#hae thoughts

[haestac]

i hate being sick. cause while being weakened like this makes me a perfect object to abuse, i dont want other people to get sick because of me. i guess thats kinda what makes being beaten up more appealing. i get weakened but its not infecting other people. im just weakened

though imagine someone genetically modifies a virus so that it can only infect my body. they can give me an antidote that can heal me within hours, but they can also just choose to infect me again if they want. sprinkle some of it in my food and im bedridden for as long as you want. just give me a lighter virus if you want me to be able to crawl and move, give me the full virus if you want me to feel every abuse but be too weak to even lift my arms in protest

a virus that can only infect me. i could go in public without worries because no one else would be infected. anyone can harass me physically and sexually and ill be too weak to do anything about it. they could use my holes or drink my tears and itll be safe because the virus only infects me

if only

if only..

if only the virus could only infect me

[haestac]

one problem with wanting to be controlled and restricted and used for their own desires while disregarding my own is i dont know how to fantasize about that. i also dont know what my imaaginary fantasy dom abuser would be like and what their preference is so idk what would please them

[haestac]

maybe its depression about the state of the world, or maybe its depression about my current life. but yeah, i might be more inactive here for a bit

[haestac]

after being so depraved in this account for a few weeks, i didnt expect to want to indulge on softer kinks for a bit. its fun. but now im yearning for sweetness in my life, this is unfair

[sinful-hae]

I was wondering when a weird conversation would arise..and here it is. I'm talking about murdering a chicken with a sword.

[sinful-hae]

I want to para, plot, go to fun places with friends, go get food, go to a cafe, go cosmic bowling, play with glow in the dark paint, I also want a lot of sweets...

[sinful-hae]

I sometimes wonder how I acquired so many candies and various treats..

[theoneandonlyhaebyeol-demig-blog]

Okay, so I've been thinking about this for awhile and I just want to say something about it. 

A lot of the time, when I come on or when I go to the confession, I see people saying that they're lonely, that they feel left out and that they're not part of this family. I am just so appalled when I see it. In a directory this big, no one should feel left out and lonely. 

I know it's not really possible to be everyone's friend, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try. If someone makes a "hello" post and you don't normally talk to them, don't just scroll over it. Take the time to say hi. Learn about them, maybe offer to go eat with them. You never know, they could be your next best friend. 

I know it's scary and uncertain when talking to new people, or people you haven't before, but that shouldn't stop you. If things don't click between you two, then that's okay. The main thing is you tried. 

TL;DR- Try to make friends. Don't leave others out. We're a family. Even if we're not related by blood, we're still a family.