#incorrect eda clawthorne

[transsexualesbomaniac]

Eda: Okay, fuck marry kill. Lilith, go!

Lilith: Fuck no one, marry Darius for economic security and kill you for trying to make me play this bullshit game again.

[hex-wittebane]

Eda: Raine and I are having a baby! Hunter, confused: That's gre-! Eda, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's you, sign here.

[hex-wittebane]

Luz: Sorry it took so long to bail you out of jail. Eda: No, it's my fault. I shouldn't have used my one phone call to prank call the Scouts.

[transsexualesbomaniac]

Luz: Eda needs a lift to the wedding. She was at that yoga retreat we sent her on and fell out of a warrior pose and broke her hip. 

Amity: ...You don't think someone might've pushed her, do you?

Luz: Amity, please. 

Luz: They were a bunch of rich hippies who spent two weeks in a forest with Eda Clawthorne. 

Amity: 

Luz: Of course someone pushed her.

[hex-wittebane]

Eda: The hell is a book? Luz: It's a movie without video and audio. King: So just subtitles????? Luz: Exactly.

[transsexualesbomaniac]

Luz: oh man, this one makes me cry every time. Oh nooo, shit, not chapter three, chapter three is soul-crushing. And have you read chapter six? The evolution? The twists? The heart-wrenching questions you're left to grapple with?

Camila: Honey, this is a math book.

Luz: And so innocently designed as well to lure its readers in with false hopes!

Raine, watching from the sidelines: ...Those drama classes may have been a mistake.

Eda: *sips her coffee* Looks like they're working just fine if you ask me.

[hex-wittebane]

Eda: Am I going too far? Lilith: No, no, no. You went too far about seven hours ago. Now you're going to prison.

[transsexualesbomaniac]

Eda: Some people tell me that I have a unique way of lighting up the room.

Lilith: It’s called arson, Eda, and those ‘people’ are witnesses.