#imminent murder

[tomicscomics]

11/01/2024

Happy All Saints' Day!

JOKE-OGRAPHY: 1. In this Bible story (Mark 12:28-34), Jesus is teaching a crowd and answering the riddles and objections of scribes who want to trip Him up. In the end, one scribe pipes up and asks a genuine question: "Which is the greatest commandment?" Jesus gives a twofold answer, which boils down to, "Love the one true God above everything, and love your neighbor as yourself." Though simple, this sums up all the laws and prophets. The scribe is impressed by Jesus's answer and agrees that these two commandments are worth more than any sacrifice prescribed by the law. Jesus sees this scribe's understanding and commends him by telling him he's not far from the Kingdom of God. After that, no one else dares to ask any more questions. 2. In this cartoon, the Bible story progresses as normal until the ending. When Jesus tells the scribe he's not far from the Kingdom of God, the scribe instead assumes Jesus means he's not far from heaven, which you only go to when you die. Thus, the scribe thinks Jesus is threatening to kill him, and the crowd decides not to ask any more questions, lest they too be caught up in the Lord's mighty wrath. Of course, they are all mistaken, which is funny.

[realrogerhours]

In the early hours of the morning

[madmanwonder]

Prompt Yandere AU- Wendy is usually a chilled out girl. To the point if someone teases her crush on Dipper she will tease back. However if you try to take him she has a friend she would like you to meet. It is an axe to send a specific message. Back. Off. Of her man.

Wendy like to think she was chill and mellow kind of woman. Go with the flow and never let stuff get to her and have a laidback attitude in life…

“What big muscles you got there~.”

…until some soon-to-be-dead slut started to flirt and touch her Dipper, her future lover and husband and father of their dozens kids. Her face turned ice-cold and her green eyes once sparkle like gems were dead and lifeless as a corpse as she slowly stood up to her full tall height and grabbed hold of her woodsman axe with an murderous aura of rage and determination to murder the slut for daring touching her man.

“Killkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkill”

[hippietrashcan]

When you're reading and somebody interrupts you.

[softpoindexterarchive-blog]

My mum just came into my room and turned the light on then looked around left and didn't turn my fucking light off againNOW I HAVE TO GET UP URHGHGHGHGFBS,AFLGJ