#hakiojkl hyperion

[crqstalite]

“When they declared you KIA, I fought it. I couldn’t let go, they said. It almost earned me a psych discharge. As the years went by, I started to believe them...where have you been?”

“...until the Alliance freed me...”

“So I’ve been the only one losing sleep.”

“There were dreams. I saw you die. I saw everyone die.”

“Now you know they were only nightmares.”

“We’ll both sleep easier tonight.”

“Eventually.”

I most definitely did not spend one of the last days of my sub playing speed-running Hakio through the early chapters of KOTFE to get another Jorgan kiss because I didn’t have any with those two. The second line of the caption, I intended to write about her time away from him, but there’s a spoiler for Shadow of the Sith with the reason she was ripped away from Aric, so I kinda cut corners.

Totally blindsided by this because I was very sad about this reunion but also very happy that she got her man back. It’s such a sweet reunion too, with the little callbacks to their time fighting together, Bioware had better get on their keyboards and program some new vanilla romance interactions next update. There’ll definitely be a special chapter for these two included somewhere soon.

I also figured I should actually play some of my outlanders through Knights but I’ve been too lazy to level them through Shadow. I think Corsha’s going to be next to go through because she’s romancing Koth (I’m prepared to be disappointed, no worries), which I’ll use as a template for Mierrio’s story.

Also like, some of the Knights armor sets are actually kind of nice, like the Trooper one you receive right after Chapter IX. Recolored it in white and orange, chef’s kiss, these screenshots were beautiful.

[crqstalite]

ba’shira alyen cadera - of primarily asian descent. as i do more research i’ll find out where. hakiojkl sayito hyperion-jorgan - of african descent. see above. corsha qvael revel - of indian + african descent. see above. mellena ellana wryen-cadera-shan - of european descent. see above.

guess who’s putting off writing more shadow and is instead making more of these artbreeders??

it’s me. it’s always me.

anyways, these are a few edits to show how i see a few characters v. how well i can draw + the clonky swtor graphics (character designer). artbreeder took my boy (axis) and gave him actual eyes instead of red retinas, so he’ll be uploaded another day. while artbreeder has some, say bugs when rendering photos (corsha became something straight off stranger things, probably because the screenshot was a tad dark), it’s still AMAZING for being an AI. so now i have some nice headshots of the babies i was able to replicate in the image mixer.

[crqstalite]

without you. [kotfe letters]

So I felt sad last night and decided I didn’t want to finish my original thought for Tri and Malavai, so I wrote this monster of a piece, all letters, from my toons to their love interests. Now of course, I’m more sad than I was before and accomplished next to nothing. Is Ronnie canon for the Heritage universe? Bruh who knows at this point?

Written: 10.12.19. Words: 3,799.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

TO: Kira Delux

FROM: Kiveqil Delux

SUBJECT: About Satele

-

I guess we finally found our answers. That child you assumed Satele had? Finally met him. That's right, Satele Shan, a hero of the Republic and devout Jedi had a son with none other than a commander. Crazy, right? His name is Theron, I'm sure you would've liked him if you were here. Just a tad annoying sometimes, but friendly enough.

Please, Please let me find you,

Kiveqil

-

He sends it, but isn't sure it'll reach it's intended recipient. Guzzling down another glass of wine, he slams his hand down on the bar to get the droid's attention for another. Usually a Jedi doesn't drink, if at all. This one, is in pain and his aura radiates as such. A singular tear slips down his pale cheek as he rubs a hand against his eyes.

-

TO: Archiban Kimble

FROM: Una'vi Havelzy-Kimble

SUBJECT: Ronnie.

-

It's been so long, but I would never forget a face. Especially not yours. Not someone who loved me like no one else would. Someone, who even though I fell from the light, never stopped caring about me. Thought I was still the best thing to ever happen to you, right down to every little freckle on my face.

You haven't met Ronnie yet. That's our son's name, but it can't be too hard to change once I find you again, if you want. He was as much a surprise to me as he was to Kiv. Obviously at first he was pissed, but he treats Ronnie like a son himself. I think it's rather endearing, but make no mistake. My heart belongs to you first and foremost, and as soon as I find you, you're getting the longest kiss in the history of kisses, got it?

Updated: I visited Ralltiir with Ronnie today. I...I searched for you high and low, but no one could give me an answer to where you were. I can't find you, Archie. It's been five years, this galaxy is only so big. Where are you?

-

She shuts off the terminal, rubbing at her eyes as she shifts her grasp on the young, dark haired child in her arms. She chuckles, should her son get any bigger, they'd have to work out the fact that mommy can't pick him up as much anymore. She frowns as she lays him down next to him, the boy curling up on his side against her. Everyday, he looks more and more like her husband, and something about that unsettles her.

-

TO: Felix Iresso

FROM: Naji Iresso

SUBJECT: Anniversary.

-

Today's our anniversary, Felix. I'm sure you remember, you always did. How sweet you'd be to me, how you'd beg for me to return to bed with you. Sleep is scarce these days in the Alliance, and most of my time is spent with the Commanders, trying to get things done. But once all the blaster fire has passed overhead, I come back to my quarters every day and pray I see you one last time before I take my final breath.

There is no death, there is the Force. I just wish that the Force would bring you back to me.

With Love,

Naji

-

Delicate singing fills the air as lays on the grass, hair pooling out beneath her as the stars twinkle down at her. Tears well up in her eyes as she prays Felix hasn't become one of them. Simpler times would've allowed her to spend the night with him, more than enough time in the galaxy together. Now all there is, is blaster fire, lightsabers igniting, fighting. So much discord in the galaxy, and not one signature cries out like his does.

-

TO: Corso Riggs

FROM: Ghenkl Riggs

SUBJECT: My Last Run.

-

Think I'm gearing up for my last run around the galaxy searching for you, Corso. As dismal as it sounds, I think this is finally the end. I'm not a teenager anymore, I'm not twenty anymore. I'm already forty, and as much as I love you I can't keep perking up at every mention of some smuggler terrorizing the galaxy. I wish it were you, but it never is.

Bet you'd laugh if you saw me now, all run ragged with grey hairs. Drinking more than I should because I know my final days are coming. Rum, beer, the like. Stars, just come home, please.

Fun while it lasted,

Ghen

-

It's not hard to see the woman is exhausted, dark circles underneath her eyes as she clenches a blaster in her hand. It's well worn, but clearly well loved as she looks down at it fondly. Rubbing at her eyes, she stands away from the terminal and holsters it. What's running through her mind isn't clear as she walks away quickly, her head held high as she grimaces.

-

TO: Aric Jorgan

FROM: Hakiojkl Hyperion-Jorgan

SUBJECT: Home.

-

Home is where the heart is. That's what my mom says every single day, every day I come back to her. It's been a while since I've been on Coruscant.

It reminds me too much of you. What we've done, what we've accomplished. Who we've saved, who we've avenged in the name of the Republic. After officially being discharged from the military when I did get back, Garza kept a spot open for me the whole time. I never wanted back in, I couldn't handle being in a squad without you as my right hand man.

Blast it, writing things always made me jumpy. I could never get my words out right, and it just sounds back even typing this. But gods, Aric you're my husband. If you've been sending me things, I'm sorry I never found them. I don't know what you're doing out there, but I'm sure you're doing some damn fine work. I don't know whether you're alive or not, what happened to the rest of Havoc.

I haven't been home in years. My heart still lies with you, and until I find you, I'm homeless.

Love,

Hakio

-

The dark skinned woman isn't quick to rise from her seat after meetings anymore. The way she lingers, as if she's waiting for someone is unsettling. As if ghosts haunt the hall ways of the Odessen base, as she crumples on the ground without her real leg, phantom pains making her cry out for her lover. With no one to save her but her previous comrade, it's a heart shattering walk back to her cabin as she cries over and over again for him to come get her.

-

TO: Elara Dorne

FROM: Xev'heng Lumere

SUBJECT: Last Life Day.

-

Dearest,

You've always been good at treating me right. I feel like I haven't exactly provided for you since then.

It's been years, I know. I know someone like you would've found someone else, someone to support you through all of this. I know I loved you, I know you loved me. But I abandoned you, for five years. Five years of pain, five years of longing. I know it's been hard for me, but I can't imagine how hard it's been for you.

I'm searching for you as I write this. The Alliance has been searching for recruits, but as much as they need a new medic, I need you. I need you back, Elara. I've been a mess without you, and I can't last like this.

-Xev

-

It isn't hard to see how the man grieves. A portion of his lekku is missing as the other hangs limply down his back. One of his previously lavender eyes has gone grey, though he's always so quick to find his old commanding officer to help her through the pain. However, his suffering hides far beneath his smiles and sarcasm.

-

TO: Malavai Quinn

FROM: Tri'ama Amarillis-Quinn

SUBJECT: Stations.

-

It's always been a matter of station with you, hasn't it, Malavai? Statistics, reports, briefings. Rising in the Empire after hitting a ceiling. A rising star before being kept on Balmorra. Then, you met me. Things changed after that, didn't they? You met Vette, who you despised at first before you came to care for her. You met Jaesa, though you weren't ever terribly clear what you thought about her. You met Pierce, who you thoroughly hated, though you worked with him well. And Broonmark, though neither of us grew terribly close to our furry protector.

You tried to kill me. End my life there on the Transponder Station above Corellia. How it pained you so, how I had to hear some of your bones crack sickeningly against the blastdoor. How you made me jump for months afterwards. How I still didn't trust you completely when I agreed to marry you, agreed to let you back into my quarters, back into my heart.

What am I trying to say, Malavai? I'm trying to say that though I was horrible about showing what I thought about you, that I loved you. That I loved the way I could catch you off-guard by planting a sneaky kiss on your cheek. That I loved the way you could catch me off-guard by pulling me in, one arm around waist as you kissed me hard. The way we would wake up together in the morning, and go to bed together at night.

You've surely risen in your station, Malavai. I hope the last few years have treated you well, that you've finally become more than just a Captain. That you can lead an army of your own men now, instead of being in that army. I wish the best for you.

I don't know where the Alliance is taking me, but galaxy be damned if they try to keep me from my husband.

Once you told me you wished to continue being my loyal captain and dutiful husband -I kept your letters after all these years, yes- to that I respond with this: I wish to continue being your imposing Darth, and loving wife. Do you understand that, hubby?

Do you know how much I miss you? How much I still love you?

-Tri'ama.

-

The Darth is harder to read, her emotions aren't as prominent as others who have lost their lovers. She accepts, she moves on. She continues to cut down those who stand in her way, she continues to be a beacon of hope for the Empire. But something about the way she doesn't let anyone take care of her injuries, is worrying enough.

-

TO: Andronikos Revel

FROM: Mierrio Revel

SUBJECT: Wine.

-

Remember how I didn't ever like that you drank as much as you did? How I'd be annoyed when you came back wasted?

I see the appeal now. It gives me time to forget about the pain of losing you. About the pain of being alone. I feel fuzzy, like the last five years have all been a dream instead of my twisted reality. It burns me so bad, but I'm willing to endure a bit of pain just to forget how much I miss you.

Hate wondering whether you've finally kicked the bucket, with all the kriffing shit you get into. Your reckless flying, the way you'd nearly sacrifice your dumbass for me. I can't feel your presence anywhere, and that scares me somedays, Nikky. You never knew whether we were going to be together forever, and neither did I. Back then I wouldn't have cared less for you saying something like that, because whatever came up we'd kill it together.

Now you're gone, and I'm still here. I know you said that we'd be together forever, while we were in each other's orbits, and until the stars finally went cold. I'm scared, Nikky. I really think this is the end. It's been too long for you to still be out there.

Come home, you kriffing dumbass. You know where to find me.

-M

-

From first glance, you never would've guessed the woman was a Sith, capable of murdering hordes of enemies beneath her lightsaber and lightning. She looked like nothing more than a spaced out spacer, staring out into the void of her ship, throwing back yet another bottle of rum. Something snaps, as she throws the glass bottle against the wall, and it shatters into thousands of glass pieces as she roars in anger.

-

TO: Mako Li'ui

FROM: Theksevoy Li'ui

SUBJECT: Honeymoon.

-

I never got you your fairytale ending, and I'm so sorry. It was always 'tommorrow' or 'when we have the credits'. I'm so sorry Mako, you deserved better than me.

If I ever see you again, when I see you again, we're ditching this whole business and blasting off to the far, luxorious corners of the galaxy and living like royalty until the galaxy catches up to us or we die. Whatever happens, we do it together.

Someone in the Alliance (I'm betting it was one of the Ciphers, Nine and Twenty-Six always manage to mess me up) found our records and sent them to me.

I love you, Mako Li'ui.

-Thek

-

Everyone was afraid of the brute, Mandalore's Champion. Everyone knows his name, but not his story. No one wants to get close, to make him snap, to make him angry. The only people that have come back without a horror story to tell is the small, thin Intelligence agent. No one knows what she did for him, but he protects her with his life now.

-

TO: Torian Cadera

FROM: Ba'shira Cadera

SUBJECT: Get Away.

-

That hunting trip would've been nice, cyare. Should've taken you up on it earlier, before all this Alliance business happened. Had I not been there, I would still be with you. Hunting down the big game, bringing home the prizes with you. Spending every waking moment with my Torian.

Skinned myself a nice beast. Beasts, in fact. Without Bounty Hunting and since I haven't been able to find your Clan (our Clan, right? Never felt all that welcome), been collecting hides and such. Think you'll like 'em when you get back, cyare.

Everyday is my aay'han without you there with me,

-Shira

-

The woman is a clean shot, always. The target is never empty, and the holes never waver from the bright red target. It's terrifying, in fact. The way that if you bother her, she turns from the firing range but still shoots perfectly. It's enough to keep anyone in the Alliance from bothering the Mandalorian, even though somedays she wishes someone would continue bothering her. To keep her from thinking these horrible thoughts.

-

TO: Vector Hyllus

FROM: Rubiksi Delux-Hyllus

SUBJECT: Nests.

-

I've visited nests. I find them fascinating, and for the most part, they accept my presence. Some kinder nests enjoy my visits, though I had to leave most rather hurriedly, they wish for me to become part of their nests. I'm not sure they understand that I am human and don't wish to Join them, but they let me be.

Those of the Oroboro nest are harder to convince. They know me, and they love me. In a way different from the way you loved me, like siblings, like parents. I spent a majority of my time on Alderaan with them before the Alliance came to be...I had dark thoughts, Vector. I really believed it was time to end it all. The cliff where you saved me became my home for months on end, though every time I couldn't bear to slip off without knowing if you knew I was still alive.

So I didn't. I considered other ways of getting rid of my consciousness. Drinking has always made me nauseous, so I kept away from doing so. Bounty Hunting affected my conscience in a way I didn't think it would after everything Intelligence put me through.

I wanted to Join, Vector. I thought that if I let them absorb me into the colony, that I'd see you again. That everything would just fade away. I remember you once told me you didn't want me to either, because my individuality would be gone. I brushed you off, I'd already known that my individuality had been stripped away by the SIS and Intelligence. But, as the search continues I've accepted that this is who I am, and taking this away wouldn't make you happy.

The Alliance found me, told me Cipher Nine could help them with the fight against the Eternal Empire. I believed they were crazy for a moment there, what would a lowly Cipher do against a galaxy-spanning tyrannical ruler? They were quick to convince me that I could do a lot, and with my ties to Intelligence, it wouldn't be difficult to have a leg up in the war.

I thought if I helped them, they'd help me. They tried to, tried to find you. But they needed me every waking moment, leaving them as an ally of the Alliance made me a target. It isn't until now we've begun really searching for those lost during the war.

I was told Killiks lost a majority of their nests as well. I can't imagine how that feels, but those I built a connection to are in pain. Mutual pain is never something I wished to endure, and for now I've accepted I don't belong with the Empire anymore. My allegiance ended as soon as they used them for canon fodder.

I pray you were one of the lucky ones, Vector.

-Rubiksi

-

The most listless out of all the recruits to the Alliance, the lithe human female stares out the window, blonde, brittle hair over her shoulder as she leans against a pillar. It seems everything is too big for the woman these days, as she tries to hide herself among the crowds. A ghost of herself, the amber-eyed agent isn't sociable, and many are afraid to approach her. But, no one wants to admit they're afraid one day they'll wake up and she won't be there.

-

Some bonus letters from characters who didn't romance Bioware's LIs.

-

TO: Theron Shan

FROM: [Redacted]

SUBJECT: [Redacted]

-

Hmm..You've always been a tough one, Shan. Slippery, odd. Never really ever landed on how old you were, whether Theron or Shan was really your name. You're good at your job, I'll give you that.

I'm not going to say I'm sorry for being gone. After Yavin, [Redacted] and I had our differences. She didn't trust me, I didn't trust her. Lana was having her own issues keeping [Redacted] from doing something catastrophic, and didn't trust me not to switch sides again. I'm not apologetic for what I did, and I never will be. I look out for myself first, you three second.

But this? This is rather odd. [Redacted] is an interesting place to hide, especially among [Redacted]. Given, this has been my home for a while, and [Redacted] was easy to convince to let me stay here too. I have my ways, always. But I suggest you go back to pretty boy, think you've really struck a nerve now. But [Redacted] is going to throw a fit if you show that shaven head around her again.

-

The water front has been a nice home for the last few years as she giggles, baring her teeth as a woman wraps her hands around her waist, tickling her until she can't breathe. Though, the giggles are cut short as the Cathar woman's eyes widen, hearing them before the door breaks down. A shriek as silk flies, one look behind her and she's out the window, tumbling to the ground in little more than a sheer top and a skirt, she begins running, cursing the man's name under her breath.

-

TO: Aristocra Saganu

FROM: Scy'arla Tuvii

SUBJECT: Red Flame

-

I didn't understand what that meant until I looked into it among the other Chiss at headquarters. Once I did, you can't imagine the kind of warmth that sent. I'd only known you for a few weeks at best, but I wish I could've gotten to known you better. I know I'm little more than just a Twi'lek in most Chiss eyes, but I really did feel like I was more to you. I hope it wasn't misplaced.

We both have responsibilities past the other's knowledge. I know you're rather important to the Chiss, but I don't pry beyond that. I assume you know more about me, but I don't know how far that goes. I hope if you did learn anymore, it doesn't go much further past my objectives on Hoth with regards to Intelligence. I don't think you could see me in the same light if you knew more, I'm sorry.

Whether this reaches you or not, I'm not sure. You're busy, I'm busy. You're not like other men, I have a past I'm not ready to admit to. I'd like to extend an invitation to a suite on Dromound Kaas if you could ever get away for that long. It's beneath you, I'm sure, but think about it?

-Cy.

-

The Alliance doesn't seem to have taken the same toll on Scy'arla. The Cipher is rarely around, if at all, as a supplier. Still loyal, and frankly terrifyingly, to the Empire, she can't be relied on. The first assumption is that she is their traitor, that she has finally sold them out. But, when the time comes, her hands are clean, and everyone is left in surprise when the real traitor is outed among them. A chuckle here, an 'I told you so' there, is the all the agent leaves behind.

-

TO: [Redacted]

FROM: Darth Ezridivia Uvon

SUBJECT: You know what.

-

I know you have something to do with this. You always did have a hand in the cookie jar [Redacted]. As frustrating as it was to deal with you, I really do wonder whether you assisted Theron with this. You two were always a bit too close, though you argued all the time and butt heads even more than he and Lana did. You'd known each other for so much longer, worked together to get things done. You might've been gone for the last five years, but I just know you're behind this somehow. Theron wouldn't just do this to the Alliance.

I know someone like you, would.

-

The pureblood Sith woman paces back and forth, as her blonde comrade types away at a terminal. A grimace here, an angry monolouge there. The woman had no shortage of anger for the agent and his partner, even though she wasn't ready to admit that neither would do this without provocation. She fed off the raw emotions of shock and anger from those in the Alliance, but her nearly melancholy wife really kept her from snapping.

-

[crqstalite]

pt. 16, ancestry. ( aric && hakio)

finally got around to writing another one. i had writing block for a hot second over the last week, so that’s why this didn’t come out as soon as i would’ve liked. sorry for the continuous filler, but i did need some time to flesh out hakio’s family before continuing on (they will have a bigger part in this story, especially tyqin, who contacted thek n ba’shira)

oh, and yes. tyqin is a drag queen.

written: 9.14.19. word count: 4,235.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════ character song: liar, camila cabello

character file: hakiojkl hyperion, colonel of the republic military

-

thankfully, elara arrives only a bit before dinner, ending the embarrassing confrontation with voonie and her mother. her mother threatens to give aric a talking to before they leave, but welcomes elara with a sunny disposition. once the three of them get settled, hakio introduces them to the members of her family. voonie doesn't bother with elara, questioning aric and whatnot, but baishya and apani have the most questions for both members. darjev doesn't leave his room until dinner is called, and josie is happy to listen in for the time being.

to say the least, dinner's rather quiet between the members of havoc. the younger members of the hyperion family ask all sorts of questions, those they can't answer legally (e.g, who do they work for), those they can't answer morally (e.g, how many people have you killed), and just...rather odd questions to say the least (e.g is aric afraid of cucumbers). no one acknowledges elara's accent or heritage (a win in her book), and more or less the twins are curious about the firepower the assault cannons have.

her mother shuts down that discussion quick when their eyes light up ecstatically as hakio delves into her favorite topics, weapons. it's not that she doesn't understand why, which is why she switches the topic to less dangerous tactics, which elara leads. hakio figures it's still a shock for her mother, and still a sore spot for the rest of the family. the brewing war has taken the form of their injured daughter and sister, and having three soldiers eat dinner with them in lounges with ruler-straight backs and only a chuckle here and there, is probably bringing the mood down.

her mother won't look at her directly anymore either. as much as she hugged her and and laughed with her when she first arrived, her eyes still speak volumes. disappointment is the loudest, longing is another. anger hides behind her eyes, the quiet fire blazing as she takes everyone's plates from them, disappearing into the kitchen.

it's been too long since she's been home. everyone's changed, and she feels as if the kids she grew up with no longer know her, and she no longer knows them. they easily banter back and forth with each other, telling jokes as if the reason they're here is no big deal. like nothing's happened, like nothing's changed. like their sister isn't on leave, like she's been here this whole time.

it's disheartening to say the least. how close she and her mother used to be, through her training at the academy, through school. through her father's death, through the accident. they used to be two peas in a pod.

what happened?

"i'm here!" a loud and cheerful voice says, the front door shutting loudly as baishya and apani jump up from their seats excitedly and josie rolls his eyes, darjev making sure their mother really was gone and putting his feet up on the table. "did you all miss me?" she barely overhears.

"yes!" the girls and josie say in excitement.

"who's arrived, major?" elara asks quizzically, out of earshot of the rest of her family, eyebrows furrowing in confusion.

"i'm not sure." hakio responds, head in her hands, a headache coming on. holding her head up, she rubs her temples. "probably one of our family friends."

"nope, it's ty." darjev says, overhearing their conversation as he looks up from one of his hologames. "he's coming with us to the hospital, and against mom's better judgement, she invited him to come over for dinner. he would show up late, that's tyqin hyperion for you." darjev scoffs as josie frowns.

"tyqin doesn't mean to be late, he's just been busy lately." josie says, frowning at darjev's comment. hakio holds back a sigh, josie's protected tyqin since they were children, deflecting the blame or taking it all himself. it's admirable, but rather annoying. "maybe he has something for you, hakio!" he jumps up, and dashes out of the living room, a blur of blue. darjev lazily looks over to her.

"i'm gonna murder that man at some point." he says nonchalantly, as if he's forgotten elara and aric were sitting at the table and he was just admitting what he'd done the day prior. "push him off a balcony if i could."

"that's our brother you're talking about, darjev." hakio narrows her eyes, eyebrows furrowing. "don't go around threatening your family."

"family? tyqin hasn't been my brother for a long time, hakio." he responds dryly, grimacing as he pulls another bread roll from the basket on the table and stuffs it in his mouth. "even you know that."

hakio knows that good and well, but it still doesn't make it any better. her eldest and youngest brothers had never gotten along well, their personalities clashing hard even as children. now that they're adults, she's afraid of the fallout from years of disagreements and arguments. tykurt tended to be the middle man and break them up, but he apparently hadn't been back to the apartment in years. apani, baishya, darjev and josie were the only hyperion children that still lived in the house with her aging mother.

something about that makes her uneasy for the future. "why do you care anyways? you ran off to the military and didn't even contact us after the accident. why'd you even come back tonight?" he questions, raising an eyebrow.

"that's because i care about quinne." she answers firmly, her cheeks heating with the realization that it's true. she's been disconnected from her family for so long. it has been a long time without seeing them, and maybe she should've tried harder to come back sooner. then, it's also not her fault she's out protecting the greater galaxy and the coreworlds; as well as coruscant from galactic threats. "i'm here for her."

"good to know that you've forgotten about the rest of us." he fires back. she opens her mouth to speak again when he cuts her off, "what about the twins? mom hates that baishya wants to go into the military, apani wants to be a field medic like the imperial you brought. marli's in training right now, won't even be back until graduation. and guess what? it's all because of you. you're gonna be the reason mom lives alone, waiting until one of us gets promoted or dies to see us again."

aric and elara both stand from their seats, the aforementioned cathar muttering something about getting some air and heading towards the balcony. now alone, hakio isn't afraid to bring out some of her worse not-for-those-outside-the-family arguments. as selfish as it sounds, she's glad they're gone so that her xo and medic don't think of her any different. "and so what? obviously you and tyqin are going to be here forever, slaving away to some corporation until you pass out from heat exhaustion or smoke inhalation. if they want to follow their dreams, why do you want to stop them?" she asks, trying not to raise her voice in case those out in the foyer can hear her.

"mom already lost dad. she nearly lost quinne. she lost you. she's still holding onto what she has left. what's it gonna take for you to care about the rest of your family again?" darjev asks, crossing his arms. "one day, no one's gonna be looking out for you because they know nothing about you, nothing about where you've been, who you're friends with, what you're doing." he pauses again, watching as she changes her own stance to pick up her glass. "you haven't been my sister for a long time. don't start acting like you are again."

and with that, tyqin and his procession of hyperions enters in the dining room as her mother comes back with a towel over her left shoulder. darjev makes a beeline for the stairs, heading up to his room. all she can hear is static in her ears as she tries to stabilize herself with this realization. her blood is boiling, how can he just say that and get up and pretend nothing's changed? that what he's said doesn't hurt more than a bullet to the chest?

hakio didn't know her sisters were planning to go into the military, she hadn't even noticed her quiet sister was gone at the academy. he was right, she knew nothing about her siblings. the childish wonders they'd once all indulged in, didn't matter anymore. the dolls were traded in for dresses, the books were traded in for medical magazines, the hairties for guns.

she hadn't been the only reason for this.

"oh. my. stars." tyqin accentuates every word, shrieking in excitement as he dashes over to her, hugging her as she tries to remain upright. "my sister, a hero of the republic is finally back home!"

"good to see you too, ty." she says, trying to shake off the previous conversation and give her older brother a bear hug. he has all sorts of bags in his hands, his face painted as if he's just been at a party. and as well as he acts, he stinks of alcohol. he must've been out before he'd arrived, which while not odd, was weird he'd go partying before visiting his injured sister in a hospital.

then again, this was also tyqin hyperion. well known queen and partier on the lower levels of coruscant. "ooo, girl. i knew i snatched weaves, but where did yours go?"

"i shaved it, dumbass." she says, trying to lighten her mood as she lifts tyqin's hands from her bare head. the curly-haired male rolls his eyes as he pulls things out the bags he's carrying, laying them out on the dining room table as the younger kids' eyes widen in excitement.

"brought some things for ya'll though. sorry hakio, had i known you were coming i would've bought you something too." he says, though she knows he's not. as much as he didn't know, he probably also isn't very sorry for leaving his sister without a gift. the younger ones were always his favorites (and voonie. voonie made it clear that whenever gifts were handed out, she got something expensive too), and he was always rather stingy (even though yuvi can -and often does- pay for everything without complaint) with his purchases for other people. evident, in the new nails he has done and the way his clothes shimmer in the low light of the dining room.

"it's not that big a deal." she finally says, choosing the least argumentative response as her siblings go through their gifts. hakio doesn't make much of a note of any of them (partially because she doesn't care, partially because her mind isn't on what lifeday gifts come early they've received), and instead decides to head back up to her, aric and elara's room until it was time to leave.

"wait for a second sweetie. where are you headed?" tyqin asks, his nails just ghosting her arm as she begins up the steps, josie, apani and baishya still gushing over the expensive gifts and her mother wiping off the table. "you aren't going to be a no-show like darjev are you?"

"of course not. but if we're heading out soon i need to get dressed." she says, and hurries up the stairs so that tyqin can't say anything else. he's such an airhead sometimes, she's not concerned whether he'll remember this and question her about her behavior later.

finally upstairs, she punches in the code and enters her bedroom, where elara is sitting on her cot and reading off a datapad and aric is pacing back and forth in front of her window. both stand when she arrives, before she gives the universal sign to relax. no one speaks for a moment before elara sits back down on her cot, shutting off her datapad. "are things...alright, colonel?"

"things are fine, elara." she says softly, giving her medic a smile. "whatever happens here, stays here. we hyperions just...show love differently."

understatement of the millenia, she grumbles to herself.

"permission to speak freely?" aric growls. hakio sighs, before nodding. she wonders what has aric so riled up. "whatever business is going on between you and your family, how do you just let your brother treat you like that?"

"how much did you hear?" hakio asks, cocking an eyebrow. she's rather suspcious now, aric tended to be much more in her life than she would've liked already, which she figured was typical of someone who was trying to court you, but found that odd he would eavesdrop. it seemed rather out of character for him.

"the captain and i accidentally overheard you on the way up. our deepest apologies, sir." elara apologizes, not meeting her eyes.

"it's difficult to explain. my family's been fractured for a long time, my return home has just solidified it for some." she responds, fishing out her bag from under her bed (careful not to touch the sheets atop the mattress) and pulling out garments of clothing. "i'm going to the hospital with my family in a bit. will you two be alright alone?"

"of course, sir." elara answers, aric still grumbling somewhere behind her. the sun is just setting over the horizon, and a glance at a chrono on her wall says that it's barely early evening. chances are, they wouldn't stay long either, so maybe havoc wouldn't spend the night. "whatever you need, we're here for you."

"thank you, elara." she says, putting her civillian clothes over one arm and leaving the bedroom to change in the bathroom. as soon as she steps outside, voonie passes by and she grins mischeveously as she pockets a tube of makeup.

"that cathar is keeping you rather busy." her sister purrs as she follows her into the bathroom, the door not closing fast enough to keep the dark skinned girl out. "how many men are on the team anyways? military men are always so hot."

"none that would be after you." she deadpans. yuun? definitely not, she wasn't even sure whether gand had mates outside of their own species. tanno? hakio shivers at the thought, it could either go absolutely horridly, or worse. ryean? the poor zabrak would have a heart attack over all the skin the woman showed. if her eyes were on aric... "could i get dressed by myself, please?"

"there's something going on between ya'll, isn't there?" voonie questions again, as hakio crosses her arms. voonie moves to primp her hair a bit, slathering something over lips. the two women in the mirror don't look all that different, but the way they hold themselves is. it's like being in high school again, hakio with the baby puffs and voonie's hair flattened and relaxed. one was clearly popular, dressing nicely though she had to work for it, and the other not caring with others thought about how she dressed. "by the stars finally. thought it'd take you forever to get married. even if he is non-human." she says, an e-cigarette in hand as she blows out a stream of smoke that makes hakio cough.

"go outside with that thing. and i don't care anyways. whether i get married or not isn't any of your business. now get out and let me get dressed." she says, nearly pushing her sister out the door with more force than is probably necessary.

"hmph." is all she can say, brushing her hair away from her shoulder and turning away from the bathroom. rolling her eyes, she pulls off her shirt before sticking the next one. however, she catches a glimpse of all the scars on her chest, and the muscles that came along with them.

she can't imagine what life would be like if she never left the apartment. she wouldn't look like this, that's for sure. maybe she'd be closer to her siblings and her mother. but she wouldn't have had the same experiences, nor would she know what she knows now. she wouldn't know aric, elara, forex, tanno, yuun, ryean or synntai.

but was it worth it? the accident with the junkers, being drafted into havoc squad? the betrayal?

for once in her life, hakio isn't sure.

-

"my dear, baby sister." quinne says hoarsely, coughing a bit as hakio comes to sit by her bedside. quinne shuffles to sit up, a grim smile on her face as she visibly winces. "finally, you've come to see me."

"i'm sorry, quinne. i've been so busy with havoc-" she says, before her eldest sister cuts her off with a finger to her lips.

"so talkative. nothing's changed. i know you're busy, hakio. and that's alright. you're saving the galaxy one battle at a time, and i admire that so much." she says, her dark brown eyes glittering in the white light of the hospital's room. "i wish i'd gone into the military all those years ago. unmarried, without kids."

"but you still love them, right?" hakio asks, a little nervous with the wistful tone her sister's voice was becoming. she has three kids and a husband, so this is rather odd. "you're representing the republic as a senator anyways. you do more than i do."

"that's kind of you, hakio. as much as i'd like to take that compliment, it's not true. i'm more a figurehead than anything else." her face scrunches up in pain as she stops talking for a moment before shaking it off, "sorry, the painkillers haven't been working for a while."

"don't be sorry. this wasn't your fault." and that's enough to get her blood boiling again. this was never quinne's fault, and she shouldn't have to say sorry for being in pain while her family visits. "i'm bringing whoever did this to you to justice."

"oh, hakio please. don't do anything stupid." she takes her hands in hers, trying to calm her down. "what happened, happened. it's like when darjev and tyqin used to fight. whatever the issue was didn't matter the day after, and on a grander scale, that's all this is. whoever shot me will forget about it later."

"that's...not how war works, sis." she says. the bandage wrapped around her chest is proof enough. the imperials weren't just going to give up because one person told them to stop. in fact, that'd make it worse. "the empire will just keep fighting, and i have to be there to stop them."

"then do just that. fight the battles, win the war. whatever you have to do. then you can come back and settle down with the rest of us." quinne says, smiling, "little hakios running around here and there. what a thought."

"sure." hakio says. as much of a wish that is for voonie, her mother and quinne, to say the least hakio isn't interested in settling down. the empire isn't going to roll over when she says 'i do' to someone. the republic will never be safe, and she can't exactly chase after agents if she can't see her own feet. "maybe." she answers uneasily.

"or not." quinne makes a movement to shrug, but winces instead. "my soldier baby sister probably doesn't want to step away from the frontlines, huh?"

hakio finally looks up at her face, really looks at her. quinne hasn't been a young adult for a long time, but for some reason she looks much older than she should. the way she smiles, the way her skin crinkles around her eyes. she's not sixteen anymore, and she's really someone else now. she's the senator of a whole planet now, she's the mother of three and a loving wife. and a doting sister as she rubs her head. "just don't forget how fragile life is. i attended one funeral for a hyperion killed in action. i'm not attending one for you too."

"long as you don't die first." hakio says, and quinne smiles. standing from her chair, she stretches her arms over her head, yawning. it's been a bit, and she was the last one to come in. it must be dark by now. she might as well take elara and aric out for a bit, it'd be late and there wouldn't be as many attendants at the spaceport. as much as she should spend time with her family, everyone is looking sleepy. being in space and on different planets so often makes her a little off the r.s.t time zones, hence why she isn't exhausted right now. "guess i'll be going, quinne."

"alright. i won't let my colonel of a sister get too caught up with little old me." she says, shuffling back into a position to lay down. "don't be a stranger."

"'course." hakio says, waving as the door closes behind her. letting out a sigh, she heads down the hall back to the waiting room. her family heads outside, chattering between each other as darjev ignores the others, and voonie continues quizzing her about her state of affairs with the men on her ship. when they return to the apartment, hakio is exhausted by answering question after question. her room is surprisingly quiet when she returns, and under closer inspection, elara has fallen asleep on her cot with her datapad in hand. slowly taking it from her so she doesn't wake her friend, she shuts it off and puts it on her desk, and puts the spare blanket on over her. at least that way she won't freeze through the night.

"hakio?" aric asks, sitting up on her bed. "didn't know when you'd be back, and elara passed out a while ago."

"she's been working since before i left. maybe we should all go out tomorrow, relax a bit." hakio suggests, turning on the shade to her window so that the skyline of coruscant can't see inside her room. "what've you been up to? not snooping around my childhood bedroom, i hope." she smirks as aric chuckles.

"i'd never. your mom actually talked both our ears off and gave us the leftovers from dinner. she's sweet." he responds, "she told us about your family, your dad. she let it slip she doesn't want you in the military anymore."

"i'm not surprised." her voice quiets as she sits next to her second in command, her head hanging. "as much as she wants it, this is who i am. i'm not sure i'm ready to give it up, whether my family loves me more or less because of it. i guess i lost sight of making them proud when i got drafted into havoc."

"don't apologize for wanting to make a difference. you're protecting the republic. sure i understand why they're upset, but that's on them. you can either bend to their will doing something you'd never be happy slaving away at, or you can do something that you would do for the rest of your life with no questions." aric responds. "you can't do anything about how others feel. whether you want to settle down or not, that isn't their decision to make."

"i..guess you're right." hakio responds. possibly he'd also been through this decision in his past. maybe his parents had also been hard on him. cathars did tend to mate for life, as she'd learned. maybe his family had been looking for him to marry better than they did. "if you weren't a soldier, what would you be doing, aric?"

"i don't know. this has always been me." he pauses as if he's thinking. "what about you?"

"you probably already know from the conversation at the dinner table. i was supposed to take over my dad's repair shop. tyqin and voonie used to apprentice there, and since i was the least girlish of the family, he figured i would've liked it. then he died while i was away, and the shop went through foreclosure. by then, i knew i wasn't coming back to coruscant, and my family knew i was the only one that didn't visit anymore. they didn't bother asking me to come back anymore." she frowns. it's all true, maybe if she'd stayed things wouldn't be the way they were now. maybe her dad would still be alive. maybe things would be the way they used to be.

aric seems to read her mind and uneasy thoughts as he puts his hand over hers. "it all depends on what you want to do, hakio. are you happy with havoc?"

"more than anything. i like protecting those who can't protect themselves." she answers firmly, staring back into his emerald green eyes.

"then that's all that matters." he says, as she smiles. for real this time.

"thank you, aric." she says, tipping his head just a bit as he looks confused before she kisses him. standing before he can do anything else, she looks over her shoulder slyly as she grabs her lounges from earlier. "i'll be back, i'm going to get a shower."

"y-yeah." he responds, "i'll be here."

"i hope so." she giggles, stepping over elara's sleeping form, the door closing behind her.

as much as she hates the idea of retiring, maybe being...lifemates with aric(that's what he called it, right?) wouldn't be so bad. well, if he likes her like that. her real emotions have only just emerged, it'd be a shame if he didn't feel the same.

but...hakiojkl jorgan does have a nice ring to it.

by the stars, now she was thinking like voonie, she though angrily as she turned the scalding water on. finding quinne's attacker first, aric later.

[crqstalite]

drabble, resignation (aric && hakiojkl)

originally intended to be a short drabble on why hakio couldn’t put up with aric in the early days of havoc squad, and then sprouted into an explanation of her backstory with ‘the junkers’ when she was younger. for some reason, i like giving my characters a real reason to be so tough, or act that way at least. for hakio, it’s because she doesn’t want to be caught unaware anymore.

god, this trooper is going to be the death of me. as well as this chapter, because i cringed as i wrote some of aric’s crueler lines. i pray to the swtor gods i can be forgiven.

written : 7.6.19. published to tumblr : 7.6.19. word count : 3,167

tw : ptsd, anxiety attacks.

════ ⋆★⋆ ════

“a good record doesn’t make a good leader.”

rookie, brat. she’s heard everything from that man (at least she thinks so) and it’s driving her up the walls of the thunderclap. whether her newest addition, elara can tell, she doesn’t know. the ex-imperial keeps to herself, and it seems like whenever hakio even steps outside the little line of expectations that aric has for her, it’s a snide comment here, an offhanded comment there.

it gets to her.

and she’s this close to snapping. she hates how he’s so blunt about his thoughts too, not even hiding how much he’s annoyed by her position. on one hand, she can understand. maybe this position was for him. maybe he should’ve earned it instead of her.

but it’s hers now, and she doesn’t know whether he can tell, but she’s working her damned ass off trying to do her best.

has she ever run a crew? no, hell no. she didn’t intend to leave ord mantell as a lieutenant either, but it happened, and aric hasn’t been able to discuss, and it’s pissing her off to hell and back. she’s never been good with her emotions, always on a short fuse. and leaving her with someone else with a short fuse is not a good mix. one of them is going to set the other off, and she doesn’t know who it’s going to be.

not to mention her anxiety is getting worse. shaving her hair before arriving on ord was a big enough change, one that scared the shit out of her as a woman with no hair (voonie said it made her look proud of her cyborg modifications and very strong and brave), how the others at the outpost would regard her. but running havoc squad, as it’s CO? that’s banking on sending her over the edge, as it all gets worse. nights she spends awake because she can’t breathe, reliving those weeks she spent half-concious receiving her cyborg modifications, and then being in the hospital.

and the tanker.

oh god-

“hey hakio, whatcha thinkin’ about?” she turns her head to the miraluka private, who grins at her as he shifts the rifle in his lap. “got that thinkin’ look on your face.”

“goin’ home next week, private. gonna see my brother and his baby, then my sister and her new husband.” she responds, retying her hair into a ponytail. originally she’d worn it in it’s natural afro, but it was getting hot around her neck and shifted too much against her helmet. “miss em’ like hell.” she responds as she puts the helmet back on.

“of course, everyone does.” he rubs his goatee as he mulls over his own thoughts. “goin’ home to my wife in a couple a weeks. merla’s gonna have my twins.”

“congrats, oz.” she says. ozy was one of her favorites in their small squad, even if he was older than her. she had her mother and father, but no uncles or aunts, and while she was still in basic training, ozy filled that roll. hearing his stories about his pregnant wife, who was due when they return. she was already planning to head home to her family, meet persie (tyqin’s new baby boy), and then head out to meet ozy’s twins, and merla. he looked out for her, told her what she needed to train for, what she needed to study on. only reason she passed basic training and made it through the academy was because of him. “i’ll be down there a week after i get home.”

“‘course, you gotta take care of yourself too, sergeant. merla makes it sound like m'babies are taking their time.” he chuckles, before turning back to her. “you take your time to, maybe find you a man to calm you down a bit.”

she doesn’t hear anything just as she opens her mouth to laugh at what he says, and the tanker hits something. not until later does she find out what it is, but that scene will forever be burned into her memory. the laughing face of private ozy grell seconds before disaster.

a loud rap at the cockpit door makes her jump out of her seat, hand going for her blaster before realizing it’s the last person she wants to see at that moment. heart racing, she slides it back in it’s holster on her hip, standing rigid as she tries to calm herself. “sergeant.”

“lieutenant.” he says. “we were supposed to be planetside half an hour ago, you forget?”

“no, i didn’t.” she did. sometimes she got to thinking, trying to calm one panic attack and gaining another. she’s stifling tears, thinking about how ozy had never met his twins, but she did. merla and her stayed in contact in the early days, but one day she didn’t return her calls, and hakio gave up trying after she was transferred to ord mantell. “just let me get my gear and we’ll head out, jorgan.”

“dorne and i have been ready to go. just waiting on you, as always.”

the as always grits against her already bruised skin. she tries to ignore it, but after yet another attack, she can’t. she just can’t. she’s too far gone now to do so, and she just wants to be left alone at this point. private grell, sergeant hyperion, lieutenants young and varz. commander tavarii. all assumed dead until they found her, half alive underneath the rubble, clinging to life.

commander lunar tavarii. a twi'lek woman who didn’t take shit from everyone, the one who had to keep ozy from giving her the answers, had to make her find things out herself. taught her how to shoot at point blank range, made her into the soldier she’d was today.

still had the same blaster the commander gave her weeks before the accident. spraypainted purple, the same color as her skin. had their sigil engraved into the handle of it.

hakio ran her fingers over it as often as she picked it up.

offered her some consolation.

“lieutenant?” jorgan’s voice snaps her out of her thoughts. “do you just want me to take dorne planetside for this mission, if you can’t do it yourself?”

he must be far enough away that he can’t see she’s breathing hard, heart almost beating out of her chest as her anxiety rises in her throat. she’s panicking, having a full-blown attack now and it’s scaring her. this isn’t the first time she’s hand an attack since arriving on the thunderclap, but the first time it’s even been this bad. first time jorgan would ever see her trying to recover from one.

and hell, he’s not helping with his stupid comments.

you’re not good enough anyways. why keep trying to prove yourself to the likes of him? you’ll never be good enough for him anyways. it’s just a matter of time before he’s your CO.

“hakio, please. i don’t want you getting hurt.” her mother buries her in her shirt, hugging her like her life depends on it. “promise me you’ll be careful and stay out of harm’s way.”

“can’t promise that mom. i have a duty to the republic now.” she adjusts her formal wear, trying to keep it from creasing before she leaves for graduation. “promise you i’ll always come home though.”

“all in one piece, i hope.” her dad crushes her in another hug, essentially ruining her hair, but she hugs him back with just as much raw strength. “can’t half you walkin’ around on one of these on your wedding day.” he refers to his missing left leg, cheekily smiling as she grins back.

“alright dad. i’ll promise that.”

she couldn’t even keep that promise. now he’s gone, he’d never walk her down the metaphorical and physical aisle, handing her off to someone, making them promise to take care of her when he was gone-

“lieutenant. you can have your personal moments on your own time. we’re on a schedule here.”

she’s done. something snaps in her as she whirls around from where she was previously standing to gather her things from the weapon locker, sliding her rifle back to wear it had been in the gun stand. “you’ve just got nothing good to say, do you sergeant? every damned comment, every sly remark and retort. i don’t know whether you hear yourself when you talk, but you’re a fucking asshole.”

she can’t bring herself to raise her voice at him. tavarii never did, and she doesn’t intend to either. but something about his face changes as tears begin pouring down her face. she can’t stop it, all the memories are flooding back too quickly, seeing their families, realizing their soldiers weren’t coming back. their wives, husbands, fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers.

their families.

when merla was by her bedside, trying not to cry as she told her about the twins, hakio unable to speak. a girl and a boy, at least six or seven by now. at least she thinks. hakio tries her best not to think about the time in between now and then.

that she’d been the only one to survive. “you want my position? take it. fucking take it because i’m not putting up with you anymore.”

her helmet goes rolling across the floor as she pushes past him, dashing past c2-n2 to leave without dorne or jorgan. she’s breaking down, she knows that she is as she heads out into the spaceport. she has nowhere to go, she hasn’t even contacted garza yet to let her know they’ve landed.

well, jorgan would. she knows that he would. just as fast as her promotion arrived, it’d be taken from her.

maybe she’d just resign.

stars knows jorgan would be pleased to run havoc without her.

-

“is she usually like this, sergeant?” dorne asks as he picks up her helmet. dented by the throw, but she’d received it on ord mantell, only taking it off once or twice in the field to cool off. it’s still in pristine condition, surprising by all the firefights they’ve been in with her wearing it. “is she an angry person by nature?”

“no. she’s not.” he holds back a growl. he’s not angry with dorne, and he’s not angry with hyperion either. maybe, he has been too harsh.

“ran with the junkers a bit.” she patches herself up, wrapping a bandage around her exposed bicep, ripping off what she doesn’t need with her teeth. she pauses, looking at the roll of bandages like it holds some sentimental meaning to her. “…just got there as a private two years before the accident. got transferred over, got promoted to sergeant while i was there.”

he knows a little about the junkers. never crossed paths with them (the deadeyes often ran missions alone), but always heard good things about what they did on balmorra and corellia. only big thing that he’d heard before their dissolvement was that there was an accident, one that hyperion had been part of. “only survivor after the explosion.”

aric’s curious. he thought they’d dissolved after the accident, not that hyperion had been the only survivor of said accident. “never forgave myself after that but…can’t dwell on the past i guess.” she turns to him over her shoulder, throwing on her undershirt and moving to pick up the pieces of her armor. “let’s get going sergeant, hoping to find needles by life day.”

she’s a strong woman, she shows that time and time again. saved him more times than he can count on his fingers and toes, and is a frightening shot with both a blaster and a rifle. the way hyperion throws herself out there is terrifying, and inspiring.

but, he was beginning to see the chinks in her armor. how loud sounds when they weren’t in battle terrified her, how he’d get up early and find her slumped over in the pilot’s chair with a datapad in hand. sometimes, she seems to go for days without eating anything, how she’d always have hands running on her modifications when she was thinking. the zr-57 on ord mantell, it hadn’t seemed like a big issue in the beginning, but the more he thinks about it, the more he realizes hyperion didn’t have a firm grasp on the situation. she’d ask question after question about the specifics, the radius of damage, what wiring ran through it. she wanted to know because she was comparing it to the bomb that had killed the junkers.

he was beginning to realize that maybe his CO didn’t have it all together, even though she tried time and time again to show that she did. aric himself recognized from his previous team that she was experiencing a form of ptsd.

“this is none of my business, i’m sorry. but sergeant, you may want to talk to her when she returns. she’s not alright.”

“i can see that, dorne.” he says, a growl escaping him anyways. rubbing his temples, he sets the helmet down on the holoterminal. “well, she won’t be back for a while, so whatever you need to get done, do it now.”

“yes, sir.” she nods curtly and heads back to the med bay. the more he looks at the helmet, the more he realizes he’s messed up. that what he’s been doing isn’t right, and it’s clearly taken it’s toll on her. he’d done his research on the accident. the bomb that had taken out the junkers’ tanker hadn’t been anything near the zr-57, but strong enough to immobilize a republic tanker. done by imperials, he figured. hyperion must’ve know everything to know about that bomb.

is he still jealous? yes, quite a bit in fact. the position should’ve been his. but, hyperion’s molded to the role. the way she checks on dorne and he before tending to her own wounds, even after only a couple of fights on the way back to the ship. the way she’s awake until he and dorne have settled down, the way she makes sure they have their things before retreating to her private quarters.

she’s social with dorne. spent a good deal of time talking to her after acquiring her on taris, one of the few smiles hyperion’s ever graced him with. well, graced anyone other than him with. it’s been as icy as hoth between them since they left ord mantell.

this might be her tipping point.

and he doesn’t know whether she’s coming back or not. dorne seems to just accept it, but knowing what he knows about hyperion, he’s concerned she may not walk back through the ship doors. but why does he care so much all of a sudden? this is what he was waiting for, a chance to demote her and become CO again.

but, something about the scarred lieutenant makes that feel sour just as the thoughts cross his mind. it just feels…well wrong. he shouldn’t wish that on her. she’s worked hard, just trying to impress him even. but he ignores it, in favor of finding every little issue she’s ever had, every little mistake she’s ever made.

which is why when it’s late at night, and he hears the familiar shink of the door leading to the outside of the thunderclap, he stands up a bit straighter in the weapons locker, finishing up with her rifle. cleaned and outfitted with a couple of mods he had lying around, he hadn’t even realized he’d been working so late. dorne had already had a round through the 'fresher and had an mre by herself by this time.

her steps are light, even weighed down by durasteel boots. peeking out of the small armory, she’s not even looking up at him, holding herself up by the wall of the ship. it seems she can’t make it any further by herself, because she slides down the wall and buries her face in her hands. he figures dorne wouldn’t hear it, probably sleep by now, but his heightened hearing picks up on her soft sobbing. she would hate for anyone to see her like this, he’s met other soldiers like her. they never do, but any comfort from him would make it worse.

but he knows her better than dorne does. and while he doesn’t know what makes her tick (other than him), he figures he’s better than nothing.

scratching off a letter to her, he picks out an mre. when she disappears to her quarters, he leaves it outside her door and knocks softly. maybe she wouldn’t find it until the next morning, but…

well, it was the little things, he figures as he lies awake in the shared quarters, falling asleep to the sound of dorne’s soft breathing across from him.

-

hyperion-

you fell asleep before you came back to eat. nothing special, and i know you probably dislike me after this afternoon, but take care of yourself. can’t get yourself worked up over me if you can’t stand on your own two feet.

-jorgan.

she drags herself out of bed when she hears the knock. from how soft it is, she figures it’s dorne. there’s a note left with the mre, so as she goes to prepare it, she reads it through blurred eyes. she’s not sure whether someone forced him to write this as an apology, but it lifts her mood a bit.

she considers resigning again. it was the only thing on her mind today. she didn’t even end up leaving the spaceport, she just climbed until she couldn’t get down in her current state, right on the top of the thunderclap. nar shaddaa’s lights taunted her from outside, but she’d hate to be seen like this by anyone. within or outside of havoc.

hakio doesn’t think she could handle seeing jorgan again after the afternoon. she’s embarassed herself so badly, and stars is this going to haunt her everyday until she dies.

but as she picks at the ready-made meal, she considers it. leaving it all behind? and what for? to sit around with nothing but a target to shoot at and no way to express herself as a senator’s sister?

she scribbles a letter back in her loopy script, and padding into the weapons locker, she stashes the paper in between her rifle and his.

-

jorgan-

i don’t just forget to eat. though, i am grateful for your concern over my health.

i assure you this won’t happen again.

-hyperion.

he finds the card nestled in the weapons locker the morning after. she has better handwriting than he’s ever given her credit for, but as they head out the next morning, he pulls her aside while dorne is gathering her things.

“something out of line again, sergeant?” she raises an eyebrow, crossing her arms over her chest. same sass, but puffier eyes, which the the worst case scenario, makes her look sadly pathetic.

“no. just…blast it, glad you’re back, lieutenant. thought i’d have to run havoc myself.” the words spill out of him unintentionally, but the hardened look in her eyes lifts for a moment.

“oh.” she tries not to make eye contact with him, but mutters a 'thank you.’ when dorne returns from the medbay and they head off into the bowels of the smuggler’s moon.

[crqstalite]

( ANGEL WITH A SHOTGUN )

As most eventually come to realize, you can not always point a blaster at things and win. But as these three tend to also realize, anything can be shot, and that they also don’t care. Galactic superpower, God or superweapon, Khaak, Hakio and Ba’shira will stand up to it all with a nice gift to Zakuul -- from Czerka, of course.