Hello. I have recently completed the knb manga and I read a fiction piece you wrote. About both the akashi's. I think its very poetic and beautiful. But the eye gouging scene in the manga.. Do you not think it makes him a fucking psycho? Makes me wonder about his self harm tendencies and destructive behaviour. Your thoughts?
omg lol this is such an old topic, beaut. i hope u liked knb, weLCOME TO THE BASKETBALL JUNGLE
ehh we’ve all wondered at some point what he meant by the eye-gouging, and with akashi’s characterization being all over the place i guess u can interpret it however you want lol. we will never know if he would have gouged his eyes out for real after all hHAHA
personally i think akashi at that time perfectly knew how to motivate his team to do better and used it to his advantage. i dont think he was planning to actually do that, but thats the point: he was so unable to imagine himself losing that he might as well have made such a wild promise.
whats more interesting to me was the fact that his team went with it so steadfastly LOL makes me wonder what impression akashi gives off at rakuzan. i mean, i think that at that moment its the difference between akashi and team’s thoughts that is relevant: akashi says that and means “its not like i would ever lose” and rakuzan thinks “for akashi winning is EVERYTHING so what if he WERE to lose”
about destructive tendencies, well its not too rare to find fics where akashi punishes himself to some small degree for losing control over smth, or even commits suicide for similar reasons. i think its a valid headcanon you can have, although imagining bokushi destructive on a regular basis is impossible to me. i’ve always imagined bokushi(?) as sb who either keeps it together through all or just snaps.
this said tho, again, i think the eye-gouging scene specifically was not about self harm at all. i hope i explained it clearly enough lol orz