I need to take multiple cocks rn. Like I need cocks, straps, fingers, tongues; literally, need it all so bad. Toys aren’t enough anymore. I need to be used as the toy. Someone make me their stress relief
big news in the blushy sex world!! I think I just had my first internal orgasm.......
this post is me very candidly talking about fucking my own fingers for the first time so keep reading if that interests u <33
soo I've never really explored/played with my front hole before.
few reasons. (1) it's made me dysphoric. and (2) my front hole kinda sucks. I am so tight + dry that any penetration would require a LOT of warming up (and lube. or topical E...) and I've never really wanted it badly enough to do so.
I've tried with a few partners... but being "fingered" made me feel icky. I was always too nervous it would hurt (because it did). and they were so excited they went faster than I was ready for (physically. again, i needed a lot of warm up). most of the time, they couldn't even get the head in and I still stung and tore and ow ow owwww.
so at some point I said "what's the point of being a man with this stupid vagina if I can't even be a good bottom with it" and that was that.
but tonight...
I was face down into my pillow, lazily humping my hand while falling asleep... over my briefs, I started letting myself explore my tdick. slow gentle touches. strokes. fingers on my happy trail, along my ass, down my shaft, over the tip. nothing I've never done before, but this time it wasn't about orgasming. I wanted to feel myself get hard. to figure out what made me whimper and twitch.
safe in my bed, big T shirt on, under the covers, lights off, I re-introduced myself to my own pleasure.
and I found myself tracing along the outside of my front hole.
I applied soft pressure. stimulated myself externally. used what little precum I produced to stroke my dick.
and it actually felt okay. no pain.
so while sleepy and cozy, and without really even thinking, I found myself slipping into subspace and fantasizing about being filled up. my finger circled my hole before prodding in a little further. I was wet (enough) and warm and I could feel myself loosening up a bit. does this feel good? am I thinking too much? do I want my finger inside of me? and before I knew it, my brain was telling me to stuff my finger even deeper than it could physically go. I whined getting to the knuckle. bucked my hips trying to get it further.
something in my brain clicked. and instead of thinking "I'm so dysphoric there's something inside of me" I thought "oh my fucking god I need a cock to fuck me now"
I immediately tried for two fingers.
i was able to work them in, but not without stinging or burning.
so I took a break and mindlessly stroked my cock while picturing being underneath someone. my brain took over and I flipped myself so my ass was in the air and I shoved (just one) finger as far as it would go. i couldn't stop myself from grinding on it. I tried bouncing. I tried rolling my hips. I tried different angles to see where it hit deep inside me. I loved being able to feel myself pull off of it's length and then press back on...
before I could register what was happening, I was panting and whimpering into my mattress, my tdick rock hard slapping against the palm of my hand with every thrust. my eyes went dark and my head went dizzy as I erratically bounced. getting closer and closer to cumming. the intensity was different then when I cum from stimulating my cock. it was deeper. warmer.
before I knew what was happening, my hole clenched around my finger and I could feel my tdick pulsing over and over and over again.. thick cum leaking out of me.
(my dick was still rock hard too after I finished, it was so hot 😭)
woahwaoh woah?!!!!
sooo uhh anyways that's new. and I uhhhh have some more to explore it seems??? but at the end of the day, it feels really nice to have overcome some of the mental barriers I have to my own body. as a switchy verse, it's really easy to not even think about penetration when I'm in a more dom-top mindset or mood. but at some point, I think I avoid falling into subspace because I know I crave penetration to some degree. I avoid looking at bottom-oriented posts. I avoid thinking or referring to my anatomy at all. I avoid letting dominant men flirt with me... all to not think about the fact that I have a vagina.
but mannnnn that would be really cool if I start to like her!
hahahahhahahahah
soooo that said........... any guys wanna help me explore? 🥺
