idk if this is controversial but is the neurodivergent label actually helpful outside of activism? like as an allistic adhd person i only relate occasionally to autistic people (mainly sensory issues tbh or social stuff but then again i have mad anxiety) n p much not at all to dyslexic/dyspraxic/etc people (the question of whether ocd n bpd are considered neurodivergencies is another question). but i keep seeing videos n stuff about ‘nd traits’ or ‘calling all nds’ and it seems like it’s become a quirky shorthand mainly used by autistic/audhd people that doesn’t feel like it includes nd allistics? im not saying everything should be focused around me me me, just that if you mean autistic just say autistic rather than neurodivergent.
I guess this kinda ties in with the whole (saw a tiktok and did no actual research) self diagnosis/quirkification of nd + mental illness online. (I’m v much pro informed self dx bc of costs n accessibility n consequences of having an official dx esp for autistics w housing n kids). I also think even if ur diagnosed making light hearted ‘put a finger down nd edition’ videos should b done w caution bc they often inadvertently contribute to the trivialisation of the struggles faced by nd ppl. you have to be aware of who your content reaches- tt/ insta is v different from tumblr/reddit lol.
and while I’m on this rant I hate the ‘neurotypical bad and complicated, neurodivergent good and direct’ narrative too. neither is good nor bad, just different. you gotta find your people because no one owes it to you to change their entire communication style just for you. just like I have to make an effort to do small talk etc with nts I have to focus on what I’m saying and explicitly spell out certain things when talking to my autistic friends. I understand people are hurt by nts being unaccepting and actually ableist and so go into this ‘I’m special and better than them’ mindset but it’s just not helpful imo.
I also feel like nd people find it hard to accept that you can be hella annoying and people finding you annoying isn’t ableist. I can be annoying as fuck and I try not to be- instead of going ‘ugh I can’t help interrupting people all the time and never letting them finish a thought- they’re being ableist’, I try n number the ideas I’m having and wait for the other person to finish or say ‘hey can I quickly add something before I forget and then you can continue’ and listen if they tell me to hold on a sec. relationships are about compromise n that’s not ableist.
maybe it’s just me not feeling like I fit in the ‘adhd is a gift’ narrative or the neurodivergent movement. I hate having adhd and would do anything to not have it. I do struggle to call it a disability tbh but I accept that that’s partially internalized ableism bc I can temporarily convince myself that I can function unmedicated n then I have exams n I fall apart…
anyway if anyone has thoughts pls do lmk
