hi im new to the blog, just wanna say great writings! abosolutely adore the yandere ones, just <333`
but i checked out your pinned post and the anons say she/her haver and he/they haver, what does that mean exactly?
is it. is it like having a menu special? or treatment? /genuine
can i have a she/her treatment?? is that how it works??
what does this mean? what do they mean? im genuinely confused and would really appreaciate some guidance on what that means since i have a friend that has she/they pronouns ,but i dont really understand what that means and i really want to get it right since it seems important to them and i dont want to offend her (or is it them??? i dont know really...) but everyone around me arent found of lgbt and arent knowledable abt this without bias (the mean kind unfortuantely :( ).
you dont have to answer this, not even an ask really. feel free to ignore this! ill just sit in my confused corner
Thank you! I do my best with what I write. :)
You may already know what some of this means but I'm still going to start at the beginning just incase.
So (gendered) pronouns are just what someone uses to refer to someone else in the third person.
Preferred pronouns are just what someone likes other people to call them for whatever reason.
Like I use he/they/she pronouns. I am genderfluid and my expression fluctuates, so I am comfortable with people using these.
A non-binary person may use they/them because they don't feel that they fit into either the man (typically he/him) or woman (typically she/her) category.
A set of pronouns doesn't automatically mean someone is a specific gender. Like a person that uses they/them could be non-binary, agender, or a couple different things.
Gender is complicated and personal. I know you asked about pronouns so I'm trying to keep it simple.
Your friend has she/they pronouns so they don't mind being called either a she or a they.
Sometimes if people are called multiple pronouns then they may have a preference for it. Like some people would prefer you mix it up and use both she and they. Some people don't care. You could always call them she/her or they/them. I'd suggest asking your friend if she wants you to use both she and they in conversation or just use whatever feels most natural to you in the moment.
Sometimes if someone uses multiple pronouns they can get upset if you only use one set because it feels like you don't see them as they want to be seen, only as you find it most comfortable to refer to them as.
When I put _/_ haver it just means that those are the pronouns that anon prefers to be referred to by. So if I or someone else is referring to them in the third person we are being respectful to their identity.
I'm glad you asked a trans person about this and wanted to honestly learn. 𖹭
I hope the explanation wasn't too confusing because it can be a lot.