#human tricks

[bestythesmalls-blog]

Having thumbs means: Never having to wait for dad to get home to have a bacon treat. 

[painfullymeta]

[sspacegodd]

Pippi tries to pick herself up.

[painfullymeta]

(via Guy Spends Almost A Year Gluing 42,000 Matches To Make A Giant Sphere, Sets It On Fire | Bored Panda)

[bestythesmalls-blog]

Human Tricks: Betsy’s bath.

Betsy felt gross. Her skin was oily and her hair was limp and dull looking and a careful sniff at her clothes confirmed that she stunk. As a dog bathes were occasional and dad kept track of when they were needed. Now, it was up to her and she ransacked dad’s clothes for something clean to put on and made her way to the bathroom. She could do this, how hard could it be?

She turned the taps like she had watched her dad do and after fiddling and fumbling she managed to get water coming out that was not boiling lava hot or glacier run off cold. It took her a bit to figure out how to work the drain stopper but eventually the tub began to fill. Dad only used a little water when she was a dog so she reasoned the water amount should be proportional to the body size and since she was much much bigger now she let the tub fill....and fill....and fill....She turned the taps off when the tub was a little over half full and got undressed and carefully sat down in the water watching as the water level rose and just barley kept from over flowing. Apparently she used to much, but it was slowly going down thanks to the over flow drain. 

Washing couldn't be that hard, and she grabbed the bar of soap dunking it in the water. It instantly became slick and shot out of her hand when she tried to hold onto it. She laughed and spent a few fun minutes just trying to learn to wrangle the soap and making it shoot out of her hands just for the fun of it before rubbing it onto her skin and splashing in the tub to rinse off. 

Washing her hair....umm...yeah that was not as easy to figure out, and the realization she would have to lay back to get her hair wet was mildly terrifying. Cautiously she leaned back, inching down holding onto the edge of the tub for dear life, then sat up as soon as she thought it was wet enough. She rubbed the bar of soap into her hair vigorously till the lather was rolling down her face, and she learned a very very valuable lesson about soap getting into her eyes. It stung so much, and she was left blind and panicking trying to figure out how to fix the situation, wiping the suds off her face as they ran down it. There was nothing for it she had to put her face in the water, her whole head in the water. The pain was enough of a motivator but she was terrified. She lay back again and held her breathe sinking down...and down...and down..till she was under. She swished her head from side to side to get ride of the bubbles and came up up gasping and swiping at her face. She had water in her nose, her eyes still stung and she was getting cold. She scooted forward and turned the taps again, and carefully adjusted them and stuck her face under the running water, then her head to get the last of the soap out of her hair, then pulled the drain stopper. 

Soaking wet, eyes scratchy and red she carefully climbed out of the tub and tried to shake off the water, before pulling on the clean shirt and sweat pants she borrowed from her dad which clung to her still wet skin and were a bitch to pull on. Towels...she forgot to use a towel. She huffed in annoyance too late to do anything about it she resigned her self to just air drying in her clothes and grabbed a comb off the counter beside the sink. 

OW! It had always looked so easy when Dad combed his hair! The comb stuck on a snarl and slipped out of her fingers. When she tried to untangle the comb from her hair, her hair felt crinkly and rough under her fingers instead of soft and smooth like it had been right after she changed. The comb came loose reluctantly and she tried again managing to snap it on the tangles. She gave up, resolved to ask her dad to help her figure out how to comb her hair later she pulled the broken half out of her hair as carefully as she could and padded barefoot out of the bathroom discouraged. Being human was harder then she thought it was going to be....this old dog was going to have to learn a lot of new tricks. 

[painfullymeta]

[texancomics]

[awesomekaybabykay-blog]

An old dog

I have decided to join tumblr in the hopes of this old dog learning some new tricks. Some call me K.C. others call me K, or Kay. I do come when I’m called, well at least some of the time.