I am mentally deranged so I wrote germolene fanfiction
Germolene x reader fanfic
Chapter 1, the house
You are there one day crying because you are a mortal when your remember that you are out of germolene. You hop on your bike and set out to the shops to buy some fucking germolene i guess.
Chapter 2, the pharmacy
As you make your way to Asda pharmacy(tm) you scan the shelf for some germolene and one catches your eye. They are a dashing… tube of local anaesthetic, and as they turn around to look at you their hair swishing you two lock eyes. “Hello sir” the germolene says charmingly as you begin to blush. “Would you like to purchase me for the low price of £5.99?” What a steal you think to yourself as the germolene smiles charmingly.
Chapter 3, the car park
You jump over the counter, scaring most of the other customers and slightly injuring the cashier. Swiftly grabbing your germolene and running for the door the cashier shouts back at you “YOU’LL NEVER TAKE THEM FROM ME!” As you leave the Asda you notice the entire British military is in the car park and they all point their guns at you attempting to shoplift the germolene. As you see, Boris Johnson also has a crush on the germolene. You run as fast as your legs can carry you out of the car park, escaping the military
Chapter 4, the house again
As you make it home the germolene announces “we did it” in a triumphant tone. Sitting down at your table you think to take the germolene on a first date of a romantic, home cooked instant porridge pot. As you are ending your candle lit meal you lean in to kiss the germolene, Unscrewing the cap, AND DRINKING THE ENTIRE TUBE OF GERMOLENE! (This is not romantic in any way it just kills them) yeah, did you ever wonder why you kept running out? Anyway the germolene tasted alright
