Affinity Chapter 4
A/N: Oh my goodness, I've been so negligent with my baby! I'm so sorry!!! Jenn, Dawn, you two were so good to me through this chapter! <3 Thank you!!!
Muse, this is the first step! It's so exciting to see our plans start to take shape! Love you babes!!!
Megan stared at the letter in shock. Oh god she did it. She was invited to the brand new, prestigious genetics program the Institute just opened on their New England campus. No application for review necessary. Her heart jumped in her chest in delight. She was going to make her papa so proud. Oh, if Dante were here to see this! Her smile drooped and she shoved the wishful thought away by immersing herself in the packet they sent her. The curriculum was exactly what she wanted to study, genetic research and theory in relation to medicine! This was fantastic! She sat up and started filling out the paperwork, absorbing the information and communicating excitedly with her papa while she worked.
‘Thank you for the invitation papa! I got the packet today! We’ll be studying together finally!’ Megan giggled excitedly in her father’s mind. The easy communication they had had since she was a small child gave her a sense of connection that tethered her to life. She didn’t feel adrift or lost when she was talking with her papa. Same with Dante. Megan suddenly had to scramble to make sure none of the anxiety and sadness spilled over into her father’s mind as they overwhelmed her. She gritted her teeth and focused on shoving the oppressive feelings back into the box she kept them in. Visualize a chest, shove them in, lock the box. But sometimes they fought back and she couldn’t control the memories and ideas.
Would these classmates be just as miserable and draining? Would she get mocked here too? Too smart to fit in. Ostracized because of her previous degree. Taunted because of her budding curves compared to the women in the classes with her. She bit her lip to fight back the frustrated tears and keep her mind calm so her father didn’t catch on. She would never want to worry him with her silly issues and ridiculous fears. There was no solution to them that she could find, so why should she bother anyone with them. They wouldn’t be able to figure it out either.
‘Congratulations, baby girl! I’m so proud of you! You did that all on your own! You were on the top of everyone’s list to invite.’ Aaron murmured in her mind and she beamed, the tears pooling in her eyes. She made her papa happy, she made him proud. She stopped to control her breathing and push back her relieved tears. Crying was pointless but it felt so good to make something of herself for her papa. The other students didn’t matter. This was for her papa and for Dante. For the two who mattered most in her life, she would be the youngest applicant and the first in her class. They expected no less from her.
Papers crinkled under her palms as she braced herself on the bed to breathe through the nausea at the thought of letting her father down. Her father, the pioneer of genetic research, and the field that gave the Institute its start and eventual prestige in scientific advancement were both counting on her. She took a deep, shaky breath and looked at the packet. Could she do this?
This was where the fame of the Institutes started. Where they got their footing in scientific research. Their genetics building took up an entire city block in the city the Institute had created for its campus. And she was going to be able to stand where her father did when he started his career. Now she was starting her journey. After her schooling was complete they were going to offer her a job. It was her dream come true to work along side her father in a research setting. Truly perfection.
Determination welled up in her and her jaw clenched. It was no longer a matter of if she could, but how long it would take her. Megan gave herself seven years maximum to explore every route this program was giving her. By that time Dante would be finished with his Director training and she would have her best friend back and her papa would be happy in his program and she could consider virology after genetics.
She sifted through the other envelopes. None from Dante. She gave a short frustrated huff of breath as the weight settled on her chest again. So much for hoping there would be one today. She hadn’t heard from him in a month. He’d left a few days after graduation for a private polishing school that was part of his family tradition with the promise he'd write and email and call. He didn’t do any of those often. Not that she blamed him, school was much more important.
Megan knew he’d get his degree and come back but the waiting was terrifying. What if he decided not to come back? To travel to a different part of the country or the world? Megan rubbed her sternum as her heart ached and she wanted to cry. It didn’t make sense. She didn’t understand the intensity she feeling. Why would that thought make her have such an irrationally strong reaction? Oh well, she had an essay to do for her application.
~
Dante dropped onto her balcony silently and slid the door open. Megan sat curled up in her office chair, typing away on some document. The floor creaked and he winced. So much for surprising her. He smirked as he had to dodge a lamp that came flying at his head. He caught the light fixture and laughed. She hadn’t even stopped working! Just threw the lamp at him until she could finish her thought in the essay. “I would have called had I known you were going to try and brain me.”
Megan whirled in her chair to see the tall, lean young man standing in her room. “Dante.” Megan murmured his name like a benediction and he felt all was right in his world again. She wrapped her arms around his waist in a hug and rested her head on his chest. “Why didn’t you write?” She whispered before she could stop herself. She waited breathlessly for the answer, fighting back those irrational tears. He did come back to her. He didn’t leave her alone!
“I’m sorry, Megs. Finals got really crazy.” Dante tossed the lamp onto her bed and hugged her close. She felt so delicate now with his new awareness of his strength. Like she was a little kitten and he had to be careful or he would break her. He watched as the lamp floated back into its original space without Megan having to look at it. She was greatly improving, he mused. “I missed you.” He took a long calming breath of her citrus and ginger perfume and smiled. He was home.
“Don’t ever leave me again.” Megan grouched at him and he looked torn. She saw he wanted to stay, but his dedication to his family and their traditions ran just as strong. Her heart broke a little. She couldn’t make him promise her that, even if she needed it. “I know it was a ridiculous promise. I just feel so alone without you.” She admitted, baring a little of her fear to him.
“Silly goose, I won’t leave you unless I have to.” He smiled and laughed softly, wrapping her up in a hug again. He rested his cheek on her hair, closing his eyes and savoring her giggle. “What about your papa?” Dante asked as he rocked her back and forth in his arms.
Megan sighed and shrugged. “Papa’s always there but he’s been so busy lately starting up our new program. I don’t want to bother him. Besides, I have my own work to do. I might be applying for a doctorate program soon.” She always hated pulling her father away from his work. He never faulted her for it but he was so much more useful to the world if he was busy figuring out if it was possible to identify the genetic markers that could guarantee a person Alzheimers than watching some silly action movie with her because she was lonely.
“Your new program?” Dante acted puzzled and inside a ball of tension eased. she was going to accept the course. Excellent. He pulled away to look at the vivacious girl he counted as his best friend. She had grown up over the past three years. He couldn’t call her a girl anymore. Megan was definitely growing into a beautiful young woman. He pulled his thoughts away from the soft feminine curves that pressed against him and focused them back on her statements from earlier. She was his best friend, he would not objectify her like that. His brow furrowed when he realized she really missed him. More than he anticipated or expected, thinking she’d have fun in her classes and have something to occupy her mind with. Apparently not. He took a step back to look at her, and assess her expression more intently and used his telekinesis to slide the balcony door closed and lock it.
“You’ve been practicing too!” Megan grinned up at him and he smiled back just as mischievously. “I’ve been invited to the New England Institute for an inaugural class. Papa is teaching. I intend to accept.”
“I’m going to the New England Institute too!” Dante looked surprised. “I’ve got some last units of training and a visit with my mom’s family before I head over. How long is your program?” Dante watched her walk to the letter and blew out a shaky breath. Since when had his best friend looked that good in jeans?
“Here.” Megan turned and handed him the packet before flopping down on her bed and smiling up at him. “So tell me how it went!” She gasped and curled excitedly around a pillow, staring up at him like he was a new person. He seemed to have grown about six inches, putting him at six foot three, Megan paused, and three quarters. She traced her eyes down his body curiously noting the other physiological changes she had read about in books but not actually been able to see a before and after on the same subject.
How curious, most adolescent males when they grow that much look lanky, muscles unable to keep up with bones, and stretched out until the growing ceased, then they would build mass. He actually appeared to have put on more muscle mass than he had the probability of doing before graduation. He had excellent muscle tone from the looks of it, so he would have lost body fat as well. Megan shook herself slightly, Dante was not a study for her to stare at! He was her best friend. He would not appreciate such clinical observations. Though he did look tired and stressed and that worried her immensely. From a purely clinical perspective, the body can only take so much before it starts to wear out.
“So you plan on accepting, right? Because the second packet says you and your papa’s condo is in the same block as mine.” Dante grinned and Megan’s face lit up. “I won’t be available much but something tells me neither will you.”
“Oh Dante this is going to be so great!” Megan launched up on her knees and smiled at him. “I’m finishing this semester with my degree and then I’m going to move there this summer. But tell me how your school went!” Megan pulled him down to sprawl on her bed and she sat next to him, looking expectantly at him.
Dante stared at her and she smiled, nodding excitedly for him to tell her. “It went really well. I graduated the top of my class.” He started. He couldn’t tell her much, how could he tell her he went to an elite assassin training with his cousins his age? “We had a pretty high dropout rate.” Only two thirds of the trainees made it to the Gauntlet testing. Only half of those candidates, made it through the Gauntlet.
“No way! Well that makes your top of the class marks even more important!” Megan gave him a light tap in the shoulder with her fist. “Well what degree did you get?”
“I got a degree in physics and a personal trainer certification.” Dante snickered at her small frown before she laughed at their inside joke. The trainees did earn bachelor's degrees if they wanted to between their training, with private tutors and Institute backing. “From the Edinburgh Institute’s satellite program, magna cum laude with honors.” Dante murmured, the pride lit up her face and he grinned in response.
“With honors, Dante that’s so fantastic! Maybe you can drag papa and I out of the lab occasionally and work us out. I’m sure going to need a trainer.” Megan grinned and patted her curved hip jokingly.
Dante smiled slightly. “I’d be happy to but it won’t be because of you needing it. I think working out with you would be fun.” He tugged on a curl and she grinned as it sprang back into its original shape. He loved pulling the curls and watching them bounce back into place. It amused him when they were children and it made her smile.
Megan laughed and hugged him as he laid on her bed. She sighed happily and rested her cheek on his chest comfortably. “I missed this.” She whispered. When she couldn’t sleep he would sneak over and curl up with her and they would talk until she was finally able to fall asleep. She didn’t feel so alone during those moments.
Dante picked up a long lock of hair to wind around his finger and sighed quietly. “Me too.”
“How long are you here?” Megan gasped, head popping up to see him starting to doze. She bit her lip as the guilt made her wince, poor guy looked wiped out. His warm, slightly rough hand cupped her cheek and pushed her head back down on his chest. “Dante?” She asked curiously, nuzzling her cheek into his chest and waited for her answer.
“Shh, nap now. I’m exhausted. I’m here for five days then I have to go to New England Institute.” He murmured, the warm weight of her on his chest and her comfortable bed slowly sapped his strength and he fell asleep.
~
“Dante! Dante wake up, papa brought us pizza.” Megan whispered in his ear, her own sleepy tone made him smile slightly.
“I’m up. Yeah. Up.” He opened his eyes and glanced outside. Nighttime. “How long was I out?”
“Five and a half hours. I slept just as long. Papa checked on us and ordered pizza.” Megan chattered happily as she sat up and shook out her curls and Dante laughed slightly as they poofed off the side of her head. “Oh shut up.” Megan groused and Dante just chuckled and sat up slightly.
“Sorry, you’re just such a cute poodle.” He teased, grinning at her
“At least I don’t grow a beard in four hours.” She quipped and scratched at his stubble lightly with her nails. Dante leaned into the touch, kicking his leg like a dog would with their sweet spot. She grinned at his silly antics.
“You’re right, it’s a good thing too.” Dante stood and stretched. “Man that was needed.” He glanced at his phone as it buzzed and smirked.
Megan watched him curiously as he answered the call. ‘Papa, this is so exciting! Dante’s home!’
Aaron’s soft chuckle in her mind made her grin as she bounced off the bed to run into her bathroom and try to tame her curls. ‘It is a good thing, Megs. His father is here too, I saw him when I was coming home from getting the pizza.’
‘I’ll have to say hi.’ Megan murmured and leaned against the bathroom door to watch Dante talk on the phone. He was so animated with his hands it made her smile as he tried to emphasize the stupidity of the person’s decision. Once she had thoroughly doused her curls and tamed them into order she joined him at the window and watch the rain patter against the glass. Megan leaned against him, her shoulder pressing into his arm and rested her head on his shoulder.
“Victor I have to go. Megan and I are going to watch movies.” Dante murmured, watching her reflection in the glass. She stared at the rain as if she could predict where the next raindrop would fall, and with her brilliant mind, she probably could. “Yes I will tell her you said hello. Tell Brianne I said hello.” He hung up and smiled at her surprised look.
“You didn’t have to hang up for me.” Megan smiled slightly. “Who’s Victor?”
“My cousin. I just spent almost four years with him, heck no I don’t want to talk to him.” Dante grinned at her soft laugh. “Come on, pizza.”
~
Dante returned at dawn after his run with his father to four new text messages. All from Megan. He smiled as he read them from oldest to newest.
4:42-Are you awake, Dante? Please tell me you are, I wouldn’t want to wake you up.
5:19-So I’m sorry if I’m waking you up, but I’m really excited about the genetics program. I wanted to talk to you.
5:37-I really want to accept the offer. Will you be at the New England Institute for awhile?
6:09-I’m going on a hike today, wanna come with? Pleeeeaaaase?
Dante immediately texted her back. ‘Yeah, sure, I’m on my way over after I shower. Am I driving or are you?’
‘I’ll drive! I just got my license!’ Megan’s instant response made him laugh slightly.
‘Not going to die, am I?’ He texted back and left the phone on his bed to go shower. When he came out, his phone was in the middle of her ringtone and he lunged to answer it. “Yeah, Megs?”
“What was the villain in the movie we watched last night?” She asked briskly, way to excited for 6:40 in the morning in any sane person’s opinion.
“You mean Megatron?” Dante asked with amusement in his tone as he slid on a pair of jeans and listened to her hum in thought for a moment.
Megan laughed. “Yeah! Megatron! I was going to respond I won’t run us off the road like Megatron would but then I realized that reference wouldn’t make much sense.” She finished packing the backpack for them, stuffed with way too much food but they could eat it on the drive there and back.
“Alright, MegaMegs.” Dante mused and she gasped in excitement. “What?”
“I like it! MegaMegs! I’m some dastardly villain.” Megan spun in an excited circle, then danced a little in her hiking socks. “Hurry up! I have a bag packed, but grab your own water.”
“That I can do.” Dante murmured, snatching his camelback out of his suitcase. “I’ll be outside in a few minutes.”
Megan danced excitedly in the driver's seat as she waited for Dante to meet her outside. She scrolled through her iPod for what to listen to next to fit her maudlin mood. The girl she helped tutor in chemistry had stocked her library with all sorts of music and Megan hadn't even come close to listening to all the bands. Some were excellent some, not so much. She had finished up all the A bands, and now was working her way through the B letter bands and their discographies. She selected Bruno Mars, her next pick and jumped as the door opened. Dante slid into the passenger seat and she gave him a soft punch in the arm for scaring her.
“Ready!” Dante grinned at her and held his hand out for the iPod. “I’ll make a playlist!” He grinned at her hesitant look.
“I haven’t gone through all my albums yet.” She reluctantly handed him the device. She started driving and grinned. “Breakfast on the road?”
“Sounds good!” Dante fiddled with the playlist, labeling it ‘Hiking music’ and started adding songs. Some rock, some slow power ballads, some hiphop, some crooners, when he was satisfied they would have a playlist long enough for the forty minute drive to the mountains and back he stopped. “So tell me how your schooling went?”
Megan bit her lip and thought her answer over carefully. She kept her breathing even to fight the tears that wanted to well up in her eyes at the frustration or the expletives she wanted to scream in anger. School had always been hell for her when Dante wasn’t there. The mocking comments and lewd slurs. Most nights, after all her work was done, she curled up into a ball in the shower and cried. The feeling of being alone coupled with the feeling of never being good enough for anyone made her want to die most of the time. “It was good. I carried a four point grade point average. My teachers were really supportive.” She answered quietly.
“Awesome. What was your favorite class?” Dante asked quietly, watching her serious expression as she drove. Her intensity bothered him a little bit, usually she was bubbly and happy, this quiet gravity made his instincts stand up. “Megs, are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine! It’s just hard for me to decide what my favorite class was.” She grinned at him and her dull eyes met his for a moment before flitting back to the road. A dark thought started to form in the back of his mind. What happened to her while he was gone? “It had to be microbiology. I could spend hours looking down the scopes at the little life forms.” Megan grinned at him and started onto the freeway.
Dante smiled at the academic while she drove. He watched her for a long moment, catching her attention and earning him a small frown. She gave him a curious look and he just smiled, shrugging it off like it was nothing. Maybe she really was okay, he rationalized and started snooping for food. “I’m kinda hungry Megs.”
“Black backpack at your feet.” Megan answered quietly and listened intently to the songs that were playing as Dante handed her a bagel she had prepared, his favorite bagels and lox breakfast. “Thank you.”
“Oh my favorite!” He murmured, realizing what was on it and laughed at her pleased smile. “You remembered.” Dante recalled only sharing that tidbit with her once and he marveled for a moment at her frightening memory.
“Of course I did.” Megan gave him a small glare and he laughed quietly. “You were gone almost four years, not a lifetime.” It felt like a lifetime to her.
Dante sat back and watched the Oregon scenery pass by with a small smile. “No more talk about the past, okay? Let’s talk about what we want in the future.”
Megan grinned at him and nodded at his plan. Sounded like an excellent idea. “Sure thing, Dante.”
“Excellent, MegaMegs. Now where exactly are we going?” He asked in confusion.
“Spelunking. I’ve always wanted to go to the Oregon Caves and we could go on a hike then catch a tour and then head home?” She offered and danced a little in the driver’s seat to the music. “I kind of like Bruno Mars.” Megan commented quietly, not really expecting him to respond, not many cared.
Dante grinned as he watched the cars whiz by at a stoplight. “As much as it galls me to admit it, I kind of like him too.” He watched Megan’s surprised look. “Oh come on, I know I’m a guy but I can listen to this stuff too!”
Megan laughed slightly and looked at him curiously. “Well of course you can listen to it. And if you’re referring to societal views of music based on gender, I find that utterly ridiculous. Statements like that infuriate me.” She snarled and the intense emotion in her voice was something he had never heard from the curious little kitten before. She was furious, and it showed the way her hands tightened white knuckle tight on the steering wheel.
Dante’s eyebrows went up as she angrily skipped to the next song. “I take it you’ve been told people are surprised you listen to stuff because you’re a girl?” He ventured the guess and knew it would be correct. Her reaction was far too intense to not be personal.
“Well yes.” Megan seemed surprised at his guess. “And you don’t feel the same way?” When did Dante become this intuitive? She squirmed a little internally in discomfort, what else could he deduce about her now?
“Megan I have been your best friend since we were young. I have the utmost respect for you. If you want to listen to heavy metal and then disney songs then that’s your right. I won’t judge you on that.” Dante watched her seem surprised and he wondered what her friends were like now that he was seeing these small insecurities.
Megan grinned at him ruefully. “Sorry, yeah, I’m good. So you wanted to talk about the future, what’s in the future for you?”
Dante returned her smile with a pensive one of his own. What had she been through that made her so cagey? She was never like this. “After my week here and my settling into my place in the New England Institute I have to go finish my training. Then my mom wants me to stay with her for a while.”
Megan bit her lip hard enough to almost draw blood and tried to breathe through the desire to cry. “How long will you be gone?”
“Possibly up to seven years. The Institute training itself is a few years long but it’s self paced. I’d also like to spend a year or so with my family.” Dante answered quietly, hating how suffocating the car felt. “I’ll be able to skype and call more. But the training is in London, and my mom is in Greece.”
“I kind of regret asking. You’ll be coming back after?” Megan’s voice was choked with tears and she tried so hard not to start sobbing as she drove.
“Yes. I intend to be the Director of Security for the New England Institute when I come back. The current one is retiring and my dad thought it would be a good fit.” Dante glanced over and saw the tears streaming down her cheeks. “MegaMegs, villians don’t cry! What’s wrong?”
Megan wiped the heel of her hand on her face and nodded sternly. “Right, they don’t cry. Of course.” She used the remark to pull herself together. She didn’t cry, wasn’t supposed to cry. He didn’t like it when she cried. She took a few deep breaths and smiled brightly at him. “I’m just going to miss you is all.” Her heart hurt so badly she almost feared a physical anomaly. Her chest ached and her stomach hurt. Was she having some physiological issues? Her body didn’t seem any different than before. Curious, what had changed physically in the last few minutes, she puzzled. Was this a physical response to emotional stress? She’d always read about it but never experienced it before outside of the usual emotional manifestations. Interesting. She mused and looked over at Dante. His trip caused her physical pain. How bizarre.
Dante saw the pain still hiding just under that bright smile and took her hand, squeezing gently. “I’m going to miss you, too, MegaMegs.” He whispered sincerely, feeling the separation already in his chest like he’d taken a bullet. “And for you? With your program? Tell me about that.”
Megan smiled slightly at the intellectual spark that started in her mind. “I want to get a doctorate in genetics, and the program also give you the option of getting your MD as well. So I will. Then once that’s done, and I’ve gotten my doctorate, I’ll probably take a few months and travel before I apply for the Paris Institute’s virology program.” She looked at him with a fire in her eyes that reminded him of the old Megan.
“Excellent, eventual goal?” Dante asked quietly.
“Genetic manipulation via virus vectors and if we can really create super humans through genetic manipulation. Kind of Bourne status but not. More impervious to disease, more efficient metabolism, more muscle mass. Stuff like that.” Megan grinned at Dante and her eyes sparkled in delight. “I am so excited.
Dante stared at her in shock as he realized she would become a prime target for any and all assassin clans who wanted to create superior assassins. She would have to be under watch the entire time to make sure no one outside of the Institute started getting wind of what exactly she was and what she was studying. He felt his heart sink as he recognized he was becoming like his father. Decisions for the greater good and the safety of his family and his clan without thought of individual happiness. “Sounds great, Megs. I am so looking forward to watching you get your degrees.” He smiled wistfully and sat back in the seat to enjoy the drive to their destination. His Megs was going to be very busy. He sincerely doubted she’d even remember he was gone after the first semester, he gave that thought a bittersweet smile and dismissed it as she asked him a question about his hiking ability.
“So, how far do you think you can go today? I get that you’ve been a little inactive in your finishing school and it shows.” She teased.
Dante threw his head back and laughed. “I will go as long as you’d like, and pace makes no difference to me.” He smiled and realized as her cheeks turned bright pink he might have said something in appropriate. His own cheeks heated and he laughed nervously. “Um, sorry. Yeah. Hiking, I’ll keep up.” Dante rasped and cleared his throat to calm his nerves. He relaxed when Megan changed the subject to chatter on about his degree and what he planned on doing with physics in real life.
~
“Dante, you’d best wake up, Megan is waiting for you downstairs. She said you were going to the beach today?” His father spoke from the doorway, not entirely sure he was safe waking Dante up by shaking him. Megan barged past him and leapt onto Dante, shouting good morning. “No! Megan wait!”
Dante sat up and caught her, throwing her onto the mattress. Michael cursed slightly and started forward when Dante pinned her down. Michael paused when he heard Megan’s shrieks of laughter. “You said you would give me until eight to sleep in. This is definitely not eight.” Dante laughed as he tickled her.
“Gah! Uncle! I surrender!” She laughed and tried to wriggle out from under him as he tickled her.
Michael stared in surprise at his son, who acted like a tame house cat with the girl yet was deadly with anyone else. It was almost impressive the sway Megan had over his son. She really must be his balance then. He closed the door quietly and left them alone, trusting his son to treat her with respect.
Dante let her up finally and she panted for breath as he glared down at her. “What time is it, Megan?” He asked petulantly.
“Six thirty.” She answered with a sheepish grin.
Dante nodded and burrowed under the blankets again. “I get another hour and a half.”
“But Dante.” Megan whined poking him in the side. She felt bad waking him up but she was ready, she wanted to go to the beach, he promised! “I’m here, let’s just go.”
“No. Another ninety minutes.” He groused at her.
“Eighty seven.” She answered quietly.
Dante sighed. “Whatever. Sleep.”
Megan waited as long as she could before poking him again. “Dante.”
Dante counted eight minutes before she roused him. “Sleep.”
“Fine.” Megan huffed and flopped down on the bed next to him. She felt him relax next to her and smiled slightly. He was falling asleep. Poor Dante, she had kept him up really late the night before with board games and laughing after a long hike and a cave exploration. He needed rest. She curled up on the bed and relaxed herself. Slowly sleep sucked her in and she was passed out, much to Dante’s amusement.
“MegaMegs.” Dante crooned, shaking her awake. “You’ve overslept, it’s almost ten. Come on.” He grinned. She woke up and looked up at him blearily.
“What? Ten? We were supposed to leave at eight thirty.” She frowned slightly. “I’m sorry.” Megan sat up and frowned at Dante, dressed and ready to go.
“I woke up at eight, as promised, got ready, answered some emails, made us breakfast and then woke you up. Come on.” He tugged on her hand and she obligingly wiggled off the bed.
"I'm really sorry, Dante. I screwed this all up. I'm such an idiot." Megan sighed and tried to brush past him to the doors.
Dante held her shoulders in his hands and stared down at her as she refused to meet his eyes. "Look at me, Megan." He commanded quietly. She did and Dante was stunned at the pain in her gaze. Her normally sparkling blue eyes seemed dull and that same dark idea that fluttered in the back of his mind yesterday came back. "You are certainly not an idiot, first off. Second it's okay to be tired, Megan. It's okay not to be on a rigid schedule and just take a break. Understand?"
Hope started to glitter in her eyes and she smiled up at him hesitantly. "You aren't upset we aren't going to spend as much time there?"
"Nope. I get to hang out with my best friend either way." Dante grinned at her and hugged her gently. "You are more important than some silly schedule. You obviously needed sleep." He murmured and she made a noncommittal noise that made him laugh.
"Come on! To the beach!" She grinned up at him and started towards the door.
~
Dante lay back on the blanket and stared up at the stars. This was perfection, fire on the beach with Megan. A day of laughing and being silly. No worries about the future, or his job or his family or her schooling. Just sublime. She sighed next to him and he turned to look at her curiously. “Megs?”
“Can I ask you something really personal?” She asked quietly, not looking at him but her face was grave. His heart sank but he hummed an affirmative. Would it be a question he had an answer to? “How do you deal with your mom not being there?” Megan’s voice cracked and he leaned up on his elbow to look down at her.
Dante studied her face intently for a moment. No tears, but she was obviously upset. He wondered how long she’d been building up her courage to ask him that question. “Megan, my mom didn’t leave me. My parents decided I would have the best chance with my dad and I left with him when I was ten. I’ve been here ever since.” Dante smiled slightly as she turned to look at him with a question in her eyes. “Dr. Catherine went to Athens, where my dad was working and they met there, I was already about three years old. She left her husband for my dad.”
“Really?” Megan gave him a curious look. He’d never talked about his family, she realized. “So your parents were never together?”
“No, and I was never planned either. It was a surprise to my mom and dad. So then Dr. Catherine shows up, snags my dad, she goes on all these trips with him around Europe and my mom stays with the Lukas family and my dad comes back every month for a few weeks, then leaves for a while. I guess my mom knew but I didn’t. I never met Dr. Catherine until we were getting on the plane for Oregon.” Dante laughed slightly. “She snapped at me the first time I met her and I told my father if she said something like that to me again I was going back to Greece.”
Megan laughed softly and sat up a little. “You really did?” Dante nodded slightly. “So your parents are still on good terms?”
Dante shrugged slightly. As good of terms as two allied assassin clan leaders could be. “Yeah, I guess. Dad never sees mom and that’s okay I guess. I never really knew any different. Catherine would probably flip her shit.” He winced at the expletive but Megan just laughed at the idea. “I think it’d be hilarious but dad doesn’t think so. Why haven’t you talked to your dad about it?”
Megan stared into the fire and bit her lip in thought. “It causes him a lot of pain. I don’t want him to have to explain to me that she died, or she didn’t love him any more.” She drifted off and sat up completely to wrap her arms around her knees.
“Megs?” Dante asked quietly as he sat up and sat cross-legged facing her, elbows propped on his knees. He watch her take a deep breath and he simply waited, knowing her mind needed a chance to process just the right words.
Megan tried to put into words what she had felt every single day when she saw mothers and their children fight in the store, or at school beaming with pride and helping with events for their kids, or saw the mothers at the park with their young children. “Why did she leave me? Was I not good enough? Didn’t she want me?” Megan looked up at Dante and deflated under his sympathetic look. He knew a little what it was like.
“Megan, god I don’t even know how to answer that.” He whispered and just stared into her eyes for a moment, listening to the fire crackle. How could he ever explain to her that Dr. Catherine was a royal idiot and he hated her every day when he saw his best friend suffer and she carried on blithely ignorant? He despised his father’s wife for leaving Megan. Probably more than Megan did and should. “I never willingly leave you. I have to because I obligations but I would much rather be here,” he made a sweeping motion to the beach they were on and the space between the two of them. “With you. Hands down. Every time.”
“Really?” Her voice was so tiny, so crushed that he just wanted to wrap her up in a hug and convince her that everything he said was true.
“Yes. And you are amazing. Never let anyone ever tell you otherwise. If that woman had any ounce of sense she would have been at your side your entire life. She is an idiot for not being here. Don’t you ever think yourself unworthy of her.” Dante’s vehemence broke something in her heart and she started sobbing. His eyes went wide as she hid her face on her knees and keened. “Megan, darling.” He murmured quietly, trying to soothe her hurts and smoothed a hand down her hair reassuringly. He tugged her gently into his lap and wrapped his arms around her protectively. It felt so right having her curled up in his arms even if she was sobbing her heartbreak into his chest.
Megan wrapped her arms around his neck and cried into his shoulder. She mourned the idea of having a mother more than the woman who abandoned her. Megan just wanted someone there to love her with that fabled, unconditional mother’s love. She obviously didn’t deserve it. That was why she left. Dante was mistaken, he didn’t know how broken she was. He could never know, Megan realized. It would break his sweet, gentle heart if he knew how much she hated herself, how alone she felt, how worthless she was.
Dante held her and rocked her gently, smoothing his hand over her hair as she cried. The sounds of the ocean almost drowned out his soft murmurs against her hair, promising that she was worth it, she was more than good enough, that he valued her. He didn’t tell her that he valued her more than anything else in his life. That would have frightened her. She started to calm down and her breathless, body-wracking sobs evened out, allowing her to catch her breath. “Megan you don’t have to mourn her, she wasn’t worthy of you.” He spoke with absolute conviction that she almost believed him.
Sixteen years of doubt, and questioning herself welled up in her and she doubted Dante’s words. He was supposed to say nice things to her, he was her best friend. She fought for control of herself and cleared her throat a few times before speaking between small sobs. “I always thought I did something wrong. I always lose people I care about. It kills me when you’re gone. I am so alone.” Dante held her tighter and she rested her cheek on his shoulder as the exhaustion made her eyes droop.
“You’re not alone, Megan.” He promised and rested his cheek on her head. “I swear to you. I’ll be there for you.” Dante whispered and felt her relax into him.
“I’m going to hold you to that, Dante Lukas MacKellan.” She whispered and sounded drowsy.
“Megan, when was the last time you slept?” He asked quietly.
Megan shrugged and hummed thoughtfully. “The nap with you this morning.” She answered cheekily. “And the nap with you the day you came back.” She whispered honestly.
“I’ll drive back, you can sleep, okay?” Dante answered under her cheek and he nodded against his shoulder, already relaxing into sleep. “Sweet dreams, sleepy head.” He murmured and she made a soft nonsensical comment in return as she started to doze.
Dante picked her up and used his basic telekinesis to pack up their stuff. She slept like a rock in his arms the entire trek back up to the car and he chuckled as he set her in her passenger seat. “You’re lucky I am who I am otherwise you would be one grouchy MegaMegs.” He teased and talked to her as he buckled her in and reclined the seat, making her comfortable.
“I am lucky. I like MegaMegs.” She murmured, half asleep and nuzzled his hand as he gently stroked her hair out of her face.
Dante smiled at her response and slid into the driver’s seat. He glanced at her one last time before he started driving and grinned slightly. She was adorable, curled up in a little ball on her side, lips parted on soft sleepy sighs. His Megs, he mused and started the car. When he came home next, he would definitely be making her his.
