#jay lore

[aroacesafeplaceforall]

LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THIS COFFEE!!!! ITS LIKE MY WHOLE HAND

[sleepy-stims]

Me stimboard!

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[ohemgeeejay]

Honestly shout out to my auntie who is a full time painter and stoner with 6 dogs and a fully paid mortgage

She’s literally living the dream

[thejaycorn]

So, I'm building out stories for future projects and that generally means I spend a lot of time thinking up a bunch of things that range from sad to creepy to disturbing; and so I started thinking about AI and spam bots sort of act like the old stories of fae creatures trying and failing to completely mimic the behavior of humans in order to lure us into devious and malicious contracts, or steal our very identities.

Anyway, the internet is a digital fAI-w1lde, the Artificial Arrwyn, the shadowy and dark woods in our cautionary tales but made of 1s and 0s - be careful children lest you stray from the safe search engines, lest you be lost forever.

Pleasant dreams, everyone.

[whatthefuckisasweep]

i love personifying my fandoms as exes like

rvb to me is my lovely housewife who loves me no matter what. shes really good at making me laugh and i can always come home to her. she doesn't judge me and i could go years without seeing her but we always hit it off and we're no less worse for wear.

janda is like that realllllly pretty girl that you're supposed to stay away from but shes just like. really really really cool and how could you say no? she's always coaxing you to do stuff and making u forget where and who you are . and shes also got a screw loose but that makes it a little more fun so you keep seeing her

IT was like an ambigious friends to lovers situation but we never defined it and now we realized we're better off as friends. shes really sweet though and i still go to her for advice on emotional issues.

assassins creed was like. she was THERE for me she was a rebound to be sure but she was HOT and she took all my attention, and we parted ways when it was needed with no strings attached.

homestuck broke up with me because she felt it lose its spark and knew it was going to be unhealthy but i wasn't ready yet. but now i think my old self was a little cringe for holding on.

[orphicpoet]

This is going to be a long very personal post.

Last year, at this time I was with my best friend in North Dakota. A wedding and a month visit became me staying there until August. And really considering moving. I ended a relationship that wasn't going anywhere, and I discovered that I was very much in love with someone. I felt myself. I came back home to Chicago and couldn't wait to go back. And I did. Things didn't go as smooth this time around. A new relationship started off with baggage. My newfound happiness came with anxiety about me not deserving it or losing it. I left a week before Christmas, with a therapy session already booked in Chicago, with my mind made up I was going back to ND in May.

On Christmas my father almost died. I sat in the hospital, crying because my whole family was crying. But I was mad. I had nothing good to say or look back at. I felt guilty. Because I thought him passing would eventually mean my family would be free from his bullshit. But he was a miracle. And all of January was hospital visits and me going to therapy.

In therapy I realized how much trauma I had and how all of it came from him. So much pain came with my eyes opening. And I couldn't express it to him. I couldn't yell at him or talk to him. I had to begin the healing journey.

I was ghosted and I couldn't even process it. Every week felt like I was picking myself up, picking up the pieces. Looking at my inner child and trying to love him. Trying to love myself.

I know I'm not healed. I'm still on that process. But I am not the same person, the same man I was. I wish I was in ND, I wish things were working out better for me in a lot of ways. But I truly feel hopeful for myself. I deserve good things. I deserve respect. I'm not a bad person. I don't have to redeem myself. My father was wrong. The people who hurt me are wrong.

[sleepy-stims]

Cupid's400 day 7: Favorite animal

Rabbit, crow, and blue jay stimboard!

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[sleepy-stims]

Cupid's400 day 13: Favorite foods/drinks

My favorite foods stimboard!

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