before she gets to tells him her untangled emotions, she’s briefly distracted by his reaction. so, instead of voicing out her thoughts, laughter becomes her first sentence. ❝ woah, are you okay there? you’re acting like you saw a ghost! ❞ she jests for a moment, letting her glee splinter her nerves. ❝ i guess lucky for both us, i’m not one. so, no possessions tonight. ❞ she concludes her banter with a chuckle, hands shoved into the comforts of her pockets.
she takes one or two steps forward as if distance could aid her. ❝ i’m really not sure if you wanted a reply. but, i only think this is fair. so, even if i’m not good with words, i hope you hear me out. ❞ she starts off, her voice is colored with an array of muted emotions. it was strange. her heart feels so small once hearing those words turn tangible after festering in her mind for long. it was as if the organ signals its fear as if she is exposing too many cards at once.
❝ i been thinking a lot of things for the past days. as weird as it sounds, i thought a lot about you. i thought about how hard you work for your dreams, how much you actually care, how you have a thing for teasing people and even the way you rebel against your diet. ❞ her lips is a smile, similar to the one hanging above them. a waning one. ❝ so, i thought hard on what i could feel for someone who has these many good traits. even if he doesn’t think he has them. ❞
she lets silence fall for a moment. her thoughts trying to gather as a shade of red marries against her cheeks. ❝ first, i shouldn’t have thought so hard because— ❞ she laughs in the middle of it as if it could conceal her growing need to run away, as if it could conceal her withering courage.
❝ because well, ❞ her smile turns into a grin as embarrassment crawls under her skin and threatens her to lose strength. ❝ i only got to confirm many things i already knew. but, at least, i got to realize how i have grown to really like you too, kim seungbin. ❞
Bin could in no way afford the manner in which he gazed over at the girl by his side. The hopeless romantic he was ㅡ the fool that he was ㅡ never once thought one way or another about it. His most notable weakness would surely become his eventual downfall. So long as he still laid eyes on a green light in the distance, he did not particularly mind.
Although someone cautious of his standing with other people, Seungbin lacked any semblance of forethought. The initial action of the confession relied on a certain amount of spontaneity. To throw caution into the proverbial wind before it was too late. Too late for what, he was unsure.
And so ㅡ he stuffed hands in his pockets, unable to find a proper use for them. "Hyunbi." The small utterance of her name was all he could muster. It seemed as though his voice stuffed itself in his pockets as well. Why shouldn't it when his heart rocketed into his throat at that same moment? It feared what he might say in immediate response.
Are you sure? Maybe it's a bad idea. Maybe I should run away to have a scream in an alleyway and come back.
Dizzying thoughts raced through his head with the speed of a bullet. He had no time to sort them, nor push them away. It all became useless once he came to the realization this was no fabrication of his stress ridden mind. Jeon Hyunbi expressed she felt the same ㅡ in person, out loud ㅡ with more certainty than he thought she ever would. Frankly, he felt as if he would curl over and vomit at any second. His reaction came about in a far different manner than expected.
"I... uh..." He finally broke his staring to drift his eyes overhead. Anywhere else. He didn't want to show her how wracked with nerves he truly was. "I'm happy to hear that... That you didn't think it was a joke or really... the other name I wrote." But. He stammered, struggling to find the proper words. Writing them down was a walk in the park comparatively. But... "Then... do...ㅡ What do you want to do... about it," he sighed in frustration at himself. "Sorry. Let's... go... somewhere? Somewhere else? Maybe?"
After finishing his stumble of stringed together sentences, he removed one hand from his pocket with eyes still averted, smile hidden underneath black fabric. It was something of a silent offer.
