A/N: This is my first time writing Jax fluff. I have nothing but shame and regret. Hug the bnuuy.
This is partly about Jaxy and partly Jaxy x Y/N (or at least how he acts with my OC after they get closer, eheheheh…), so I tagged it as x reader as well.
CW: none | couldn’t help sneaking the teeniest bit of angst in there BUT HE'S FINE SHHH
Word count: 729 | Masterlist
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Sleeps curled up, with his ears tucked down
When he’s sleeping, he curls up on his side, knees pulled up, arms folded close, and his ears naturally droop down over his face. It’s a weirdly small and vulnerable position, like his body is bracing for something even in sleep.
His eyes light up when you laugh at his jokes
He pretends like your reaction doesn’t matter, but if you genuinely laugh at one of his dumb jokes, his eyes actually brighten and he gets this smug little smile like he just won the lottery. He’ll pretend to shrug it off, but that moment stays with him all day.
Pretends he doesn’t like physical affection but secretly melts
If someone ever casually ruffles his ears or leans against him, he’ll roll his eyes and act like it’s the most annoying thing in the world. But the second they stop? He suddenly finds himself lingering near them, making excuses to keep them close. He denies this need even to himself.
Gets sleepy when you play with his ears
Following the previous one: If somehow you ever get the chance to pet him or play with his ears while he’s lying down or curled up nearby, he’ll act annoyed and look around if someone else is there. If he sees you two are alone, he starts visibly melting. He leans into it, eyes half-lidded, basically purring to you to continue.
Will stick to someone’s side he trusts without a word
It’s hard for him to actually get attached, but if he genuinely likes someone, he’ll become more relaxed near them. No teasing, no pushing buttons (maybe just a little, he has a reputation to uphold after all), just existing in the same space.
If you sit on the couch, he sits next to you. If you need to pair up for an adventure, he stands next to you without saying anything. If he senses danger, his first instinct is to look your way. If he feels like you’re upset, he tries to distract you with stupid jokes until he sees a smile. It’s the closest he gets to admitting he feels safe around someone.
Carries things for you without saying a word
If you’re holding something heavy or look tired, he just… takes it from you. No snark, no jokey comment. He walks off like it was nothing, pretending it’s not a big deal – but if you thank him, he gets all fidgety and brushes it off with a “yeah yeah, don’t make it weird.”
Talks big but gets flustered easily
He’s an unbearable tease, but if someone genuinely flirts back at him? His brain shuts down and goes into panic mode. The second he realises someone is playing his own game against him, he either doubles down in an almost desperate attempt to stay in control (he usually ends up failing spectacularly), or completely shuts up for once.
Hoarder of small trinkets
If something catches his eye, he keeps it. Random objects, buttons, small toys, a weirdly shaped rock – he doesn’t even realise he does it, but his pockets are always full of little things he’s picked up from adventures. If he ever gives someone something from his collection, it means something.
Bonus: Sometimes he leaves you random gifts near your door or sneaks something into your pocket. No note, no context. Could be something useful, could be just a funny-looking rock. He never admits it was from him, but it always ends up being something you actually like.
Watches you while you talk, totally focused
If you enter the room or just talk to someone else when he’s around, he loses interest in whatever he was doing before. He’d look at you from the corner of his eyes every so often, ears tilted your way. He doesn’t say a word, just carefully listens. If you look over suddenly, he pretends he wasn’t.
Acts like he doesn’t remember things, but he does
He pretends to forget little things people say or do, but he remembers it all. He knows everyone’s favourite foods from their past lives, the memories they remember, what makes them laugh, what they’re afraid of. He just never brings it up because admitting he cares, even in the smallest way, is terrifying for him. He thinks of it as getting attached – something he swore to never do again.
CW: mention of SA, PTSD, emotional repression, self-worth issues
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Tugs on his gloves when he’s nervous
He doesn’t fidget in obvious ways, but if he’s stressed or anxious, he’ll subtly tug at the fingers of his gloves. The worse he feels, the tighter he pulls.
Sometimes his voice gets quiet when he talks about himself
He can be loud and obnoxious all day long, but the second he starts talking about something real – his past, his feelings, even just personal opinions – his voice drops. Not in an obvious way, but just enough that you can tell he’s not used to being listened to.
Hates the idea of being needed
I feel like deep down he actually wants people to like him, to want him around (he achieves the exact opposite with his actions because he's too much of a pussy coward to let anyone get close) BUT the second he feels like someone needs him, he panics. He doesn’t trust himself to be dependable. He doesn’t trust himself at all. And the thought of failing someone? It’s unbearable.
Absolutely cannot handle someone crying
If someone starts crying in front of him, his first instinct is to joke about it. Not because he thinks it’s funny, but because he panics. He has no idea how to comfort people, and deep down, it makes him feel sick because he knows he’s the type of person who makes people cry.
Hates silence
If it gets too quiet, he starts feeling awkward. That’s why he always has to be talking, pranking, teasing, joking or anything that gets the conversation going. Sometimes he would just tap his foot or drum his fingers against his leg. The silence is too... empty.
He doesn’t like being ignored
Not in the haha, I’m an attention-seeker way, but in a deeper, more painful way. If someone he secretly cares about starts avoiding him or just excludes him from the conversation, it absolutely wrecks him. He won’t show it, but inside, it feels like he’s disappearing. (Imagine what he felt when the others didn’t invite him to Kaufmo’s funeral…)
Doesn’t like being touched unexpectedly
If someone touches him out of nowhere (especially if he wasn’t paying attention) his whole body tenses up like he’s expecting something bad to happen (I can very much see him having PTSD from something SA related I’m so sorry…..). He covers it up with a joke or a smug comment, but the stiffness in his shoulders remains for a very long time, before he’s able to calm himself down.
He's also not used to physical touch as a way of showing love/affection (he can't even remember the last time someone hugged him – if that ever even happened in the circus).
Breaks alone
Jax never cries in front of people – he’d rather die first. But when he’s alone in his room, with no one to see, it’s different. He’ll sit on the edge of his bed, staring at the floor, fists clenched so tight his fingers ache. He tells himself he’s fine, that it doesn’t matter, that it’s just another day in this stupid circus. But the lump in his throat doesn’t go away. Neither does the stinging in his eyes. And when it finally gets too much, when the weight of everything presses down on him just right, he’ll let out one shaky breath, then another, and another, until he finally breaks.
Quietly. Always quietly.
Because even when no one’s watching, he still hates looking weak.