Do you think Sofia called Gracie one last time before she attempted? Do you think she spent the entire conversation spewing more and more verses about repentance, trying to lead her in prayer, begging for any God listening that they would see each other again? Do you think Grace shushed her gently over the radio, told her that this was a time for Sofia's words and not the doctor's? Do you think she apologized, choked up for years of unshed tears, for all of the terror she had caused? Do you think, just for a moment, she laid down her weapons and her armor, and she allowed it all to fall apart around her, failure her only companion, the dentonator for the charges white-knuckled in trembling hands? She knew that Grace wouldn't make it out of Rapture alive. She hoped that she wouldn't.
Do you think, for a few moments, maybe she saw God? Some glimpse of warmth and safety she hadn't ever felt out of Grace's arms. A hot sun on her pale face. Do you think, maybe for a moment, she got to see her friends one more time, smiling beneath the cherry blossoms and urging her to hurry toward the mission building to start their day. Maybe she saw Eleanor's eyes for the first time again when she dragged her under, the watery feeling of the haze of birth replacing the pressure of the ocean in top of her. Maybe she saw her father again, her hands as bruised and shaky as she had been as a girl standing in front of the crowds of the faithful, and maybe the angels gathered to see her come home.
Maybe it was only to escort her to Hell, a fair goodbye to the girl she could have been, but for just a moment.
Do you think Sofia was happy?
