headcanons pt.1
crowley gives all his plants to someone else. like to this young-lady-who-will-give-this-lil-guy-too-much-water. or to this old lady downstairs
aziraphale sometimes uses words that has been uncommon for millenia or more (1). like wit, git, uncer and incer.
when they both gets drunk, they start to mix all languages they remember. like as if you took 10k+ languages and put them in mixer. that's how their conversation will sound. that's why they avoid drinking with humans. humans get really anxious when someone speaks in mix of dead languages, remembering history of very old days and talks about dead people as if they knew them well.
crowley once went to maya civilisation and spent a very nice holiday. did you ever hear of kukulkan?
aziraphale left a mark, too, but somewhere else. shahrevar or kshathra vairya, you know. this guy with a flaming sword?
sometimes both of them messes with the Time. like "oh, try this tasty orange. oh? where did i get it from? this one will grow next summer in china, there'll be a very sunny summer, so oranges will be sweeter" or "this sounds like *put a name* is playing on *put an instrument*!" "you're right. it's them"
crowley is good in polish (2)
aziraphale is good in japanese (3)
(1) i just found out about some pronounces from more than a millenia ago, which was only for two of people. dual number pronounce. oh my, it's so beautiful
(2) snaky-tongue, remember?
(3) and how to say politely "go away and eat something very unpleasant, which sounded wonderful until you ate it", smiling with all precense, but you can say that you-shalln't-appear-in-front-of-him-again-and-try-to-pray-for-all-your-sins*
*but mostly it'll sound as if he complements you, but afterwards you realise that he just danced on all the buttons and you didn't even notice. and then you don't know what to feel: to be delighted to hear such wonderful verbal pirouettes, or to take offence, or to be scared by such imagination.
