gingergonnaginge replied to your post “there are several things about mormon dating that are awful, but one I…”
I don’t know how helpful this is, but I use “going out for ice cream” for this. You know, it’s not a meal or anything serious
I mean this is the best most closest approach and it also allows you to have ice cream which is always good; it’s what I would use if I went on dates for sure. but it doesn’t satisfy my central gripe here, which is that there is no widely-recognized shorthand for “let’s do something that’s low-pressure for both of us and where I don’t expect you to go out of your way to try and impress me because obviously I already like you, so let’s just chat.” it’s a cultural lacuna brought on in the weirdest way and I never realized until just now that we haven’t ever truly filled it?
honestmormonblog replied to your post “there are several things about mormon dating that are awful, but one I…”
Ooooh I second ginger’s comment Also I hear “go and NCMO” is fun BYU slang that everyone loves
winking-widow replied to your post “there are several things about mormon dating that are awful, but one I…”
Not that I get asked out much either way, but I just make myself very vocal about my personal dating policy to do only casual dating until I feel like I could go steady. I’m lucky that I’ve managed to meet dudes who also prefer casual dating.
I guess I didn’t touch on it in this text post but I actually love commitment and am not myself particularly fond of the concept of casual dating? I don’t want to attach lips with another human being and have it mean nothing much and likewise don’t get all the hullabaloo about hanging out with a person for a good little while and then just finding an entirely different person to do that with some other night (and, as a straight dude and in utah, likely paying for all these different dates out of my pocket, which I can’t say exactly thrills me). I just want to be able to explore the romantic kind of emotional connection without worrying about being misconstrued as inhabiting either extreme of “dating around” or “ready to get married after three weeks.” the mormon dating scene, from the limited and strictly secondary contact I’ve allowed myself to have with it for my own sake, is like every math class I’ve ever sat in: it moves excruciatingly slow during the obvious stuff, then accelerates and zips along with reckless speed the second things get more than a little complicated. I want something a lot more even-keeled and there’s no great way to express that while avoiding the sort of self-psycho-analysis I just subjected you all to (which, idk, I’d prefer to avoid on a first date? again, a personal preference.)
