#heizelmoof

[heizelberg]

Girls' Night by First Rate People (by firstratepeople)

can't help but head bop to this song:)

H

[heizelberg]

08062012

this is me singing a karen carpenter song. hope ya'll like it:)

H

[heizelberg]

ON ONE'S OWN

06272012

a lot has been going on lately, both nice & not so nice. i have been so blessed with really great times & challenged with rough ones. it is however true that when things are fine, something bad happens. and when bad things happen, good things arise.

it is crazy though how we always find ways to prevent one's own depression. we tend to be critical about ourselves & yet we never fail to manage to escape.it gets to us so bad that we tend to do what is supposed to be wrong. it makes things seem right though, especially if it's the only way we could release everything that we've been keeping inside. you can spend a lifetime & if you're honest with yourself, never once was your doing perfect. i am happy being able to show who i really am, regardless of how i do it & regardless of how other people would react. their opinions are no longer my problem at any rate.

it feels like hell when other people think they know who you are, when in fact, they find it so hard to realize who you have become. i believe that it is only weakness that complains of what is below par. so who are we to speak for someone else?

being human is the continuing battle for one's life. once you comply to some agreement, you can never cancel it & put things back the way they are. compromise is but the sacrifice of one right or good in the hope of retaining another, often ending in the loss of both. it is quite difficult to be put in a situation wherein you become the very core of all things. it is when everything & everyone go against what you believe is well for you. to live by the standards set by other people can never make anyone free. having said that, it is so unfair to live a life we can't call ours.

those who seek for much are left in want of much. satisfaction lies in the effort, not in the attainment. i would like to think i'm pleased with everything that i have now, but, it is by being finical that i grow. i am never sure of my own correctness & with that, i learn so many things. i can never want to be self-righteous. as the saying goes, if you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain. we cannot change anything until we accept it. most of the time, when we know our constraints, we tend to go beyond them. that's one thing we all have to understand. that there is change. it happens. 

i realized that the worth of a person, or a thing, or an idea, is in being. not in doing, not in having. 

H

[heizelberg]

I AM THE MOON

You are The Moon

Hope, expectation, Bright promises.

The Moon is a card of magic and mystery - when prominent you know that nothing is as it seems, particularly when it concerns relationships. All logic is thrown out the window.

The Moon is all about visions and illusions, madness, genius and poetry. This is a card that has to do with sleep, and so with both dreams and nightmares. It is a scary card in that it warns that there might be hidden enemies, tricks and falsehoods. But it should also be remembered that this is a card of great creativity, of powerful magic, primal feelings and intuition. You may be going through a time of emotional and mental trial; if you have any past mental problems, you must be vigilant in taking your medication but avoid drugs or alcohol, as abuse of either will cause them irreparable damage. This time however, can also result in great creativity, psychic powers, visions and insight. You can and should trust your intuition.

What Tarot Card are You? Take the Test to Find Out.

H

[heizelberg]

it's sad that people are so angry that they want more & more people to be like them, feeling good about something really ugly.

[heizelberg]

some people cower & wince & shrink, owing to fear of what people may think. there is one answer to worries like these, people may think what the devil they please. -piet hein

http://www.phys.ufl.edu

[heizelberg]

PUT IN A NUTSHELL

as i go along with this crazy & very complex world, i realized that i shouldn't really have to prove anything, especially to anyone. life will always be comprised with several complications & no one can ever have control of what's gonna happen next. sometimes, just when i thought i knew what to do, other people throw in their expectations & it embroils the situation even more. but i learned not to give in to that anymore. a better way to clear up myself in a web of complexities is to accept my faults & forgive those who have caused me pain. proving something to someone just takes too much of my energy. i wasn't really born to impress or be liked by whoever i come across with. everyone's life story is filled with a lot of sob stories & similarities can be found in their greatness & constancy across individuals. despite these however, no one can claim that their experiences are identical to others on the planet. there is however, one premise that can be told of life, it is that everyone has their own battles to fight. right now, i'm just glad to know exactly where i stand. i'm content without having to prove anything at all. i quite often hear people say that life is what you make of it. that happiness is a choice & not governed by fate. and more than just every so often, i hear people screaming, wailing, in tears of life & how unfair it is. no feel good book or friend being able to deny that which is in the deepest cracks of their souls, nothing is either in their hands or of their own doing. strange to even think about it, but i've grown like that.

H

[heizelberg]

BEHOLDEN

it's been ages since i wrote about how life has been for me. everything that is now, went by so fast. even i, couldn't believe that which happened. things were both unrelenting & kind. but what is it for me now?

this is it. there are no hidden meanings. all that mystical stuff is just what's so.

i know in my heart that i did what i thought i had to do. i am never certain about what could possibly make me happy without having to consider the happiness of the people around me. but then again, i realize, how can i conceivably make others happy when i only have myself to begin with?

events in my recent past were overwhelming (in all ways anyone can think of). emotions were very high. but i tried to keep it altogether. i did my very best not to let appalling things get to me. then i'm only me & with that, i can only do so much. it is never easy to turn aside what the heart tells us. sometimes, no matter how hard we think & rationalize, it is what's within that speaks louder. as to how & why? i may not have an absolute answer.

how can anyone honestly win over their feelings without having to sacrifice a lot? is there really an explanation to all things? if so, is it even possible to realize them right away? and who are we to question an affection?

from all the things that life offered & will still offer me, i am more than thankful for everything that there is. i have my strengths & weaknesses, but what lies beneath is a soul deeply grateful for its existence.

to all those whom i have met, many thanks for sharing life with me :)

H