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This is probably the most shitpostiest would never happen in canon request but…

Head-canons for the doctor taking a fancy to the major’s “girlfriend” that the major keeps on the zeppelin.

At first Avondale (Dok) isn't too keen on having her on the Zeppelin; it's another mouth to feed. Max (the Major) eats a lot, he's fully exspecting the his Fraüline to eat the same ammount. Surprisingly, their's left over for Hans (the Captain) who enjoys the food.

Though Avondale's happy that she makes Max happy; his best friend has a lady friend that makes him happy, how cute!

As time goes on, Avondale, grows fond of her laugh... It's not crazy like Max, or the other vampires. Or nonexistent like the Hans.

With Avondale enjoying hearing her laugh, he begins to try and make her laugh. Which is how he finds out that she has a simular since of humor.

It's all over from there, he's in love.

Avondale's not a jealous man and he knows his place. She's the Max's Fraüline... which makes him sad; though he doesn't show it.

Think of the song Jessie's Girl by Rick Springfeild; that's exactly how Avondale feels.

He makes mental notes on which foods she likes the most. If she wants something that's not in his recipe book, he will spend hours finding the right recipe. If food is the way to a man's heart it must be the same for women.

He also starts baking and uses a cover so it doesn't seem like he's doing it just for her. "I was bored Major and baked something for you and your Fraüline."

Poor Hans is the only one who knows; Avondale often confides in him. Schrö eventually finds out and teases Avondale relentless when Max isn't around. The three of them keep it between eachother.

When the crew goes out shopping and what not, Avondale often picks up foods that you like. He'd get trinkets or souvenirs but Max gets her way too many. He does end up helping Max pick out some for her.

Avondale will never tell her how he feels, because again she makes Max happy, and Max seems to make her happy. He would rather be miserable for her to be happy.

IF it turns out that she isn't really into Max and starts taking a liking to him instead, he's be excited... then he would realize how much that would hurt Max, and never act on it.

Plus, if Max finds out about an affair their's no telling how he'd react. He would never want her to get hurt.

#hellsing #headcannos #avondale naypeer #max montanna #hans gunsche #Millennium #sorry it took so long.

The older I am the more I think that Jesus was an alien and all that Christianity is just the misunderstanding.

I started to think about that when he need to go on a desert to pray/talk to his father. And was unconventional in every way (like teaching woman). And healed a lot.

So here are my headcannos:

The obvious reason why aliens would visit the earth is to tell about space federation (Aka The Kingdom of Heaven... kingdom seems less StarTrek but still).

The Jesus want's to tell about joining the Kingdom of Heaven if the humanity grow up to their standards of being good and peaceful.

Jesus was having the high-tech healing abilities. He could give that device/ability to the people around (his disciples).

I like the woman suffering from hemorrhage story. She was healed by touching Jesus and he was like "who the fuck just drained batteries in my devices"? Even so he was again companionate and good for her.

Angel visiting Mary was the alien communication. They need a human vessel to send humanity their ambassador. So the Jesus was engineered human alien hybrid that could be possessed by alien ambassador. (Have you watched Avatar?)

Star over Bethlehem? More like a shiny spaceship. Because why would star hang for months in the same place than supervising the born of valuable hybrid.

Jesus vessel was bounded to the ambassador at least once when it was 12 and amazed everyone in Jerusalem Temple. Then he was active ambassador it's 30s for 3 years.

It's so suspicious that he needed to pray in the isolated places everyday. And he was calling god his "dad". Then I realized that spaceships are often called "mother". But that makes only sense in human reproductive system. Maybe aliens calls their main spaceship "father".

That reminded me of how Jesus started his ambassador activity. He started with meeting the John the Baptist (another miraculous child, probably the human hybrid beta - in the end this hybrid could only eat locusts and honey). So Jesus was somehow guided or activated by Saint John. Then he need the synchronization with Dad ship so he spend 40 days in the desert to do so.

Jesus is telling people that he will come back. Obviously when some of the humankind reach the potential to be part of Kingdom of Heaven, they will be chosen to join it.

His take home message is love yourself and your mates. It look like this is universal galactic knowledge.

I still struggle with the rest of story. Obviously I've seen some analisys before why God choose this time period to put the Jesus on earth. It make common sense as the Mediterranean Sea is in for the first time in one country. There is an amazing net of good Roman roads. And everybody speeks Greek. The best time to spread informations (but not for the whole globe unfortunately).

I also struggle with the Messiah being foreseen in many prophecies. Did aliens use the prophecies of the Israel or they really helped them through history and talked to their prophets? Not a clue.

The last but not least problem. I don't get the whole crucifixion point. The ressurection is fine. Reviving a dead body is cool and possible for aliens. The power will for sure make wird stains on turin shroud.

But why? Why they need to make him killed? And not making big reveal after but just show him to some people. Because the Jesus know he will die and he says that to his disciples. The closest ones. Was he talking about something else? When he told that they can destroy the Jerusalem Temple and he will build it back in three days, was he talking about actual temple? Was the whole crucifixion his plan or it was just accident? So many questions.

Hope you're gonna enjoy my headcannos. Love yourself and you fellows. Bye!

#jesus #bible #headcannos #bible fic #aliens #Messiah #jesus fic #alien!jesus #spaceship #human hybrid #alien hybrid #human alien hybrid #👽#pray #love #Kingdom of Heaven #hallawia #long post

Trump Cards finding a friendly stray cat

Alucard: Will feed the stray cat and spend some time with it every day. Other than that he will leave them be

Anderson: Would bring the cat back to the orphanage. Gives the children some thing living to play with will also teach them respect... and it’s free pest control.

Hans: If the cat looked heathy he would leave it out side and visit with it on occasions. If the cat looks sick he would take it to the vet and make sure it was alright before releasing it. If it can’t be released, Montana loves cats so it would be homed.

#hellsing #alucard #alexander anderson #hans gunsche #headcannos #honestly relates to my life atm.

Video game headcannons for the trump cards

Alucard; He plays shooter games... Doesn’t matter what he’s killing or who he is... Oh, I’m Mastercheif cool? I’m the Doomguy, ok... I’m some random solider, in COD, fine with me.

Anderson: He likes puzzle and trivia games... and Doom since killing monsters is his thing, he’s partial to Halo... only cause he can kill Alucard on multiplayer.

Hans; RPG’s are his thing, they make him feel like he has control of his choices. Also Tetris, he will kick your ass at Tetris VS.

#hellsing #alucard #alexander anderson #hans gunsche #headcannos

HOI!

I kept running threw the Hellsing tag and was noticing a lack of stuffs for the fandom; so I thought I would contribute! I wrote for the fandom a long time ago on Quotev. I personally have been starring for content, so when in doubt create your own!

#hellsing #ask blog #headcannos #alucard #integra hellsing #seras victoria #alexander anderson #hans gunsche #herr doktor #uh...#you know the characters from hellsing

fuck it, taywhora hcs that i’ve been storing up:

- a’whora, despite being very lovey dovey with tayce is the most easily flustered, anything past a kiss on the cheek and she’s blushing, especially in public. it’s amusing and tayce loves to tease her about it

- it also works as a good way to shut her up because she has a habit of talking too much shit about people

- they eat beans on toast for breakfast religiously and tayce has a bean tier list with asda being at the bottom and heinz being at the top (a’whora prefers the ones with sausages in them)

- tayce is very good at any game they try to play, a’whora not so much, she whines about losing constantly but won’t turn down a match becasue she’s very competitive

- continuing from that, she gets annoyed at constantly losing and starts practicing for hours on end when tayce isn’t around so she can beat her next time she plays

- they steal eachothers clothes a lot due to being similar sizes and having similar styles. it starts with one of tayce’s flannels going missing before being found on a’whora to tayce wearing her highlighter pink turtleneck because she thinks it’s cute

- a’whora as a person is very ¬///¬

- she falls asleep on tayce one time early into their relationship, cuddling into her chest before waking up and being mortified and apolosing profuesely

- tayce is generally unbothered by most things but the one thing that pisses her off is when a’whora gets insecure and starts doubting herself, she’s the kind of person to shower her with love and praise but get very serious about not saying bad things about herself and reminding her how talented she is

- they are a nightmare to deal with if they’re drunk and at a takeaway, a’whora will start a fight with anyone who looks at her funny while tayce holds her back from getting them kicked out bc she just wants a kebab - drunk a’whora is her without the filter, sticking herself to tayce’s side and always going in for kisses and pouting when she doesn’t get her way

- drunk tayce is the same, only she gets a lot more emotional about it and is constatntly saying how much she loves her friends and especially her girlfriend - they go on late night trips to a 24hr tesco and get meal deals at like 1am

- a’whora is a fashion designer and gets way too into her work, resulting in tayce dragging her to beds some nights if she’s at it too late because she knows she won’t sleep well and will be falling asleep at the sewing machine the next day

- tayce is a few inches taller and milks it (or alternativly a’whora is a deal shorter but always wears platforms because she doesn’t like being small)

- tayce not being the most emotionally availible person, she’s fine expressing her feelings but isn’t one for showing much vunerabilty, so it builds up over time and explodes in either anger or isolating herself from people (a’whora helps her learn healthier coping strategies)

- lawrence is the one who pushes them together beacuse it pisses her off to see them pining and flirting but never admitting to their full feelings

- they are absolutely a fwb situation before that

#taywhora #headcannos #dear lord that was a lot

echo/vigil headcannons pls?

Echo/Vigil headcannos! As always, some +18 (im surely going to horny jail)

Thank you for the request annon! I aprecciate it a lot!

My ask box is always open for hcs and ficlets! So feel free to ask anything! Ain't picky!

I’m sorry for the late rep, i’ve been very busy lately, i found a cat on the street and i decided to take it home. The cat is somewhat sick and i have to be looking after her, but please! i’ll answer every requests!

Vigil

Vigil loves to steal and wear Echo's oversized pajamas (and by pajamas i mean those old clothes you use to like, be at home) and hoodies. It makes him feel protected, plus, he carries around Echo's scent.

He doesn't like video games as much as Echo does, but his favorite thing to do when they're off duty is to watch Echo enjoy his video games until he gets bored and starts teasing the gamer lustfully as he plays, yeah, he is a horny man

Vigil is not affectionate in public and neither is Echo, Vigil wants to himself profesional around people. Echo doesn’t mind being affectionate in public, but respects Vigil’s desicions.

Vigil can get really loud when ever Echo pins him down 😳😏

Vigil is the big spoon, he can’t sleep if he’s not squeezing Echo’s chest

Vigil really likes (like, a lot) to shower with his partner. Not with sexual intent (most of the time lol) but to just spent time intimately, to scrub, caress and contemplate eachothers bodies.

Echo

Echo is aware Vigil likes to keep it profesional in public, so the most daring thing he can really do is to stare at him, perch his eyes on him, he knows Vigil can feel his look.

Echo hates going against his partner in the simulators. He hates to disorient him, he knows how painful and annoying the sonic blasts can be (he has tried it on himself, lmao) so he tries to avoid him as much as he can.

Echo ocasionally calls Vigil Soba-chan (japanese noodles) because Vigil is delicious.

Whenever Vigil is deployed on a mission, Echo likes to grab Vigil’s blanket (yeah they dont share blankets because Echo keeps rolls in to it.) to remind himself he will be okay.

Echo used to be super awkward with him until he asked him out.

Vigil sometime tops him whenever he manages to get really drunk, and Echo never complians 😏

Echo is, surprisingly, the best cook from both. Vigil also is very good when it comes to cooking, but Echo will often insist to let him spoil him.

#r6s echo #r6s vigil #r6s #headcannos #omg help #this cat cant stay still #kitty is very cute tho #i'm sorry for the late rep #ahhhh

✧ * . brotp #2 ft. lily malevsky & cathy hiatt . * ✧

( @indaylghts )

who is more excited for halloween?

lily! she loves dressing up. cathy can be coaxed with alcohol.

who gives the best gifts?

lily, once more.

#friendship: cathy #headcannos