XD

austin kwak march 16, 1999 basketball player

[hravstin-blog]

Bin clears his throat quietly before reaching over to tap Austin's shoulder. "Hey! I have a question. Would you mind helping me out?" he smiles slightly, "So, what do you do... if...ㅡ"

he turns around, his face (or more like his lips) was covered in ice cream. slowly, he puts down the ice cream cone and stares at bin with wide eyes. austin waits for him to at least finish the sentence but the pause was a bit unbearing at the moment. he purses his lips slightly as if deep in thought before taking another bite of his ice cream.

“what do i do if...”

finishing off his ice cream before staring blankly at his empty hand that once held his ice cream. taking a minute or two, he realizes that he had finished his ice cream. austin looks up at him and smiles at the other.

“i had another ice cream? is that what you’re trying to ask me, bin?” 

[hravstin-blog]

“It’s not that easy, you know.”

on the basketball court

“yeah...”

austin knows how hard working sangwoon is. being an actor was no surprise by the looks of it. the amount of fangirls being around his close friend, and trying to maintain a certain face was indeed tiring. however, he supports him as much as he can. 

he hands him a water bottle, and sits beside him. drinking the water as he watches the kids play at the nearby park. the place is peaceful looking, despite of the yelling and screaming from the children. nonetheless, it was nice. he places a hand on her shoulder, patting it a couple of times. 

“i may not know what to say but you know i’ll always be here for you right? even if i do spend most of my time with karin, i’ll make time for you... whenever you are free.”

[hravstin-blog]

“It’s not that easy, you know.”

on the basketball court

“i’m sorry to hear...” 

he wasn’t sure what to say, instead he looks down at the container that he had bought over for her to have. the restaurant had a bit of leftover food so he decided to take the remaining food. he didn’t really want it, rather he wanted to give it to a friend of his. now he wasn’t sure if he should be giving her the food. 

instead, he slides himself across the table as he ends up sitting across from her. he didn’t know what else to do, other than give his support or at least just be a listening ear for her. putting the container on the table, he slides it to her. 

“i may not know what to say for the meantime but.. if you were to tell me more, maybe i could say or help out? it’s not good to keep to keep quiet, it’s usually best to let it out when you need to...” 

[hravstin-blog]

what does one give to a boyfriend? the idea boggles her mind. it wasn’t as if they haven’t celebrated their time together just as friends before this, but she wishes for it to be all the more meaningful now that they’re together. so had the girl pondered this a few days into their day together? she certainly has. it didn’t lead to many creative things, from one decisive moment to another. but eventually the girl had decided on something she felt would be useful for their time apart.

❝ hey austin, ❞ she speaks softly to him, voice gentle and calm when she walks up to him. it’s nice that it’s a weekend, as if fate has collided everything together so that the two of them would be able to spend much of the day together. she wouldn’t steal him from his family for long, just the whole afternoon – or maybe that was a decent amount. 

❝ i wasn’t sure when was the right time to give this to you but… ❞ past lunch, past dessert and now that the two of them are wandering around the park now, hand entwined and attention dancing here and there.  ❝ at this rate i’m going to forget so…here! ❞

from out of her inner jacket pocket she pulls out the box that has been in her mind for a while. it’s not wrapped, mostly because the girl is far too eager to have him test it out on the spot. ❝ open it! ❞

so she waits for him to do so, cellphone hidden in her other hand. it is when he opens it that she presses enter, allowing the message to appear on the screen inside the box. 

♥ happy birthday to my beloved ♥ this is for when the moments when we’re apart so i can always show you how much i love you

❝ now spin the heart! spin it! ❞ she excitedly speaks. this time the phone is eagerly shown to him, letting the boy see how hearts scatter across her own screen at his action. she grins, eyes curling into half-crescents.   ❝ it’s perfect for us isn’t it? ❞

when his friends asked if they could hang out due to celebrating his birthday, he objected. when his manager asked him to fill someone’s shift, he objected too. not that he didn’t want to hang out with his friends, or not go to work to earn some extra cash, he just wanted to celebrate his birthday. not like the past years, where they celebrate this special day as friends. instead they are celebrating it as a couple for the first time in years since the feelings surfaced. 

he already told his parents that he was going to be with karin instead of them, but for sure he will be there at night to celebrate his birthday with them. after eating lunch with her, he didn’t want to leave her, or more like he didn’t want to leave her side as they continue to walk around the park. possibly he could ask her to have dinner with his family, not like they don’t know who she was. his thoughts were interrupted and he smiles at karin when she calls out his name.

“hm?” 

he listens to her speak, and continues to smile at her. he glances at the present, and takes the box from her hands. honestly speaking, he wasn’t expecting a gift from her. he just wanted to spend time with her and that was it. to him, that was the greatest gift that could be given to him. he opens the gift carefully as if it was really precious to him.

to his surprise, a message appears inside the box and he reads it, a smile forms again, and he chuckles softly. 

“thank you, karin. i love it a lot.” 

he purses his lips, before spinning the heart and watching her phone gets scattered across her own screen. another chuckle escapes his mouth and he wraps his arms around her. his cheek on top of her head and hugs her tightly. 

“it is perfect for us, thank you again karin. thank you for giving me one of the best gifts that could be given to me today.” 

[hravstin-blog]

“You seem so perfect. I don’t get it.”

on the basketball court

“me… perfect?” 

he chuckles softly, reaching over to hold her hand in his. austin knew that he wasn’t perfect. perfection isn’t something everyone is born with but can be molded into to as years go by society’s standards.

“but you know… i couldn’t have been perfect…”

he smiles innocently as an idea pops up in his head. when he’s with his friends, he tries to not be as cheesy towards karin. he just didn’t want his friends to somewhat judge him for... that side of him. thankfully, it was just the two of them, as boyfriend and girlfriend and spending time with each other. 

“what i think is that…”

his heart skips a beat. was he really going to go through with this? he already started part of his sentence and there’s no turn back now at this rate.

“i’m only perfect, because you’re here with me. it’s like... a puzzle, we are two puzzle pieces that are put together since we fit with each other. karin... we... are meant to be together... and... and..”

his eyes widens into the blank expression he always have whenever his friends teases him about certain things or the amount of times they suspected that he liked karin in the past before they were official.

“i love you. that is why i seem perfect to you because we’re perfect for each other.” 

[hravstin-blog]

“Why are you afraid of saying I love you?”

on the basketball court

the question that had many questioned him as it was pretty obvious that he had a minor crush on karin. the multiple of times when he wanted to say ‘i love you,’ he never managed to do it as the words always get stuck in his throat. but he always turns away from those words or tries to change the topic. however, he acted as if he didn’t know who he was referring to.

“me...? afraid of saying i love you to who?” 

the act he just put on, hopefully junjae wouldn’t have caught it. even if he did, what harm could it do to the both of them? but he did wonder, why he never really said ‘i love you,’ to karin, possibly as a friend, but he knew it was more than a friend. was he afraid to tell her to ruin their friendship, or was it something else? hopefully, one day he would be able to say those three words to her. but for now, he will keep up with the act.

“i love my mom, dad and sister. i always say that to them. i don’t know who else would you be thinking i would say i love you to...” 

[hravstin-blog]

"hey austin!" hyunbi greets him with a hint of cheer. she sits beside him, hands resting on her knees. "you know, there's something i been wanting to confess to you for a long time." her tone lowers a pitch, lips pressed as if she is afraid the secret will jump out. "you see..."

he was working on his homework until he hears his friend calling for him. austin smiles slightly as she sits beside him, and he glances over at her. he purses his lips and blinks blankly at her. he closes his laptop and readjusts himself. he places his hand against his head and his elbow on the table, as if he’s leaning slightly on the table.

“confession..? what is it hyunbi…?” 

he then stares at her blankly, and purses his lips slightly. her tone of voice scares him slightly, he wasn’t sure if he was ready for what she wants to tell him. but he tries to prepare himself in case it was something that he fears the most. 

“is your confession something to do with…. sangwoon...?”  

[hrhall]

DEEP STARTERS

Feel free to change these into threads!

“What’s holding you back?”

“I’m not comfortable with this conversation.”

“Will you /ever/ be comfortable with this conversation?”

“Let me in sometime!”

“It’s not that easy, you know.”

“Help me understand.”

“It’s hard to connect with someone when all they do is push you away.”

“Why are you always so cold?”

“Why are you always so happy?”

“Are you really happy now?”

“Who hurt you this badly to make you this way?!”

“What, did your ex mess you up that badly?!”

“Why do you keep fighting it any time you feel?”

“It’s a problem, I get it.”

“This is all kinds of messed up.”

“That’s not exactly a good coping method.”

“So what happened, with your parents, really?”

“What was your childhood like?”

“Everyone has at lest a bit of family issues. It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

“My parents aren’t exactly perfect models, either.”

“You were bullied? What for?”

“Was it hard? Coming out, I mean.”

“You can’t just run away all the time.”

“You can’t just hide all the time.”

“Are you still thinking about them?”

“I’m not the enemy here. But this makes me wonder who the real one is for you.”

“Is the reason you’re so cold and defensive because you feel threatened?”

“How long has it been since you last spoke to them?”

“You never talk about it, why?”

“How come you’re so different around them?”

“It’s like you don’t have a care or worry in the world.”

“You seem so perfect. I don’t get it.”

“What was your ex like?”

“I don’t think I was ever good enough for them.”

“Are you not comfortable being intimate?”

“Why don’t you feel comfortable being intimate?”

“Letting someone see you that vulnerable, it’s a scary thing.”

“Are you scared of being hurt?”

“Have you ever been taken advantage of?”

“Why are you afraid of saying I love you?”

“I never understood how someone could say those words so easily.”

“You’re hurting others the way you’ve been hurt in the past, don’t you think that’s ironic?”

“You use people to make yourself feel better.”

“I’m scared of being used again…”

“Losing someone isn’t easy, but you’re making it harder than it needs to be.”

“How long has it been since you lost them?”

“You’re too attached.”

“I’m not attached, I’m just comfortable with what I’m familiar to.”

“Maybe the real reason you’re so controlling is because, deep down you’d rather have them in your grasp than lose them.”

“Why did you ever break up?” / “Why did we ever break up?”

[hravstin-blog]

hryongnam‌:

                                          ｡☆✼★━━━━━━━━━━━━★✼☆｡

     the smile on yongnam’s face grows bigger when austin accepts his sudden appearance without complaints. it does however falter slightly at the comment. which he knows austin has a great point that he should listen to but yongnam didn’t have enough confidence to ask. also he had been worried it would look bad on the boy if he had just barged in and made himself comfy in a place where he wasn‘t buying any food for the day or working there. it was only a home at the right time in the right situations.

     “…it’s fine,” he tells austin, doing his best to keep up his smile. “i didn’t want long and i didn’t want to bother the restaurant when it’s so busy. i’ll do it next time if it’s quieter.” which was probably going to be a lie but it felt like a good thing to say right now. maybe one day he’ll have enough confidence to actually ask things outside of the usual requests. and then he’ll tell austin about it too. for sure.

     “but i am hungry. are you?” yongnam does his best to redirect the topic back to what he had in mind in the first place. “we should go eat. you must have worked really hard today too…i noticed how crowded it was. i’ll treat you so pick where you want to go.”

                                          ｡☆✼★━━━━━━━━━━━━★✼☆｡ 

“alright...” 

he nods his head and continues to smile. for sure, he’ll probably let his manager know that it will be okay for yongnam to just sit in the lobby. but that’s for next time, or when his next shift is. as he exhales, his breathe slowly forms a small cloud and austin buries half his face into his scarf. 

he tilts his head to the side and blinks blankly for a bit. was it a special occasion that yongnam was treating him to food? however, once he heard what the other had said, he chuckles softly.

“i don’t think i worked too hard... but if you insist in treating... i don’t see why not.” 

a grin forms and he glances around, pursing his lips. where could they go to for dinner? austin didn’t really want to go somewhere too expensive, he didn’t want yongnam to waste too much money either. probably at a street vendor would be a better choice. there were too many things he should consider which makes him indecisive on what his final thoughts are. 

“should we just... go to a street vendor because you know... i wouldn’t want you to spend too much money.” 

[hravstin-blog]

shots fired // @hrkarin

had she been waiting? yes, karin had certainly been waiting for him to ask her, and she also held enough trust in him to know that he would probably do it. however, at the same time she was a bottle of nerves waiting patiently as each day passed by. it wasn’t as if she wouldn’t have gone if he didn’t ask, but she still wanted something nonetheless because somewhere in her heart that was the only way to feel right.

the caller id which appears has the girl scrabbling for the phone on her desk, almost dropping it along with her textbooks in her hurry. in a clumsiness that would probably have her coach clicking her tongue repeatedly in disappointment, karin brings the phone to her ear.

❝ oh hi austin! what’s up? ❞ act casual, she reminds herself as she awaits him to say what he needed to say. though he can’t see her, the reaction is instant. she grins happily, easing herself from the straight back pose she had been sitting in originally to sprawl across the desk.

❝ well, that’s what i thought.❞ but just as she answers, she wonders if she’s mistaking it and an unease takes over. immediately she sits up again. her heart pounds rapidly, for a different reason. ❝ unless…you have someone else? ❞

of course he didn’t have someone else in mind. not when karin was almost the one that he thinks about 24/7.  if someone had asked him if they could go to the ball together, he would have objected kindly to them. it’s not that he didn’t want to go with a friend of his, but he would preferably go with her. 

even if they haven’t seen each other for just a couple of hours, he misses her voice. his heart skips a beat like usual but he tries to act casual. plopping onto his bed, after turning on his computer, he smiles softly and nods. however, his eyes widens slightly when she mentioned if he had someone else. 

“n-no!” 

he squeaks slightly before covering his mouth. usually austin doesn’t even squeak. but he was caught slightly off guard with how his voice just cracks. austin clears his throat quietly and laughs, trying to brush it off.

“no karin, i don’t have someone else. i--” 

he cuts himself off again. how many mistakes has he made since they’ve been talking for the past couple of minutes. maybe, he was just too close, or maybe he just rushing this at this point. maybe he shouldn’t ask her what he’s been wanting to ask her all along.

“i’ll pick you up at 6, will that be okay with you?” 

[hravstin-blog]

hrsangwoon‌:

It was rare for Sangwoon to feel remorseful for his actions. He was not coldhearted and senses how the other’s helpless expression pulled his heartstrings. Even if he felt the pinching tinge, his disappointment on Austin’s response was greater and clouded his actions. So, he was more compelled to bother the younger.

“I never said that. I said it was a bad idea to come to me. That’s it.” He states with a monotone ring. His hands move to settle on the boy’s shoulders, pressing firmly. “So, like you are ignoring my words, I will too. So, how about you tell me? You will hear my truthful opinion about it and then you can later thank me. How about that?” His voice gains fluidness as a smirk marks his curiosity.

“since it is a bad idea to come to you, maybe it is... but i was not ignoring your words.” 

he laughs nervously and steps aside from the other. even though sangwoon is older than him, austin does feel a bit.. more like slightly intimidated by the other. he sighs softly before shrugging his shoulder a couple of times. he wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to ask but he is asking a close friend for advice.

“if you insist... i was wondering if it is a good idea to go out with someone that you... ” 

[hravstin-blog]

hrkarin‌:

sometimes, karin notices how austin seems to cut himself off. sometimes he also seems to want to say something more but he holds himself back — she would be a liar if she said she didn’t know what he had in mind. but the boy wouldn’t say it and she didn’t hold enough confidence in everything to say it for him. for what if karin was wrong? the thought itself is something terrifying that she’s not about to risk it.

so the girl decides to pretend that she didn’t hear anything amiss. she acts normal as karin always is around him because that is the best form their relationship could take right now.  ❝ oh…right popcorn, ❞ her head tilts, lightly bumping into his shoulder when he makes that comment. ❝ we will make an exception for popcorn. because what’s watching shows without the sacred popcorn? ❞

it’s also because she happens to know that he likes popcorn — she’d be a devil to block him from that!! at his suggestion she gives a small hum, it’s become some quiet agreement after much fussing earlier into their friendship that karin would just go with what he says. causes the least amount of hassle and no battling at the cashier. squeezing his hand a few times she nods.

❝  okay! we’re almost there anyways. but any requests beside popcorn? ❞

he smiles at her. the temptation of leaning in to possibly peck on the top of her head crosses his mind but he resists. there are so many things he wanted to do other than hold hands with karin but he always resists. the thing that always crosses his mind is that they are not together. 

“you are right, watching a show without popcorn... is like... it has an empty feeling.” 

he notices how she squeezes his hand a few times. letting go of her hand, he wraps his arm around her body to bring her closer to him. also, it felt a bit cold and he just wanted to somewhat keep her warm. it was an innocent act. austin purses his lips, when the other asks if he wanted any requests. another thought crosses his mind, and he almost blurted that he wanted.... 

“well, you said gimbap.. should we grab some sides too... or... ramyeon...?” 

[hravstin-blog]

shots fired // @hrbin

Seungbin’s head swiveled around on delayed instinct to meet gazes with the doe-eyed boy known as Austin. His features faltered temporarily only to twist into an expression of confusion. “Yeah, sure, but, uh…” – he leaned in, scratching his neck – “You’ve kinda gotta finish asking the question first, dude.”

“oh right..”

he chuckles nervously. already meeting his friend earlier that day and them stating that it was a bad idea. he decided not to ask the other now. it would probably end up being a bad idea anyways. 

“actually... nevermind, i don’t think it’ll work out anyways! i’m sorry to bother you!” 

[hravstin-blog]

shots fired // @hrsangwoon​

Sangwoon’s initial reaction was to reject the other’s request. After all, there was nothing that gave him more pleasure than to poke some fun at him. Yet, his desire to tease the boy falters when he hears the tone of his voice.

His expression remains unchanged as he nods to encourage the other to continue. “Austin, I can’t help you if you are only going to tell me that. I mean, if you are asking if it was a good idea to come to me…” He stops for a moment to add dramatization. “No, probably not.”

“oh...” 

he purses his lips together, his doe-like expression of confusion as he stares blankly at sangwoon. maybe he shouldn’t ask the other if it was a good idea. maybe what he had planned for the next couple of days would be a bad idea in the end. austin smiles weakly and shakes his head.

“maybe it is a bad idea since you already know that coming to you is a bad idea! so nevermind then, i won’t do it! thank you for your help! ”

[hravstin-blog]

hrkarin‌:

was that what she wanted? she doesn’t quite know, it has been blurted out right at the second. there was a strong voice inside her which had decided right at that moment that it really wanted him to stay no matter what. so though he had come to pick her up for class — it was now going to be her turn to keep him away from school!!

❝ yes! yes i want you to stay. something like that? ❞ she skips the words she has mentioned at first, her own face turning scarlet as karin leans closer to him until shoulders touch shoulder. she does her best to look as cute as possible to convince him — as if he really needed anymore convincing!!

❝ sure. we should get some snacks, so we don’t have to move around for the rest of the day. what do you think? ❞ karin echoes with her own agreement, relaxing into his hand’s hold. ❝ something easy to eat…so no microwave either. maybe we can get some gimbap from the convenience store? ❞

“then i’ll stay with you... always and... fo...”

he cuts himself off from saying the last part, maybe he would have come a bit too strong if he did say it. he could have scared her away and that would have been devastating if that was the case. once their shoulders touch with each other, something inside him feels like he was going to explode. how cute can she be around him? how can he even handle her cuteness. but in the end, she is cute and... perfect to him. 

“not even popcorn?” 

he raises his eyebrow slightly. if he had to binge on eating something at home, it’s usually popcorn, despite of his father scolding at him for making his room smell like popcorn. another snack that he usually would eat would be chips as well. however, he was certain that his family wasn’t anywhere near home so they can just watch it on the big television without the awkwardness of his parents walking in on them at odd times. 

“how about... we go to the convenience store, and you can buy whatever you want. i’ll pay for it. what do you say?” 

[hravstin-blog]

                   – SHE HAD NEVER been in this neighborhood before, had never thought she would ever have to venture through these streets which overflowed with the word “wealth,” something she thought she left long ago when she came to Korea. 

Yet here was surrounded by it as she walked up to the door of the person she had written down on her paper as being the recipient of this song. As the other person opens the door, she puts a smile on her face and utters the words her company drilled into her as they were preparing for this. 

❛ Hello, my name is Fumie and I’m a trainee for Nightblue, someone you know has ordered you a song this Valentine’s and I’m here to deliver it with the utmost enthusiasm, I hope you enjoy it.❜  

With her guitar in hand, she begins to sing and play “Moonlight” by Ariana Grande to this person she had just met moments prior.  

he was getting ready to deal with his own valentines. austin has something planned for that day, and he wants it to be exactly perfect. or more towards to somewhat perfection. as long as it goes as planned, it would be fine for him.

still preparing for that day, even though it is weeks in advance, he hears his doorbell ring. he wasn’t expecting anyone, so why did his door ring? he quickly goes and checks his phone to see if anyone left him a message. to his surprise, no one contacted him either, mentioning that they were coming over. at this point, he was just confused. 

shrugging his shoulder, he walks to the door to open it. once he the door, there stood a female, and austin tilts his head head slightly. before he could answer, he listens to what the female had said and he nods. 

“oh…” 

another surprise. today was probably just filled with surprises. he listens to her sing. it was beautiful and he enjoys it a lot. once she was finished, he claps his hands together. 

“thank you, fumie. i really like it, you have an amazing voice. i hope you can debut soon. i would love to buy your albums if possible.”

he purses his lips slightly, feeling a bit awkward. what was he supposed to do after receiving the song? he tilts his head again and steps aside as if he was inviting her to his home.

“you.. are you… do i need to… give you something? i can… give you some food if you want… as a thank you… that is.” 

[hravstin-blog]

HEY. Austin Kwak? ...MORE LIKE... AUSTIN BAWK. LIKE A SCAREDY CHICKEN!

“did i do something that upset you, hana?” 

austin wasn’t sure where that comment came from. maybe something that he did to the younger girl recently made her mad at him. he tries to think about how he might have made hana made but nothing was really coming up. 

“you know... if there is something i did that made you mad or upset you in anyway, you can tell me. i would like to fix whatever i did wrong so we won’t have any bad feelings towards each other.”