how the avengers would cope (headcanon)
warnings: anger, bad coping methods, sadness, IW SPOILERS
steve was shocked, and he was fucking devastated. his whole world had just disintegrated in front of him and he was so, so upset. he’d fought in wars, he’d seen his friends dying around him. but this was different. this was bucky. his bucky, who was always there for him no matter what, and who had been through so much that he deserved a happy ending.
and then steve got angry. this wasn’t what bucky deserved. once steve found out he was alive, he would go to tony and push past their disagreements because bucky meant more than winning a petty quarrel. “we don’t trade lives”, he used to tell himself. but this steve would do anything for bucky, and this steve wants more. this steve wants his best friend back. this steve needs his best friend back. this steve will stop at nothing until he has his best friend back.
tony felt empty. peter parker, the boy who made him believe he, someone he considered a monster, could actually be a father, died in his arms. and it hurt. he returned to find pepper gone too and he broke down. he cussed, punched walls, threw tables; then he just laid down and cried for days. he ignored friday when she told him that there were phone calls from bruce and steve and he would just lay there. he had lost everything.
but then he would get back to work, as if nothing ever happened. he’d hold back his tears and ignore the nightmares and drown himself in coffee. he throws himself into his work and in trying to figure out how to bring everyone back that he forgets that he himself is alive, and human. and it hurts because he blames himself, he always does.
natasha’s first instinct is to protect herself and her loved ones, and after she checks on steve and the rest in wakanda, she definitely rushes over to clint and his family to check if they’re okay. though she’s saddened, she’s thankful that her closest allies and friends didn’t disappear because they would be the glimmer of hope she and the world needed. if anyone could do it, it would be them.
she would definitely be the most stable of the avengers. she was trained since young to push past her troubles and ignore her feelings to complete the mission at hand - to defeat thanos. though she tries to help the others through the pain, she’s a realist. she doesn’t actually believe 100% that they can bring everyone back, and she tries to help them get over the deceased instead of appeasing them with things she herself doesn’t believe. she tries to help out in whatever way she can to support her team because they were more than just her team. they were her friends, her family.
thor would push himself to solve the problem. he’d try to act as if everything is okay and not acknowledge the fact he just lost his brother and half of the universe, but it’s okay. he tries to smile, to crack a few jokes and get back to business. and he does - he tries his best to help the others find their loved ones, but inside he aches. he knows that even if everyone who was disintegrated comes back, loki wouldn’t.
but one day he’ll snap. he’d be drinking a cup of coffee in the morning and getting started on training when he’d just fling the cup of coffee across the room and punch a wall, yelling curse words in asgardian and praying to heimdall before remembering he was dead too. at first, he wouldn’t cry. he’s bottled his emotions up far too long and he just didn’t know how to anymore. but nat would find him and whisper russian nothings into his ears to calm him down and sit by him as he cried silently with his head in his hands for hours.
bruce wouldn’t speak of his feelings. he’d be quiet. he’d wake up in the morning and he’d drink coffee and he’d be in the lab all day tinkering and (reluctantly) back to bed at night. he rarely spoke anymore, and all he wanted was to fix everything and get everything back to normal, whatever that was.
but he’d have nightmares that wouldn’t go away. he’d wake up in the middle of the night with his heart pumping, afraid of the dreams and afraid of himself. he tries his best to forget them, but it’s hard. sometimes he would take a shower and stare at himself in the mirror for hours after, studying his own face and trying to understand himself.
rocket would fly off. he’d be in a rush to find the rest of the guardians, whoever was left anyways. he’d trace their ship to titan, and find tony stark sitting there with his head in his hands alone. he’d try to stay calm, to ask tony if he knew of his friends and where they were, and tony would just whisper that they were gone.
and rocket would fly off again, to whatever planet was the furthest away from anywhere the guardians ever went together. everything reminded him of them, the music, the women, the fighters, the insects, the nature. he’d drink and drink to try and forget that he had lost his only friends, and he doesn’t think he would ever recover.
okoye would be strong. yes, her kingdom had lost half of their greatest men, and her king, the man she vowed to protect just disintegrated in front of her eyes, but she was a warrior, and she didn’t give up that easy. she focused her efforts on helping the country recover, and pushed shuri to create astounding technological advances. she would not give up until t’challa was back, because he was the rightful king to her nation.
she would be colder than ever, but she would promise to help the avengers in any way possible. she would ensure the support of the remaining the dora milaje members in the fight against thanos. she would do her best to follow her code and be strong, but she would also let natasha take her out for starbucks whenever things got too tough.