#gusenitsaa

[stanfordsweater]

This is fine. Your blog is just like… single handedly dragging me back in and breaking my heart and making me want to watch 15 seasons worth of pain again. This is fine. I’m fine. 😅

:) is it an inappropriate response to say good? i'm glad you're enjoying yourself!! sam and dean have a very special hold on my heart and i'm never going to shake it, probably because i'm a sucker for punishment, haha.... it hurts so good 😭

[killian-whump]

So here’s the thing. I haven’t tied anyone up in weeks. I haven’t mentally or physically reamed anyone in aaaaages. Who am I? WHat is the point? Why am I even here. 42?

Hello, friend. I hear your pain, and oh-boy, do I have a solution!

It’s called Killian Jones™ and it is the scientific community’s answer to all those pesky times in your life when you lack the time or even the energy to whump anyone yourself.

How does it work? Simple. Killian Jones™ works tirelessly in the background, while you go about your business and live your life, actively whumping himself for your enjoyment.

Is there a car in motion somewhere? He’ll stand in front of it. Is there a standing body of water or stagnating kiddie pool somewhere nearby? He’ll almost drown in it. Have some comically large rope handy? Never worry, you won’t even have to tie him up yourself - he’ll do it for you!

How is such an amazing feat possible? Well, the fantastic self-whumping technology behind Killian Jones™ is in part due to recent developments in time travel. Through the wonders of Time Shenanigans™, our latest Killian models are capable of sending themselves back and forwards in time in order to literally whump themselves at any given moment.

However, we also know that self-whump isn’t up everyone’s alley, so each and every Killian Jones™ also comes backed with 24-hour fandom support. A friendly and active group of fans is waiting on standby, needing only the slightest provocation (or, really, none whatsoever) to leap into action and provide all the whumpy fanfic, fanart, headcanons, and prompts that your heart could ever possibly desire.

Amazing!!!

Now, you might be saying to yourself, “That’s great, KW, but how much does something like this cost?” And I hear you, my friend. With the impressive specs and extensive feature list that Killian Jones™ boasts, one could expect to spend a pretty penny for the honor of experiencing one.

But no! Killian Jones™ is 100% FREE!!!

That’s right! Everyone can enjoy the wonder and whump of Killian Jones™ for absolutely no cost at all. All you need is an active internet connection and access to any one of several popular websites (AO3, Tumblr, Fanfiction.net, etc) and you, too, can be sailing the high seas of pirate whump!

So act now and get in on the fun! Killian Jones™ is standing by, waiting to be whumped by one and all - and eager for that whump to be enjoyed by others, regardless of whether they do any whumping themselves or not!

Whumping Killian Jones™ - You can’t afford not to!

[distant-rose]

constellation: the brothers jones (are you sensing a theme)

constellation: what you said after all the pieces came together.

Okay, you all know how I pretend to live in a universe where Liam and Killian were adopted by Nemo and Shakespeare and everything turned out semi-okay for them? Well, I’m going to contribute more to that universe because there is literally only so much angst I can take. So here’s like 1,500+ words of the Jones Brothers meeting Shakespeare.

Silver’s ship is attacked in the late afternoon by the most bizarre looking sky ship that Liam has ever seen. Well, it’s the only one he’s ever seen, but he hadn’t realized they would look so peculiar. He doesn’t allow himself to ponder on this long however, considering the bombardment of canon fire hurtling towards them. Instead he grabs Killian’s arm and yanks him down below into the underbelly of the ship. It’s a coward’s move but Liam has no desire or will to defend the lives of the men who have enslaved him and his brother.

Killian’s eyes are as wide as saucers and he looks more terrified than he did the morning they discovered their father was gone. He hasn’t said a word since the attack started but his fingers shake violently under Liam’s as if his bones are trying rattle their way out from underneath his skin.

They hide in the hull behind the barrels of rum and beer, resting themselves against the crates of ill-gotten gains Silver has acquired over the past few weeks.

“We’re going to die today, aren’t we?” Killian asks quietly, eyes trained up at the ceiling as they listen to the fighting on the deck above them.

“I’m not going to let anything happen to you,” he replies firmly. “I made a promise to Mum to look after you and I intend to keep it.”

“Papa made that promise too…” Tears trickle down Killian’s cheeks and the sight of them makes Liam furious for more reasons than one.

“Well, I’m not Papa, am I?” he snaps. “I’m going to keep you safe. Do you understand me?”

Killian nods, but his eyes avert from Liam’s gaze. It hurts far more than it should. Liam’s fingers curl into fists and he isn’t sure who he wants to hurt the most in the moment – his brother for not believing him or the men above for wanting to hurt them.

Both brothers flinch as the hatch bursts open above them and the ladder whines as bodies start to climb down it. They duck their heads in hopes of being undiscovered. Liam automatically places a hand over his younger brother’s mouth to keep him for whimpering too loudly.

“Best come out and face your fate like a man,” a voice calls out. “We can see your foot behind the rum.”

Liam draws a sharp before, glancing down at their feet. It’s then that he notices that Killian’s ratty shoe is visible. He taps down his frustration as tears start rolling down his little brother’s cheek, puddling onto Liam’s hand.

“Come out!” The voice commands again. “You don’t want me to come over there!”

Killian looks up at Liam with a resigned look on his face that belongs to a much older person and has no place on a seven-year old’s face. He shifts to move out from their failed hiding spot. 

“Don’t!” Liam whispers, shaking his head. “They could be buffing!”

For the first time in his life, Killian doesn’t listen to his older brother. He pushes his hands away and crawls out, shaking like a leaf and trying so hard to make a show of bravery he doesn’t have. Liam’s heart hammers in his chest and everything inside him screams as he turns to watch his little brother’s fate. He’s caught between wanting to save his brother from these invading pirates and wanting to save his own skin.

Pirates, unruly and menacing with their sharp swords and snarling faces, seem taken aback by the small child that appears in front of them. They don’t jeer at him like Liam expected, but stare at him with the same fascination Liam had seen on his schoolmates’ faces when they had discovered a litter of kitties newly born behind the schoolhouse. The one that seems to be in charge, a man with silver hair and wearing a brown long coat, sheaths his sword and looks at Killian with a puzzled expression.

“And who are you supposed to be?”

“Killian.”

“Ah, Killian.” The man repeats his name as if he’s testing how it sounds. “A good name for a young man. How old are you, Killian?”

“I’m seven…and a half…”

“That’s quite a young to be at sea,” the man comments, stroking his chin. “And what brings you onto this ship?”

“I…” Killian looks overwhelmed by the question, squirming in his spot and looking down at his shoes. 

The man’s frown deepens, an indent forming between his brows as he regards Liam’s brother with a strange expression.

“Is your father on board, Killian?” he asks, changing tactics.

“No,” he answers immediately. “Papa sold me for a row boat.”

A buzzing of anger emits from the pirates who share looks of disgust. A trickle of fear runs down Liam’s spine and he shifts to get his feet out from underneath. He has a small butter knife in his shoe. It won’t be do much, but Liam wagers if they go for Killian, he could potentially cause some damage to one or two by taking out their eyes.

The man questioning Killian raises his hand to silence the men behind him. It’s quite clear he holds a lot of authority and Liam would wager the rest of his meager possessions that he’s the captain of the sky ship.

“So, you’re a slave?”

“An indentured servant,” Killian corrects hotly, his cheeks coloring as he speaks.

“Ah, sorry, an indentured servant. A rose by a different name,” the man says before digging a hand into one of the various pockets on his coat. “Do you like candy, Killian?”

Killian’s eyes light up as alarm bells go off in Liam’s brain. He’s seen this ploy before, even been at the end of it. It rarely goes well. Men don’t offer things out without wanting something in return; a cruel bit of reality that Liam has done his best to shield his little brother from. 

He can’t allow this to happen.

“No!” he shouts, revealing himself and leaping over the barrels. He takes a position in front of Killian, shoving his younger brother roughly behind him. He holds up the butter knife as it were a real one.

The man looks bewildered by him, eyes darting between Liam’s face and Killian’s.

“And who might you be?”

“That’s Liam!” Killian pipes up.

“Stop talking,” he hisses. 

“You’re brothers, aren’t you?” the man asks, face softening. 

Liam doesn’t respond, only raises the butter knife higher. He tries to keep a brave face despite the violent trembling of his arm.

“Do you really think you can take us all out with that, boy?” 

“No, but that doesn’t mean I can’t try. I would rather die than let you hurt him.”

“Who said anything about hurting anyone?” the man question in surprise, eyebrows raising to his hairline.

“We’re not idiots,” Liam responds. “We know you’ve killed most of the crew to get down here and you’re going to take the rest of our valuables and slaughter us all.”

“You have a very vivid imagination. Has anyone ever told you that?”

He doesn’t answer him, only narrows his eyes in response. He feels Killian move behind him and automatically throws back his arm to keep him from leaving the minute wall of safety offered by Liam’s body.

“You’re a brave young man,” the man says. “Braver than most men. And you’re smart too. It’s hard to find anyone who is both brave and smart these days. You either have brave morons or smart cowards.”

Liam bites back the smartass response he has dying in the back of his throat. 

“You’re smart enough to know there are only two ways out of this,” the man continues gently. “Either you stay here, stranded on a ship with no food and no provisions or you come aboard the Caspertine with us.”

“And be slaves again,” Liam mutters bitterly under his breath.

“No,” the man responds gruffly. “Not slaves. I have no interest in owning anyone.”

“Then what exactly do you want?” 

“To shape the future,” the man responds. “And you’re it.”

Liam doesn’t quite understand what he means by this, but Killian appears to be done with this entire conversation. He shifts out from behind his older brother’s body and eyes the old man questionably.

“Do you really have candy?”

The old man barks out a loud laugh, taking his hand out of his back and revealing small wrapped squares that look a lot like the taffy packages Liam’s seen in stores around various ports.

“Yes, my boy, I have lots of candy. Unfortunately, this old pirate has a sweet tooth that can’t be tamed.”

“Okay, I’ll go with you!”

“Killian! No!” Liam is half-frustrated, half-horrified.

“What? He’s right. It’s either be here with dead people or go with them. And they have candy,” he responds, popping the taffy into his mouth and smiling up at the old man. “What’s your name, mister?”

“Shakespeare. Captain Theodore Johannes Alberic Shakespeare, my boy.”

send me a word + a pairing and i’ll write you a short fic! 🌙

[vaxilfan]

Brennan jones and his rowboat

[lynyrdwrites]

Lynyrd: :May be currently working on a Klaroline dragon au in which the dragons meet and bond over debating the merits of GMO princesses and also probably have a kitten:

I know this is supposed to be you being me... but this is also a valid prompt.  I want you to recognize that.  

Someday, I’ll write a pro-GMO fic.  I won’t give anyone a forewarning.  By the end, you’ll hate me, but also hate that stupid Triscuits commercial. 

Come into my inbox and pretend to be me

[mryddinwilt]

Umm 2 , 5 , 18 , 29!

2. Whose death hit you the hardest?

Milah. I’m still not over it. Milah deserved better BOTH TIMES. Just the devastation on Killian’s face and the way she says I love you one last time. I’d spend hundreds of years trying to avenge her too!

UGH. And it’s just compounded by the fact that she was murdered twice. And the second time I really wasn’t ready for it. 

5. Killian or David? & 29. Liam or Killian?

Killian. It’s always going to be Killian. As much as I like the others it’s always Killian. Actually if I’m being honest I don’t much care for Liam and even less after S5. So the order is Killian, David, Liam. 

18. What is the saddest non-death scene?

Firebird goodbye. They get to that elevator and just you know this is it and you know Emma can’t take it. The way they both are concerned about the other. Killian doesn’t want her putting up her walls and she wants him to move on. Then add the tears and the crying. The desperation in their body language as they cling to each other for one last time. The kiss through the bars! The slow clank of the elevator and holding hands until the last possible moment mirroring how she held his hand as his body was wheeled away. 

HIS FACE!

And then that last lingering shot of him, alone, in Hell, staring up into the black void. Just. 

I think I blocked that entire thing from my memory until now. So THANKS. 

Ask me about OUAT (repeat a number and I’ll give a different answer...)

[askdetectiverogers]

Look, all I did was point out that the ruckus from next-door distracted me from my pancakes and I think a gentleman would make that right! But nooooooo. Your brother is in a *particularly* foul mood today!

A tinny melody buzzed at the edge of his consciousness.

An alarm. No. A phone. His phone

He jerked, reaching for it in the dark to shut it off before it woke the whole house. He was stiff, sore, and upon opening his eyes, realized abruptly that he was not in Liam’s flat. He shifted again, noting the handcuffs that bound his arms behind the chair he was sitting on.

Liam stood in front of him, unnaturally still. No one else was in the room with them and for a moment Killian felt relief. Then he met Liam’s eyes. Distant and unfocused, it was as though Killian was not even there, or perhaps as though he could not pull his focus from a spot on the blank wall to his left.

“If you don’t let me answer they’re just going to keep calling,” Killian commented.

For a moment Liam didn’t move. Then stiffly, he bent to unlock his right arm.

“Don’t be clever,” a voice that wasn’t quite Liam’s warned him before the cuff clattered to the ground.

The person on the other end of the call managed to garner very little of his attention, babbling something about breakfast and being a gentleman.

He could ask for help.

And put his brother’s life in the hands of an occasionally trigger happy SWAT team.

A familiar weight at his hip informed him he was still armed and his eyebrows furrowed. Whoever was making the decisions here was either extraordinarily stupid, or didn’t give a damn if Liam survived.

“Your brother is in a particularly foul mood today.”

“I daresay he is. But I’m a bit tied up at the moment. Let me call you back.”

If this course of action met with his neighbors’ approval was unclear. But if the flash of anger in Liam’s eyes was any indication, it did not meet with his.

[queen-mabs-revenge]

I always wonder how the people upset with you always find your posts. You always tag. So now It amuses me to imagine there’s a bunch of people that just check you out every once in a while just to make sure you’re not out of line. Rofl

Well, I always tag....in some fashion

:shoves the best organisation system under the bed: I mean --

NOTHING! NOTHING TO SEE HERE! CAPTAIN SWAN PERFECT TRUE LOVE BABY HOPE BLONDE ADORABLE. ALL IS WELL.