yeah i think that’s it. (i am not a good metric for normal but i for one am hella bad at those kinds of things) i think it’s not even the things that are the problem, we just look for something to focus our self-flagellation to understand it
yeah its like when you're cleaning a counter or something, and you clean it and you're like, ah ok this looks good i am Okay with the cleanliness of this counter, and then you turn back around again and notice something you hadn't seen before, so you clean that, and then you see something else again a moment later. you aren't ever going to get it good enough for it to not bug you, or something, it's never good enough, and the size of the mess -- or the issue or the Personal Flaw or whatever -- doesn't matter as long as its a like, foothold. i could be somehow absolutely flawless w/r/t all my personal habits, time keeping, eating, sleeping, work, school -- and i'd like, you know, actively seek out something to beat myself up over. i hate me, okay, why do i hate me? how do i make it clear to myself that i hate me? uhhhhhh --- here!! this thing!!!
email is Hell, Hell Forever. i go like six months checking it regularly and six months avoiding it entirely, just one after the other. i fear it but it does not fear me. good luck friend