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An update on that charity auction thing (or, how I spent several months constructing elaborate headcanons about undercover agent air hostesses instead of just writing the damn fic)

Point the first: I still have not written the auction-winner's fic which I owe from way back in January. Her request called for case fic starring one of UNCLE's recurring female cast, such as Sarah Johnson or Heather McNabb, which was all well and good.

The sensible thing for me to do at this point would probably have been to churn out something starring Sarah, who is My Favourite and the much better developed of the two (I've had half-an-idea for something along those lines for ages). Heather (who, for all her established qualifications, mostly seems to be stuck being the girl back at the office who answers the phone) gives you far less to work with character-wise -- so little that the question of how to make a case-fic starring her work at all struck me as a real conundrum.

Unfortunately, I never can resist a good conundrum, and that's the long and short of how I found myself mentally committed to filling out that auction fic the hard way.

I could ramble on about the process here,* but the bottom line is that I've had the thing basically plotted out since around, oh, May or June or so, minus a few key details that remain sticking points (like a rather infuriating innocent-shaped-hole in the story). It was there that it dawned on me that one of the little details I really ought to have pinned down about Heather herself -- at least in my head, whether or not it came up in the story -- was the dangling question of just who her roommate was.

Some context: among the few things we do learn about Heather in her very first appearance is this bit of dialogue from Napoleon:

Napoleon: Oh, no, Heather's been with us almost a year. She used to be a stewardess. She rooms with--

But Waverly cuts him off there, so we never hear who she rooms with -- let alone why Napoleon might thing it worth mentioning to his superior.

Knowing Napoleon, the obvious answer is that Heather rooms with some other attractive young woman he has dated, or would like to date -- perhaps another beautiful UNCLE girl (or stewardess). All the same, I spent some time casting for alternate possibilities before my brain inevitably went, "Well, duh, it's Wanda Townsend from S3 -- the other stewardess-cum-UNCLE-staffer, who very nearly became Heather herself? Who else would it be?"

This would call for a little context from what has become my specialty subject in the land of fandom trivia, the women of UNCLE. See, back before May Heatherly was cast as Heather McNabb, the role very nearly went to an actress called Sharyn Hillyer, who had a small role in the UNCLE pilot as the stewardess on the plane with Napoleon in the final scene (pic on the left below). I'm halfway-convinced that line I just quoted about how Heather used to be a stewardess could very well be an artifact leftover from when Hillyer was in the lead for the role, by way of explaining to the audience why a woman we'd last seen playing a stewardess was suddenly working for UNCLE as of episode 2 (it's certainly more interesting than to assume the writers were simply going "how can we make this sexy woman even MORE sexy to our straight-male-target-audience?" -- which it might still be, but I digress).

Hillyer's story on UNCLE doesn't end there, however, because she was eventually cast as a recurring UNCLE girl (the affore-mentioned Wanda Townsend) starting with The Indian Affairs Affair at the end of S2. But by Indian Affairs, Hillyer was actually making her third appearance in the show -- just 4 episodes previously, she'd appeared as another stewardess in The Project Deephole Affair (pic on the right above).

There's nothing remarkable about the same actress getting called back for multiple different roles in a show like UNCLE, of course, but the neat thing about Hillyer's parts is that you can so easily headcanon them them all into the same character. Her stewardess character from the pilot certainly seems to know Napoleon -- perhaps even who he works for -- and though it's subtler in Project Deephole, I always did like the idea she might just have been an UNCLE plant there too, helping keep an eye on the episode's hapless innocent. Heck, if UNCLE (read: probably Napoleon) canonically recruited one stewardess into their regular staff with Heather, why shouldn't there be more?

Now, I reiterate, to this point I have already dedicated north of 4K words to the subject of these characters and their place in UNCLE, from every obvious angle (and a number of less obvious). But so habituated had I become to thinking of the various Wandas as underdeveloped punchlines, and of the 60's stewardess as a one-dimensional male fantasy, that I am ashamed to admit it was only now that it hit me: recruiting stewardesses as UNCLE staff isn't just a convenient backstory for a couple of bit-parts, it's an act of genius!

Not seeing it? Let me explain!

To start with, the stewardess is the perfect courier. She might travel anywhere in the world as part of her daily routine, carrying items on and off the plane without half the fuss facing the average traveler. If there's a person of interest among the passengers, the stewardess is the one person on the plane who can walk by his seat a dozen times in an hour without looking the least bit suspicious, who can "helpfully" take an interest in whatever he's doing. Many in the job speak multiple languages, and what better job to give you familiarity with locations across the country, if not the world? Finally, after all that time in customer service, she'll have ample practice at sizing people up at a glance, quickly remembering names and faces, and maintaining a cheery smile no matter how much stress she's under (which may well include real life-or-death situations, given that air safety in the 60s was not what it is today). All invaluable skills for the budding spy!**

And if UNCLE aren't forward-thinking enough to have put all that together long ago, you can bet your liver Napoleon would be the one to rectify it. What better way to pass some microfilm to a courier than to conceal it in a bunch of roses, to be presented to his latest stewardess-girlfriend over dinner (during which he'll ask if she's ever been to Paris -- oh, you're scheduled to fly out this week? You must try this little shop -- let me write down the address -- ask for Jean-Louis, drop my name if you need to -- you won't regret it, I promise).

Heather may well have been one of his first recruits. This is all ancient history by the time we meet her, of course, as she's long since transferred to UNCLE New York full time (where, if her first bio is to be believed, she's since been promoted to head of Communications). Maybe she even personally recommended Wanda to Napoleon as another recruit. Wanda herself started out in nursing before moving to aviation (which was actually the normal career path for stewardesses back in the 30's, and far from unheard of even in the 50's and 60's -- neatly explaining how Wanda is qualified to give Napoleon all those shots in My Friend the Gorilla). Wanda was obviously spent at least a good couple of years working as one of UNCLE's stewardess-air-couriers, given she's in the same job from the pilot right up until late S2, But by this point, Heather had long-since disappeared from the office (probably transferred to some other UNCLE office elsewhere in the world), and the New York office was short-staffed, so this would be when Napoleon talks Wanda into transferring to the office full time.

This is also where it all starts to go wrong. Napoleon, inveterate flirt that he is, leaves Wanda with the impression that he wasn't just offering her a transfer, he was also asking her to go steady -- and when it comes right down to it, both of them were a little at fault for that bit of miscommunication. Gentleman that he is, Napoleon did his best not to let her down when he realised the mistake (see: dates mentioned in Monks of St Thomas and Pop Art). But truthfully he just wasn’t that into Wanda, and got far too much use out of charm in the field (see: Do It Yourself Dreadful) to stay faithful very long. (Sharyn Hillyer herself once suggested that the particular joy Wanda takes out of sticking Napoleon with all those needles in Gorilla was a subtle little bit of revenge for all that cheating, and I don't think I can add much to that.) But by the end of the season, she's come to terms with the reality of the situation. (Maybe she has a rebound office-fling with Paul Westcott, guaranteeing maximum shadenfreude when Napoleon inevitably found out about her new beau).

No-one else at UNCLE has any great sympathy for Napoleon through all this. It may not have been entirely his own fault, but he absolutely brings it on himself.

(FWIW, feel free to adopt any part of all that needlessly-elaborate headcanon for your own fic use if you like it. I mean, I’d like to hear about it if you do, but c'mon -- now that I've put the idea in your head, there's just no way Napoleon isn't recruiting stewardesses to UNCLE's cause, is there?)

All well and good, but jumping back several topics, it is now still over 6 months since I promised that fic, and excited as I am by all this backstory, I am no closer to having anything to show for it. What the hell, thought I, even if there isn't a proper fic in all this, surely I can at least get a short prelude ficlet about how Heather was originally recruited to UNCLE out of it. I'll still have the case-fic to write, but I should be able to bang it out quickly as a quick apology to my requester for making her wait so long.

Naturally, this was my cue to... start furiously researching the world of the 60's stewardess, buy two different books, track down a library copy of a third, watch a few documentaries and generally get myself so excited over the research aspect that the fic still hasn't been written.

Over air hostesses. No, I know. I was not expecting this either.

But easy as it is to write them off as an outdated male fantasy, the world of the 60′s stewardess turned out to be a mess of fascinating contradictions -- not to mention a truly enlightening (and frequently horrifying) window into the world of Cold War gender politics. In an era when aviation was still something new, exciting and prohibitively expensive to the masses, it's hard to overstate how much it meant to some of these women just to have the opportunity to fly. So many applied for every opening that the airlines could pick and choose. Many if not most had college educations, spoke two or even more languages -- a small handful even had pilots licenses, but the airlines wouldn't hire female pilots, so they took the next best thing.

Yet for all their qualifications, no-one could hope to be hired if she didn't meet the airline's exacting beauty standards, and girls could be fired for no more than putting on a few pounds or turning up in the wrong underwear. They were 'acceptable' to mores of the day only because they played a suitably servile role, usually for no more than a year or two before leaving the job to get married (wedded stewardesses were, of course, forbidden) -- but a minority still made the work into a lifelong career, used their salaries to buy homes and independence, and their image in the fight for feminist causes. And for all that the airlines had originally hired women in the belief they'd be that much less likely to unionise and make trouble, there seems to have almost never been a time before these women had begun fighting for their rights. My reading list includes two different personal accounts from former stewardesses, both of whom worked 5 years for the same airline, barely a decade apart, and their experiences could hardly be more diametrically opposed. It's fascinating.

...and 2K more words of meta later, I still have not written my fic.

It's coming, I promise. It’s just not exactly written just yet. >.>

(Quite possibly there is yet another post’s worth of shameless history-geek-out over the world of the airline stewardess coming too, but that shouldn’t surprise anyone at this point.)

* Did I mention I also spent some of those months finishing a PhD and starting a new full-time job again for the first time in years? I don’t mention this to boast, it’s just, well, that sort of thing does get a bit distracting. Ahem.

** Lest you imagine I’ve come up with anything remotely original here, I’d point out that while researching the topic, I also discovered that idea of stewardesses as spies was a major plot point in the short-lived 2011 series Pan Am. It wasn’t a particularly great show -- I barely made it two episodes in -- but it did spark enough online discussion that I have seen former flight attendants (and various other commentators) both dismiss it as ridiculous, and suggest there was no way it didn’t happen -- especially once regular commercial Russian flights began. So take that as you will.

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