I can’t believe Key made Taemin wear one of those on body anti theft purses on drip drop so that Taem wouldn’t lose his passport while being in the middle of the fucking Desert.

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I can’t believe Key made Taemin wear one of those on body anti theft purses on drip drop so that Taem wouldn’t lose his passport while being in the middle of the fucking Desert.
Attempts to escape. Sometime between 1994 & 1998. I took an outdoor survival class in high school. As an avid claustrophobic, I shuddered in horror when they announced we'd be taking a field trip to some CAVES. Yes, you heard that right. This brilliant teacher thought it would be fun to take a bunch of inexperienced high school students into caves that can literally kill you. Now most who live in this area and have any knowledge of MO outdoor life know that caves are among some of the biggest dangers in the area. #spelunking (the sport or practice of exploring caves) should be left to those with the experience, equipment and fortitude (that I honestly find as just another kind of crazy) to withstand any danger that can sometimes happen in these depths of h*ll. Though I had a panic attack going in, I needed to pass the class so I ignored it. A group of us got lost. Inexplicably turned around and literally lost in these caves. I cried. I believed I would die, crouched between a rock and a hard place. We screamed, shoved ourselves into spaces 2 inches wide only to realize we had just gone in further. Eventually we were found and when my face felt the fresh air of open-ness I vowed never to be enclosed in any space ever again. That feeling, that real soul-deep horror that I thought I was going to die has never left me. I actually still have dreams that bring back the trauma of it all. The moral: 1.) For the sake of all that is holy, listen to your inner voice. It's there to keep you from danger. And it's a very real warning sign. 2.) School sucks and sometimes it's very possible for you to be smarter than your teacher. Teaching degrees don't always equate to common sense. 3.) That rock and a hard place - it totally sucks the life out of you. Literally. #art #design #bellesandghosts #missysuehanson #bewildandwonder #typespire #goodtype #stories #itreallyhappened #silhoutte #illustration #type #typography #lettering #skull #handlettering #handlettered #livefolk #happysaturday #vsco #vscocam #vscogood
When you’re reading an actual paper book and attempt to scroll down the page with your thumb… #itreallyhappened #getoffmylawn https://www.instagram.com/p/CYTPtoqr8ea/?utm_medium=tumblr
Somebody wanted tuna while they were asleep but gravity said hold up! You are asleep! You can’t carry something while you’re in this state! And gravity was right - people who are asleep can’t carry bowls of tuna so it was dropped and the bowl was broken and the tuna wasted. Oh well - you’d think a lesson is learned but I don’t think that a lesson will be learned because people who are asleep want what they want and things are Just going to happen #sleep #sleepwalking #sleepeating #narcolepsy #itreallyhappened #dogkisserinternationalheadquarters (at Dogkisser International Headquarters) https://www.instagram.com/p/CADKworH68S/?igshid=ondbggaj58cu
I’ve done it!
It's been a while since I've posted something substantial, but now that the residency permit has come through I've got some breathing room, 11 months in fact!! So, it might get lengthy, but here is everything that happened as I remembered and experienced it.
To get a residency permit you fill out your initial application. That part isn't too difficult, as long as you already have a job offer. You must have a job offer before your application means anything. Then you wait for them to ask for follow up, because it seems there is always follow up to your initial application. That tends to be corrections, additional information, or something similar, and there was definitely some additional information needed about my job.
Next you'll get a letter in the mail, because everything is sent by mail by the Auslӓnderbehӧrde (Residency Office). This letter lets you know what you will need to bring to your appointment, and that you need to go to the Auslӓnderbehӧrde to get a "Wartenummer" (waiting number) in order to get an appointment. Here's where the real story begins.
After several cultural and translation miscommunications occurred, which for me is most likely way easier than most internationals seeking a residency permit, I show up at the Auslӓnderbehӧrde to get this Wartenummer. I show up around 11am, wait in line for about 60 minutes (that's on average around that time of day). When I get to the service desk they tell me all the Wartenummer have already been given out for the day and that I will need to show up the next day to get one. I ask how early I should show up the next day and they said people start to show up around 8am. Keep in mind, the next day they actually open up at 1pm, so that means if I want a Wartenummer I have to show up around 8am and wait for 5 hours before I get a Wartenummer.
Ok, no big deal, I pack some stuff to keep me busy and head down there the next morning. I show up 15 minutes before 8am and there are already 16 people ahead of me in line. I think to myself at this point that I'm still pretty early. I wait around for a couple of hours, get really cold and whine at Jens to bring me coffee. When he shows up I don't think I had ever shivered in my life that much, and by that time everyone waiting in line had a general understanding that movement and standing in the sun from time to time to keep warm wasn't going to lose your spot. Thankfully so, I was having a hard time of it. Luckily around 11am they opened the doors and allowed people into the warming interior waiting space, even though they aren't actually open, and give people a small piece of paper with their spot in line. This means you can now come and go until they officially open at 1pm. So I have lunch with Jens and then go back inside. When I finally get to the service counter again, pretty soon after 1pm because I was number 17, I find out all the Wartenummer are gone. I'm confused because I assumed that the slip of paper was the Wartenummer I was waiting for. I come to find out that no, actually, that was just the number in line, not the Wartenummer for appointments. But at this point they go ahead and schedule an actual appointment for me on the 6th of May. Which wasn't that far ahead and all, but still after my start date for work.
So, at this point I have an appointment to get my residency permit, albeit after my start date at work. So I bike off to work from the Auslӓnderbehӧrde to explain my situation...
Ah, I forgot to mention that biking to the Auslӓnderbehӧrde takes about 30 minutes, so every time I had to go there it was a bit of a bike ride. Not bad, it just took planning, right?
Side note: I often would get a bit lost on my way there because I was always searching for a more direct route, as I kept missing a certain on ramp (somehow) that would take me over the main tracks from the Frankfurt Main train station. You can see those tracks on the map above, they are quite substantial. Often my bike tires would get low on air, like really low, so biking was super painful (eventually I got them aired up), also I loaded down the bike with a sleeping bag and other gear to make the waiting easier and the bike was just heavy to begin with.
...but back to the main story. I arrive at work and tell them my story. Me: "I have an appointment for my residency permit but it's not until after my start date" *sad face* (see other definition; dejected duck face). Work: "That's cool, but can you please try to get a cancelled appointment (that really means Wartenummer)? Otherwise we have to redo all your paperwork." *slightly annoyed face* (see other definition; it's always hard being an immigrant get with the program...face)
Alrighty then..the next day the Auslӓnderbehӧrde opens at 8am. At this point I figure, I arrived 5 hours early for them opening at 1pm, but since this is really early in the morning I'll show up at 4am and see if that is early enough. This time I'm prepared with a sleeping bag, a thick coat and tea...I'm ready for it all! I arrive at 3:45am to find the doors already open, and I'm Wartenummer 22. Ok, I'm probably not early enough for an appointment but I'll wait 4 hours and try anyways.
Side note: During this whole process I learned all kinds of new sleeping positions, and I learned how little I really care about sleeping weirdly in front of other people, and vice versa.
And...no Wartenummer.
That evening (I think, it's still a bit of a blur), Jens and I are out with some friends of his of which many are internationals, and I share my story. At the dinner table I heard their stories, and one story was of a person who showed up at midnight in order to get a Wartenummer at 8am. More information I find out is that there are often only 2 available Wartenummer per day, because it's all based on how many unexpected cancelled appointments there were for that day.
Woah there...ok, I'm a bit intimidated at this point. But I'm like, ok this is my dream, work hard to get your dream right? I can wait overnight at the Auslӓnderbehӧrde, I can totally do this. You see, as an american I'm sitting here thinking the following, "I'm going to be by myself, in the dark, sitting outside this building, near a slightly industrial area in the middle of a big city". I'm nervous..and I can hear my relatives telling me not to do it because it's too dangerous. You see I've been told not to go running alone late at night (that means after 8pm) in the US. So for many europeans/germans they think I'm this crazy american, being scared. That still doesn't mean I'm not fighting against my cultural instincts here.
Anyways, the next time I arrive at the Auslӓnderbehӧrde I show up at 10:45pm, because they are to open at 7:30am the next day...
Side note: Did I mention they have different operating hours every day, so I had to reassess each day when I was to arrive? And as my story progressed I learned new information so I was continually having to reassess my arrival time.
...I have my gear, I'm ready. I show up and there are already 15 people in line. At this point I'm like, what the f**k there is no point in staying, but seriously folks. I ask those waiting when they showed up to wait in line and I'm greeted with crickets. No one is talking (or they don't understand english or german, either way), and when I thought about it, it was obvious. You don't want to share because in case you don't get an appointment you'll have to show up again the next day.
Side note: Just because they often have approx. 2 Wartenummer for cancelled appointments that doesn't mean they actually have them every day. Sometimes they don't have any Wartenummer because no one cancels. That means you might be waiting in line for your Wartenummer for five hours with nothing to show for it.
Eventually one person did pipe up and state that she showed up at 10pm and there were 20 others that had shown up but left, and that they had friends holding their place, so there were in fact more like 35 people in line at that point.
So I'm stressed, right? When exactly am I going to be able to make this work? How early do I really need to show up? How can I make this work when I have to use a restroom overnight? Would I need to buy that tool to allow women to pee like men and bring a bottle? Or would I need to find the German version of Depends to make it work?
Then Easter weekend shows up on me, something I hadn't even thought about because all I did every day was think about the Auslӓnderbehӧrde. I find out that their hours changed for Thursday, and that Friday and Monday they wouldn't be open for the holiday weekend. At this point, there wasn't anything else I could even do until Tuesday. But...oh wait..on Tuesdays they aren't even open, so I can't try to get an appointment until Wednesday!
So...my plan became this. I'll drop by work on Tuesday, explain the situation, and see if they are willing to push my start date to past my appointment on the 6th of May so my new start date would be the 15th of May. I arrive at work and no one's there, still on vacation from the Easter Holiday it seems. I send an email and get an automated response saying anyone who can make such a decision isn't there, but they will be back the next day. Alrighty then...Let's try again at the Auslӓnderbehӧrde.
I figured I would show up on Tuesday night around 7pm-ish, see what the line looks like and if it's bad already I will simply go to work on Wednesday and try to explain in person. I had bought myself a camp chair at some point to make the whole process easier too, so I bring that instead of a sleeping bag this time as the weather had gotten a lot warmer. At this point I'm pretty pessimistic that I'll get a Wartenummer. Here's a picture of me when I get there at 725pm.
I was the first one to show up! I couldn't believe it, I was so flabbergasted. I set up my chair, brought out my waiting gear (see other definition: kindle, phone with downloaded Netflix episodes, Spotify playlists). Not more than 30 minutes after I showed up someone else arrived, said that they normally start a list, and then he made a list with my name first, and then he wrote his name and left. I wasn't sure about the list thing, I hadn't heard about it before, so I figured I would stay to be sure.
It was a pretty nice evening so the first 3 hours were no big deal. Around 9pm people started showing up. Around 10pm it started to get a bit cold but I had brought my down jacket so I was ok. I started drifting in and out of sleep. I remember bolting awake just after midnight hearing the, I believe, turkish guy who had been sitting next to me holding people back saying I was first in line, as they had just opened the doors to let us in to wait inside. Kind of bleary eyed and panicky I grabbed my things and went inside. It didn't really matter though, because the security guy who let us in just took the list, after confirming everyone was on it, and then we waited another 2 hours. Weird sleeping positions abounded, but somehow snoring never showed up.
I definitely slept some more inside. Warm, in my camp chair (me and that camp chair are now good friends), I waited. At 2am we all got our little slips of paper, which I coveted and stored securely before I jumped on my bike and took off for home.
I had hoped to get some more sleep when I got home, but after that 25 minute bike ride I was awake again. I also knew I had to wake up in 3 hours to bike back to the Auslӓnderbehӧrde, so I was nervous to fall asleep in case I didn't actually wake up with my alarm. Instead I just took it easy, ate some food, packed my paperwork and headed back out there around 5:45ish. I show up and…
Side Note: I waited in one particular spot in the waiting area inside when I showed back up and the other 5 after me in line gravitated towards me and waited around me like I was a beacon. It was rather strange and humorous, or perhaps I was just sleep deprived?
...finally my number gets called at 8am when they open. I got an actual Wartenummer! Hallelujah!! I go upstairs for the open appointment. I go inside, bring all my paperwork out, and after 10 minutes of review they find a missing piece of information.
Unfortunately it was on the paperwork confirming my living situation, something only Guillaume could officially answer as the owner of the apartment. It's even more unfortunate because he's currently in Argentina for work. I had no idea when he would even wake up, let alone see a message from me about the situation. At this point I'm like, s**t, I was first in line but I'm still not going to get this finished today. Luckily she tells me an email from him confirming such and such is fine, and that if they get the email before 2pm that day I can show up and go straight back upstairs to that room and finish processing my paperwork. Also, that if I don't hear back from him before 2pm, I need to email them an update and they will try to fit me in before I'm supposed to start work. Ok, I'm exhausted, but I bike off to work to give them an update. That maybe, just maybe, I can start on the 1st of May.
Then I bike home, super exhausted now...wait wait, I stopped off at the store first and bought a pastry and some pringles because I'm also super hungry at this point, and go home. Oh man, I was beat walking through that store. If it had been slightly worse I might have been drooling as I walked around.
So now I'm laying on the couch for the next couple of hours, trying to stay slightly awake in case I get a message from Guillaume or the Auslӓnderbehӧrde. Then around 10:15am Guillaume messages me like the Superman that he is. Guillaume: "Is there still time?" Me: "Are you wearing a cape?" *something akin to Avengers/Superman theme music is now playing in my sleep deprived brain...OMG I'm so happy at this point*. He quickly sends the necessary email, and the previously super exhausted me who is now wide awake takes a quick shower and jumps back on her bike to bike back, a 3rd time, to the Auslӓnderbehӧrde.
I get there with 30 minutes to spare before their lunch break. The person helping me is also training someone else so I guess it takes 5 more minutes for my paperwork to get finished. The actual processing time for the paperwork was so short, but everything leading up to it was so drawn out and exhausting, I was stunned at the end.
Me: "Das War's?" (definition: that's it?)
Nice Lady: "Ja." (see other definition: ah you're so cute, what did you expect?)
Elated I bike off to the copy shop to make copies of my Aufenthaltstitle for work. I'm almost dancing on my bike, singing to the music on my phone. I'm overjoyed that it's finally done! I make copies, and dropped them off at work. Once home I'm so exhausted but still awake that it took me a bit but eventually I passed out. I think I passed out around...2pm? I'm not sure really. I just know I snacked hard on peanuts and chocolate before I fell asleep. I woke up this morning just before 6am, and have been until now writing this all up for ya'll to enjoy.
Ok, this was a bit drawn out, but seriously guys the whole process was intense. There were several times these past few weeks when I wanted to cry because of messed up sleeping schedules, unknowns, and the fear of having to leave the country and then come back in three months because I might have missed something.
Revelation: I have an even more profound respect for immigrants now. I have an inkling of what it must be like for people waiting in lines for things like water in 3rd world countries.
I met some really interesting people during this experience. The people waiting in line like me were from everywhere but europe or the US. I met some interesting people from Japan, Taiwan, Tunisia, Uzbekistan, Turkey, and India. Those were the people who I actually bothered to ask where they came from. They were also the people who understood what I was asking. I honestly cannot imagine how hard it must have been for those who didn't speak much english or german.
I have a request for anyone reading this blog entry. After reading my small commentary as someone without much of a language barrier and a lot of local help I hope I can share this with you all. This process for me was exhausting, confusing, and at times frightening. But can you imagine, after reading my tale, just how much harder it must be for those trying to immigrate in Germany or the US, who didn't have the help I did? How hard it must be for those who don't know the languages I know, and...for those who didn't have the skin tone I have? Let's also mention that I was, by far, the worst dressed out of the bunch. Oregonians, already known as rather lowkey in attire for the US, and here I am in jeans and a hoodie waiting in line next to others dressed super nice. Despite that I feel I still had an easier time of it simply from the lack of language barrier, and I'm sure some unconscious white privilege that came along with it.
Whelp my coffee's gone cold, and I'm starting to get hungry. Thanks to everyone who has supported me on this journey, a life goal of mine, to live and work in Germany as an adult. I didn't realize just how much of a dream this was until after leaving that office. The sunny bike ride from the Auslӓnderbehӧrde to work, when I should have been exhausted, was one of sheer joy. A life experience that I hope I never forget. With this I leave you with my theme song during this adventure, "Can't Knock the Hustle" by Weezer.
“I saw a pillar of light exactly over my head, above the brightness of the sun, which descended gradually until it fell upon me. “… When the light rested upon me I saw two Personages, whose brightness and glory defy all description, standing above me in the air. One of them spake unto me, calling me by name and said, pointing to the other—This is My Beloved Son. Hear Him!” #ItReallyHappened (at Muir Woods National Monument) https://www.instagram.com/p/BpKAgteASufIt4lIzhxKwXTUuQ2n_zRVxwe9OY0/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=eyyjxa9dzqp
@ronniekingofficial - #TBT That one time I played #keyboards on a @mrmccane record. #History #itreallyhappened #hiphopclassic #Johnnyj
#TBT That one time I played #keyboards on a @mrmccane record. #History #itreallyhappened #hiphopclassic #Johnnyj (at Newport Beach Yacht Club - Private Club)