It took me close to a month to finally decide how I wanted to start this, what I wanted my first post to be like. Even now, it's still hard to full articulate exactly what I want to get across, but I think maybe that's what this blog will be about. An exploration of what I really mean when I talk about The Invisible Letters. Here's how I view it now, very simply: the invisible letters are the letters in LGBTQIA that tend to be pushed aside, forgotten, bullied, or told that they aren't real. the B and A, and all of the umbrella terms that fall under them, are the ones that I feel get ignored or pushed aside the most. So let's break it down real quickly so we all have the same understanding of the letters and what they umbrella over.
B: Bisexuality. Bisexuality is when a person, male, female, or anywhere on the gender specturm, is attracted to two gender groups. Traditionally, people view it as someone who likes both men and women, and while this is true, it's not the case for everyone. Some people like men and people who are agender, gender neutral, bi gender, or any nonbinary group. People also seem to think that bisexuals aren't attracted to Trans people and that's false! Trans people who identify as male or female fall within the binary gender group! They are men or women, and I don't believe that viewing them as such erases their identity as Trans. You can acknowledge that someone is Trans and still view them as they are, a man or a woman. And in fact, that's how they should be viewed.
Pansexuality tends to fall under this umbrella, or maybe it's the other way around, with Bisexuality falling under Pansexuality, but either way, it's when someone can be attracted to someone regardless of their gender identity (this includes binary and nonbinary groups!). That's how I understand, but I'm not an expert, so please correct me if I'm wrong!
A: Asexuality. This is, once again, something I know very little about, but let me try and explain it, because it's something I'm a bit more familiar with. Asexuality is when someone feels no sexual attraction in general. However! Someone can still feel romantic attractions. They can be Bi-romantic, Hetro-romantic, Homo-romantic, or even A-romantic, which means they don't feel any romantica attraction either! There is a spectrum for someone's comfort level with sex, and some asexuals are very comfortable with it, others are not, it just depends on the person!
Demisexual: Demisexuals are characterized by a lack of sexual attraction toward any person unless they become deeply emotionally or romantically connected with a specific person or persons. The level of connection it takes for sexual desire to form is dependent on how close the relationship is rather than initial attraction. Like any sexual or romantic attraction, it is not chosen, it something that the person deeply feels, and like asexuality, they could find themselves romantically interested in anyone depending on their romantic interest.
Greysexual: sometimes having sexual attraction and/or feelings, but usually not.Generally asexual but perhaps capable of sexual desire under certain conditions, eg love or romance.
These are the only two I can presently think of that fall under the aseuxal specturm, so once again, feel free to contact me and let me know what I'm missing!
So what was all that about? It was to inform people who might not be familiar with the letters or spectrum that will be talked and written about on this blog. Not everyone is familar with these thiings, and my primary goal right now is to educate and help people understand that these sexualities are very real, and to ignore them is to ignore entire groups of people. Do I know exactly what will become of this blog? No. But I am hoping it turns into a place for people to submit their stories of coming out, of feeling left out, or accepted, of love and fear and everything in between. I'm hoping it can turn into a place for people to feel accepted and to let everyone know that these sexualities exist, and to ignore them does more harm than good. So please join me as I, and anyone who choses to join me, go forth on this adventure to rediscover the Invisible Letters B and A, and more importantly. People.
Love and Solidarity,
Michaela
