as they increasingly became flustered. But.. feeling better, as well.
Gavin pressed another kiss to their hand, on a knuckle. Another kiss on each finger. Another kiss in the middle of their hand, his hand idly rubbing theirs in small circles. “I love your hands.” Gavin mumbled against Freelancer’s skin. “I love every part of you.” He added, pressing his lips against their skin once more. They couldn’t take their eyes off of him.
“You’re so beautiful.”
Each kiss was punctuated with another word.
“Gorgeous” , “Pretty” , “Stunning” , “Heavenly”.
“There’s no part of you that I don’t constantly desire, my Deviant.” He hummed against their hand, pulling away as he moved to kiss their cheek. They leaned into him, hands holding his.
“I wish you could see yourself the way I see you. But until then, I’m gonna be here reminding you,” A kiss. “that you’re the most perfect person I’ve laid my eyes on.”
“I love you, Freelancer.” Freelancer stared at him with soft eyes. “You don’t need to talk. I know you love me too, my dear.”
They smiled as they pressed a kiss against his lips.
Looking down, seeing their hand intertwined with his; in that moment, they didn’t feel so bad about it anymore.
