"nonbinary people are included in every orientation" doesn't mean "all nonbinary people are included in all orientations", it means "there are nonbinary people who feel comfortable being included in different orientations". i for one am not included in your straightness, lesbianism or gay male attraction because i'm not male or female lite. i'm not included in anything associated with or centred around binary gender.
when you use it to mean "all nonbinary people are included in all orientations" you ARE erasing nonbinary people by basically saying we are whatever gender fits someone's orientation, rather than someone's orientation maybe being different than previously thought or simply having exceptions.
there are nonbinary ppl who feel included in all orientations. there are nonbinary ppl who feel included only in queer orientations. there are nonbinary ppl who feel included only in orientations that are associated with loving women. there are nonbinary ppl who feel included only in orientations associated with loving men. there are nonbinary ppl who only feel included in multi-gender attraction. there are nonbinary ppl who only feel included in orientations that explicitly include us. there are nonbinary people who only feel included in lesbian, straight or gay attraction from other transgender and nonbinary people. there are nonbinary people who decide on a case by case basis.
LET US HAVE NUANCE. stop flattening us into whatever fits your narrative. we're not a blank slate you can just project things on.
if you're straight and attracted to me, you're either not as straight as you think or i'm the exception to your straightness (like for my partner), but i am NEVER included unless you view me as basically a woman or basically a man. the same is true for gay men and lesbians for me.
i get to decide what includes me and what doesn't.
