Induratize | 05
Pairing: Prince!Jimin x Princess!Reader
Genre: Royalty AU.
Warnings: Angst, Smut (future), Fluff, Some violence. [angst in this chapter].
Words: 4k+
Summary: You make a heart-shattering discovery.
A/N: i won’t even try and justify the wait bc i’ve been crying about it on my blog regularly, so!!! this is a major chapter in terms of OC and Jimin’s relationship. It took me a while to write it because I kept getting distracted by other projects but now that i only have exams to cover (and the big reveal has happened phew) I can maybe focus on moving the story to its fluffy end???? hmmm????? [it’s coming soon]. PLEASE tell me what you think!!! I have already written 2k words of the next chapter.
When Jimin used to walk down the same dimly lit passageway towards his father’s, the King’s, chambers he rarely felt anything other than mild annoyance from being reprimanded for the most minuscule mishap while on missions and negotiations with the neighbouring clans. Back then, he had nothing to lose. Nor did he care much if he was whipped or starved whenever he made a mistake. It was how he had been trained ever since he was a boy. His father became even more unsympathetic once the Queen passed. Jimin was allowed a mere few hours to grieve her before he was stowed away in the training camp under the Army General. Every tear that slipped down his cheek was whipped away until his eyes were dry and mouth was set tight. There was no place for weakening emotions like sadness. Only anger. And anger was filled inside of Jimin to the brim in his years of training. To the point where he learned how to master it and utilise the emotion in winning wars and slashing clans that refused to do his father’s bidding.
He had learned how to be unyielding and unforgiving. He was attached to no one but the cause of…. Of what? He had never questioned it before. Conquering was all his father cared about. But was it not enough? Haelyra was prospering. There was nothing the kingdom lacked. Yet his father was unwilling to stop his mission to have the whole world in the palm of his hand. And Jimin was a loyal soldier, fulfilling his duty to his country and being an advocate of his father’s plans. Whether willing or unwilling. Though he was mostly ambivalent to the details or the plans. He didn’t know a life other than the one he was living. The tender love and nurture his mother provided for the short period that she was alive felt like a fever dream.
Until you. Until he met you. And now that he was walking through the same walls, surrounded by the same guards, about to see the same person he had seen many times in this context; he was scared. He was scared out of his wits because now he had something to lose. You. The one person who let him shed tears without judgement and held him together. Someone he did not know he needed until he let you in and wrap your warm arms around his cold body. You were the warmest person he had ever known and the only person who let him…. feel anything other than anger and numbness. Only other person apart from his mother. Though his body was not showing physical signs of his internal panic about what would his father could possibly do to you if he realised your importance to Jimin.
Leaving you in his chambers was harder than he thought it would be. Your soft eyes had looked up at him while you clutched the sheets around your even softer body. Thankfully, he’d been able to contain his initial panic and gently coax you in to taking another restful nap until he was finished with business. Reassuring you that he would be back and that it was just a routine visit. But of course Jimin knew better than to pretend he knew what was coming his way. That was his father’s play. Never keeping Jimin in the know too much so he will stay on alert and not become comfortable in his position as the future king. He understood it before. Or at least he thought he did. That his father was preparing him for what is to come. Though, more and more it seemed impractical to Jimin that he wasn’t not aware of future plans, or even current, right before they were to be implemented. Would it not be better if Jimin was made aware of future expeditions and laws that were to be announced before they actually were? Did his father not trust him with any decision making?
“Your majesty.” Minister of the Household, Ahn Jihoon, greeted Jimin as he entered his father’s chambers. His nerves were on edge but at least his years of training made him a master of control.
Jimin took a curt bow towards where his father sat in his throne, busy examining the scroll in his hands.
“How are you, son?” This was certainly unexpected. Jimin could count on one hand how many times his father had asked him that.
“I am well, father. What is it that you wish to discuss?” He gets straight to the point like always. However, he could tell that his father was trying to find the right words to speak with the way his eyes roamed about the room before setting on him.
“I see it was quite the blood bath.” The King chuckles as if the death of hundreds of people was daily humour to him and it makes Jimin feel queasy. “You’re looking bright which is excellent before you begin your next task.”
“When would that be?” It was too soon for his men to go out again. They had barely healed from the last mission. Hell, he had barely healed but he didn’t want his father to know that.
“Well son,” The King leaned back in his throne, placing the scroll he had been reading to the side for the house minister to collect, “You will embark at sundown tomorrow.”
When his father continued to stare at him with shrewd arrogance, Jimin knew the answer to his question before it even slipped past his tongue.
“Where… would that be?” A calculated smile and then an astute laugh.
“To Tampa of course. We have business there you failed to finish. Again.” The atmosphere had gone eerie in mere seconds as the King grimaced towards Jimin, unsatisfied.
“But my lord, we just attacked. I’ve barely had time to wash off the blood soaked in my coats.” Though Jimin’s reasoning fell on deaf ears as the King waived off his concerns.
“It will be better to attack while the enemy is still wounded. The element of surprise will be in our favour son.” Jimin was furious.
“And how do you expect me to use that element in my favour when half of my men are bed bound?”
“We will recruit more men if need be.” The king looked unbothered. Staring dismissively at Jimin who tried to keep his voice levelled and not explode with the anger bubbling inside. How could his father be so reckless and uncaring towards his own people?
“I will not have untrained soldiers sign a death contract. You underestimate the Tampans, father. They fight with a vigour that even I do not possess.”
“Then acquire it!” The king’s loud voice boomed across the walls, alerting the guards standing in his chambers to the king’s fury. “For your land. For your people! Remember son. No mercy…” He leaned close to Jimin, looking him in the eyes before whispering, “Only vengeance.”
Jimin swallowed his own vehemence. Your face flashing before his eyes suddenly, calming his nerves tenfold that even he himself was surprised.
“We will make an enemy out of them forever if we attack again, you are aware, right father?”
“We don’t need cooperation from those heathens; only obedience.” The king spoke of his former allies as if he had barely known them. When in reality, the Tampan tribe had been a valuable resource and a source of information to his father’s previous plans. And yet, with the craze of world dominance, the King was ready to sacrifice valuable bonds in exchange of absolute power. Wanting nothing but to play God.
Jimin says nothing. Face stoic and posture stony. “Do you understand me soldier?”
He just nods. “Good. You must maintain an air of absolute obedience with anyone. No exceptions. You are the future King, son. You must be cruel if it results in obedience.”
If Jimin remained in his father’s chambers any longer, he was afraid he would say something that could jeopardize his men or worse, you.
“And Jimin?” He stops right before he exits when his father calls him again.
“Yes, my lord?”
“The girl must remain pure. Do not forget. If the marriage is consummated, it will be difficult cutting ties with Munia when the time comes.”
Within seconds, Jimin has exited his father’s chambers after nodding before he stops in the hallway, away from anyone witnessing the heavy breaths leaving him. He had almost forgotten. In fact, he actually had forgotten about the sick and twisted plan his father had in mind before he agreed to marry Jimin with you. The relationship that had cultivated between him and you turned out to be something so bewildering, so precious that the reminder of the wicker scheme his father had come up with was making him physically sick to his stomach.
How could Jimin ever agree to it? How did he ever agree to such thing being done to an innocent human being, let alone someone he had come to care for so much that he knew, without question, that he would die for you. The overwhelming feeling he had developed to protect and cherish you was like cold water being poured all over him. The realisation that he loved you had him weak in the knees as he leaned back against the stone wall for support. Looking up at the sky as if it held all the answers.
He was in love with you. And in the end, he would have to leave you.
His father had specifically instructed him to not consummate his marriage with you because then, after acquiring all of your wealth and Kingdom, the royal law would allow Jimin to divorce a princess if she is pure and can be married to another royal. It was the sick reality. That you would be just handed off to the next Kingdom as an offering to another prince. As long as you were pure, his father’s plans would be in place and no royal laws will be broken. If Jimin did take your maidenhood, you would be his wife forever, his responsibility and the King would have no choice but to remain allies with Munia.
But he knew that if he did mark you as his forever, the King would not stop at anything until you were out of his life. There was no other way to conquer Munia other than war or via infiltration. Having Jimin be in holy matrimony with you was the perfect way to gain access to anything and everything in Munia.
And yet, he couldn’t find it in himself to try to do any of those things. He didn’t care for it anymore. Ever since you’d come in to his life, it seemed worth living again. He couldn’t pinpoint exactly when it happened but he would do anything to protect you. Even if it meant keeping you away from him. He couldn’t risk your life for his own selfish need to have you. You deserved better than a man like him. A man who was using you for your wealth and Kingdom. It didn’t matter how much he loved you; his father would never let you stay in his life
It had been roughly an hour that Jimin has been gone and with each passing minute, you’re getting more nervous. In the time you’ve been here, it wasn’t hard to notice Jimin’s swaying moods always came after being away on his father’s orders or whenever he came back from his chambers. And the way Jimin’s demeanour distorted, hearing the guard relay the message, you knew that all the progress you two had made so far in connecting with each other was at risk. It was becoming more apparent to you that opening himself up to someone was definitely not an option for Jimin before you or at least a while before you that his default reaction to you being concerned for his wellbeing was that it was a burden for you. When in reality, anyone and not just someone with a relationship such as a husband or wife, would comfort a person in distress like he was last night.
Though you were determined because even if you hadn’t clearly admitted to yourself that Jimin, as infuriating his fluctuating moods and sometimes unyielding rigid personality, meant something to you – you were not going to give up. Not that you had much of a choice anymore because you couldn’t just up and leave. You were bound to Jimin by every royal law out there and before, that seemed like the worst life sentence. But you were happy that you’d made a life for yourself with genuine friendships and your ever growing romance with Jimin. Never did you think that the mere thought of him would make you blush so much. And now you were. Blushing furiously while you brushed your hair as Haejin tidied up in the back.
“Are you feeling okay, Princess?”
“Huh? P-Pardon?” You could see Haejin looking slyly at you. As if she didn’t really care about the answer.
“You’re looking awfully rosy.” Her tone appears to be playful teasing first. Until she opens her mouth again when you duck your head in embarrassment. “The prince has that affect doesn’t he? I would know.”
“I beg your pardon?” The words slip out before you can control your reaction and you can feel your heart skip a beat. What does that mean?
“Don’t you worry your pretty little head, Princess.” It was as if this was a completely different Haejin that what you’d been witnessing before. Maybe on the first day you’d been here but never did you think that you’d be right about your suspicions. That she had some sort of relationship with your husband. And you were not exactly happy with her condescending tone right now. Haejin just smiles at you through the mirror as she finishes folding the feathery blankets before she tip-toes out the door, curtseying to you as she leaves.
What in the lord’s name was that supposed to mean? Did Jimin harbour some sort of feelings for her? Even if he did, it wouldn’t have been allowed in the first place due to her place as a palace worker. Though you were entirely speculating at this point, your silly heart was hurting already at even the thought of Jimin being involved with another woman. You wanted to be the only one and as silly as this sounded even in your head – you wanted Jimin to wholly belong to you. The more you got to know him, the harder it was becoming to be apart. And even though he was still on castle grounds, you felt like it had been a lifetime since you’d been able to smell is earthy scent.
The creaking open of the chamber doors is unnoticed by your ears as you stare off in to the distance, still absentmindedly brushing your hair. Jimin’s solemn reflection in the mirror however has you turning back fast. Something didn’t feel right.
“Are… are you alright?” He doesn’t look at you right away. His face was set in harsh lines, the way you have mostly seen him as of late.
You get up from your vanity chair, making your way to the window where he stood, looking out of the castle. Jimin stood quietly as if in deep thought, hands inside his trouser pockets. It may not have been the best time for your body to react the way it does, shuddering as you take in his attractive stance and the way the muscles in his back appeared prominent below his thin blouse. He was the epitome of beauty.
“I’m fine. I’m… fine.” The sigh doesn’t go unnoticed by you. The Prince sounds deeply troubled with whatever that is occupying his mind. You desperately hoped that your growing closeness would mean that your husband would open up to you a bit more freely. Yet, it seems that you will have to probe and prod at him to let you share his troubles and worries and maybe ease his pain.
Jimin doesn’t turn around to even spare you a glance. It’s almost as if he’s going out of his way to avoid looking your way and you don’t understand what happened in the small timeframe he was away from you. “Jimin, please talk to me. What’s the matter?”
Your hands go to take his wrist in to yours, still standing behind him as you look up at his stoic face. He doesn’t budge. And you try again. “Jimin? Are you due to leave again? Is that… Is that what’s troubling you?”
He just shakes his head but only to dismiss your questions – not as an answer to them. Why was he acting so distant again? Why does this feel like that despite the two steps forward, you’d taken several back?
Your body moves at its own accord as you take a step forward, slipping your hands up his chest trying your best to have him just look at you. “Can I help-”
“Enough! You can’t help me!” Jimin’s outburst is unexpected and his loud voice so close to you makes you flinch backwards like you’ve been burned. If he notices you flinch, he doesn’t comment. He’s looking at you like he’s helpless. Eyes blown wide while the clench in his jaw intensifies. You’d figured to some extent that Jimin was not in the carefree, lively mood he’d left the chambers in. Everything about him looked… hostile. It’s like someone had brought him back to default. Reverting him back in to the closed off, austere and indifferent man you’d become used to but had hoped could change.
You’re not sure what you looked like but the expression on your face must have brought Jimin back from the episode of rage he’d flown in. He’s reaching out to you – hands trying to grasp yours. You step back out of instinct, not wanting to upset him further and it breaks his heart to see you back away. “W-Why are you being like this?”
The tears pool in your eyes before you can stop them and Jimin’s attempts to touch you intensify, wanting to wipe away the hurt from your face. “I’m so sorry, love. I’m…. sorry.”
Jimin’s head hangs low, hands resigning by his side while he lets the tears escape. What had happened for him to be so fraught? All the times in the past, you’d always been able to tell yourself that you could do something about the many mishaps that occurred between the two of you. This time, however, it seemed different. You felt a thousand miles away from your husband and to see him so troubled made you feel helpless.
“Y/n...,” Jimin is moving forwards with a new fire in his eyes, desperation lacing his every movement as his callous hands cup your face.
“Listen to me. There are forces, in this castle that want to take you away from me. And I... I knew that when the time came, I would have to give you up. But... But that was before I- I felt this way. I can’t let you be taken away from me. I will not give you up.”
“What do you mean? Jimin, please. T-Tell me.”
Now it’s you who is desperately trying to look him in the eyes, hands coming up to hold him by his elbows. Trying to gauge some sort of explanation for his odd confession. Who was going to take your away from him? How did he know this already but had not thought to tell you anything before? Did he always know you would be discarded?
“Jimin... please. What is happening?”
“I’m so sorry. I... I will do whatever it takes to keep you by my side. I won’t let anyone hurt you.”
“Jimin!” You’re hysterical just as much as him. Trying to shake him from his delirium. And for once he stops, watching you pull away to gather your thoughts. “What are you not telling me?”
The eerie silence that follows is enough to tell you that this wasn’t an ordinary secret. Did you really want to find out? Maybe living in ignorance will be better than knowing the wholehearted truth but it was too late. You harboured too many feelings for the man across from you to let this go. You needed to know what he was implying.
“Before... Before you were betrothed to me, The King had made a plan. A plan to use your father’s royal relations in exchange for the manpower we would provide. As a token of good faith and to make sure that the two kingdoms will be united after decades of war, your father had suggested that I will take you as my bride. In order to test my father’s truthfulness and to strengthen the alliance. But the king... my father. He’s a cruel man Y/n. He always gets his way. He always sets his own rules and most of all - his pride is what matters to him most.”
Each word escaping Jimin’s mouth makes your stomach churn further and further. Your father had offered you up as a peace offering like you were a lamb to slaughter. You had made yourself believe that he needed to protect his people and that you understood. But it didn’t ease the pain. Especially after hearing it from your husband’s mouth. Because you had a feeling something more grim was coming.
“Go on.” You’re holding on the bedpost, standing much farther than before and now the distance you had felt before had become physical.
Jimin is silent for a few more seconds before he speaks again. Shame and regret lacing his every word making you feel sick.
“My father had decided to agree with yours. To continue with the alliance. In front of your father anyway. He played the part of a dutiful and loyal king, bettering the circumstances during his reign by bringing you here. But... that’s not the case. He told me to not... not take your maidenhood. To keep my distance from you until he had what he needed. And then, he was going to send you back.”
“You see, he finds a way. He always finds a way to make everything dance to his beat. And the law dictates that if a royal bride is virginal, if the marriage hasn’t been consummated... it is not real.”
“No church will be able to stand against my father and declare him a sinner if I... If I had kept my distance. I- My love for you is real, my love. Please.”
The wetness on your cheeks is registered only when Jimin has stopped speaking. You were crying silently, without even knowing that teardrops were falling steadily from your face. The realisation that this whole marriage was a sham, that it was a carefully orchestrated affair was shattering you into tiny little pieces.
“You agreed to it.” it may have been a whisper but Jimin’s pained eyes heard you fine and clear.
He was rooted in place, watching you crumble against the bed, seconds away from madness.
“That was before. Please, Y/n.”
“Yet you continued toying with my heart.” your whole world was crashing down.
Nothing could have prepared for your husband’s complicit partaking in such an ugly scheme. How could a human being do this to another? Were you in love with a man who had no regard for another’s life? Was he really a changed man or this was his way of covering up his slip up from before? Why did you feel so uncertain about everything? So, so lost and betrayed and hurt and anguish.
“Please, Y/n. I love you. I loved you the day I met you I just took too long to realise it. I-I won’t let anything happen.”
“Do you? How am I to believe that? I was merely a temporary whore to warm your bed. Was I not?”
“Don’t say that. Please.” Jimin is kneeling in front of you, trying to hold you. Show you that he’s telling the truth and you so desperately want to believe him.
But you weren’t naive. He was loyal to his kingdom. Just like your father was. Just like his father was.
“You can’t keep me. You... you won’t keep me. You don’t have the power to.” Bringing your hand unto his face, you stroke across the chiselled bones, watching his pretty, puffy eyes looking at you with just longing.
“I don’t have power over myself. I’m merely, a body to be shuffled as the people in my life please, aren’t I? I have no autonomy. I’m no one.”
The words tumbled out of you without any hesitation. At this point, you were speaking to yourself more than Jimin. Because it was true. Just like your father, Jimin was loyal to the crown. And when the time came, you knew he would obey his father. And you will have to leave. You’ll go back to the place that had essentially exiled you. You belonged nowhere.
“Please, darling. Don’t say that. You’re the besting to have ever happened to me. I will keep you safe.”
“How? You don’t love me! You think you do. To ease your guilt. You don’t... love me.”
“I do and I will prove it to you.” For once, it was not you trying to gain Jimin’s favour.
After months and months of trying to build something between the two of you, you realised that it was futile. You’d been making yourself into a fool all the while he had known that this could go nowhere. Yet, to keep you from suspecting, he’d gone along the few times he had been present with you.
“Just... Just leave me be. Please, my lord. Just grant me some solitude.”
Jimin’s eyes are as vacant as your heart and you know that your refusal to say his name was your small step of retaliation. Nonetheless, he listens. Dropping a kiss to your forehead, he backs away. Watching you huddle within yourself - melancholy taking over the air.
“I won’t give up, Y/n.”
Oh how you wished that would’ve held true.
a/n: it won't hurt this much next chapter i promise.
