#itnwm

[theotherbones]

[theotherbones]

In The Night With Me // An Album By The Other Bones // 2017

[theotherbones]

In The Night With Me // An Album By The Other Bones // 2017

[theotherbones]

[theotherbones]

[brambleandmoors]

Into the night (with me) - a kurtbastian fan fiction (7/? UPDATE!)

Into the Night 

author: Bluejeanzangel

link to chapter 6

read on FF.NET

****

7. In too deep

Kurt hadn't heard of Sebastian since that night he revealed him his fears.

Two days had passed since then. It was typical of him, though: the closer they got, the farther he pushed him.

When he had woken up, he was alone. Sebastian was nowhere in sight and as he went down to the kitchen, he found Willa sipping an orange juice listening to her silver i-Pod. She had taken off her earplugs and informed him Sebastian had to leave early for work.

She also apologized for how the night ended, but Kurt didn't enquire further. Enough drama for one day only.

She said he was welcomed to stay, but he couldn't.

He had declined her offer making up an excuse, and reached his car quickly, feeling the urge to leave that place as soon as possible. As he got home, he wished he had Dumbledore's pensive because of all the thoughts he wanted to lock away.

That day, thinking about Sebastian, he realized there was always something that escaped him about that boy. And the worst thing was that, the more he couldn't get hold of him, the more he felt dragged towards him.

That same night, when Kurt was too numb from sleep and tiredness to think straight, he had sent him a message he was sure he would comprehend:

I'm not afraid to walk into the night.

But Sebastian never answered him…

…'Till two days later.

15/06/13 10:17 a.m.

Perv: Are you in for coffee?

Kurt read the message and typed back quickly the very first thing that had crossed his mind:

Pretty Woman: It's alive!

Perv: Indeed… Dr. Frankenstein

The boy was smart. More than Kurt could have ever imagined.

Pretty Woman: you read too much

Perv: I pay attention to details, it's different.

Pretty Woman: *rolls his eyes excessively*

He hadn't heard from him for days, and it took him a couple of messages to make everything seem right between the two of them.

15/06/13 11:02 a.m.

Perv: So… Lima Bean, 3 p.m.?

15/06/13 11:24 a.m.

Pretty Woman: Okay

Pretty Woman: But I may not recognize you, it's not like you have been around lately

Perv: I'll be the one wearing the brown raincoat only

Pretty Woman: you're sick.

Perv: I know you want me

Pretty Woman: Perv.

Everything seemed to be back to normal between the two of them.

But was it really?

…

"You're late", Sebastian greeted him

"I'm not"

"It's 10 past 3"

"That's not being late"

"Whatever"

Kurt sat and looked at him expectantly. He had been asking himself if it would have been awkward between them, after the other night. But Sebastian seemed his ordinary self. Which meant he was totally hiding something.

No one talked for a while, until Kurt asked:

"Didn't you invite me for coffee? Shall we order it?", but actually meaning: 'Did you want to talk? Shall we?'

"I…", Sebastian started hesitantly "Well, I wanted to, but you arrived late and put me off!", he said and Kurt got: 'I wanted to, but I've been left too much time to think, and now I don't feel up to anymore'

"But why don't you ask the blonde bartender if he gives you one", he winked "ask for his special one, you'll be surprised". 'But I hope we are okay'

"You forget that I, unlike you, am not a slut… I have a sense of moral decency". 'We are'

"I was talking about coffee! You're the one who thinks dirty!" . 'We are'

"Sure, you innocent kid" –Since when he started to get Sebastian? Since when the word 'fake' had been crossed out from their sort of 'friendship'?

Anyway, now he was in too deep to back off.

"Have you been working?"

"Yeah, there was a mess the other day in East Columbus"

"What happened?"

"Okay", he started impassioned "follow me: there was this lady who stole a car and started chasing this other guy, because he ate her car keys and… no wait! I forgot that…ehm…first he had apparently cheated on her and that was why she wanted to left him… and so he ate the keys… but then she called her brother and all her family was suddenly involved and when they heard he had cheated on her and ate her keys, they called for vendetta... so they went to their place, he took off with his pick-up, she took her brother's van and everyone else jumped on their cars and started chasing him too… "

"Oh lord"

"Wait! So, there are about 6 vehicles that chase this white pick-up, the ex-girlfriend in the lead and", he made a dramatic pause "he hits a traffic signal, and she rear-ends him… and then everyone follows her and crashes into one another"

"It can't be true"

"It was absurd! But there's more! They made a fuss in the E.R.! They wanted to punch the guy in the white pick-up, but couldn't find him and ended up getting into a fight and started throwing fists to one another! There were people screaming and people launching stuff! It took hours to actually understand what had been going on!"

"People are crazy"

"You have no idea"

And they looked at each other and laughed, and everything was fixed between them.

"I think I'm gonna grab one of those peanut-butter muffins, do you want one?", Sebastian asked, but Kurt made a disgusted face.

"What?", Sebastian enquired

"I wouldn't do that, if I were you"

"I always have a peanut-butter muffin when I come here", Sebastian stated and Kurt giggled:

"I worked here for a while, and trust me if I tell you that you don't want to know how they make them"

"But why?"

Kurt laughed non-stop thinking of Bob who dries his sweat with the dough, and of Sebastian who eats them all the time.

"Come on! Don't laugh! Tell me!", he insisted

"Oh no no, trust me, you don't want me to… you wouldn't eat a muffin again if I told you"

He couldn't tell Sebastian the truth, fearing his reaction. Even though it would have been amusing to see his face as he discovered the truth. Maybe he could save it for later.

"But they are my favorite!", he wined

"Come on, I'll make you some", Kurt spoke, without giving too much thinking on what he was saying.

"Like making making them?", he asked amused

"You never saw anyone making muffins?"

"No!". Kurt looked at him bewildered.

"When my parents are in town they call Joe, and when it's just us… I mean me and Willa and eventually Ollie, it's Willa who cooks. And she's not that good", he joked

"And what about you?"

"Oh, I inherited my dad glorious skills", he admitted proudly.

Kurt remembered of that time when they told him about the barbecue mess his father made.

"Come on! Let's go! I'll show you how to do muffins… but you're allowed to look, not to touch"

"Yes sir!", he joked.

They chuckled and stood up.

"I'm serious! I want my parents to have a kitchen when they come back!"

"Where are they now?"

"DC. Work stuff"

"Oh, okay"

"It's a busy time for my dad", Kurt told him.

"But, you're okay with it...?". They had reached Kurt's car, and Sebastian leant on it.

"Yeah... I understand… also I know that if it were for him, he would stay at home with me… but he can't… and I appreciate what he does for this place… even if at times I do wish he was here and we could spend some time together but, I know he wishes it too, so… yes, I'm okay with it"

"You're lucky", he admitted softly, looking at his red converse.

"Why do you say so?"

"Because you know that he would rather spend some time with you than at work"

"It's not the same with your dad?", it was meant to be a question, but came out as a statement.

"I should get to my car… wait for me 'cause I don't remember where you live", he said quickly, without looking at him.

"Oh, sure", he replied, but Sebastian was already gone.

He was left puzzled, like all the time, and climbed quickly into his car. As he drove back to his place, all he could think of was: a brick at time… one brick away at time…

…

"No! Don't touch that! Don't!"

"Too late", Sebastian teased him, eating some of the dough with his fingers.

They had been mocking and teasing each other since they arrived. Kurt avoided asking Sebastian about earlier, and Sebastian avoided to bring up the matter.

"Why don't you go and make comfortable on the sofa?", he said pointing at the living room. He couldn't work with him constantly interrupting to ask him why he was doing what he was doing. And why was he doing it that way. It was frustrating.

He had let him stay in case he used some food Sebastian couldn't eat, because when he asked him to write him a list, he had refused saying the list would have been too long to write it down and that he didn't remember every food listed anyway. But he would have observed him and told him if there was something wrong. Kurt knew it was just an excuse to annoy him more.

But now, since he didn't have to add any other ingredient, he was happy to kick him off his kitchen.

"Kay", he nodded and, as he left, he yelled: "Just now I am leaving, you're not throwing me out!"

Kurt giggled.

Not wanting to think too much about Sebastian sprawled on his sofa, he put the muffins in the oven and set the timer. He then took all the dirty bowls and put them in the sink to wash them, when he heard some music play.

Blackbird singing in the dead of night

Take these broken wings and learn to fly

All your life

You were only waiting for this moment to arise

He forgot about the dirty dishes and reached Sebastian. He was seated on the floor, his dad's vinyls scattered on the floor. Blackbird playing in the record player.

He smiled and sat next to him:

"This is one of my favorite song"

"Blackbird?"

"Bird means lady, so the song actually refers to a black lady… the song was meant to support the civil rights movement in 1968, did you know that?"

"I didn't know bird meant woman"

"It's british slang"

"Cool"

"These are all my father's" Kurt said pointing at the vinyls.

"Really?", Sebastian was pleasingly surprised "I already love him! He has such a good taste! Look!", he grabbed a vinyl from The Smiths.

Kurt smiled fondly, thinking of his father.

"We used to listen to these together. It was great. We didn't talk, we just listened"

"Can we have dinner with the muffins?",Sebastian clearly wanted to change the topic. For some reason talking about that subject made him feel uncomfortable. Also, he had just invited himself to dinner.

"Sure" 'Please, Stay' .

They sat in silence listening to The Beatles singing Blackbird fly, Balckbird fly… Like a magic spell the music surrounded them, and he never felt closer to Sebastian than in that very moment. And when it ended, Kurt was left with one desire only: More. He wanted more.

–Of music? Of Sebastian? Of that moments? He didn't know. He didn't want to know.

"Have you ever watched Singing in the rain?"

"Nope"

"Seriously? We have to make up for that!", he exclaimed and went to grab the DVD.

"Put this on, I'm gonna check the muffins and come back"

–Had he just-?

The muffins were ready, he took them off the oven but waited a few minutes before going back to Sebastian. He got to the conclusion their 'fake' friendship wasn't fake anymore… and he couldn't do anything about it. He couldn't go back from where he stood. He was in too deep… –how did that happen, he had no idea.

"So, here you are!", Sebastian's face lit up. Seeing that made Kurt's heart grow fonder. Also, knowing that he was the reason why his face lit up, made him feel weird, weirdly pleased. Sebastian's green amethysts were smiling at him. It was the first time he noticed that color in his eyes. Usually, they were darker. Sapphire green darker.

He was comparing Sebastian eyes to stones. His madness was getting worst. He had to call that shrink.

They moved to the couch and silently ate their muffins as they watched Gene Kelly and Debbie Reynolds perform one of the best musical that had ever been produced.

"That Blaine guy is an idiot", Sebastian spoke out of the blue. His voice was low and honest. He kept looking at the screen without facing Kurt.

"He slept with someone else, that makes him a cheater not an idiot", he replied

"Are you two still together?"

"No. He tried to make up for that but I… I don't know, I don't know if I trust him", he admitted. If Sebastian could share with him some of his deep thoughts, he could too.

"Why would you want him back?", he turned around to face him. His expression was unreadable

"Because he loves me?", he offered

"He does not love you"

"Why would you say so?", Kurt asked annoyed, the movie forgotten.

"If he loved you he wouldn't have broken your heart"

"He made a mistake, I can't forget but that doesn't mean I cannot forgive him, if I wanted to"

"But you don't want to", It wasn't a question.

"I don't know… No, I don't think so", Kurt admitted.

"You shouldn't be questioning that".

Kurt was getting mad at Sebastian: what did he know about relationship? What did he know about hm and Blaine?

"And what do you know about heartbreaks?". Sebastian looked away, remained thoughtful for a while and then spoke with that low, soft tone he used once in a while, when he was talking of personal stuff.

"I know that you can mend a broken heart, but you can't fix it".

He looked at Kurt deeply in the eyes as he spoke, and he stopped breathing.

It was Kurt who looked away. He felt prickling behind his eyes, so he closed them.

"Now that you have the proper setting, can you say it?"

"I'll try… Life was a song,

You came along

I've laid awake the whole night through

If I ever dared to think you'd care

This is what I'd say to you…"

As Gene Kelly sang, Kurt leant his head on Sebastian's shoulder.

"It's hard to let him go", he admitted in a whisper.

"I know". Sebastian moved his arm so that Kurt could lean on more comfortably on his chest.

None of them moved anymore.

Albert Camus once wrote, "Blessed are the hearts that can bend; they shall never be broken."

"But now shut up 'cause I want to see how it ends", he teased him softly. 'I'm here, it'll be all right'

"You're doing all the talking, you shut up", Kurt teased him back, appreciating his tentative to ease the tension off. 'Thank you'

Kurt inhaled deeply, the scent of Sebastian filled his lungs.

Maybe their 'friendship', or whatever it was, wasn't going to be that bad after all.

But I wonder: if there's no breaking then there's no healing, and if there's no healing then there's no learning. And if there's no learning then there's no struggle.

"Do you want to come to the mall tomorrow?" The movie was in his final scenes. "Willa has to pick her dress for our father's 50eth birthday… she could use some of your stereotyped gay sense of style", Sebastian eyes were fixed on the screen.

"You're an ass... But it's okay, I guess"

"We'll pick you up around 2 p.m…"

"Okay"

                              But the struggle is a part of life.

"Thanks for… the other night", Sebastian spoke. The movie had just ended.

Maybe he had really thought on Kurt's words. Maybe they had really hit him. Maybe, he was really trying to put down his walls… one brick at time.

"My back still hurts, you owe me" 'I wouldn't have left you'

Sebastian smirked. 'I know'

                                 So must all hearts be broken?

****

Title inspired by: In Too Deep, Sum41.

Voiceover quote: One Tree Hill, S5E11

LINK TO CHAPTER 8