my immensely cursed/stupid faust crack au
first: mature content warning. this storyline involves sexual themes are largely played for crude humor purposes, so. keep that in mind—
meet heinrich faust. german-jewish professor at ludwig maximillian university, who specializes in anatomy/surgery. intelligent. well-connected. currently struggling with a really bad case of erectile dysfunction
so he travels throughout germany to many doctors, in search of treatment—
but none of it does shit. the viagra isn't working.
he has the world's worst case of erectile dysfunction
then he encounters a strange man named mephistopheles—a doctor, but definitely one who comes off as deeply weird
mephistopheles says that he will cure faust's erectile dysfunction in exchange for his soul
faust, 60 years old and desperate to get it up with the worst possible options agrees to it
then he realizes he's bisexual
i don't know where i was going with this
this was mostly intended as a joke and honestly now that i think about it, it's not nearly as funny as my faust space jam au