#itslateatnight

[dolphinitlyneedshelp]

she feels invicible all the time and that’s like her superpower

[momovo]

Thoughts, concerns, but no rage.

It’s kind of weird isn’t it? Relationships. Not just in a romantic way, but all of them in general. Each one different from the other, in the sense they give each provide you with something different. I find reassurance in knowing I have built relationships in places all over. Austria, to El Salavador, to New Jersey, to Australia, all the way back to California. I’m lucky to say the least. I don’t really know what I’m going with this, I think I’m just in my feels. I just put a lot into all of them, so when I see one fleeting it brings me so much sadness. Cause now it’s late at night and all I think about is all the friendships that have come and gone. At the time I had no idea where I would be today, I had no idea the person I would become, the people I would meet, the decisions I’d make. It feels so surreal. 

You know, I still think about the lame little crushes I had in elementary school. The first boy I ever liked, I wonder what he’s doing now, I wonder if we’d be friend he hadn’t moved away. I wonder if he still likes Star Wars, or if him and his brother get along. All of this so silly, but I’m embarrassed to admit I think about this not often, but definitely more than I should. I’m happy for the memories though. The two that I remember. The nice lunch times, and the swings.

What I guess I am trying to say is I appreciate all the memories I have with all the relationships I have accumulated in my life time. All the frustration. All the laughter. All the sadness. All the deep conversations. It’s been a pleasure. 

I look forward to all of the memories to come whether the be worry-free or filled with stress, bring it on. Come at me, because I’ve learned you get through it. As cliche as it sounds, life moves on, and it feels good not to be overwhelmed with the nostalgia the memories of the past produce. Live and let go. Yes. I wish I would have grasped this concept earlier because it would’ve saved my time and my mental health. That’s okay though, I learned at my own pace, and I think that is why I’m okay with all of this. 

I see how sad you are. It makes me so sad to see you this way, and I’m definitely the cause even though you deny it. You were a big chapter that is my book of life, but it’s time for me to write a new chapter where you’re not the main focus. I’m sorry. Although you cause me so much grief, I always remember the amazing time we had. The walks we took, the food we ate, the video game we played. You were my best friend, but I feel like school was a big reason why we were together. When we’re at different schools is different. We can’t both complain about Mr. Hendrick’s test, or how insane Nass was. No, that sense of commonality was gone. I was seeing myself change, and I knew you didn’t like it. I’m sorry. I’m sorry you’re sad, and you still don’t understand, but I needed to be selfish and make this decision based on my well-being. I still think very highly of you, despite the sadness you make me feel. But I promise you it gets better. I’m sorry I had to be your first love, and I’m sorry it ended this way. We gave it a shot. 

I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING ANYMORE.

Oh, relationships. I’m very happy with the new friendships I have made in PA. Aw, these people are some of the greatest, understanding, craziest, weirdest, people you’ll ever meet, and I think they’re all incredibly rad. Except for maybe like two of them, one of which is my roommate who took the toaster, but like whatever, that’s for another rant. One of them in particular, he is my favourite. He makes me laugh, and gives me space. Time where I can compose myself before I start talking about why I’m upset, and not to get all DJ Khaled on you, but that’s key. AH. It’s quite great, I love acting so silly with him. It brings me so much joy. He just gets me because he’s so understanding. We can just talk about things like it’s not a big deal, which is so nice when you can find someone like that.  I don’t know if he knows I like him that much.  I’m sure he does. I think he’s the person for me, especially in this time in my life, this new exciting chapter in my life. His sense of adventure is refreshing. We want to go everywhere. Thailand, Iceland, South America, everywhere. I’m just fortunate to have met him, and I’m anxious to see where we go.

Thank god he likes parks and rec. 

All these new relationships are just going to bring new memories, and I’m just excited to see what they are. It’s not disappointing at all so far. I’m excited to grow with these people. You know?

And I’m excited to make memories with the people I already adore. It’s all just one big ride, so it’s all going to be great. 

I'm so happy to have kept and made such wonderful friends. I love them all. I hope they all know that, they're all beautiful, and great in their own way.

[killerbean3]

WARNING PLAY DIS SHEET AT HIGHH VALLUMMEEE #toomuchbass #robsaidhewantsbiggerspeakers #dafu #jamming #cruizin #itslateatnight #dealwititneigbors #itsavinetoowithwatershaking #watercanthang

[roxii-boo-blog]

I see you!! Lol 👀👀👀👀 #sillykid #jordan #pleaseexcusehisdirtyshirt #itslateatnight lol