Discover Top Posts Tagged with #important realizations

Greg loves Rock so much, he fell in love with one

#important realizations #monday punday #steven universe #greg universe #gregandrose #gregrose #steven universe greg #rose quartz #crystalgems #Rocks R Us

I think one of the hardest parts about still living at home is that I had to dedicate so much of my childhood to learning how my family members’ minds work just so that I could pretend to have a normal child, and the longer I’m here the more I am forced to realize that they never tried to learn about me.

#personal #important realizations

Or that my brain is glitching from sleep deprivation

I realized that at some point, I think in January, I started thinking I was 38 years old. My birthday is not in January, it’s actually about six months away, so I’m still 37 and I don’t know if that means that I’m excited about getting older or trying to get away from my past or that I’m bad at math.

#important realizations

This weekend, i went on another NJCF retreat in new york. this one was different than the other one i went on, because instead of it being only our chapter, it was with people from all over ny/nj. I was really nervous to go, but my friend and i were in the same track and the same small group, so it was okay. We got to the retreat very late, so after we had small group, we went to register and then basically went to bed. the next morning, we went to morning prayer and then to breakfast. morning prayer was great, we were able to pray for the day, and it got me really excited for the entire day. I even enjoyed breakfast! We had eggs and biscuits and they were actually really good. We then went into small group. Keren, the njcf president/my friend/my ex-ca was also in our track, but she was in a different small group. I was really nervous to start the day, but as we started reading and talking in group, i got really involved, and I ended up having a lot of fun that morning. I started getting really involved in the discussion, and learned so much. We then went to lunch, and lunch that day was a lot of fun. For snack, we had really good cookies :). After lunch, it was break time. We had a 2 and a half hour break, and for that entire time, my friends Julie and Sarah and I stood on a line for a huge swing. We were really nervous, but as we got closer, we realized we couldn’t bail. It was finally our turn, and we were super nervous. We put on the gear and went onto the swing. I was shaking so much because i was so scared. And then we started to go up and up and up. We were very high, and i was very nervous. My friend Julie cut the rope, and i literally felt like we were falling to our death. and then we opened our eyes, and it felt so cool. it was totally worth the two hours of freezing. After that we went back to small group and read some more of the bible and talked more about it. I was super engaged and was having so much fun. After that section, Sarah and I saw Keren and Keren told me how excited she was that i was so engaged and gave me a hug. hearing that made me more excited to participate. Dinner was gross, but the NJCF staffer was there, and it was nice because we were able to talk to her about our life group at school and why we were having trouble getting people to come. We had a HUGE brownie and it was AMAZING. After dinner, we went back to our track. Even though it was late and we were all tired, we still had a lot of fun, and what Keren had said to me earlier made me more excited to participate. After that, we had worship. It was fun, but being in a room with 500+ people was a little overwhelming and i got overheated and had to sit down for most of it. But during worship i figured a lot of things out, so it was good i was working on something else. We then had chapter time, and it was fun to see everyone because we were all separated into different tracks, and i didn’t get to see everyone at meal time. And then it was our last day. We basically just had a question and answer time in small group, but it was interesting. A the end of the day, we stood on the beach and prayed and took a lot of cute pictures. This weekend was literally perfect in so many ways. I become close with so many people, I learned so much, and i just had such a great weekend away from school. I learned that it’s ok to struggle, it’s ok to have a hard time, because at the end of the day, it makes you stronger. I learned the importance of sharing your story, that your story is important, and it could help people in many different ways. And i learned how to truly work on getting better and being happier. What made me feel even better about everything was the text that Keren sent me last night when i told her we got home saftly. she told me that she was so proud of how engaged and involved i was all weekend, and that i should be really excited for how I'm going to grow, and that i should be encouraged. And I am. i am ready to be happy again, I am ready to get rid of my demons for good, and I am ready to start getting back to who I was. And this weekend was what i needed to remember that, and to start getting back on track. After the retreat in February, i thought i was ready, but now I know I am

#big event #important realizations #college

ohhhhh my god I've been thinking Amber Rose and Ruby Rose were the same person, how long has THAT been mixing me up. Also who is Amber Rose

#I'll Google her in the morning it's fine #important realizations

Important things I should remember:

Art should not be made with other people’s opinions in mind.

Because once you start worrying about what others will think, you’re not making art for you.

Art is a means of expression. Are you expressing what you feel/want or what others will like?

If you create something with other people in mind, it’s no longer art and you’re no longer expressing yourself.

Your emotions are beautiful and you are beautiful so the art you make will be beautiful.

And hey, everything else is just a tool to help you express yourself better. So once you collect the tools you need, you’re ready to express yourself to others in ways they’ll understand.

#text #me #important realizations #fuck I should seriously study

You can only live one life.

Perhaps one of the most confusing things the 21st century has done is make 'choice' irrelevant. No, I'm not saying we don't have them. I'm saying that we have too many and therefore dabble in many activities without ever truly committing to one. Because of that, when the time comes to choose something we are paralyzed with indecision and self-doubt.

I parallel this with the ridiculous, viral idea that one can 'settle' on a person and therefore live a more empty, boring life, than if they had waited for The One. I hate this because it gives the impression that there is a way not to settle, a way to continue moving while stationary. This is impossible. We all settle. We have to. That's the only way to do accomplish anything. The question is not whether you are settling, it's whether who or what you are settling on is right.

Americans, particularly those from the United States, like to believe that the world is our oyster. We believe that if we try hard enough, we can be anything, anywhere, anytime. We encourage our friends to shoot for the moon, reminding them that even if they fail they will fall among the stars. We dream of a world where anything is possible, but we do not live in that world. We live in a world just as quantifiable as that which is within it, but because of our good-willed delusions, we are falling short of inhabiting it. We are trying to have it all without sacrificing anything, and because of that we are frustrated and bored.

I spent most of today thinking about my future. I had a short amount of time to make an important decision. I'm not sure I've ever felt so confused and on the verge of tears for so many hours in my life. It was totally different from breakup pain, totally different from death pain...the closest thing I can say it felt like was wiping out on the beach after failing to body surf a wave you were certain you could handle. You're confused and disoriented from the crash but more than that, you're baffled as to how you messed up so badly. That's how I felt today. How could I have been so wrong? How could I have thought this was what I wanted? Was I crazy? Should I just go for it? Was I just second-guessing myself because I was lazy and didn't want to do the extra work?

But as hours passed it became clear to me: I cannot study abroad in Japan. It isn't for me.

And when I realized that, I felt a huge weight lift. I wasn't chasing my dream, I wasn't doing something daring and cool. I was taking the safer route, I was staying home, but more importantly than anything else, I was choosing.

I love Japan. I would love to visit it someday. I would love to spend time leisurely exploring Kyoto, learning about Shintoism, visiting various temples and zen gardens, walking through the foothills and getting lost in the mist. In fact, I would love to visit Kyoto this fall.

Some dreams aren't meant to be realized, though. Some are meant to be chased, observed, and abandoned. Some are meant to die. And some are meant to be remembered as learning experiences, because they weren't what they seemed to be.

And that's ok.

Because that's what choosing is.

You can only live one life. You can only meet so many people, do so many things, and visit so many places during that time. In order to make the most of your allotted period on earth, you must strategize your stay to be efficient and meaningful. You can accomplish this by the power of choice. In a sense, it is the only power a human can have. The power of choice; the ability to make life-altering and often irreversible decisions. That is what it is to live.

#writing #thoughts #important realizations #human nature