Reflections On a Year Gone By
On September 2nd, as my sept-plas finished its 7+ hour trip to Thies, I found myself feeling unexpectedly pensieve and reflective. Normally at the end of a journey in one of those old, smelly, and cramped Peugots I find myself thinking of how numb my tailbone is, how long I’ll have to shower to get the layer of dust off my body, or when I can get a cold drink of water. But this day was different, because I realized I almost a year ago I was coming into Thies for the very first time, about to start this weird and hard and amazing journey called Peace Corps Senegal.
The ride into Thies last September was different in a few ways. First, I was coming in from the airport in Dakar, so from the opposite direction, and second, I was not in an old, smelly, cramped Peugot, but a fancy, air-conditioned Peace Corps bus. Moreso, I had just gotten off an 8-hour plane ride from New York and was experiencing a huge range of emotions from excitement about a new adventure, anxiety about leaving everything I knew behind, and curiosity about everything that was flying past the bus windows.
So much has changed since then. With respect to my physical appearance, my pre-departure buzz cut has grown out to a fairly awkward length giving me an appearance resembling something between Einstein and a practical mother of young children, my legs have gone from Texas tan to Senegal snow-white (yes I live in a very sunny country now but it’s not culturally appropriate to show my thighs, so, yea), and I’ve lost about five pounds of muscle due to the lack of protein in my diet (#ricelifebestlife). My eyebrows are also constantly in caterpillar mode because I hate plucking them and don’t think waxing is a thing down in Kedougou.
I’ve gained a lot of practical skills over the past year, too. Now I know how to make compost, double-dig and amend a garden bed, create a tree nursery, plant trees, graft mangos, citrus, and cashews, create a live-fence, collect and store seeds, identify several west african tree species, patch a punctured bike tube, carry water on my head, do laundry well by hand, oh, and uh… speak a new language! I’ve also gotten pretty good at crossword puzzles and cryptograms but I’m not sure I can put that on my resume.
But beyond these fun, surface level changes, my past year in Senegal has taught me a lot of unexpected lessons about both life in general and myself. Here’s an incomplete list of some of the things I’ve realized through experience.
Having a community is crucial to feeling happy and fulfilled. Before I came to Senegal, I thought I could be perfectly happy being a complete loner. My thought was “I’m an introvert. I love hanging out with my friends but I truly thrive on my own.” I still believe I’m an introvert, and I love spending time by myself, but after experiencing days in my remote village when I feel completely isolated, that thought is no longer true for me. After a day spent completely on my own I feel sort of refreshed but mostly sad. The days where I’m busy with work are my favorite, but the days where I get to spend meaningful time with my neighbors and host family are a close second. Aside from my neighbors and host family, though, I’ve come to rely a lot on my real family, my friends from home, and my new PCV friends a lot. I used to think I could solve every problem on my own, and I used to frequently choose time alone over time with others, but now I really see the value in asking for help and doing things with friends even if it it’s not the most efficient or convenient. I don’t know a better way to say it but relationships are more important to me now than they’ve ever been.
Comparisons get you nowhere. In the backpacking community in the USA, many people know the phrase “Hike Your Own Hike.” If you’re thru-hiking the Appalachian Trail, this basically means don’t pay attention to how many miles others are doing per day, what other people are eating, the gear other people have, etc. If you feel like you’ve done your best at creating a schedule and packing what you need to have a good trip, that’s your hike and you should enjoy it. I think the same thing applies to Peace Corps service… and I supposed life as a whole. Every service is different. Some people choose to spend more time integrating with their community, other people find more joy in focusing on the technical work. Some people like to focus on self improvement and testing their limits in a challenging environment. Some people come to the capital once a week, others are okay at site for a month at a time. Everyone is here for different reasons and everyone will get something different out of their time here, and every village, town, and city will gain something different from their volunteer. Spending too much time dwelling on other volunteers’ work or language level is wasteful and unproductive because each volunteer is totally different. We’re all just hiking our own hikes.
Including someone is one of the kindest things you can do. This has been real for me both in the volunteer community and when I’m on my own at site. Peace Corps is a really hard thing to do and can flip people around mentally. When we’re all just starting out in training or at our sites, it can be stressful and hard to act like our best selves. Some people you meet might come off as annoying or difficult to be around, but they’re probably just going through some difficult shit. Even the simplest offers of asking someone if they’d like to come with you to go shopping, to the bar, or even just to sit with you can make a world of difference. I think this was something I always sort of knew in the back of my mind, but didn’t realize how important it was until I got to my site. It kind of sucks when your whole host family leaves the compound to go watch the World Cup without telling you. But it feels really good when they invite you to come pray with them for religious holidays and ceremonies even though they know you’re not a Muslim, or when your neighbors offer you a chair to sit in even if you’re just passing by. After experiencing both sides, I know I prefer feeling like my presence is appreciated and wanted, and when I feel appreciated and wanted I’m usually more pleasant to be around. It’s just a positive feedback loop. ^_^
To avoid sounding too cheesy I’m cutting off my “lessons” here. I will definitely add to this in the future, but that’s what I wanted to share for now. Basically it’s been a crazy year with a lot of ups and downs but I’m still here, still alive, and trying to make the most of it. I’ll make another post soon to go over what’s been going on throughout the rainy season and post some pictures! Until then, thanks for reading and I hope everyone is having a wonderful Friday. :-)