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i'm sure you've talked about this before, but can you link some sources that claim that guilt tripping doesn't work, especially in activism? idk, guilt tripping worked on me, maybe i'm just more susceptible to it though. i'd like to actually read some science instead of relying on my personal experience

I don't think i said that guilt trips never work? They obviously do work sometimes, or else I wouldn't have to make so many posts warning people about the existence of certain online activists who use guilt-inducing rhetoric to convince people that they're inherently worthless and unfixably corrupted.

Guilt trips generally don't work on people educated or experienced enough to recognize them for what they are and to set protective boundaries. Unfortunately I don't have any scientific data on this, but it should be easy enough for people to observe.

Guilt trips seem to be very effective on people who never learned to recognize this kind of manipulative behavior, never learned to set boundaries, and have certain mental health conditions (such as scrupulosity OCD) or learned to be people-pleasers (many autistic people report learning to be people-pleasers to try and make people tolerate their company).

So like, the issue with guilt trips isn't that they don't work. It's that the people they're most effective on are mentally unwell, were probably abused themselves (1, 2), and you're basically just exploiting psychological vulnerabilities that were likely either created or worsened through trauma, which is unethical and cruel.

#answered #guilt trips #activists

Guilt is a made up sickness that keeps us from rising to our highest high. If you believe the Christians - we were forgiven just so we wouldn't feel guilty. It is that important, for Jesus sake, stop feeling guilty and don't lay it on anybody else. We all make mistakes doing our best to survive in a world that wants our all where we have to give in order to receive and often it is unfair and we're stuck there doing the best we can. Don't judge, yourself, or others, Amen.

#guilt #guilt trips #laying on guilt #don't feel guilty #guilt is a sickness

hi. sorry for sending this ask. I know it might inappropriate but we badly needed some help right and i hope you’d consider .. its for our cat who needs immediate care, you can find the post in my blog as i pinned it. Hoping you’d be so kind to boost/share to help us alleviate the cost as it would tremendously help us a lot. if you can, pls try to answer this privately as some people might i pressure you to do so.. i know its weird, just wanted to avoid it if possible. Thanks a lot, and sorry again for being so direct. 🙏

okey dokey galpal, here's the thing!

you get a soft 1.5/10 on credibility, because the blog description may have been convincing in isolation, but it's gonna be a big fat 0/10 on pretty much every other metric, because your blog is 21 hours old, so is your pinned post, and this is a literal copypasta of a message someone under a different iteration of your username has already attempted word for word. you don't have a cat, you suck at this, and you should really find a better grift in future. thanks for playing, don't try again!!!

#asks #tumblr scams #scammers #fakes #guilt trips #money grabs #spam messages #bullshit

I'm really tired of the dms of: "Why did you block me?" I get people might wanna know "why". But I get blocked sometimes too and I don't go off and ask people. But I'll get dms on my main like "I'm crying... why did you block me on your side?" I'm allowed to block and ya'll don't need a reason. & it feels uncomfortable with how many people have to ask *why*, or try to tell me there crying or having a panic attack etc. (I really don't like guilt trips. & this is how it feels. Like if someone blocks me. I don't message them going 'omg why did you block me, i can't breathe. :( I'm having a panic attack, pls unblock me" YET I get this. ) all because I blocked them.

#scribbles #chronically online behavior #boundaries #online behavior #guilt trips

If someone feels the need to threaten you to "not mess with them", when you're just trying to reason with them or politely find an understanding or common ground. That's an unhealthy boundary. It's a manipulative way to shut down your right to your own voice, through intimidation.

If someone often brings up their past traumas, current struggles, or perhaps start picking at you for things you did, any time you confront them about hurtful/upsetting things, or are politely disagreeing with them. That's also an unhealthy boundary. And manipulation to shut down your right to your own voice. But through pity/guilt trips. Also to avoid the situation.

If they threaten suicide, violence, self-harm and/or try to blame you for it, that is yet another form of manipulation, through both intimidation and pity/guilt trips. As well as a form of hoovering (trying to suck you back in to them). To make you feel like it's your responsibility. That it's all your fault. That you're a bad person. They want you to take accountability for all their actions and choices they refuse to face and heal. If you're worried they may do something harmful or dangerous, you can give them a help line and/or call 911.

But I want you to know it IS NOT your fault. You are not responsible for their choices. You are not responsible for their actions. And it is not your job or obligation to "fix" or heal them. That is up to them if they truly want to take that path for themselves. And I know it's painful, frustrating, and difficult to accept, for those of you who just want to help, or want them to see and understand. But you need to take care of you, and have your own healthy boundaries too. 🤟💕

#manipulation #threats #guilt tripping #guilt trips #intimidation #hoovering #narcissistic traits #boundaries #healthy boundaries #unhealthy boundaries #healing #self care

Name a technique your parents used to guilt you based on a stereotype that you found out later in life is racially charged...

Here’s an example:

My mother used to guilt me to finish eating by saying “think of all the children starving in Africa”. Upon reaching college, I learned that not every child in Africa is starving and Americans uses Africa as the default poorest country/continent in the world when it’s in fact not.

#guilt trips