And The Two Shall Become One
Note on the text: I used Hallaj: Poems of a Sufi Martyr as translated by Carl W Ernst and published in 2018 by Northwestern University Press
I saw the Lord with the eye of my heart,/ and he said ‘who are you?’ I said, ‘You’ (54).
I am the one that I desire, the one that I desire is I./ We are two spirits dwelling in a single body./ So when you have seen me you have seen him,/ and when you have seen him you have seen us (176).
Imagine having a God that loves you so much that he cannot bear to be separated from you. A God who loves you so much that he is constantly seeking to become one with you. A God whose love for his creation is so overwhelming he cannot permit himself to be separated from it in any way. That is the type of God that we have, at least according to the 10th century Sufi mystic and poet Hallaj.
Love is the greatest unifying force that the world has ever known. Love binds people together in ways that nothing else can. It says in the Bible that when two people fall in love and get married that the “two shall become one” (Genesis 2:24). The deeper one’s love is for another person, the truer that statement becomes. In Arabic there’s a saying which (roughly) translates to “our kids are our hearts walking around”. Again there’s that theme of unity, that there are people that you can lovely so intensely that they become part of you. According to Hallaj, God’s love for his creation, and for us in particular, is also that intense. He loves his creation so much that he, in some sense, wants us to become one with him.
If I sought the East, in the East you would be its East,/ and if I sought the west you would be right in front of me./ And if I sought above, then above it you would be above,/ and if I sought below, you are [in] every place. . . . You are where all is [and] you are in all without ever fading,/in my heart, my spirit, my mind, my thought (82).
There is no place where God is not. God is everywhere. He’s not just in church. He’s everywhere. He is in the trees, in the sunlight, in every drop of rain. He is in you. He’s in me. Those who go looking for God only need to look around them because “reality has already manifested” his presence (112). We cannot escape him anymore than the fish can escape the ocean: “you truly are my companion by day/and after dark you are my everlasting friend” (69). He’s there all around us all the time: nourishing us, loving us, waiting patiently for us to love him back. And he doesn’t just know us in a general sense but in a very specific one. He knows our innermost being. As Hallaj says: “he is nearer to my conscience than my thought”. That’s a beautiful way of saying that he is as near to me as I am to myself.
Now the question is, why does he want to be that close to us? Why does he want to get to know us so intimately? Why should he care so much about us?. And the answer is because God loves us just that much. As Hallaj says at one point about God: “I have a lover whose love is inside of me” (54). So the question then becomes, what are we to do in the face of such overwhelming love?
Give ourselves over to it, surrender to it. Take the leap and jump. Jump into the most loving relationship with God that you can. Really commit yourself and give yourself over to it. Any reason to love God is a good reason, and anything you do because of that love is a good thing:
critic, don’t blame my longing for him,/ for if you saw him as I do, you would not blame./ There are some who circle the Ka’ba without the use of limbs;/ If they circled God they’d no longer need a shrine. . . . The people have their pilgrimage, but I have a pilgrimage to my rest./ They’re offering are animals, while my heart and blood are offered (101).
Those who give themselves completely over in this loving relationship with God don’t need to seek him elsewhere because they know that he is in their heart. Some people have to go outside of themselves to find God, but for others their love of God burns so strongly that they don’t need to go anywhere else. They give themselves over to that love and let that love be their guide through life. They fuse themselves so thoroughly to God by giving themselves over to him in love that they, in some sense, become one with him: “You’ve turned my limbs from every other purpose,/ so that all of me is with you” (162) in doing so they become something more than what they were before. They become one with the Divine.
You don’t have to look far to find God. He’s all around you, calling to you, inviting you into a loving relationship. He has loved you since the moment you were conceived and he has been waiting for you to decide to love him. To unite with him in a kind of metaphysical matrimony. To share a love with him that is truly one of a kind. What a loving and amazing God he is.