Grigon and Questa #9 (Will you be the everlasting home of my heart?)
“..For the universe of my soul was once beautiful because you were eternal the center of it all, love..”
(I should make a playlist for these two, maybe by adding Demons, Bring Me To Life, Free, Riptide, Mary On a Cross, Somethin’ Stupid, Made In Japan, Try, World Caves In, Two Birds On a Wire, Young and Beautiful, The Winner Takes It All, and millions of other songs that heartbreakingly remind me of these beautifully angsty, fluff-ridden, eternally yearning soul-bond dorks).
”Oh, this could be the end of everything, for as new stars arise, glistening galaxies awaken anew, and solar systems blaze beautifully aflame- why don’t we go.. somewhere only we personally know to inspire each other with the same gentle soul that’ll forever carry the precious memory of us within the personal universe of our hearts?” - Love lost to time.
“Whenever stars go down and galaxies ignite, I’ll think of you each time they wash me in their light, and fall in love with you again, so say the word and I’ll be running back to find you; a thousand armies won’t stop me I’ll break through, I’ll soar the endless skies for only one sight of your starlight.” - Starlight (by STARSET).
“We’re a billion of beautiful hearts, and you sold us down the river too far; what about us? What about all the times you said you had the answers? What about us? What about all the broken happy ever after? What about us? What about all the plans that ended in disaster? What about love? What about trust..?” - What About Us? (by P!nk).
“I’ll never shake away the pain, I close my eyes and she’s still there, I let her steal into my melancholy heart, it’s more than I can bear.. now I know she’ll never leave me- even as she runs away, she will torment me, calm me, hurt me, come what may..” - Evermore (by Dan Stevens; beautiful song of yearning).
“You who I pray to, I desolate too; consecrate you, I love and hate you, hum a hymn to, Scylla I swim to, watch a whirlpool spin and jump into.. you know you make me wanna run away (you do), kingdom come, you make me wanna stay..” - Ma Meilleure Ennemie (by Stromae).
“I have a feeling you got everything you wanted, and you’re not wasting time stuck here like me, you’re just thinking it was a small thing that happened- the world ended when it happened to me.” - We Hug Now (by Sydney Rose).
“Once more, you open the door, and you’re heart in my heart and my heart will go on- love can touch us one time, and last for a lifetime, and never let go ‘til we’re gone; love was when I loved you.. one true time I’d hold to..” - My Heart Will Go On (by Celine Dion).
“I would never fall in love again until I found her, I said I would never fall unless it’s you I fall into; I was lost within the darkness.. but then I found her, I found you..” - Until I Found You (by Stephen Sanchez).
“I don’t want them to know the secrets, I don’t want them to know the way I loved you, I don’t think they’re understand it no… I don’t think they would accept me no; I loved, and I loved, and I lost you…” - Hurts Like Hell (by Fleurie).
“Shoot another shot, try to stop the feeling (well, I told you so), you can say it’s just the way you are, make a new excuse another a stupid reason, and you’d have to stop the world just to stop the feeling!” - Good Luck, Babe! (by Chappell Roan).
“I had all and the most of you, some and now none of you, take me back to the night we met- I don’t know what I’m supposed to do haunted by the ghost of you…!” - Night We Met (by Lord Huron).
“We’re not broken just bent, and we can learn to love again, it’s in the stars- it’s been written in the beautiful scars of our hearts..” - Just Give Me a Reason (by P!nk).
“Well, you only know the light when it’s burning low, only miss the sun when it starts to snow, only know you love her when you let her go..” - Let Her Go (by Passenger).
“Moon, tell me if I could, send up my heart to you, so when I die, which I must do, could it shine down here with you?” - My Love Mine All Mine (by Mitski 🥰💖💫)
“Bring me close, let me feel the beat of your heart, the secret you bury, lend me your voice, anything you want to say, I’ll be right here.” - Lend Me Your Voice (by Belle).
“Cause sometimes I look in her eyes, and that’s where I find a glimpse of us, and I try to fall for her touch, but I’m thinking of the way it was.” - Glimpse of Us (by Joji)
“With simple songs I wanted more, perfection is too quick to bore, you are more beautiful by far, our flaws are who we really are.” - I Hear a Symphony (by Cody Fry).
“If our love- is tragedy why are you my remedy, if our love is insanity why are you my clarity?” - Clarity (by Zedd, Foxes).
“Look at the stars, look how you shine for you; and everything you do..” - Yellow (by Coldplay).
“I dream of you endlessly, drowning in reverie, waiting for morning..” - Angela (by FlowerFace).
“For maybe only love can hurt like this..!”
.⋆ 𖥔 ݁ ˖₊‧.*•⊹*.★⭒.‧₊˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ .
Personal Grigon and Questa Headcanons:
Since both Grigon and Questa took quite a personal and genuinely special interest in each other ever since they befriended each other as kids, and although they were initially weary and hesitant about sharing their hopes/fears, the precious treasure of their friendship eventually blossomed into the untouchable holy symphony and healing garden of a childlike love so pure, it felt as if it was beautifully written within the scars of their hearts.
And, after many months of emotionally connecting and closely strengthening the sweet warmth of their bond as children, which was surprisingly as unprejudiced as can be, both Questa and Grigon began to really adore and even cherish one another with a fondness that truly transcended the polarities of their cultures, species, and home-worlds; and they, come what may, even became endearingly closer than any would anticipate, because they were ‘soul-compatible’ despite not being biologically compatible.
So, long ago as children, Questa’s authentic silliness, infectious optimism, and empathetic nature helped lower Grigon’s own emotional guard down, whereas his soul’s courageous passion, rebellious streak, and determination to fight for the ones he loves, aided in the youthful development of their bond as they began expressing themselves fully to each other until they both felt unashamedly safe enough to fully open up to each other (despite their culture or upbringing).
They also became each other’s peaceful refuge and the only place where they felt free to fully express themselves as the silly kindred spirits they were with every passing day they wholeheartedly spent growing in childlike love.
And their genuine consideration of each other (thinking about they’ll actions will make them feel), thus helped them drop the painfully conditioned masks they were taught to always hide behind to appease their parents..
Also, the precious moments of Grigon unhesitatingly swaddling her nautilus form within his bunched-up silk within their web-hammock, as their hearts sang in unison as a Shared Nap-pulse (their own emotionally heartfelt Pulse-Sync) became a treasured core memory which they’ll forever carry within the seas of their aching hearts.. even after they unfortunately go their separate ways.
Yet, although they promised to stay beside one another and always keep each other within the personal universe of their souls, Grigon- with a heavy heart, begrudgingly sent her away back to Gomia despite the fact that she was there when he became encased within his carapace and supported him through excruciating aftermath of it; for he’d rather choose his duty to the Blood Empire over the reciprocal yearning he personally held for Questa (and the beautiful of love he kept repressed within the gardens of his devout heart), to fully ensure her safety, emotional wellbeing, and to even grant her a chance to live a brighter and safer life (away from the greedy claws of his father).
For, despite what everyone else believed, he let her go in the name of his love for her.. and because he truly longed to save her from Blood Emperor Gallaxhiar’s power-hungry obsession over her chi, which was a personal healing energy each Gommian held within their primary Quantunium heart-sac (which was, in ancient mythology, considered their soul-light or inner life-force renewed aglow).
But, even after Grigon thankfully reigned triumphant and vanquished his father within the colosseum (barely making it out alive in one piece that is), he personally felt too guilty to actually reach out and re-connect with Questa after everything that’s happened between them (and he was viscerally afraid that his enemies would exploit his ‘soft-spot’ for his best-friend and every precious feeling of genuine vulnerability he still held for her within his soul).
And, since he also had revolutionaries and other galactic enemies who wished for his head on a silver platter as well, he also believed it’d be selfish to inadvertently make her a target for his enemies to use as a callous way of emotionally piercing him straight through the heart (just as they’ve been trying to do with little Glordon too!)
However, as years pass, with their letters lessening and lessening with each one, after Grigon sends his young son to Gomia within an escape capsule to save him from a Nebb’ulina assassin, he reunites with Questa again after realizing she was protecting Glordon and caring for him on Gomia (at least for a couple of days to a week).
And, despite his best efforts in trying to persuade her that it’s far too dangerous to stay with him to help nurture Glordon (despite the fact that he personally doesn’t possess Lysandrea’s warm touch or any kind of maternal softness that his son personally needs), Questa encouragingly insists that a child deserves to live a life as a child rather than conforming to what social norms expects him to be! For a precious friendship made between Glordon and her nieces and nephew (with her own gentle guidance), will balance out Grigon’s stern discipline with the warmth of heartfelt acceptance, truly boast his self-esteem, strengthen his emotional feelings of genuine beginning, and even aid in his ability to embrace and love every unique piece of himself that makes him different!
For, she’s always trying to remind Grigon that he and her family will never be alone if they remember that they’ll always have someone that loves them for who they truly are, and that a child’s footsteps shouldn’t be dictated by mere tradition because they are their own person who wishes to write their own story/future; and, not only can they can heal their generational trauma by being better parental figures than their own were, but a genuine friendship between the children they love most will be healing and heartwarming for them all as a family!
For, since she personally empathizes with the feelings of being born unique (along with pain of misunderstandings and loneliness that came with it as the ‘sniffling leaf’ she was labeled as), Questa openly expresses that she doesn’t want any child to feel the way she did (to the point that she felt like a question lost without an answer to be found).
And she’s not only one of the lucky few who he actually listens to even when Grigon’s temper flares up or whenever he’s stubbornly boasting at times, but the way Questa genuinely expresses herself without having any ulterior motive but just wishing to reciprocally make him and his son (and her family) happy, endearingly softens his ‘intimidating exterior’ and genuinely encourages him to be kinder towards the ones he loves with all his heart.
Yet, where Grigon strictly commands through respect rather than ‘the softness of coddling’, while acting as the stern but endearingly protective father for his son, Questa tenderheartedly listens to everything Glordon or the triplets wish to ramble about or express to their hearts delight (yet they argue about her having too much of a lenient soft spot for the children whereas she teases him about being a comically overprotective grump with a heart of gold that’s far too afraid to express his love for his son).
And, although Grigon is obviously known to repress his ‘weak emotions’ just as much as he ferociously conceals his ‘soft flesh’ beneath his quadrupedal armor, while self-sabotaging or tempestuously snapping at anyone he deems isn’t genuinely trustworthy enough (and others who still try getting him to open up), the mere truth that Grigon fully opened up to Questa (even from a young age before their inevitable departure) and even shed his carapace in front of her as an adult as a genuine expression of true vulnerability (before and even after the events at the Communiverse within my SilkSea AU), just expresses the blessed warmth of the beautiful trust he placed in her and shows just how much he’s always loved her enough to believe that she was worth risking it all evermore for no matter what..
Yet, I can truly imagine Questa helping Grigon genuinely open up and accept love again (as they learn to fully process their unresolved grief together) as she melts the emotionally reserved barriers around his closed off heart, whereas Grigon emotionally helps her truly assert herself and feel safe without her feeling guilty about it (alien-pleaser always fixing other’s problems rather than healing her own finally receiving the recognition she deserves).
So, after their whole reunion, and after many emotionally intimate heart-to-hearts and reconciliations with each other (especially about the heartfelt remembrance of their past unforgettable friendship), both Grigon and Questa begin co-parenting and nurturing Glordon’s inherent uniqueness together, yet they still have many disagreements and arguments about Glordon’s upbringing, their own personal tribulations, and external conflicts (like cosmic danger and other problematical ‘transgressions’ from other sectors that viscerally affect Grigon and enhances his overprotectiveness over Questa and his son, because what they can at least unanimously agree on is that Glordon’s emotional and physical wellbeing will always come first before even them).
But still, all and all, since Questa is far more lovingly expressive than the Blood Emperor is in both personality and nature, she’s also far more openly accepting and even wholeheartedly encouraging of Glordon’s peculiar quirks, kind-hearted sense of self, and endearing uniqueness later on as she tutors/nurtures him with the warmth of an understanding Lady Majesta never gave her.. because of how kind, empathetic, thoughtful, compassionate, considerate, and even unswervingly protective she is of her loved ones (and her longing to be better than her own mother was).
Yet, Grigon, on the other nub, austerely sheds light upon the fact that he must grow up and ascend into the warrior (as well as lead commander of the armada) he’s meant to become one day, to follow the steps of tradition, to enter his carapace, continue the legacy, and gloriously bring honor to their family name all because of how unyielding, unsympathetic, unbending, authoritarian-like, and undeniably committed he is to the safety of his family (he wishes to keep Glordon safe the only way he personally knows how before the universe harshly teaches him far worse than he has).
But, the fact that Questa and Grigon both personally understand and empathize with the pain of emotionally bottling everything up, all for the sake of keeping Glordon and the other children ‘obliviously protected’ within the warm bubble of their innocence and childlike happiness, yet still find ways of vulnerably opening up to each other to the fullest of their ability, just expresses how much they deeply loved and cared for one another in an emotionally intimate and truly irreplaceable way that surprised even them (but overflowed their hearts with joyous warmth)
All and all, although Grigon is an ill-tempered, hot-headed, and endearingly overprotective dork with a short-fuse who’ll do anything to ensure the safety of his family because he loves them more than anything in the whole universe (while also being the type of get hilariously flustered or jealous), whereas Questa is a cool-headed, empathetic, compassionate, and truly trustworthy sweetheart that sees the best in everyone (yet she makes sure to reminds others never to mistake her kindness for weakness), both always, no matter how excruciating it can be, try to compromise with each other; an example being Grigon cease plasma-blasting almost every alien at Garden Parties that ‘gets too close’ to her whenever she’s enlightening them about the stars (much to the amusement of Zephyr and the others as they all burst into giggles).
So they, in a way, after so long of believing that the possibility of a soul genuinely accepting, understanding, and loving every messy version of themselves was far too excruciating to be true, finally realize that there is someone that cherishes them like it’s breathing and.. and that they can fully be vulnerable with the friend that has stayed alongside them during all their ups and downs.
For both Grigon and Questa, despite their antithetical personalities and cultural differences, felt as if they could truly be themselves with one another and that they could openly express their feelings with each other; someone who, no matter whatever happens between them (especially later on at the Communiverse), no matter how impossible it may seem, and no matter what argument they have, still longed to fully love, accept, and stay with the other until the end.
And, since she’s the only one who can extinguish his ‘wrath’ and gather up the courage to argue with him when absolutely necessary (because they are equally matched in high regard to their intellect and unwavering holy loyalty to their family/what they believe is right), they personally know that they, rain or shine, can fully open themselves up and express their inner demons to one another, because why don’t they fully and unashamedly trust the one that gave them the courage to live ever since they were young?
And, since both are also afraid of breaking down for the sake of protecting the children from their hidden melancholy, both try to tentatively encourage one another to embrace and grieve for the loss of their loved ones (even if that personally leads to many arguments and precious heart-to-hearts later on amidst their healing journey), but both personally respect that, although they’re obviously imperfect, they at least make the effort to try to be better and understand each other’s differing viewpoints.
Overall, since they personally understand what it’s like to stay strong in the name of your love for a child/loved one (to keep them within a bubble of joy and blissful ignorance rather than for making them see the truthful reality of their sadness), they for the millionth time.. become each other’s safe place to express their most ‘flawed but beautifully messy parts’ whenever they’re alone, begin healthily communicating their feelings, and even openly sharing their fears and hidden vulnerabilities with each other all because they still fully trust each other with all their souls.
Yet, even though she genuinely loves the children with her whole soul, she’s fearful that she’ll inadvertently neglect or hurt them the way.. Majesta did to her long ago by using her as a scapegoat for her own unresolved pain, so Grigon (heartbreakingly moved by how she’s genuinely choosing to heal all for the sake of loving the children the way her own mother couldn’t adore her with the warmth she needed), promises and vows with all his heart to be the guardian/father Glordon personally deserves most (because they love their family more than anything in the universe).
So, thankfully, later on, Questa and Grigon, after strengthening their (highly unconventional) relationship and rekindling the precious trust they once shared with one another back within the warmth of their youth, finally gather the courage to fully express themselves to the children (post-canon Elio movie), and they all learn to emotionally heal together as a family (just as Lysandrea, Bronach, and even Quasar would’ve wanted for them all).
And, since Questa genuinely believes Grigon to be a miracle (and the only good thing Gallaxhiar ever dared to bless the universe vice versa with Grigon believing with all his heart that she’s the holy symphony of his soul), they make an emotionally heartwarming choice to change, grow, and support one another together as a true found-family deserving of peaceful refuge.
For they teach each other that giving space isn’t the same as giving up on each other, caring deeply for someone shouldn’t mean losing yourself in the process, and that every beautiful imperfection one possesses is deserving of the belonging, respect, kindness, and love their hearts seek evermore.
And that, most of all, the beautiful vulnerability of truly embracing who you really are and fully opening yourself up to your loved ones will genuinely lead to inner peace, true joy, heartfelt freedom, and sincere self-fulfillment.
For she’ll always warmheartedly remind him that, no matter how many times he tries pushing her away all in the heartfelt name of ‘loving her so much to let her go..’
And no matter how many armies he leads to victory, one cannot rule or truly live on without the healing presence of genuine love.
For how can one forget the precious existence of a love so precious it vulnerably entwined them for all eternity?
Even if the awe of their softness haunts them anew?
Especially as ancient yearning and heart-ache beautifully blossoms within their souls as their own personal torment?
For how could the echoes of time ever dare to fully heal the scars of their hearts when the longing they heartbreakingly surpress re-opens each one?
And yet, although their relationship was emotionally healthier and far more unorthodox than anyone ever truly knew (so not ‘romantic’ in a conventional sense but still and if not more special than anyone would believe), both still warmheartedly held each other to high regard within the personal universe of their souls (because they were the favorite pieces of themselves and the heartfelt soft spots both endlessly treasured with nostalgic heart-ache).
Also, since they truly admired and saw the pieces of themselves that they personally wish to love within each other (reflecting the vulnerable softness and inner heart-fire both possess like a mirror), they’d resolve things consistently by talking/communicating with one another; so no matter how frustrating it was to make their voice heard, they’d always find a way to admit their faults, mistakes, and honorably apologize with genuine humility and shame when they needed (and personally wanted) to.
Yet, no matter how times Grigon would rage against the trials of genuine love and curse the fading light.. just as Questa would heartbreakingly reminisce upon the warmth of who they used to be and gaze within every memory-orb as if falling within the dreamlike reverie of a life lost, it still felt as if the hope of everything they meant to each other was an everlasting love that never truly extinguished..
But, rain or shine, even after everything that’s happened between them, Questa still prayed for Grigon’s and Glordon’s safety beneath the Holy Tree of Spirits within her family’s private Ancestral Coves, whereas even he’d protectively safeguard and watch her planet from afar just to readily ensure her species safety, and why you may ask?
Because they, come what may, still deeply loved one another as two best-friends who wished with all their hearts to uphold the precious promise they made to each other as children, that no matter how impossible it may seem or be, no matter how much the universe tries tearing them apart, they’ll endlessly fight for and risk it all as two best-friends who’ll always adore each other for all eternity.
For, even if they’re across hundreds of solars systems, thousands of parallel realities, or maybe even a million alternate universes, and even if Grigon personally must burn down any world to keep both Questa and Glordon safe before he loses them to his own pride, they’ll always find their way back to each other no matter what.
And even if they were predestined to lose each other over and over again, even if they weren’t ever meant to end up together, they’ll forever keep each other’s untouchable memory and precious existence safe within their hearts. Always and forever.
Because how could they ever truly pretend they didn’t mean anything to each other and forget the one they once wholeheartedly trusted with every aching fiber and heart-song of their devoted soul?
For what was the beatitude of their past harmonies and heartstrings, each one a cosmic chorus that sang their name like a prayer, without the extraordinary awe of belonging?
And why in any life wouldn’t they cherish and adore each other’s precious imperfections with the warmth of coming home to their best-friend/better-half?
And wasn’t the holy treasure and kaleidoscope of true love the purest thing that overcame any potential prejudice?
For why wouldn’t they miss the universe of their heart that treated them as a living being worthy of being seen?
Besides- what was love without heartfelt remembrance?
