I microdose European leisure culture by going to my local Italian cafe far too often for someone who works at a cafe,
however this is an essential weekly day off ritual as a future superstar who needs to get writing done.
Also these sunglasses are vintage DIOR I found at an estate sale, girl when I die I hope baddies rummage through my things like that and go āoooo style! Period!ā It felt like bonding with the deceased and carrying on a story.
I just realized Iāve had this leather jacket for almost a decade. Upon reflecting on the hashtags below, and how others may perceive me online, I feel like sharing why itās so precious to me.
Pretty girls arenāt shallow. We are angels on earth and a gift from God.
I do have a proper winter coat but this one is still my favourite- why? Itās the story of how I got it which I hold to my heart. Before the black leather trench trend took place, it was a pouring rain in late spring; I was cold, broke and alone in the hospital, and shared a hot meal ordered by a friend with someone coming off methamphetamines in the waiting room. Everyone was shunning him, not because he was acting erratically, but because this hospital was in a wealthier part of town. He has a name but I donāt know if heās alive. I was in a dark place, in college failing, I had just left an exam without finishing it, and I was fairly suicidal. At the time I was anorexic and suffering from malnutrition. So We talked for a while, he told me some crazy stories about living on the street I now realize was to entertain me and help me feel better. He got called first and left me for a few hours, to which around 3am he came back to the waiting room, woke me up, and said he suffered a brain hemorrhage, they had to operate right away and he didnāt know if heād live or not. He noted that it was pouring rain, I was cold and it dressed for the weather (even though I felt like shit I had to still look good yk) that heās made some bad choices in his life because he just wanted to feel like a carefree little boy again, and literally gave me the jacket off of his back to keep me warm.
He didnāt have family or anyone who loved or valued him despite his flaws, or his substance abuse, and he hoped that I would share his story some day. I didnāt know it then, but at the time i demonstrated an act of kindness not out of pity, but humanity, with the innocence and humility that Jesus teaches us to do. Clothe the naked, feed the hungry, house the strangerā¦ as spineless leaders pervert his teachings this is essential to remember. And although I value my belongings and care for them, they should be a reminder of memories, and we should strive for non attachment of material to reduce collective suffering.
In times of war and economic strife, we have many opportunities to speak up, but more importantly act and intervene to better each others lives.
When I see someone slumped on the subway, I stop to make sure theyāre breathing. I carry naxolone. I feed my friends. When I have decent money (honestly Iām perpetually poor) I share with someone who might need it more, even if itās my last dollar.
Allow this to serve as a reminder or sign, to be who you would need to be. This is what makes being a diva a fabulous attractive aura to be real. This is why Iām magnetic, the way I move. Why I have nothing to my name but Iāve collected fun little things that bring me joy- memories.
If your read all this thank you, I hope it helped you feel inspired and grounded. Now to stop procrastinating on my lyricism āhomeworkā for my band and write.
Mad<3
