#jack trade

[marauders4evr]

The exact dynamic of my wheelchair-using super'hero' characters:

Ryder: Look at me, kid.

Juniper: Stop calling me that!

Minnie: There we go!

Jack: Minnie, you're not helping.

Minnie: Good.

[keroa]

A few more memories from Strudel Cafe

[marauders4evr]

An excerpt from Reputation, in which Jack tries his best:

"You really wanna fight?" Jack asked, using one hand to wheel his chair while using the other to pull Cattie's chair. "The day I started cleaning this bar, Al put up this punching bag. The first time I got into a fight with one of the customers, he brought me over and told me to punch as hard as I could. So, punch."

Cattie stared at him before complying. The bag swung towards the wall before rushing back towards her. She yelped just as Jack put out his arm, the bag crashing into it, sparing her face. "See?"

"Yeah, I see," she said. "Punching feels good!"

"Wha-? No!" Jack glanced across the room, where a very amused Al was looking on. "Al had me punch this as hard as I could and it swung back with the same momentum and knocked me right out of my wheelchair. It, and he, taught me that if I wanted to fight, I had to be prepared for the blowback. Wait, is that the right word? That doesn't sound like the right word. The point is: consequences."

"Yeah, but you stopped the bag from hitting me," Cattie said, absentmindedly picking at a thread on her hospital gown.

"I-well, I mean, I wasn't going to let a full-sized punching bag hit a pediatric cancer patient, I'm not that much of a supervillain!"

"So, I didn't face any consequences."

"...What?"

"You just taught me that you'll always be there to protect me, if I screw up, which I already knew."

"No!" Jack wailed. "Well, yes, but-Al, help!"

His boss pursed his lips before saying, "Ehh, the metaphor doesn't really work, if she doesn't feel the impact, but you probably shouldn't knock a girl out of her wheelchair."

Over at the counter, Johnson snorted, her eyes sparkling with over half a century of memories. "Ryder knocked me out of my wheelchair multiple times a day."

The ancient man smirked. "And you learned."

---

The last bit is proof of why initially pitching Reputation as a standalone book, separate from the rest of the Abilities Universe, was a terrible idea. Like Juniper and unlike Cattie, I learned.

[marauders4evr]

An excerpt from Reputation:

[Context: In high school, Jack tried to protect Hari from a bigot, and said bigot threw him off the roof. Ten years later, the bigot is an influencer-superhero, Jack is a wheelchair-using supervillain (who cleans Al's bar for a bed in the basement), and Hari is a pediatric oncologist. When the bigot upsets kids with cancer by implying that disabled people can't be superheroes, Jack steals his Super identity, while using medical tape and sheer queer confidence to make his wheelchair fly. The two other characters are Tally, a teleporting teenager, and Vex, one of her partners, who also works at the bar.]

"You caught me," Jack croaked.

"I almost didn't!" Hari screamed, trembling so much that Jack nearly fell again. "I can't believe you thought that you could make your wheelchair fly with two strands of seemingly-infinite medical tape!"

"I can't believe you caught me," Jack said, still unable to raise his voice beyond an awed whisper. "I'm so proud of you. I love you. I-"

He froze, his words sinking in, the volume rising up: "Haha, okay, good to see you! I'm just going to go!"

He pushed himself out of Hari's arms, which was always going to be unfortunate, but was made even more so by the fact that they were still flying.

This time, when Jack started to fall, it was Tally who saved him. She teleported over, seized the front of his shirt, and popped them both to the nearest rooftop. In doing so, she unintentionally pulled him right from his wheelchair, causing Hari to dive after the mobility aid.

Kneeling on the cold service, Jack said, "Thanks, Tally. Um, actually, could you just teleport me right out of this situation?"

"Uh, yeah, sure?"

A millisecond later, Jack found himself kneeling on a familiar floor, Al blinking down at him. "Welcome! And only three hours late for your shift! But, no, seriously, are you okay? Where's your wheelchair?"

Before he could respond, Tally popped in. She gave Vex a kiss, before giving Jack the bad news: "I was going to bring your wheelchair, but Hari's holding onto it. Like, holding it hostage. He said they were a package deal, because you two, 'need to talk about That'."

"Oh my god!" Vex cackled. "Jack, marry this guy!"

"Would if I could," Jack said, accepting Al's help, as he stood up.

Tally popped a little closer, to ensure that he could stand. "So, do you want me to bring him here so that you two can talk, or-?"

"Nope!"

"What about your wheelchair?"

"I don't need my wheelchair!"

"What do you mean you don't need your whee-?" Vex broke off as Jack casually walked across the bar. "Holy shit, do you actually not need your wheelchair?"

"He's an ambulatory wheelchair-user," Al said, warily watching his employee, "but he can only walk for a few feet-and down he goes."

"Do I get the chair?" Tally asked, prompting her girlfriend to shrug.

"Nah," Al decided. "I'm pretty sure Jack thinks that lying in pain on my yet-to-be-cleaned floor is less painful than talking to Hari."

---

I know Jack's pain. Not the 'nearly falling to your death because you wanted to make your wheelchair fly with medical tape and queer confidence' part, the-come to think of it, I envy Jack's pain.

[marauders4evr]

An excerpt from Reputation (that also crosses over with characters from The Antagonists / The Defectives, because of course it does):

"Do you remember what I said, moments before I used medical tape to swing my wheelchair off the hospital roof?" Jack asked. "I do, since memory is my superability and all. I said, verbatim, 'Cattie, Lucy, don't you ever try this at home.'"

"Yeah, I remember," Cattie huffed. "I told you that I didn't have a home 'cause my foster parents abandoned me at the hospital."

"And then I told you to not try it at the hospital. And what did you do? You tried wheeling off the roof of the goddamn hospital!"

Cattie helplessly glanced at the other adults in the room, all of whom were sympathetic, neither of whom were going to stop Jack's righteous rant. It was up to her to try: "Yeah, but, that was your fault."

"Oh, no, I already went through my guilt-ridden existential crisis. Now, it's your turn. Well, don't have an existential crisis, 0/10 recommend, but at least realize that falling off roofs is a Bad Thing."

"Yeah, you've mentioned that," said one wheelchair-user to another, "but, like, you also mentioned that you wanted to be someone with a disability and a superability. So do I. If you can wheel your chair off of rooftops, then why can't I? And don't say 'cause I'm weaker than you!"

It was Jack's turn to seek help from the others. Unfortunately, Hari didn't seem to know what to say, nor did Al. Surprisingly, the one who wheeled forward was Ryder, his raspy voice only adding to the pain of his words: "You are weaker than him."

"Ryder!" Juniper said. "Cattie, you're not...weaker, you're..."

"Defective?" Ryder suggested, causing Juniper to sigh.

"Jack is jacked," Minnie said, affectionately bumping her wheelchair into Cattie's. "He can accommodate himself by using his upper-body strength to swing his wheelchair through the city. If you want to be a superhero, you're going to have to find your own accommodations."

Jack gave Minnie an appreciative smile, knowing that she had said the right thing, even before Cattie's face lit up. "My own accommodations! But how will I know what those are?"

"Well, when I was your age," said Juniper slyly, "I had a mentor who showed me how to be a disabled superhero."

All eyes turned to Jack. He instinctively started to protest, wondering how they could all assume the best of him, when he had only ever been the worst. Then, he took in Al's encouraging nod, then Hari's loving smile, then Cattie's trembling jaw. It was this that prompted Jack to relent: "Of course, I'll be your mentor, sweetie. If I'm allowed—I think I'm still legally a supervillain."

"I think I'm still legally a supervillain," Minnie said with a shrug.

Jack's retort was cut off as Cattie squeezed every last inch of air out of his queer crippled body. Thus, it was a moment before he had filled his lungs to the capacity whereupon he could shout: "But if you ever fly without my help, again, I will throw you off the roof, myself!"

"Oh, yeah." Ryder grinned. "You're definitely a mentor."

---

Yeah, he is!

[marauders4evr]

So, I was thinking about Reputation—the book that I'm working on, which is part of my 'Abilities Universe', AKA: a bunch of people with disabilities and superabilities fuck around and find out.

The general synopsis is that Jack is a queer, wheelchair-using, Super with an eidetic memory. Back in high school, when he was trying to defend his crush, Jack was paralyzed by a bigoted bully; said bully naturally became a superhero. Now in his late twenties, Jack has been labeled a 'supervillain'. After a series of plot beats, the bigot causes a group of kids at the local hospital to believe that they could never be superheroes, so Jack steals the bigot's Super identity to cheer them up. Things escalate extremely quickly with a bunch of threads and characters twisting together, as Jack helps everyone in his life and vice versa, it's a Found Family, and it's beautiful. And, of course, just when everything's going well in his life, the hammer falls.

Throughout the story, it's going to be repeatedly reinforced that Jack has PTSD and subsequent depression as his superability forces him to relive his worst memories. And there's a scene that I can see so clearly where, after a traumatizing moment, he just completely breaks down. And there's a scene right after that, which is one of the most cathartic things I'll ever write. But for months, I've been trying to think of that thread that connects those two scenes, essentially trying to think of who can help Jack's overcome this trauma. It's been a difficult choice because there are about a dozen new characters in this story. Then I'm crossing over with other characters, like Juniper and Ryder from The Defectives Trilogy and Jason and co. from One Day. All of them are great characters who have unique dynamics with Jack, but none of them feel like the right person to help him through this breakdown. The character he really needs is...and then it hit me:

"Who the hell told you that you couldn't be a superhero?"

Jack's body trembled with a combination of sobs and muscle spasms; he nevertheless tried to be polite: "Sorry, can I help you?"

"Nah, you've helped enough people." The woman wheeled forward, reaching through the bars. "That said, I can help you."

Shaking his head, he muttered, "You can't help me."

"Don't tell me what I can't do." She smiled. "Look, I'm a psychologist."

Jack tried to hold back the memories of every unhelpful therapist he had ever had, every suggestion that paralysis was mind over matter, every use of The Smile and The Voice. Her voice wasn't like that:

"Did I mention I'm a wheelchair-user who wants to be a superhero and is frequently treated like my mere presence is antagonizing?"

"Um, no, you didn't mention that," Jack slowly said. "Next time, lead with that. I'm sorry, what was your name?"

"Minerva Banks-Flamel, but you can call me Minnie."

-

Now Minnie has a purpose for being in the book other than me unabashedly wanting to insert a scene wherein Minnie, Jack, Cattie (one of the kids at the hospital to whom Jack becomes a surrogate brother), Juniper, and Ryder all fly with their wheelchairs.

[marauders4evr]

An excerpt from Reputation, in which I remind you all that I (a disabled writer) am writing disabled characters, not morals:

[Context: Jack, 28, wheelchair-user, 'supervillain', was paralyzed by his bully-turned-'superhero', steals said bully's identity to help kids at the hospital, is in love with his former classmate, Dr. Hari Harsh, and is a surrogate brother to Cattie.]

"Your boyfriend's mad at me," Cattie spat.

Jack paused in the doorway of the hospital room, eventually wheeling in. "Yeah, well, he's mad at me, too. You're not special."

She snorted. "I told him how I wished my foster parents had cancer."

"Oh, he is having a night," Jack said, his mouth quivering, as he skidded his palms against his wheels. "How'd he respond?"

"'I can't deal with this right now,'" mimicked the teenager. "Then he had Rhonda take my vitals. What's his problem?"

"We just got into a huge argument, because I thought Metal Butt—the superhero who paralyzed me—had paralyzed himself."

She stared at him before saying, "That would have been hilarious!"

"It would have been hilarious, right?!" Jack exclaimed, unabashedly seeking validation from the fourteen-year-old.

"He would have deserved it."

"No, no, Hari made it pretty clear that disabilities and illnesses should never be seen as punishments."

"The nondisabled doctor made that clear, huh?"

Jack pressed his lips together, unwilling to admit that his response had been near-identical. "I think he's right about this one, Cat."

"Oh, please, you're so in love with him, you'd say he was right, if he said you could walk."

"I'm an ambulatory wheelchair-user, so he would be right," Jack said, before admitting, "He's also right about this...kinda."

She perked up at that. "'Kinda?'"

"It is wrong about to think that someone 'deserves' to be disabled."

"But?" Cattie eagerly prompted.

"But, god, I wish that, for once in his privileged life, that bigoted bully would have personally experienced the consequences of his actions."

She took over the singular brain cell: "Because why is it always us?"

"Why is it never them?"

"Why do we have to go through this, while they're going on vacation?"

"And living in their gigantic mansions?"

"And not having to worry about how to pay for their organs?"

"And not having to worry about being bullied; hell, being the bullies."

Cattie wiped her eyes before saying, "And they're out there, thinking, 'My life is great, I'm so glad I'm not like those poor sick cripples.'"

"So, why can't we think—" Jack started, only for Cattie to harmonize: "'I wish they were like us.'"

"I wish they were." Curling up, as much as one could in a hospital bed, Cattie said, "And I don't care if Hari's mad at me. What's he gonna do, give me even more cancer?"

Jack burst out laughing. "Nah, he wouldn't use that as a punishment; he wouldn't think that is a punishment!"

She clung onto the gallows humor tighter than her stuffed fish: "'You know how we can get Hari to understand what we're going through?"

"We're not paralyzing my boyfriend!"

"Jeez, fine, we'll just give him cancer!" She smirked as he tried to protest through his wheezes. "It would be a teachable moment! He would be an inspiration! He could help the hospital get more money by posing in those commercials with the violins; okay, I'm done."

---

As am I.

[marauders4evr]

So the plan is to have Jack be an 'antihero' in Reputation, not with the typical 'I'm an edgy murderer but it's okay because I have shaky morals' trope, but more like...well...like this:

Jack did what every wheelchair-user should do at 2:00 AM: he used his medical tape dispensers to suspend his chair from the bar ceiling. He didn't have to wait long before the back door opened; the new customer tiptoed in with a lockpick in hand.

"Aw, I miss being able to tiptoe," Jack lamented.

The other man screamed and instinctively threw the lockpick. Jack watched it hit the wall before offering some advice: "Lockpicks are more useful as melee weapons than range weapons." On that note, he quickly slashed the two strands of medical tape, causing his chair to crash down to the floor. "Welcome back to Al's Ales."

"I-I was just-" The intruder struggled to get a breath in. "I-"

"Whoa, hey, don't panic. Look at me. Better yet, let's find five things in this room that we can look at." Jack spent the next few minutes helping the intruder through his panic attack, eventually deeming him grounded enough to converse: "I'm not going to turn you in. I'm a supervillain and, trust me, I know what you're going through. Not that you're a villain, I just mean that you're not the only one who has to steal to get by. I get it. Hell, I once robbed this place. After I got out of jail, Al became my sponsor. He hired me to be his janitor. He even lets me sleep in the basement. He's a good guy. Pays for our bartender's estrogen. Drives her home when it's raining. Hides the fact that I'm committing identity fraud. Steal from someone else, okay?"

"Oka-wait, what was that last part?"

Waving his hand, Jack impatiently said, "I stole the superhero identity of a bigoted bastard to help a group of kids at the hospital. Speaking of, you should donate some of the money you steal, to their charity. Pay it forward, you know? Anyway, let me show you how to break into this bigot's mansion..."

---

Did I say 'antihero'? I meant 'superhero'.