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it's January 22 in Japan!

I'm feeling 22~~🎶

@taylorswift

#taylorswift #22 #red #i'mfeeling22 #swiftie

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It’s my Birthday!

#I'mfeeling22

Revelations 4: I'm feeling 22

Age.

While I've always been one to think it's just a silly number, there really are patterns and phases we fall into once that lucky number hits us square between the eyes. Ya know, terrible 2s, rebellious teen years, mid-life crisis.... and then there's your 20s. A time for sheer unadulterated dysfunctional mess. Here I am, 21 (22 in December)... graduated from college.. had my whole life mapped out. I'd work my arse off, get to graduation, have a job right out of the womb, I'd move out, maybe buy a house, pay off my debt in 20 years.... and then I looked around at this life that was predestined for me. Because it is. We don't even realize that is. But since we were itty bitty we were asked what we wanted to be when we grew up. And all of those questions conditioned us to choosing the one thing that made the most money. And then we get to college and have to decide our life's path right then and there amidst the piles and piles of applications. I mapped out a life I thought I wanted. But I realized shortly into my plan that I wasn't happy. I didn't want the rest of my life to be me just trying to make it through one more day. Just one more day until I reached the finish line and then on to the next race with blinders on and my eye on the prize.

I feel like being in my 20s I should be able to fully try and learn all I can. But there is so much pressure to go be someone. To go be something. To go make the money that won't really be mine for the next 40 or so years so I can pay off this massive debt in my name.

So what now? I supposedly have all the time in the world, but it certainly doesn't feel like that. The whole not having my life together is getting pretty old. So... I guess that's what 22 feels like. Kind of the distant cousin to 3 years old, I'd say. Chaotic, messy, with scrapes and bruises, and there's never a dull moment.