Uhh hi, I know its been about 6 months but can I interest y'all in some angsty Helluva Boss fic? It's Stolitz, rated E, Stolas gets hit with a nasty subdrop
https://archiveofourown.org/works/81912036
Summary:
Suddenly everything that Blitzø was doing to him--it just felt dirty. Not sexy.
The change was so abrupt that it took Stolas several sluggish seconds to process it, with his brain as fuck-drunk as it was.
By the time he did, somehow, Blitzø had still not noticed that the demon on the other end of his cock had tipped over from good-bad feelings to bad-bad feelings.
A little voice in Stolas’s head, much louder than the turmoil he was in, whispered, don’t ruin it.
Heyyy I wrote a lil post-mastermind fic for y'all 👉👈
Read on AO3 or under the cut
Stolas had not been sleeping well. It wasn’t anyone’s fault, he was simply too tall for Blitzø’s couch, so besides for his first night on it, when he’d conked straight out due to the stress and exhaustion of almost watching Blitzø get executed, almost getting executed himself, and then instead losing his entire livelihood, powers, and his daughter, he hadn’t been able to catch more than a few unrestful hours a night.
The New Couch
[Psst! The layout of Blitzø's apartment can be found in this Tumblr post.]
Still, he’d rather die than complain. Blitzø had been relegated to a fucking beanbag chair as his bed and he seemed to be sleeping just fine. He appeared chipper as ever, if a little more subdued and gentler, while Stolas spent all his waking hours struggling to focus through a thick fog. He was taking up Blitzø’s sleeping accommodations and he had nothing to show for it.
It was due to Stolas’s sleep deprivation, that when an enormous crash shook the apartment and he peered over the island to see Blitzø coughing and waving dust out of his face, he was sure that everything must have caught up with him, and he was hallucinating.
"Ta-da!" Blitzø said proudly, holding his arms open in a dramatic L shape to present his new uh. Couch. It had landed partially on top of the old one, sending splinters and stuffing flying. Well that explained the dust.
"Why did you get a new couch, Blitz?" Stolas asked, his feathers already ruffling agitatedly. "The one you've already provided me with is fine, I don't wish for you to go into trouble-"
Blitzø waved him off impatiently. "Shut up Stolas, anyone with eyes could see your feet dangling off the edge of that thing. Besides, I was due for an upgrade anyways. I solved the problem by snagging a pullout couch from one of our victim's houses. It has a queen sized mattress all folded up in there, plenty of room for your fancy ass to spread out with room to spare, capiche?"
Stolas capiched. Blitzø had gotten tired of the fact that his bed was not big enough for the two of them and had gotten them one that would be. How silly and rude of Stolas to be accusatory about it.
“Right,” he said. “That makes sense, yes. But why in Hell wouldn’t you move the old one out of the way first?”
Blitzø at least had the grace to look sheepish. “Okay, maybe it was more of a spur of the moment decision. I saw the pullout, I thought it would be nice for you. Look, I’m not a genius like you or Moxxie, you can’t expect me to think everything through. That would fuck up my whole-” he flailed his hands some more. “-thing I’ve got going on.”
Stolas did love Blitzø’s whole “thing” so he refrained from arguing. It was already done, anyways.
“If I still had my magic I could help move the old couch away,” Stolas lamented. “I’m so sorry, Blitz. You’ve done such a sweet thing for me and I can’t even repay you.”
“Hey!” Blitzø leapt towards him, vaulting over the room divider and taking Stolas’s dainty hands in his own. “None of that. You don’t owe me anything, alright? It’s okay, Loonie can help me move the couch when she gets home and I’ll portal the old one away, easy peasy no harm no foul.”
It was rather odd, Blitzø appeared to be… blushing. Stolas blinked. That couldn’t be right.
The next second Blitzø got distracted, noticing the novel that was placed open face-down on his kitchen table. “Oh hey! You were reading? That- that’s great, Stols.”
Blitzø smiled at him so disarmingly, that now Stolas was blushing, quite obviously.
“Yes, you picked a rather good one, actually,” Stolas said. In fact, it was so good that this was the first day he’d felt up to doing anything other than sitting on the couch staring aimlessly at the TV. Lucky thing, too. He glanced down at their hands, which were still joined, and gave Blitzø’s a squeeze. “Thank you for that, Blitz.”
“Of course,” Blitzø said, and withdrew his hands, definitely blushing. He hesitated, like he wasn’t sure what to do or say next. That was ridiculous, of course. Stolas had never met anyone, imp or otherwise, who always knew exactly what to do or say in any given instance more than Blitzø did.
“Did you have a good day at work?” Stolas asked, ready to invite Blitzø to sit down with him so that they could talk until Loona returned.
To his disappointment, Blitzø’s eyes widened. “Oh shit, I was totally in the middle of a hit! I left M&M stranded in the human world! Fuuuuuck me.” He grasped Stolas’s face gently and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’ll be home soon with Loona, kay? Just hang tight, enjoy your book.” And then with a flash of a portal, he was gone.
Stolas was left blinking after him stupidly. He raised a shaking hand to his cheek and touched the spot where Blitzø had kissed him.
-------------
The second time Blitzø came home, he did in fact have his daughter in tow. Stolas watched, feeling useless, as they worked together to lift the new couch off the wreckage of the old one. He caught Blitzø’s expression of relief as he fished his horse blanket out of the mess, somehow still entirely intact. Once the new couch was clear of all the wood shards and ripped cushions, Blitzø rubbed his crystal and a portal appeared under the old one. They all watched it fall away into an unidentifiable living room, presumably the one Blitzø had gotten this new piece of furniture from, because it was conspicuously missing anywhere to sit.
“There!” Blitzø clapped his hands together proudly once the portal had closed. “All done, thanks Loony! I’m sure Stolas and I can figure the rest of it out.”
Loona just shrugged, already halfway through the doorway to her room.
Blitzø looked up at Stolas, who was hovering awkwardly in the space between the kitchen and living room. “Wanna see if we can figure out how this thing unfolds?”
It wasn’t too difficult. There was a handle under the seat cushions that, when pulled, somehow expanded out into an entire bed, as promised.
“I guess we can just leave it out like this all the time, for now,” Blitzø said, rubbing his chin. “Business is picking up. Soon I can probably find us a two bedroom, so you can have your own space. But this’ll do for now, right?”
It struck Stolas as odd, that Blitzø wasn’t prioritizing his own space. Perhaps he just meant because they were both in the living room.
“This is more than enough,” Stolas said, realizing he’d almost been silent for too long. This time, he moved forward and took Blitzø’s hand in his own. “Really, Blitz. Thank you.”
“Oh. Uh.” Stolas couldn’t possibly be imagining, both of Blitzø’s cheeks were turning mismatched shades of pink. The imp swallowed. “Really, Stolas. It’s no problem. It’ll make me feel better if I know you’re getting a good night’s sleep.”
“That’s so sweet.” Stolas paused. “Darling,” he added, just because he needed to see what would happen. If he was allowed.
Blitzø’s eyes widened. “I- oh. I- uh. Yeah.” He backed away, pulling his hands in towards himself protectively. “I have to make dinner.” Now he paused, and contemplated Stolas cautiously. “You wanna help?”
Stolas’s feathers fluffed in astonishment. “Yes!” he said, then tried to tone down the enthusiasm, in case Blitzø found it off putting, like he had so many times before. “Ahem, I mean, I’m afraid I’ll be starting from an almost completely beginner standpoint, but yes, I would love to assist in any way I can.”
Blitzø threw him an odd look. “Well alright, you didn’t have to use so many words about it. But-” he added, before Stolas could go and get his feelings hurt. “I kinda like that you did. Now get in here and we’ll get choppin’.”
-----------
Well as it turned out, Stolas wasn’t entirely useless without his powers. He proved to be absolutely average at kitchen-related activities, which seemed to match Blitzø quite well, as he gave Stolas gentle and thorough instructions full of dozens of tips and tricks he’d picked up over the years.
Still, the imp absolutely bragged to his daughter about how Stolas had helped make the food.
Even stranger, her reaction had been a borderline-impressed, “Oh shit, not bad,” before retreating to her room.
Stolas beamed at both of them, not because he believed it was anything special but because it genuinely wasn’t bad, and that was good enough right now. He was feeling so proud of his amateur cooking skills that when Blitzø offered for him to come into IMP tomorrow - Stolas had been showing great interest in how his work went, the first real interest he’d felt in days - he almost said yes. Hesitated and thought about it deeply, chewing his lower beak and nearly going cross eyed.
In the end though, he sighed and looked away and asked for a few more days
Blitzø took one of his hands within his own and held it in his lap until Stolas looked at him.
“Hey,” Blitzø said gently, “A few days is way sooner than never. I want to make sure you’re really feeling up to it before I drag you into I.M.P.’s mess too. I’m glad you’re starting to feel better, even if it’s not all the way yet. Take the time you need, okay?”
“Okay,” Stolas whispered, his eyes once again darting away from Blitzø’s.
Blitzø drew back and started gathering up their empty dinner plates. “You should go change, birdy. Almost time to try out that cozy new bed of yours.”
“Oh! You don’t want to teach me how to do the dishes too?” Stolas asked, mind short circuiting at the thought of sharing a bed with Blitzø again. But like, in a good way. “I helped make, I should help clean.”
Blitzø considered that. “How about you wipe down the table? Just take a damp rag to it, clean rags are in that drawer over there.” He motioned to the drawer.
While Stolas peered in the drawer, Blitzø got started on the dishes. The actual rule of the house was whoever used a dish cleaned it, but Blitzø usually ended up doing Loona’s anyways due to her dislike of being outside her room. He didn’t mind washing Stolas’s too.
A long arm snaked around him and Blitzø would have jumped- except he’d been keeping track of exactly where Stolas was, and it felt almost natural as Stolas held his rag under the faucet for a few seconds to dampen it, his stomach feathers brushing the back of Blitzø’s head. No, instead Blitzø found himself frozen, not wanting to disrupt the moment.
Stolas didn’t seem to notice, stepping away a moment later and turning to wipe the table in long graceful strokes, humming the prettiest little tune Blitzø had ever heard. He spent way longer wiping the table clean than Blitzø would have, but that was probably a good thing. Most of the time Blitzø didn’t even bother wiping the table down until it started grossing him out.
“What shall I do with the dirty rag?” Stolas asked, his voice barely audible above the rush of running water and the sudsing of soap on dishes as Blitzø scrubbed them.
“Just leave it, I’ll rinse it and hang it to dry when I’m done,” Blitzø said, glancing over his shoulder. So he caught the look of confusion and then understanding that dawned as Stolas understood that the laundry situation was a whole lot different here than it had been at the palace.
“Alright.” Stolas’s hand landed feather-light atop Blitzø’s shoulder. “I’ll go get ready for bed, then. See you in a bit, darling.”
Definitely unrelated to Stolas touching him and calling him sweet things, Blitzø’s hand jerked, and he accidentally sprayed himself with water. Stolas’s hooting little giggles drifted over his spluttered curses as the owl backed away to get ready for bed.
When he’d finished cleaning everything up and gotten himself into his own pjs, Blitzø tiptoed into the living room, hoping that the new mattress was so comfy Stolas would already be in snoozeland, but no such luck. Instead, it appeared Stolas had deliberately waited up for him. He was sitting up, the edges of his feet still too long and dangling off the edge, and he smiled when Blitzø rounded the couch and entered his line of sight.
The smile dropped just as quickly as Blitzø headed over to his beanbag chair and curled up in it.
“What are you doing?” Stolas asked.
Blitzø looked at him quizzically. “Going to sleep? Why, do you need something?”
“No! No, I- Well, I…” Stolas seemed to be struggling to find words, frown lines creasing his face unpleasantly. Blitzø’s heart dropped. Fuck, and today had been going so well for him.
“Is it the new bed?” Blitzø asked. “I’m sorry Stolas, human mattresses are just shorter than you, I wish I could afford a goetia-sized one, but-”
“It’s not that!” Stolas interrupted, louder than he meant to. He just couldn’t tolerate Blitzø being so apologetic, so- ugh. Best to be straightforward about things, even if that hadn’t ended up so well in the past.
“I just thought that you would be sharing this new bed with me,” Stolas admitted, twisting his fingers tightly in the horseshoe blanket. “I mean, it is big enough. I don’t wish for you to not have a real bed because of me anymore.”
“That’s really nice, Stolas,” Blitzø said, his voice oddly hoarse, “but I can’t.”
Stolas raised an eyebrow, voice coming out sharper and bitchier than it had in weeks, maybe months. “And why the fuck not?”
Blitzø shot a nervous glance at Loona’s door before turning a glare on Stolas. “Because I won’t be able to keep my fucking hands off you,” he hissed.
“No one said you had to,” Stolas shot back, lowering his voice to match Blitzø’s out of respect for his daughter. “Besides, you very much haven’t. Why start now?”
The imp’s face went blank. “What do you mean?”
Stolas made an impatient noise. “Oh come now, we’ve held hands more in the last few days then we did for the entire duration of our arrangement. Earlier today you kissed me on the cheek, and,” Stolas could feel himself blushing, thinking about the vague ghostlike memory of his first night here, “I’m quite certain that wasn’t the first time.”
A look of regret and longing passed over Blitzø’s face.
Stolas took it upon himself to draw back the covers invitingly. “Please come to bed with me, darling. We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to, we can just cuddle.”
Blitzø huffed, like this wasn’t something he’d been dreaming about for weeks and struggled out of the beanbag. “Absolutely not,” he said, climbing into the bed, settling beside Stolas and pulling the blanket up to his chin. “If we’re doing this, then we’re gonna talk.”
“Very well.” Stolas reached under the blanket and tangled their fingers together. “Would you like to start or shall I?”
“I will.” Blitzø’s voice was definitely not shaking, not even a little bit. “I’m glad you’re here and I don’t want you to leave. That’s all. Anything else you want, it’s yours. We go at your pace. Just-” Blitzø’s hand squeezed Stolas’s. The imp wasn’t looking at him, instead staring straight ahead, like he couldn’t bear to be seen while saying something so vulnerable. “-Keep me in the loop about what you’re thinking, okay? I promise I’ll believe you this time.”
“I promise I shall try to be understanding and reassuring if you don’t,” Stolas replied, his throat tight.
He understood better now, had had that month to reflect on Blitzø’s initial reaction that dreadful full moon, and now these precious days in Blitzø’s apartment, learning more about just how much they both hated themselves.
But not each other. They’d both clearly been wrong about that.
“I am happy to stay with you,” Stolas continued softly, “for as long as you’ll have me. I’ve known for a while now that you’re it for me, Blitz. As long as you know that, I believe everything will work itself out.”
Funny, how optimistic he felt about it. There was something about being called after desperately during a near-death experience, followed by being wholeheartedly welcomed into someone’s home that just… helped quiet all those pesky voices that were always telling Stolas no one could ever love him.
He’d been ready to die for Blitzø, and Blitzø had been ready to die for him.
“You’re it for me too, Stolas,” Blitzø said. He’d clearly been following a similar line of thought, because his next words were, “if you ever try to die for me again, we’re going to have a fucking problem, got it?”
“I understand,” Stolas answered, because that was something he couldn’t promise.
But neither of them had died. Blitzø had taken care of him instead, and now maybe Stolas could do the same. At least until the next big problem - and there was sure to be a next big problem, whether that be how to get Octavia back, Andrealphus or Satan seeking them out again, or something else entirely - reared its ugly head.
“Good,” Blitzø said, aggressively snuggling up to Stolas’s side. “Good talk. Now go to sleep.”
“Yes dear,” Stolas said lightly. He bent his neck and pecked a tender kiss to the top of Blitzø’s head. “Sweet dreams.”
When he turned on to his side and curled around Blitzø, drawing his knees up to his stomach, all of him fit perfectly on the mattress. He could feel himself melting quickly into sleep, all that tiredness catching up with him.
Blitzø buried his face in Stolas’s long-missed chest fluff and threw an arm over him, and a leg for good measure, keeping him close.
The bed could hold them both, and nothing was going to keep them apart now.
I uh, I wrote. New kinky Stolitz fic if anyone cares. A Tale of Two First times in which Blitzø and Stolas well, have two first times. The one in The Circus, and one post Sinsmas after they are in a relationship(?)
Y'all I'm trying to come up with a situation in which Blitzø would feasibly agree to get gangbanged (how many do u need for a gangbang? Is 3 tops enough?) by Fizz, Ozzie, and Stolas and this is wayyyy harder than it seems lemme tell u
"Do we canonically know what Ozzie's tongue looks like?" And other sentences you might hear me say out loud to myself when stoned off my ass and writing fanfiction
