Oct 14, 2013
have you ever had that boy that made your heart skip a beat? ♡
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have you ever had that boy that made your heart skip a beat? ♡
idk thought of it lang
because this song made me think of the craziest scenario.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJ-ibFCPyLw
diba may banquet sila jay. tapos bawal magdala ng outsider. tapos kunwari nasa napakarandom na place ako like the park or kahit sa bahay or kaya sa school tapos bigla nalang siyang dadating na nakatux tapos magugulat ako tas tatanungin ko kung bakit di siya nasa banquet nila and he'd be like, i want to spend this night with the person i love <3 skhjfskhjf tapos mag lalabas siya ng stereo or maybe an ipod tapos magpplay yung song na yan tapos sasayaw kami ayshet. kinikilig ako sa idea HAHAHAHAHA
He didn't want to bother me raw. Mas okay naman na text ka ng text kaysa di ka lang man nagtext kasi at least alam kong naiisip mko. Sarap kasi ng feeling pag di mko naiisip e -.-
I wanna be happy with you. I wanna be unhappy with you. I just wanna be with you. :')
052713 (Tagalog post)
OKAY NA SANA EH. PERO PINAGMUKHA MKONG TANGA. :( TAPOS TINATANONG MO PA KANINA KUNG ANO MALI. EH NABABADTRIP KA NANAMAN EH. :| :( NAKAKAAFFECT DIN KASI NG MOOD PAGIGING BADTRIP MO. IDK KASI AYOKONG BADTRIP KA. KAYA NABABADTRIP DIN AKO. TAPOS SABI MO PA KANINA, SASAMA KA SA CLASS NI ATE IENA AND ATE MEG THEN YOU LEFT EARLY. PARANG WTF. :| :( DAHIL BADTRIP KA, GANUN NALANG. NAKAKAINIS LANG KASI GUSTO KONG NAGWOWORKSHOP TAYONG DALAWA. HINDI YUNG IKAW LANG. OR AKO LANG. TAYO. PERO HINDI MO SIGURO YUN GETS. ANG CLINGY NITO PAKINGGAN PERO GUSTO KO KASI LAGI TAYONG MAGKASAMA. ALAM KONG IMPOSIBLE KASI WE NEED TIME APART PERO SCHOOL'S NEAR AND WE'LL BARELY SEE EACH OTHER CAUSE OF OUR CONFLICTING SCHEDULES. AND IDK. IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK. :( SORRY HA. I JUST WANNA SPEND EVERY MOMENT WT YOU HABANG DI PA TAYO BUSY. BUT YEAH. YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO WALK OUT KANINA. TAPOS NUNG SINIGAW KO YUNG PANGALAN MO DAHIL MEDYO ANG LAYO MO, DI KA PA LUMINGON. NAGMUKHA AKONG TANGA NUN, ALAM MO BA YUN? KAYA DI NA KITA HINABOL. ANG SAKIT. PINIPIGILAN KONG UMIYAK NUN PERO DI KO NA KINAYA KAYA PAGPASOK KO AD'LAINE, PUNONG PUNO NA NG LUHA MATA KO, BUTI NALANG, NANDUN SI KRIZZA AT KEANU. AT NUNG HINUG KO SI KRIZZA, DUN NA UNANG PUMATAK LUHA KO. EWAN KO. PERO SOBRANG SAKIT NA RIN EH. DI MO NAMAN KASI KINAILANGAN MAGWALK OUT. PWEDE NAMAN KASI NATING PAG-USAPAN. HINDI NAMAN KASI LAHAT NG BAGAY, NADADAAN SA PAG WWALK OUT. NADADAAN YUN SA MASINSINANG PAGUUSAP. PERO HINDI EH. HINDI MO YUN GINUSTONG GAWIN KAYA PINABAYAAN KITA. KAYA NGAYON, DI KO NA MUNA SINASAGOT MGA TAWAG AT TEXT MO. SIGURO KASI, AYAW PA KITANG KAUSAP DAHIL SOBRANG ANG SAKIT NUNG NANGYARI AT DAHIL GINUSTO MONG MANGYARI YUN E. IKAW YUNG HINDI TUMIGIL NUNG TINAWAG KITA. OO, NUNG UNA, SINASABI KO, WALANG MALI PERO KUNG KILALA MO NAMAN KASI AKO, SASABIHIN KO PARIN YUN DAHIL ALAM MO NAMANG DI KITA MATIIS. SO NGAYON, DI KA NAGPAPARAMDAM AND BAKA OKAY LANG KASI KAILANGAN DIN NATIN NG SPACE. EWAN KO KUNG KAILAN ULIT TAYO MAGUUSAP BUT I HOPE IT'S SOON. KASI SA TOTOO LANG, DI KO KAYANG DI KA PANSININ, HIRAP NA HIRAP NA NGA AKO KANINA NA HINDI KA PANSININ E. PERO KUNG DI PARIN TAYO MAGUUSAP NGAYON GABI, I HOPE YOU'RE SAFE AND HAPPY WHERE YOU ARE RIGHT NOW. I REALLY DO. I LOVE YOU <3
Message to you. (052713)
Hi baby. :) You probably won't be able to read this but it's okay, I guess. haha because I probably won't have the courage to tell this to you anyway. so yeah, here it goes.
It's been approximately 4 and a half years since I first liked you. It's actually a funny story, how it happened. You had this thing for my best friend and I don't think she liked you back that time, so you settled for me - your second, maybe third (if you include her twin) choice - but I didn't mind because I was pretty much too happy about the fact that someone actually liked me.
You courted me and I said yes last September 15, 2008 but we broke up a month and 6 days later because turns out, you still liked my best friend and I was really hurt back then because I really liked you and I couldn't believe my first "relationship" would end that way.
49 days later, I found out that you and my best friend were already in a relationship and i was bitter. bitter about you, about her, about the fact that i was your second choice, about everything. I couldn't stand seeing you guys, I couldn't stand it all.
A few months later, you guys broke up and I was happy about it and it probably was because I wanted you back. I didn't want you with anybody else. I wanted you with me but it didn't happen because by then, I was gonna enter high school and we would end up in different schools so it wouldn't have worked out.
It was in the middle of SY 2009-2010 when we started talking again. You added me on facebook and I could still remember your profile picture back then and how you were teasing me about my profile picture. It was also the time when you told me that you had a crush on your batch mate, CJ. You told me that you really liked her and it secretly hurt because I still liked you but I just ignored that feeling because I was with RK that time and you weren't supposed to affect my feelings.
2nd year, we started going out. You wanted to court me that time and I told you to ask permission from my friends, Princess and Jean, first. I was surprised that you did. They told me you were serious because of that but I really didn't feel like being in a relationship that time so I talked to you about it. Luckily, we compromised and it was okay with you and we continued living our lives like nothing ever happened.
I was a junior when you started dating Zaini, and I must admit that I was hella jealous because I saw in you what I haven't seen in you before. We talked a lot and you told me that you liked her a lot. You really were in love with her and it was a good thing of course but it still stung a little and I didn't tell you because it wouldn't matter anyway AND i had a crush on my batchmate that time.
We used to talk a lot but I think Zaini got mad or smthn so we stopped. I didn't mind though, because I was busy with schoolwork and my mind was preoccupied all the time until... we started talking again but I was a senior already and you and Zaini had your first break up. (i think)
I remembered you told me that you and Zaini had already broken up and by that time, I didn't care anymore because I'd already moved on but things changed when you went to our house for the first time.
I remember that school was cancelled because there was a storm but you came anyway. I couldn't stop the butterflies back then because I felt special. I mean, you made me feel special. Then we took photos<3 and people started asking questions.
I don't really remember what happened after that, but I think we didn't mind them. you were like "Fuck the haters bruh" haha. and that somehow made me feel better about everything then things went well after that, we video chatted most of the time, and you also helped me with my project which was cool and then I started falling for you again.
We stopped talking again after that because you and Zaini got back together. We saw each other at NBS and that was the first time in months that we talked again. I asked you about Zaini and you told me you guys were okay but I think I told you some negative shit that time. sorry. idr.
Idk what happened. Idek how I knew I was right about the song you made for me before you even told me but that didn't matter...
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So now, here we are. together again. :') Hi, Jason Patrick Cantuba Yodong. I hope you don't read this today or smthn lol. nakakahiya. :( but yeah. Babe, I'm so grateful and thankful about everything. You make me so happy, babe. Even though we fight a lot and we argue most of the time, I will ALWAYS fight for you, fight for us because you're worth it, Jason. Our relationship is worth it. I hope you never think of yourself as worthless because you aren't. You're worth than gold & more than anything else in this world, babe. I'm sorry, if I've ever made you feel that way before or if I've made you feel insecure because I talk too much and end up talking about other people. I'm sorry, I really am. I don't intentionally do it babe, it just happens and I'm really really really sorry. i'm sorry for all the times i've made you feel bad about yourself and for calling you a jerk back then. I'm sorry for being jealous about everything and everyone. I'm sorry for constantly wanting your attention. I'm sorry for wasting your time doing silly things. I'm sorry you spend a lot cause of me. I'm sorry. but I hope you understand and accept me for me. I love you so much babe. I love every little thing you do and every little detail about you. and I hope, this relationship will last because I'm really in love with you babe. Ikaw na eh. Ikaw nalang gusto ko makasama buong buhay ko. :')
so here's to going through fights, having the time of our lives and making so much more memories with each other. :')
P.S. i hope you end up being my forever because I would really want that. <3
052613
This past week has been rough. Jason and I almost always fought about the stupidest things and it sucks, really. I hate it when we fight. I hate it when I feel bad after our fights. I just hate all of it. But i'm seriously thankful that I have him. I really am. I know we may fight about a lot of stuff but it's okay because fighting is part of being in a relationship and perhaps, fighting will make our relationship stronger.
I don't know what contentment feels like but i'm pretty sure you've already made me feel that.