Tags/Warnings: Rylesha & ARC Trooper Echo, Rylesha & CT-1409, Rylesha & Captain Rex, Rylesha & CT-7567, Rylesha & Master Even Piell, dreams, night terrors, prophetic dreams, use of sedatives, grief, loss of loved ones, dark imagery, vague descriptions of canon injuries, canon compliant, no beta we die like men
( I'm new to tagging my writing so I'm happy to learn!)
Rylesha (my OC) wanted to answer this herself, so here goes my first real attempt at writing a... ficlet, I guess? Be kind and enjoy!
My sleep had been blissfully deep and dreamless since my medic gave me the sedative. Thank the Force for that man and his ability to deal with me with a level head and an iron fist. Without sedation my days had blurred together into a haze of grief and breakdowns the likes of which I'd never experienced.
My Master was gone, killed during his escape from the Citadel. I'd felt it as soon as it had happened and knew he had joined the Force again. My only answer for why I hadn't felt the next loss was that I was so consumed with the first that it hadn't registered at all. Or so I'd thought.
Captain Rex and ARC Trooper Fives had told me of the loss of Echo -- my vod and one of my closest friends in the galaxy. My thoughts kept returning to why I hadn't sensed it. Why hadn't I felt him join the Force? Between the waves of crushing grief I felt something keep bringing me back to that thought.
The dreams were worse than all of it, though.
Inky blackness always seemed to surround me, hiding everything from view. A voice called my name, but it was faint. So far away I doubted I'd truly heard it at all.
More than once I found myself waking to the sound of panicked screams and a metal door slamming shut. It felt too real, too close. My racing heart and labored breathing sending me into a panic that would last until my medic would inevitably sedate me again.
Not my finest or most dignified hour.
~*~*~*~*~
The dreams had eventually faded away and I returned to my duties without incident, but occasionally my thoughts drifted back to them again. I'd shake the reminder from my thoughts and carry on, because I wasn't sure what else to do.
A night came where that same inky haze drifted at the edges of my dreams again and I listened. I waited.
I heard my name being called again from far away, but this time I searched for its source. I ran until there was nowhere left and found myself before a metal door. A glass porthole at its center frosted over with ice. I knew a crude cyrochamber when I saw one and felt fear tangle itself like vines in my chest.
I couldn't see anything in the chamber, but I could hear something from within its frigid recess.
CT-1409, CT-1409, CT-1409...
My breath caught in my chest and I couldn't believe what I'd heard.
"E-Echo?" I dared to ask and the repetition ceased.
"Ry? No. You aren't real." he spoke lowly, his voice like gravel and he sounded so tired it made my chest ache bitterly.
"I am real, Echo. Tell me where you are! Let me help you!"
"You can't help me now. Just go. Before they take you too."
I wanted to ask what he meant, but a door slammed behind me just as the repetition of his CT number began again.
I was pulled away from the chamber. Not by Echo. The Force. I was dropped back into my own body and mind unceremoniously and the shock of the feeling sent me toppling from my bed and onto the cold durasteel floor.
I scrambled for the private comm Rex had given me after we'd lost Echo.
"Just in case..." He'd told me quietly, but the meaning wasn't at all lost on me.
In case I needed to talk. In case I needed a friend. Just... in case.
I pressed the button and watched as its light flashed while it connected. I tried with all I had to steady my breathing and my heart that felt like it might jump from my body and run for it at any moment, but it was no use.
"General? It's late. Is everything okay?"
I could hear the concern in his voice, as evident as the fear in mine was no doubt about to be.
"No, Captain. I need you to listen to me. I know what I'm about to say is going to sound completely insane, but I need you to trust me. Can you do that?"
It only took a moment for him to agree and then I let everything I saw and heard spill out of me. He was silent as he listened and when I finished that same silence took over.
"If you find any intel that may lead to Echo I need to you to chase it. I need you to promise me this, Rex." I told him and tried to put any amount of strength I had into those words.
"I will, Rylesha. I promise."
I thanked him and let myself fall back against the side of the bed with a heaving sigh. I'd done what the Force asked and relayed the message to one of the only people I trusted enough to follow through on his promise.
All I could do from that point was trust and wait.
Thank you so much for reading! Please be kind as this is the very first of my writing I'm sharing with the Tumblr-verse!
Tagging: @crosshairs-dumb-pimp-gf and @just-here-with-my-thoughts (because I'm sure you'll be interested lol)
If you'd like to be tagged in the future, please let me know!
Rating: R. We are going dark places here today.
And then very, very soft places.
Summary: After getting attacked out of the blue, your usually so stoic Mandalorian loses all composure as he fears for your survival.
A/N: This was a request that I really loved and I enjoyed writing this a lot. I tried my best to get in all the feelings, so you're in for a rollercoaster.
Warnings: Blood, bit of gore(?), panic, anxiety, near death experience, violence, tooth rotting - sweetness
“Something isn’t right.”
You wouldn’t have to have said it.
The second Din turned to look at you he knew.
Your sweet and soft smile had turned to the collected and sinister look that you had when you went to hunt with him. Calculating, cold and this time…there was that small crease between your eyebrows. Worry. Maybe even Fear.
Din didn’t think a woman like you would fear anything. But there you were, next to him looking scared.
It physically hurt him. Like a Mudhorn had rammed him in the gut. Immediately, his face mirrored yours underneath the helmet.
He didn’t want you to feel scared. Ever. Not around him.
Another immediate reaction was his motions, that he followed through automatically.
His right hand wandered to his holster, a deep breath in, squaring his broad shoulders, quickly scanning the area.
Nothing.
Calm.
No weapons. Thermal scan…nothing.
A crying Rodian kid on the corner. Nothing. Empty.
He relaxed. Only slightly. Ever so slightly, before turning to you again.
Taking a step towards you he had realized that you had come closer as well, nearly pressed up against his beskar armor and thus he stumbled into you, his hand automatically reaching to hold you.
You didn’t mind the closeness. Not at all.
Quite the contrary, you seemed as if you wanted to crawl underneath the armor with him.
He’d never quite seen you like that. You were mostly a stoic yourself, he supposed it was normal. Most Jedi he had met had shown similar behavior, although you had become more and more open with him during your months together.
Now you were actively seeking contact and he found himself enjoying that. It flustered him - but in a way that he very much enjoyed.
You looked beautiful today.
You always did, but even more so today. Basking in the sun, wearing a silken beige dress, your hair worn open. He loved it when your hair fell freely over your wonderful soft shoulders, down the curve of your breasts and-
He concentrated, looking up again.
The market was…quiet.
It was Nevarro…what was supposed to happen? Since Cara had cleaned the place out, it was too comfortable and safe if anything.
Slow rustling, all kinds of species. All kinds of soft flowers and spices and fabrics and food stored in the middle of the street in brightly painted vending trucks. Kids running through the alley, laughing away happily.
It was simply put - nice.
No wonder you decided against taking your saber out today. After he had assured you, that this was the first really safe place you visited after weeks of danger, you had dressed comfortably and let your hair flow a bit.
Grogu now leaned out of his newly built hovering pram, his little hands grasping the edge, staring out with his big brown eyes.
Mando smiled softly at him.
Not that the kid could ever see, but somehow the Mandalorian was sure that he noticed none the less.
You were upset enough. No need to get the kid scared too.
He couldn’t calm him however. Those big eyes were trained on his Master and his ears quickly lowered in worry as he seemingly noticed your state.
Din still held you tightly, his hand resting on your hip. As long as you didn’t complain he surely wouldn’t give up on the touch. You were usually so careful to stay at a professional distance - it was a rare occurrence to be able to touch you, he wouldn’t let that opportunity slip.
He noticed you pressing up even more against him. Backing up into him, your back now nearly flushed against his metal clad chest.
He felt the need to comfort you.
“I scanned the place. No fire weapons. All is fine.”, he spoke, slowly.
You were so close a whisper would do - but he tried to speak in a normal tone, tried to assure you you were safe.
A Devaronian suddenly stood before you, glaring down at the three of you and you excused yourself from standing in the middle of the road.
With a soft sigh you moved to the left, then gestured for the Mandolorian behind you to do the same.
No need to have that conversation all out in the open.
Mando tilted his head, unhappy with your departing form.
Whatever had triggered the sudden fear in you, it was persistent.
You turned your head up to look over your shoulder, right into his Visor.
“It’s a tingle. Something is wrong…we shouldn’t be here.”, you insisted.
Your face was so close. That Din couldn’t think about much more than that in that very moment.
Yet there was still that worry on your
features.
“Look around. We’re in Navarro. Things are fine. I have friends here. It’s midday. The people move slowly. All is good, Jedi.”, he tried again. Voice calm, deep and sedative.
You sighted.
You could see all that yourself. But the force did not lie to you. You felt it shivering through you. It was wild, stirred, as if screaming at you to leave. To run while you could.
Anxiety washed over you in waves.
Your heart began hammering, your pupils diluting slightly, your breath becoming erratic….your stomach hurt.
Noticing that your panic only seemed to increase, he decided to be a bit more direct.
“Lady Jedi….my Jedi…”, Mando spoke suddenly. It was with a deep sigh that his touch then graced your skin.
His hand traveled from your hip to your shoulder. Both hands resting on your shoulders now, turning you in his grasp to look at him.
Standing an arms length apart, he softly tilted his head.
He watched you for a little while.
Your hands ever so slightly forming fists, your whole stance tense, your chest moving in a fast and uneasy rhythm that he wasn’t at all used to from you.
Cyar’ika…my love, my darling jedi, his mind wandered at the sight before him.
“Have I ever not protected you? Calm down. All is well.”, he tried again.
Your eyes searched for his. The sinister crease on your forehead slowly merging into a worried frown.
“Have my abilities ever failed us?”, you asked in return.
He sighted, a by now very known, modulated slow sigh.
No. They never have. You’d always been right in some way.
“What do you expect us to do?”, he asked.
He knew he lost this quarrel. He always would.
If you set your mind on something in that stubborn pretty head of yours, you would go through with it - and he could never bring himself to deny you.
“You do remember you wanted to come here to get supplies before we leave?”, he reminded you, nudging his helmet forward.
He was right.
You exhaled shakily, turning your head away from his pretty visor.
Since when had you begun thinking of his helmet as pretty? Have you been standing this close the whole time?
Your gaze traveled slowly. From His helmet over his strong arms. His hands were warm as he held you, even through the leather. Before his broad beskar frame you did feel safe….at least in a way.
Still, the force was uneven. Restless around you.
You grit your teeth together. A pressed sigh escaped you as you nodded slowly.
“You are right…still…finish the shopping list and let me take the kid and head back to the ship, or to Cara, or Greef alright? What do you say? No trouble in that. Maybe I just…caught a fever. Who knows.”, you suggested to him, looking straight into where you always supposed his eyes were.
You knew he wouldn’t deny you. For whatever reason, the broad strong Mandalorian before you had a soft spot for you and your judgment.
Maybe because of your teacher-position to his Foundling, only the Maker knew.
“Yeah…You know what. That’s okay. You go lay down please. Get some rest. Drink something. Maybe it’s the sun. It’s hot today.”, he approved, nodding softly.
His hands fell from your shoulders and you smiled. Softly.
You turned to your left, bowing down ever so slightly. Grogu’s eyes widened in surprised joy, squealing in happiness as you lifted him out of his little crib.
Holding the child close, you couldn’t help but to smile softly.
Mando threw you a surprised look.
As surprised as a helmet could look at you.
You didn’t answer him, just pressed the Kid against your chest and smirked playfully.
“You could leave him with me.”, he proposed.
“No. Don’t feel like it.”, you answered.
“You could just leave him in the hovering pram.”, Din gestured.
You shrugged, your lips pursed inquisitively.
Grogu turned his head to his father also, his little mouth still turned to a toothy smile.
“You start to like him.”, he challenged, humor evident in his tone.
Maker you looked lovely with his foundling pressed up against you. So motherly, so womanly. Gorgeous.
“I always liked him. He’s my little Student.”, you mocked, turning your head to nuzzle the
kids face, “my teeny tiny Padawan.”
How I wish that were me. Little lucky womb rat you. - the Mandalorian before you puzzled, before nodding.
Grogu squealed, looking straight at him. Once again giving the man the feeling that the little one could read his mind.
Mando chuckled softly before shaking his head and turning around.
Throwing one last look over his shoulder to watch after you two filled his usually so guarded heart with a pleasant warmth.
Wizard. What a beautiful thing you were.
With his happily squealing Foundling in your arms.
Your light dress was long enough to nearly graze the ground, yet elegantly clung to the curves on your body.
Your lovely wonderful body that often rested so beautifully on the seat in his cockpit, or stood so strongly next to him when you covered him on the field.
He was truly blessed to have you close. Even though you would probably never be more to him than his foundlings teacher, it was sweet serenity to have you nearby for those last few months. He had enjoyed every minute of it. Still did. Always would.
Your thoughts haven’t been that sweet, as you wandered through the small crowd on the street.
Your heart still wasn’t any calmer. Your body still slightly tense.
There had to be something to keep you from being so anxious. It wasn't normal and you did not enjoy it in the slightest. So you started whispering to the kid.
“Come on Grogu. You feel it too, do you not? Danger looming. Something is off. Your Buir can’t convince me otherwise and still - excuse me - He does calm me a bit…”, you were interrupted as a large hand got hold of your shoulder.
“Oh no no no, pretty thing.”
The voice sent shivers down your spine. Dark and deep and…with mal intentions.
The Force seemed to shudder around it.
The danger, whatever it turned out to be, had been closer than you planned for it to be.
“Excuse me.”, it spoke again.
Your mind raced. So did your heart. It would be smarter not to turn around. The child was pressed to your front.
You wouldn’t want him between the stranger and you, so you turned your head.
Giving the man that had a hold on you a sly glance over your shoulder.
It was the Devaronian, that you had made space for earlier.
Tall. Tall. And very broad. Strong. Too strong for even you.
Thinking fast, you assessed the situation.
You weren’t armed.
You had counted on the Mandalorian not leaving your side.
And for there to be no trouble on a friendly planet like Nevarro.
You could force push him. Then run for it. Devaronian’s had a reputation to be slower than humans.
Maybe there was no trouble at all.
Oh but there was. You knew there was. Think. Think.
“A shame. Could’ve sold you. I like Twi’leks better…but I’d make a damn sweet exception for you.”, he rasped on.
You glared. Still unsure on how to handle it. Mind tricks could work. Maybe. It was your best chance.
Priority number one was to protect the little Padawan in your arms.
“Oh you wouldn’t want me. You’ll let me go.”
Your voice was sweet as honey as you spoke. Your hand gesturing a small circle as you tried to force your wish onto his desires.
“No. Not here for you. I’m here for the Quarry.”, he grinned, his hand tightening on your shoulder, painfully.
You jerked. The pain was horrid. The man was at least twice your size and his hand damn near broke your shoulder into splinters with a light squeeze.
And then it happened. Too fast. Way too fast.
But Jedi reflexes were a curious thing. And seemingly something the Devaronian did not know about.
No wonder Mando did not find anything as he had scanned the place.
A Devaronian was in no need for a blaster.
And as he had forcefully pushed you around, it had been a simple knife that was aimed for the child.
The force spoke to you. Moved through you and you pushed Grogu aside, pressing him to your left instead.
A simple knife that was, thanks to your reflexes, now stuck to the hilt underneath your ribs.
You could feel it.
Plunged deep inside you.
Your breath hitched. Eyes wide.
Under your ribs up to…did he puncture your lungs? Your heart
had stopped beating.
Out of shock? Yes
Breathe. You can breathe. Lungs are fine.
Stomach isn’t.
Rib isn’t.
Your mind raced.
He held you close. You could feel his breath on your cheek as he spoke through gritted teeth.
“Damn Mando’s. Thought they were smart. But here that idiot is. Leaving his little Lady to carry a quarry that the empire pays so very much for. “
It didn’t hurt.
Not at first.
The pain didn’t immediately shoot through you.
In this very second the air stood still. The people had stopped moving and there was only you, the force and the child, safely tucked into your other arm.
He had aimed for Grogu. Clearly only needed him dead.
Idiot. The Empire wouldn’t want him dead.
Don’t think about that now. Not now.
Your heart stood near still as you breathed slowly.
Concentrating on your training. On gathering yourself. On staying calm.
Now came the pain. There it was. Loud and nearly unbearable.
You saw stars and only the low squeal to your left brought you pack to your senses. Enough to move enough to…
“Oh…”, you whispered.
Slowly lifting your head from the bloody mess that was your stomach.
When he looked into your pained and glaring eyes, he saw only amber brimming in them.
Trust in the force. And if the force was a little bit dark in you today? So be it.
“I’m far from a ‘little Lady”, you now hissed through gritted teeth.
There it was again. Priority Number one.
Protect the Padawan.
In an instant your own small hand had gotten hold of the knife's handle, forcefully pulling it back, ripping it out from underneath your flesh.
You couldn’t stop the low cry that escaped you as you did, but there was something holding you up.
Oh the force. Strong. Strong through you. Flowing through your veins. Holding you up.
You had never felt it that way. Not so…not like this. Powerful, steady and…Angry. So Angry. Hateful even. Your eyes glowing in a fiery amber you stared at your reflection in the bloodied knife, close to losing consciousness.
“And nobody touches my Padawan.”, you noticed yourself threaten now.
As if it was the force that spoke through you. Not yourself at all.
Your senses returned.
Clarity returned.
Protect the Padawan.
In a swift motion you swung the knife, plunging it deep into the Devaronians chest.
A damn shame you were to small to reach his throat.
It wouldn’t stop him for long.
But it made him stumble in shock.
Long enough for you to gather all strength you had left to stand upright, focus and -
You pushed.
Not physically.
But through the force.
Stronger than you probably had ever before.
You saw the Man before you kicked off his feet.
The invisible force pushed him further away until he hit the next possible brick wall, a good few feet to your side. That damn race was near indestructible but the house definitely looked like it took some sweet damage.
The loud thud echoed through the street immediately , making heads turn and the air stand still for a moment.
The rustling stopped, the voices stopped, Kids stopped in their play.
And then you took your chance.
A deep breath, holding Grogu close, trying to stay upright.
You couldn’t run. Not after being injured that much.
So you did the best thing you could do.
“MANDO.”
It was a horrid scream really.
Desperate. Mortal agony sounding terrifyingly frail as your usually so serene and calm voice broke away mid word, ripping through the absolute silence - like the knife that had ripped through your flesh.
And before you had time to do any more, you felt strong hands on you.
Protect the Padawan.
“Nasty Bitch.”, the Devaronian hissed. The Pain in his voice filled you with a ping of pride, just until he threw you like a ragdoll through the street.
You didn’t remember much.
Hit your head. Hard. On the gravel.
Rolling on the ground. Holding Grogu close and tight, keeping the damage off of him.
Skin ripped open by the gravel.
You had come to a stop laying flat on the ground, faced down.
Felt gravel on your forehead as you tried your best to push yourself up to all fours.
Blood on the ground, blood on your hand. Blood on your head, running into your eye.
Moaning in pain.
Maker the pain.
Your hitched breath.
That impact had
taken the air straight from your lungs. Your stomach was bleeding like crazy.
Poor kid. Had to witness that.
“Protect the Padawan. “
This time you’d whispered it to yourself. A reminder. An agenda.
Carefully you’d let go of Grogu, setting him unto the ground beneath you.
His squeal tortured you. Hurt more than the wounds.
“I’m sorry. I’m fine don’t you worry about me.”, you muttered, tasting blood in your mouth as you did.
You had made it onto all fours. Looking down at the small child beneath you.
All you saw was blurry.
But he seemed fine. He was fine.
Seemingly you caught all the damage.
You did good.
You smiled. A small and frail smile. But proud.
Protect the Padawan.
Danger is still present.
You pushed yourself up.
No.
That didn’t work.
Your muscles gave in immediately and you slumped back down again.
Maker your head. The world seemed to spin around you, your head thrumming with the worst migraine you ever had.
Your breath was shallow now.
You were losing blood. Fast….and your head, your damn head.
Protect the…
You tried again. Tried at least to look forward,
There he was.
Big and broody. Coming straight for you again.
You must’ve looked horrid.
Head bloody, dress soaked in red, skin ripped open, dust covered.
You twisted to the Side, pushing the curious child back behind you.
Don’t let him get near the Child. Protect the Child. Protect…
You tried to look up at the huge figure before you. To glare at him as he rolled his shoulder back, his teeth gritted, hand balling into a fist.
You breathed hard. Trying to breathe at all.
If that fist hit your head then that ugly Devaronian would be the last thing you saw.
The desire to turn away flooded through you.
The last thing you wanted to see…maybe the sky…the child?
No you couldn’t look at the child.
You couldn’t have the child watch as yet another of it’s Master got killed right in front of it.
And before any of that could happen. Before anything touched you.
There was a flash of shiny and perfect silver.
A breath of air.
A familiar Visor.
And finally, darkness overcame you.
The first thing you noticed as you regained consciousness was the pain.
Dull.
But…manageable?
A hand reached to your head.
Your thrumming and horrid head. The head was still bad. Still Horrid. Your vision still blurry.
And…different. Lost one eye? Or just patched up?
You moaned softly, doing your best to push yourself up and have a look around.
You spotted Cara. Sitting at the back of a dimly lit room. Her usual look, sitting wide legged. It was a bit blurry to see but she did have streaks of blood or mud on her face. You guessed the former.
You were glad to see her.
A bit Anxious not to see the Mandalorian, but he was most likely taking care of…
“Is the child safe?”, you quickly asked, voice so hoarse you had to try a second time.
Cara watched you for a while. Then she sighted and simply nodded.
“You..shouldn’t be up yet. But it’s good to see you toughing it out, Lady.”, she threw you a small reassuring smile.
Why didn’t she get up?
Why didn’t she come over?
She just sat there. Kind of weary, kind of tense. Hands folded between her legs, looking not at you, but past you.
Feeling stiff but mostly alright, the memories came back to you. Slowly.
You still wore the same dress. The now brown stain of blood covered nearly the whole stomach and chest area. The fabric was cut open.
Carefully you drifted your hand over your stomach. The wound was completely closed.
“I see the child put it’s hands on me…or did anyone else magically develop healing powers?”, you asked, lifting a brow.
Anyone else....someone else quickly flooded your senses.
“Is the Mandalorian alright?”, you quickly followed up.
Cara tried not to chuckle.
You could sense through the force that she was in a sorry state though. She was extremely weary. Just very…aware.
What else did you feel?
Your connection to the force seemed unstable. It ached. Like a bad bruise.
Or a strained muscle...
You had definitely overworked yourself by throwing that Devaronian.
Speaking of - what had become of the beast?
Even for Din, Cara and some help he must’ve been hard to put down.
You reached out again. Slowly and carefully. Not over doing it.
There was something…dark.
Known. But Dark. All dark side really. Anger and Hatred and Selfhatred and Fear and Attachment.
Force…you had been pretty lost there for a moment.
But it was for your Padawan. It was to protect, right?
You wouldn’t just turn because of some minor situation like that, right?
You’re eyes still had their perfectly natural hue, no amber glow…right?
You needed to know.
And since there was no mirror in sight, someone needed to tell you.
“Cara…come over here please…”, you asked of her, holding a beckoning hand out as you placed your other on your aching head.
Palm pressed against your forehead, head hanging slightly low.
“Sorry Lady…I can’t.”, she answered.
Her voice seemingly had found her strength again.
She sounded much better now that she knew that you were alright.
And you were. It wasn’t that bad really.
You didn’t even get shot. In the end it was a knife to the stomach - which was completely healed already, thanks to your resourceful little Padawan, and a grand roll-around in some gravel- which had most likely ended in a concussion, but nothing too bad.
“You…can’t?”, you asked, pushing your aching head up to look at her once again.
She leaned back, arms crossed, trying to give you a small smile.
It was a sad excuse for a smile really. She looked terribly tired out.
“Nope.”, she answered again, with the same smile.
You frowned, your confusion quickly turned to worry.
“Did you get hurt?”, you quickly asked, true and honest worry in your words.
Cara yet again, denied: “No i’m fine really. Apart from some bruises.”
“Bruises…”, you whispered, frown on your face, confusion written all over your features, “Did you get into a fight with that Devaronian? How bad is it?”
Cara leaned even further back, shaking her head.
“Nope. Devaronian didn’t hit me. Didn’t get the chance.”, she shrugged, with a small sigh.
You stared blankly at her.
Now you were just lost. What in the
stars was going on.
“Dank Farrik Dune, just please, tell me what’s going on?”, you begged, eyes gazing longingly at her.
You had just noticed that you adapted your Mandalorian's speech patterns there, and cursed yourself for it.
Too many questions and way to little answers from that woman. Actually - she had posed more questions for you than she had answered!
She sighted, once again, shaking her head.
“I can’t come closer, or over to you - because he won’t let me.”, she finally explained.
Great. Another riddle.
“Who. Cara.”, you pushed her, this time actually angry. This constant guessing was hurting your already dying head.
She didn’t answer.
Just held her hands up as in retreat, nudging her head towards…you?
No, not you. Behind you.
You hadn’t even thought about turning your head. Having been happy enough to see any soul sitting and waiting for you to wake up, you hadn’t expected another.
But carefully turning your head, looking way beyond your shoulder, you saw him sitting at the bedside.
Watching. No Guarding.
The first reaction you felt was a weight that was lifted off your aching chest.
How good to see him in one shiny piece.
Your brows furrowed and your gaze softened.
“How is Grogu?”, you asked, your voice filled with compassion and worry.
A tense silence settled.
Mando took his time.
At first he didn’t even seem to have heard you.
He sat in the darkest corner of the room. Leaned over himself, his elbows resting just above his knees as he looked at the ground.
The weight was put right back on your chest.
He wasn’t alright. Not at all.
“Mandolorian. What happened…?”, panic settled in.
Gone was the calm demeanor of your Jedi self and you felt dark swirls of the force once again swirling around you.
Attachment, worry, fear. Fear. Fear.
Cara already told you the kid was fine.
“Where is my Pada-”
“Kid’s asleep he’s…whacked but unharmed. Snoozing away. Don’t…it’s…fine.”, he finally answered, seemingly out of pity for your anxious state.
It worked however. And your shoulders sank as you calmed down, breathing slower.
“Oh so you can talk again, huh big guy?”, Cara challenged from across the room.
You threw her a questioning look.
She sounded Angry with him.
Mando didn’t move an inch.
He had sounded….horrible. Pained. Worked up. Shaky.
“Why…what….why isn’t he letting you come to me, what…?”, you tried to gather your thoughts, gesturing between him and her before shaking your head in confusion.
“Oh why won’t you tell her Mando?”, Cara spoke a big louder again, there was some hidden anger in her words.
Maybe not all too hidden.
Mando yet again, stoically stared at the ground, unmoving.
“What is going on.”, you finally stated, completely out of it.
“How long have i been under? Why are you bruised, why are you deadly quiet, Answers, now or I’ll get angry.”, you threatened, pointing first at her than at him, raising your voice ever so slightly.
Ever so slightly was still a lot for a usually stoic Jedi and made the Mandalorian to your side jerk.
“Well short version…our dear Mando mauled a man in the middle of my streets. Took me and two men to get him off the bastard. Not that he didn’t deserve it.
He then waited for a Medic to put you back together and guarded your side like a kriffing Rancor ever since!
But he can probably tell you in more detail.”, she now sighed, huffing as she got up.
“Now that I know he’s back to his senses and that the killing spree’s over with, i’ll leave you to it. But if anything happens, scream. I’ll be in here in a sec.”, Cara threw both you and the man to your right a warning glare, then a small smile before she shook her head and left the room.
The door resounded loudly as it was pulled close behind here.
Then the silence settled.
You sat still.
Suddenly just as still and quiet as the man next to you.
Shock flooding your system.
What was he thinking?
You didn’t even dare to imagine.
Turning your head for the first time completely, you watched him.
Sticky blood covered his beskar.
It stuck to his helmet, his pauldrons, his leather
gloves were soaked in it.
He sat still however.
Hunched over and ever so silent.
And there was only one question on your mind.
“Are you okay?”
Part II - A Mandalorian's Viewpoint
In a book on Mandalorian culture, one that you had stored safely away it the Razor Crest, stood a nice little passage that Din Djarin hadn’t read that many night ago, when sleep did not come to him.
It had struck the man in his inner most core.
And the words had rang again and again as he sat there, having guarded your bedside.
“In direct opposition to their infamy as a ruthless enemy, Mandalorians cherish family and shower affection upon those they love and care for.
After all, ‘To protect and defend oneself along with one’s family’ is on of the Resol’nare. The Six tenets that defined what it truly meant to be a Mandalorian. Any who wished to be considered as such, was expected to abide by them.”
Din of course knew of these things.
They had been taught to him, repeated over and over since he had been saved by the people that he now called his own.
On this day however, he held them dearer to his heart than usual.
Near meditative in his state. Repeating them to himself. Trying to find reason and meaning in what exactly had occurred.
In what he had done.
He was a mess, really.
Loads of feelings and thoughts and reminders of his ideologies brushing through his troubled mind.
As he sat. Still. Next to you.
If he’d tried to bring them into order. The biggest standout would be Anger.
Anger towards you.
Anger towards himself.
Hatred towards the bounty-hunter that had dared to touch his family.
He was angry at you.
Why he didn’t quite know. Maybe because you put yourself into danger. Because you put yourself between yourself and his foundling. And therein lay the conclusion.
He couldn’t be angry at you.
You endangered yourself - to protect his family.
You did not give in and lay low - again, to protect his foundling, your student from harm.
You went out there unarmed - yes, because he had promised you his protection.
You strayed from him - yes…because he let you.
Conclusion found.
It was his fault. His and his alone.
He should’ve listened to you.
He should have been with you. Should have stayed closer.
Damn the kriffing market or the supplies - he would never, never again let you leave. Not even slightly stray. He couldn’t.
He couldn’t.
He….couldn’t even look at you.
There you lay. Nearly ripped to pieces in front of him.
It was pure luck and skill on your part that you were alive.
He’d failed you. And the child. Completely.
Maker he hated himself for it.
In the last hours he’d wanted nothing more than to rip the helmet off his head and throw it away forever.
He wasn’t worth the Beskar.
He wasn’t worthy of being a Mandalorian.
He was a coward, a failure.
He was worse than…than…anyone really.
What could he even do?
He’d didn’t just let you get hurt. You nearly got killed. Came so close to it.
And he…He’d just lost it.
Din looked down at the ground beneath him.
A small puddle of blood gathered beneath his feet, on the stony ground of the darkened room. It seemed black in the bit of light that trickled through the drawn curtains.
He had drawn them close himself.
You had nearly had your skull cracked open. He could only imagine that you wouldn’t enjoy the bright afternoon sun when you woke up.
If you woke up.
His hands clenched into fists again, his whole body tensed.
Playing the memory over and over again.
The second that his heart had stopped beating.
He was so sure that he’d lost you right then and there.
It was his absolute worst nightmare come true to see you…see you - he couldn’t.
The images kept crawling into his head and he could neither stop them nor endure them.
Just as he could not stop himself from hitting the Devaronian again and again and again until he saw the Beskar plate on his hand stuck in nothing but red mush as three people forcefully pulled him from the corpse.
He hadn’t lost himself like that in…maybe never.
He used to be like it. A long time ago. Rougher. Cruel even. But never this.
Never like today.
It was fueled by fear and Anxiety and loss and Sadness and hatred. So much Anger flowing through him.
Nobody got to even touch you or the child. Seeing you laying on the gravel ground, completely still, your own blood engulfing you made him…what did it make him?
Unhinged? Possessed?’
He didn’t know.
To be quite honest he didn’t really remember much.
He wanted to marry you. He loved you.
To build a future with you. To life like he had always dreamed of.
With a clan and a destiny of his own and that man had taken it all from him.
His ambitions, his dreams, his hopes.
All gone in one, horrid scream that still made his hair stand up and his stomach turn in a way that nearly got him to choke.
So he remembered that.
Your scream.
Your blood curdling and horrified scream for help.
Mando.
It would have been the last of your words.
And if
he had found you and the child dead after his rampage, if he would have been too late - he knew that it would have been the last thing he heard as well.
He would’ve rather died an honorable warrior's death with his own knife plunged right beneath bis beskar, than to live with the shame of having his family killed right before him.
Dark. Dark thoughts.
Dark thought was all he had had in these last hours.
It was dark thoughts that made him run towards you and the child. Dark thoughts that brought him to maim and murder the man that had hurt the two of you with his bare hands.
Dark thoughts and dark places.
But yet again he reminded himself of his tenet.
To clear himself of the guild of it all.
“To protect one’s family.”
The foundling was his family.
And you…you were supposed to be his family.
One day.
He wished for nothing more than to call the two of you his.
Then to have the Child decide against a Master and stay with you. Than you to stay with him.
To speak the vows that would bind you.
So what else was he supposed to do?
He had gone a bit far. That was certain.
He had fought off Cara and the boys when they tried to haul him back, off that dreaded corpse. He had not spoken a word after it all.
Couldn’t bring himself to.
Not until he knew you would wake. Not until he knew you would be fine.
If both of you would’ve died, his decision would have been made for him.
But Grogu was fine. He was well.
How you did so good in protecting him, he did not know.
He only knew his love for you was absolute.
You were strong, striking and a Mandalorian at heart. You had put your life up for a foundling.
And he knew he would never love another. Never. Not when he had known you. Noone would ever rival you. And if he had lost you…
A groan escaped him, his hands reaching for his helmet.
His muscles tense.
His whole body ached and yet the pain was nowhere near to what you must feel. To what you endured.
To see that monster put it’s hands on you. You looked so small. So fragile in that moment.
Fragile was a curse word in Mando’a. But you weren’t fragile in a sense of being weak. You were beautifully fragile around him, because you allowed him to be your armor.
And he hadn’t been there.
And then you had woken up.
Only hours after it all had happened.
Only hours after he had kneeled on the street, holding you in his arms, pressing your near lifeless body against his as he again and again tried to wake you. Pressing his helmet up against your forehead, whispering to you as tears streamed down his cheeks, as your blood soaked his clothing.
It was the first time after Karga had nearly lost his arm, that he was truly glad for his foundlings healing abilities.
Maker knows if you had survived that stomach wound without the little one.
He couldn’t bring himself to look at you.
He only saw his failure. Din didn’t even know if he could ever look at you again.
To see the Medics rush in and handle you like a lifeless doll on that table made him dizzy.
He remembered needing to crash into a wall to hold him up.
He never had a problem with blood.
Never with gore or with anything. He had cut of limbs and Heads and what he had done to the Devaronian had been far worse and still.
The sight of you weakened him.
You.
Cara had tried to usher him into the next room, or to hold the child and just move away but he couldn’t.
He took his exhausted little Kid in his hands and finally turned away to breathe.
His helmet resting against the far wall.
Cara didn’t need to see his face to have known in what immense pain Din had been. She could basically watch him being eaten alive.
But here you were. Alive and well.
Worrying for the child's safety still and for his.
And after all you had been through.
You had asked him, him of all people:
“Are you okay?”
It made him tense up.
Salty tears running down his cheeks and burning in his eyes as he held his helmet in his hands once again. He was a failure. An absolute and utter failure.
He should be the strong one. He should be in control, he should be there for you.
Din concentrated. He knew he was strong, he knew he could do this.
All his life he had trained to be not just a murderous weapon but Strong. It was the Way.
Breathe. For her.
You had questions. Start there.
“How long have i been under? Why are you bruised, why are you deadly quiet, Answers, now or I’ll get angry” - you had said.
So he answered.
“I…you were under for….a few hours. Two. I think.”, he muttered.
Even through the Modulator he sounded horrid.
Shaky and like he’d just cried his eyes out.
Well he was in fact, Still crying his eyes out but what gives.
“Cara was bruised because she tried to get me to stop.
I am deadly quiet because…”, he fell silent.
He knew you were watching him.
Felt your inquisitive gaze on him, He felt nothing short of awful.
“Because you deserve this helmet, this armor more than me. Because I feel unworthy.”
He heard your soft sigh.
It felt good to have spoken the truth. Good to have that off his chest.
“Mandalorian…come over here please…”, was all you answered.
Din closed his eyes as he heard your voice.
You sounded better than he thought you would. Much better. Calm again.
Still he couldn’t. He wouldn’t be able to look at you, not in this state not while-
“Please. I beg you.”
Din noticed his hands trembling. Who was he, if he denied you.
Without being able to stop himself he had gotten up.
Your eyes still on him. His eyes as well.
He tried his best to look straight down. At his own, blood smeared and impure armor that didn’t seem so shiny anymore.
It wasn’t far to the bed from where he had sat.
Two uncertain steps and he already felt your hand reaching for his.
He wanted to pull back he needed to pull back but -
Yet again he couldn’t.
Staring down at your hand, that looked so very small as it held his, your thump lovingly brushing over his bloodied gloved knuckles.
You so rarely touched him. This time his enjoyment seemed bittersweet however.
“You’ll get your hands dirty on me.”, he rasped.
Now he just sounded defeated.
Dark, deep voice so very worn out, and sluggish.
“I’m plenty dirty myself.”, you muttered, watching up into his visor, that was still trained on your hands.
He barely noticed that you pulled up the blanket that had covered your lap.
The white fabric suddenly blinded his vision.
“What are you-”
“Hold still…”, you muttered back.
As you finally pulled back, he watched you perform the same act on his breastplate. You were cleaning him up.
You then took the fabric away from him, resting it back on your lap.
It was red and brown from the residue and his vision now slightly better, but more…smudged.
“Why are you cleaning me up.”, there was pure confusion in his voice.
Sad and tired confusion, you now worked to run your hands up his left forearm.
There were bloody marks on your arms and hands were you had met the gravel. It made him flinch to see them.
Every bit of pain you felt, he felt at least tenfold.
“May I?”, you asked tenderly.
“Again, what are you…”
“I take that as a yes.”, you simply interrupted him, carefully taking off his glove.
First the left, then the right.
“Thought so…”, you whispered, as you saw the damage.
Leather or not his knuckles were bleeding badly.
The skin rubbed off painfully, most likely from hitting a broader man repeatedly. But you just guessed that.
One of your hands left his.
You felt up your head, noticing the bandage that was wrapped around it.
“Don’t - Dank ferrik woman!”, you heard him complain as you opened the bandage.
It softly fell from your head and landed on your shoulders, where you quickly detangled it from your head, hair and neck and gathered it in your free hand.
“I’m fine…It’s just a concussion…I probably looked stupid with it around my head anyways.” you explained, a small gentle smile on your lips.
Mando watched in disgrace as you lightly patted blood and skin away, caring so lovingly for his wounds.
Din didn’t understand why you wasted your energy on him.
Yet he couldn’t pull his hand away either.
He wanted you to touch him. He wanted to touch you.
To hold you close.
To
shed the armor, pull you into his grasp and never let any danger come close to you ever again.
“You don’t look at me, Mandalorian.”, you spoke softly. It was an accusation more than it was a observation.
It still made him feel horrible.
Made him feel disgraceful and guilty.
“I can’t.”, he simply answered. Slowly. Modulated voice completely still.
He was so very thankful that the helmet covered the worst of his weakness.
“Do I look that horrid?”, you had asked, sadness filling your voice, “Do I need a helmet from now on? Maybe I’ll get a silver one. We could match.”, you tried to make light. Obviously. But he still heard your voice break slightly.
It was that moment exactly that he had to look up. He had to.
No matter how much pain it would deal him, he had to at least be that respectful.
You cried.
A silent tear rolling down your cheek. Washing away blood and dust. Yet your expression seemed calm otherwise.
You were once again, being so brave for him. So steady.
He couldn’t but reach out to you.
Feeling his own tears yet again welling up behind the helmet.
As his hand touched your cheek, you immediately leaned into him.
His breath stopped there for a second.
“Gar mesh’la.”, he whispered.
Your cheek against his palm, you closed your eyes and he watched you, watched you in utter awe.
Watched you like you were his life , like you were the stars and the moons and the sun and he couldn’t but smile.
For the first time in hours he smiled at that simple gesture.
At the simply touch of his skin against yours, only hours after he had thought to have lost you and the child forever.
You exhaled shakily, opening your eyes again, to look into his visor.
“Speak basic with me, Dear Mandalorian. My head hurts to much to deal with Mando’a at the moment”, you explained softly, a lazy smile on your lips.
He smiled as well. Nodding his head.
“I said you don’t look horrid. Not at all.”, he answered you.
You nodded in return.
Your hand reaching for his, thump running over the scarred back of it. Enjoying the feeling of his skin on yours as you absent mindedly stared at his helmet.
A realization came upon you.
He could see it clearly reflected in your gaze.
And when you spoke the words, it send shivers down his spine.
“You saved my life. Mandalorian. I owe you a life-debt”
The words were muttered. Softly and with a hint of precaution, as your big and lovely eyes innocently looked up into his.
You looked at him as if you had just said yes to a marriage.
Full of expectation and delight and a hint of fear.
And yet…
“A…life-debt?”, Mando asked.
…he didn’t know what to do with that.
He started blabbering soon after, his voice agitated and at loss as he began:
“I…I didn’t save you at all. I was to late. I Failed. I am a failure. You nearly got killed and I-”
You shushed him with a soft shake of your head and a light squeeze of his hand.
“A Life-Debt is a promise. An…An oath. When someone saves your life you declare that you owe them to stand by their side. Knowing your lives can’t easily be disentangled anymore.”, you explained, your eyes still not leaving his.
Din took a shaky breath.
Did it mean what he thought it would mean?
Was this a Jedi-thing?
His heart began racing and his stomach dropped and yet he felt warm and glad and didn’t quite know what to do with any of it.
“I…But you saved Grogu. Also. And it isn’t the first time we save anyone and-”, he tried, but your shaking head yet again brought him to silence.
“It is not the same. With Grogu…yes. But mine and Grogu’s life are already entangled.
I owe you. Mandalorian. Whatever you want whatever you need, only mutter the words. You have saved my life. You didn’t have to but you did.
I have no idea how you took down that beast but you did…whatever it had cost you to channel the energy to do that. I…i just can’t believe it still.
But it is clear that the force wills us together and -”
“Hey…”
It was him this time., that stopped you from rambling.
You were tired. Worn out. And he would not take any advantage of that.
“Lay down for now. Please. Whatever the force wills - I will you to lay low for a while.”, he encouraged you.
You looked at him so differently.
Not at all like he felt. Not at all like he was a failure but as if life had turned around for you. As if he was the Mandalor’ himself.
The way that he usually looked at you.
You still held his hand. Squeezing hard.
He didn’t mind. You could break his hand and he would still be happy about the touch.
“Please.”, he added.
You watched him as he softly put his other hand on your shoulder, guiding your body down onto the soft pillow.
You allowed him too.
“Will you stay with me?"
You had asked so softly. So tenderly.
The words had left your lips before you could stop them. It had been your heart that just poured out of you as you looked at him like that.
You regretted it immediately. You shouldn’t have been that forthcoming. You didn’t want to push him. He had already done enough and yet.
When he moved, you held your breath.
His hand, his rough yet warm hand had carefully made it’s way behind your neck and he leaned in now, pressing his beskar helmet to your forehead in the most tender and soft way that you had ever felt anything against your skin.
You breathed slowly, closing your eyes, drifting into the notion, your hand holding tightly onto his.
When he let you go, after a good minute of staying close, his voice was low and full of fondness.
“Cyar’ika. I will never not stay with you from now on.”
Your heart jumped at that.
Were you still dizzy? Did your head get hurt that much?
You did not now if it was for the best what was unfolding here.
He was your Students Keeper.
Your relationship had always been professional.
You were a Jedi.
You could not get attached. Not to a Mandalorian of all things.
This was not good and this…
He had moved only slightly to get the chair closer to the bed.
Sitting down. Watching you, not letting go of your hand.
…This was good. At least for now. There was no shame in it. No harm. Was there?
“Are you comfortable?”, he asked.
His voice so very low again. So tender and so soft as he spoke to you.
You nodded, brows slightly furrowed.
“Can I…see Grogu. I need to see that he is fine.”, you asked of him, trying to calm your racing heart.
He smiled underneath the helmet.
“He is. You protected him so well, my Jedi. Stood fiercely. I’m sure he’s sleeping…”, he turned his helmet to the side, eyeing the door, “But i can bring him over if you’d feel better then?”
You nodded. Softly.
And that’s how you fell asleep.
With a Mandalorian holding your hand. Your Padawan sleeping, leaned against your side just above our hips, snuggling into you.
Din had left after a good few hours.
He needed to stand for a while. Needed to move his aching body.
Mando did as promised however. Not straying to far. Leaned
against the doorway, still an eye on the two of you.
His heart a bit softer than before.
“How is she?”
He turned to his left. Watching Cara.
There she stood. Glancing inside the room that the man blocked once again.
Just like a kriffing Rancor...
Her arms crossed before her chest, she smiled at the thought.
“She’s tough. She’ll be okay.”, he muttered.
Silently not to wake any of you, “I’m…sorry for being rough on you. You only meant to help. I couldn’t help myself there ...should’ve had myself under control.”
The woman nodded, then smiled, then bumped his shoulder with hers.
“It’s fine Mando.”, she spoke, then her smile fell, “It was horrid to look at. She really stood her ground there.”
He nearly gulped, back to watching you.
“She did. It should never have happened. I should have-”
“Hey. Stop it.”, she warned, her hand on his shoulder now, giving him a friendly tug, “You did good. A little too brutal maybe but good. Asshole is dead. They are fine. All is good. Happy Ending.”
He sighted.
A deep and soulful sigh.
She was right. After everything and all that happened…Cara was right.
He still couldn't quite shake the images yet but...she was right.
A soft and tender silence settled.
The two of them watching the two of you.
“She is beautiful.”, Cara nearly whispered. Leaning against his shoulder, her eyes trained on you.
You.
Still bloody here and there. First bruises turning a soft blue. Hair scattered on the pillow, lips slightly opened, chest rising and falling in a hypnotizing rhythm.
Mando stood perfectly still.
“She is.”, he muttered back. With an unyielding certainty. As if he’d always known.
Cara nodded slightly.
His answer - His tone - His stance had already answered her next question.
She was simply curious if he would be brave enough to answer it as well.
“You love her.”
Her voice was clear. It was already certain.
Still. It needed to be said.
He needed to say it. Only once.
He sighed deeply, his hands before his chest, and let his helmet hang low.
Cara watched him intently. There was a newfound tension in the air.
“Because I saw you holding her out there.”, she continued, giving him the push he needed, “And my Mando’a isn’t good, but i know an ‘I love you’ when I hear it.”
He thought back to that.
To you in his lap. Unconscious. To your soft expression and all the blood.
To his arms around you, his hand holding your head up, his head pressed against yours, rocking your back and forth as he whispered.
No. Nono. Nonono no please. No. Cyar’ika. Stay with me. Please. Don’t. Please stay with me. Cyar’ika my love, my heart stay with me. I-
“I love her. Yes.”
Cara nodded.
Not that she didn’t already know that.
Not that it wasn’t obvious. But it seemed that he himself hadn’t really known it until today. Or that he hadn’t been sure.
Well he was sure now, she thought.
Squeezing his shoulder in solidarity.
Leaving him be. Watching over you.
If you like the story - those here can be read as a part of it!
Mando falling hard for you
Mando having a crush on you
@animefan3223 @shinymoonstarfish @imokayunlessyoumentionendgame @that-girl-named-alex @frau-moon @leeeggggsssssss and of course @beardie-mama
Thank you all!
summary: the princess, Idye Arsen, arrives back from a military mission to find her planet closing to fall in the empire remnants' claws.
warnings: none for now
rating: T
word count: 2.078k
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In a galaxy far, far away...
For many years, the Red twin system was a safe fortress for the rogue, for the powerful and for the weak, for the living and for the dead. No one would dare to cross the borders of the unknown, even less to defy the crown that served as its guardian.
No one but the ones who knew hopelessness for too long, and saw the galaxy reach a dangerous edge, closing to fall in the claws of the empire. When it happened, Neelbruk remained loyal to the separatist alliance, and the king watched the empire foreshadow every corner of the galaxy with unthinkable weapons and immense power, such that no warrior could stop it— long after the mandalorians’ arrival.
Rebelling against the rebels, the frozen planet stood tall without taking up sides until the rise of the New Republic. Hidden behind the red sun, Neelbruk remained firm before the threats of the empire and never bent down except for their own wars.
The house of Arsen did not give in, until the wars of the smoking coals of the empire was made their own.
⋯
Chapter 1: Snowdust
Neelbruk, House of Arsen’s Capitol planet
"Rogue-to-north, this is Harvest jay requesting confirmation for landing."
Above the white sky, dispersed clouds mixed and deflected the red sun's streaks of light through the transparisteel. The fields of frozen water and thick snow covered the landscape up until where the eyes could see as the ship slowed down after dropping from hyperspace. The smooth sound of the engines is cut by a frequential noise that soon merges into a mecanic voice through the comms.
"Harvest Jay, coupling confirmed in Hangar 8-6."
The pilot frowns, unsure on how to respond, "-negative, rogue-to-north, snowdust cargo on-board. Landing requested on Hangar 0-0" His voice fails to hide his concern as he takes his half gloved hands away from the joysticks to flip buttons above his head.
He was used to doing this kind of work. And modesty aside, he did it well. Despite setbacks and the observant gaze of the princess, he kept his mind on the protocols. Keep the princess safe and land the ship.
"What's going on?" Her voice came from behind him, and he turned his head just enough to capture her concerned figure. Her eyes with the same determined yet tired blue gaze from before. The pilot shrugs and shakes his head, still pondering a satisfying answer to give her.
"Harvest jay, requested hangar, is currently occupied by an imperial shuttle. More information to be given on land."
The pilot turns around in a quick motion to share a frightened glance with the princess, who stands with her hand in the pilot's chair. He sees a masked spark of hesitance in her features before she gives him a reassuring nod. Nevertheless, the corner of her lips tug downwards.
"Affirmative, rogue-to-north, Harvest jay to be landing on 8-6." He proceeds to click around the controls and pushes the ship to fly closer to the planet's surface.
The capitol was a huge settlement founded years before the fall of the high republic of durasteel and wood of all kinds. Wikkin was a huddle of starports— more of a stopover for passing travelers rather than a place to call home. The ones who dared to, gave blood and sweat to make the icy planet a little less harmer. The best of their efforts provided the capital city an electromagnetic shield that turned mild the planet’s bruising cold. Either way, there wasn’t much of a choice besides facing whatever surprises the snow storms brought to them.
As the Harvest jay lowered gradually into the ground, a stealthed hangar peaks open gated amid the gelid desert in wait for the royal shuttle that shortened the way crossing the sky over the city’s settlement.
"I have a bad feeling about this." The princess tightens her jaw as she beforehandly gets rid of the copilot’s seat belt.
The ship sways inside the hangar in a silent landing, slightly disturbed by the blizzard that followed along into the platform, wet by melted snow.
"And so do I, your highness.” The pilot, Raas’e, leans forward to finish the ship’s protocols. “...Allow me to shield you down the way."
The princess glances over at him, holding some of her belongings on hand as she focuses on his freckle framed gaze. “I don’t think it’s necessary, but I know you’re doing it anyway though.”
He gives her a mischievous smile, speaking before putting his mandalorian helmet back on. “Glad you know it.”
Workers and high-ranked soldiers look over from their busy work to watch Raas’e with his blue armor descend down the ship’s hatch wielding a rifle, closely followed by the careful steps of the princess. Her black hair was fairly tressed, and it fell tied back to her shoulders over the teal military suit. She cursed under her breath when she felt the contrast within the air of her homeworld against the warmth of Csilla, where she had stayed for no longer than two weeks on mission for the silver command. Messages or aid from the sentinels were not viable due to the essentiality to keep it undercover. Nevertheless, Arsen didn’t think the political situation of her family’s reign would critically change this quickly.
She followed down to the ziggurat’s lobby under Raas’e’s escort where a lilac-skinned twi’lek lady waited to offer a furry cape over her shoulders as soon as she approached.
Raas’e brought the princess up to the steps of the steel walled covert and maybe because of the lack of proper lighting Idye noticed the lack of movement in the halls.
The long foyers turned sharply,complementing the wood flooring that was successful in preserving the warmness as further as they went on the base. Some people transited over the hallways, with the exception of the guards on their posts staring straight ahead.
The way wasn't long to their destination. As he led the way, the sun shone over Raas'e's armor through the windows on the ceiling that provided light in a considerable spacement until a new gate lit up in sight.
Idye holds up a sigh As they enter another hangar, just as the platform they both first came to, but across the lurk. And unlike the previous one there were no ships, only a single airspeeder placed near the departure gate. She watches a mandalorian silhouette take shape as they abandon the darkness of another corridor. Raas’e stands up straightener when he sees the other mandalorian gaze catch on the princess first, and then on him.
The red armored figure speaks up first as they come closer. “I’m glad you made it back safely,” Her voice, clear and fruity, as the only confirmation ever for her to be Sif-Deen states as she greets Arsen with an extended arm. “I expected your output to be… troubled.”
“We managed to flee before the sunrise,” Idye explains, “Raas’e tracked the way back well.” Sif-Deen offers Raas’e an acknowledging nod, which he returns.
Sif-Deen tilts her helmet with a sigh before addressing the princess once again. “Things got heated while you were away. That’s why your return was anticipated.”
Idye frowns in shlight worry, searching for any connections with the constant imperial threat. “The imperial shuttle on the palace.” She realizes.
The mandalorian confirms briefly, visibly with an air of uneasiness, uttermost aware of the whole situation. "That’s where you need to head to, now.”
The princess feels a knot tying in her stomach as her mind soothes itself. “I figured.” She stares at the goggles Sif-Deen hands her before accepting it, and putting them on once she is inside the airspeeder.
Idye knew pretty much what was happening inside the walls of the palace, and that made her mind swing in the possibility of getting herself completely apart of the trouble. But she also knew she couldn't. Although she was able to withstand the conflicts in Csilla —which she classified as a real danger, but knew it would be treated as a minor inconvenience— arriving back to her main responsibilities felt like a weight falling back over her shoulders.
Neelbruk was coming to lose territory to the empire, but not without a fight. Csilla was taken and its habitants trapped under their cruel hand, battles happened everyday and each side just kept getting smaller and weaker. Without any communication other than word spread, Sif-Deen didn't have such information. She herself had little of it. And this, maybe, was the reason she was still alive.
There was nothing the empire wasn’t aware of. The furtive visit of the princess, who barely knew what to do for sure didn’t pass behind them. She felt guilty for not being able to give direction to the army with a proper defense plan; As any leader that cared about their nation, she was provoked as helpless just as her own army. And this was no truly aid.
Idye couldn’t say she had failed, but she also hadn’t made any advances. She had grown amongst the palace and the ziggurat, but at both places she had learnt the same thing— she wouldn’t carry the weight of the crown. She’d carry a blaster and the red west sun in a range. It took enough time for her to accept it, mainly after hearing that since she was a child. But as the time went on, she also learnt the weight she’d carry could be heavier than the one who wore the crown did.
Day after day, she remembered this when she used to train with Sif-Deen. But it could also be easy to forget it.
Sif-Deen pauses for a last moment before leaving the hangar to face the drive, lifting her gaze to address the soldier that had been guarding the princess. “Raas’e Hath, you’ve done great work. You will soon be addressed to a new task. Once the main conflict is resolved, of course.”
“Of course.” His answer is immediate, accompanied by a nod.
As the speeder soars through the fields of snow, the princess replays on her head the only scenes she was able to catch on Csilla. Soldiers of the silver command battling against waves and waves of stormtroopers. Little children protecting their even smaller siblings behind a rock. Peregrines begging the heavens kneeled amidst blaster shots. She had dreamed of the scenery twice since she left the battlefield, but she couldn't help it. To watch was her only choice.
Those dreams only reinforced the suspicion that, if the new republic didn’t make any efforts to claim jurisdiction over Neebruk's sector, despite the sporadic patrols, someone would.
“Idye,” Sif-Deen looks away from the endless white to stare at her, cutting her thoughts off, “You seem worried.”
“I am. Csilla was collapsing before my eyes.” Arsen huffs, avoiding Sif-Deen’s gaze as she responds, “I don’t… want to be at war with the empire.”
The mandalorian exhales, after clicking around the controls. “The fact is, kid, that we’ve been at war with the empire long before you came to existence.”
One more thing Idye was used to hearing about back and forth; the battles, the jedi, the night of a thousand tears, the clones, the death star and just everything else. But yet while enjoying the freedom all of these sacrifices provided, people were still enthralled. Nothing of that had ended. It haunted her the way they told it like it was a long gone past when it was right behind them.
“We don’t decide if we want it. We have to find our part in this battle, before it finds a part for us we don’t want to play.” Sif-Deen’s dark visor meets Idye’s gaze and the princess seems to silently disagree with her statement, but out of the respect she has towards Sif-Deen, she says nothing about it. “You know that, don’t you?”
A brief moment later the princess' answer comes. “Yes.”
Ice fields dominate the landscape threatening with its burning wind the tiny plantations that grew timidly under the greenhouses, scattered eventually behind black rockery slopes the closer they reached to the city.
As a stop for the dispodent, the capital was pretty much a huddle of hangars, workshops, commercial centers, and hostages. It wasn’t a necessarily long road, until the view made it known. Despite its beauty, it didn’t have much to offer for its permanent residents.
Humans and non-humans had their motives to stray away, or to stay.
Idye Arsen struggled on finding motives for her own.
Chapter Rating: Just assume they’re all E at this point.
Warning: Swearing. Threats of violence. Mentions of death/dying. Mention of war. Drugging. Snark. Angst. (I mean seriously if you know me you know angst is gonna happen)
A/N: Here is the next chapter. If you haven’t read Hypnotic this story isn’t going to make much sense to you. If you have read Hypnotic, welcome back! I hope you’re ready to be sad lol. Anyway, enjoy and let me know if I missed any tags!
Once Obi-Wan navigated the ship into space, he set the coordinates towards the last known location of Zara. He sat back and let himself explore the force. Neither of them had needed to work on a connection through distance, so he wasn’t sure if that was the reason he couldn’t feel her.
“How long is it going to take until we get there?”
Obi-Wan sighed and opened one eye, giving Anakin a glare.
“Don’t start that.”
“I was just wondering. I guess I need to work on connecting more with the force. It’s been a while.”
“You know, you could do that all silently.”
“Are you ever not grumpy?”
“Around you? No.”
Anakin sat back and crossed his arms over his chest, glaring back.
“We’re going to need to work together if we want to get Zara back.”
“Is she on the ship?”
“What? No?”
“Then we don’t need to work together right now. Why she puts up with you, I will never fully understand.”
“I’m her best friend.”
“Again. Not understanding any of it.”
“You must live a lonely life without any friends.”
Obi-Wan opened both eyes and glared at the younger man.
“I have Zara. Plus, I’ve seen what a friendship with you can do. She may have been composed by the time we got to Naboo, but she was anything but before then.”
Anakin frowned and sighed. Other than the short conversation on the docks, Zara refused to speak on their time in Mustafar.
“I didn’t.. I don’t.. I never meant to hurt her.”
“Yet you did anyway. And now you’re on your way to the very man that twisted you into the monster she remembers you as.”
“I won’t let that happen again.”
“You are so sure of yourself.”
Anakin sat forward and put his forearms on his knees.
“You think I’ll fall again.”
“Yes.”
“Then help me. You thrive from the dark side, yet it doesn’t consume you. How?”
“Years of practice. Which is something we don’t have.”
“Stars, Veth, just help me! I know you have no use for me, but I am here to help Zara.”
“You’re right, Vader, I have no use for you.”
Anakin winced and sat back, recoiling like Obi-Wan had struck him. He had abandoned the name the moment he woke up from the forced sleep Zara put him in. It wasn’t a word he wanted to hear, and he wasn’t even sure how Obi-Wan knew it. When the older man sighed, Anakin looked at him intently.
“First thing, stop calling me Veth. I don’t go by that name anymore and you know it. You toss it around like it’s an insult when you know exactly how much that hurts.”
“Okay. I’m.. I’m sorry.”
“Good. Now. You aren’t going to be able to control the darkness in you. Not as well as I do. Not yet. However, you can work on letting it in without fear. That is what you need to do as often as possible.”
“Uh, how do I do that?”
Anakin scratched at the back of his head, and it made Obi-Wan chuckle.
“Just feel it. Don’t shut it out. Don’t favor it over the light. Just let it exist around you and understand that it is part of you. You aren’t ever going to get rid of it and it’s not going away. So accept it just like you accepted losing that hand of yours.”
“I have a fake hand though.”
“Does it feel different?”
“Of course. It’s metal.”
Obi-Wan sighed and ran his hand over his face.
“You are seriously insufferable. Just like you became accustomed to the metal hand, you will to the feeling of the darkness. It takes practice. So, get to practicing. Silently.”
Anakin sat back and nodded. He was nervous about acknowledging the darkness, that much Obi-Wan could feel easily. They sat in silence as Anakin slowly started letting it in.
He would never admit it, but Obi-Wan stayed focused on him, making sure that he didn’t fall too deeply into the darkness, pushing out waves of light whenever it seemed too overwhelming. It exhausted him, but he truly didn’t want Anakin to fall. Not like he had before. He needed his help, but he also knew Zara was going to need her best friend when all was said and done.
XXX
Zara opened her eyes and groaned. It took her a few moments for her eyes to adjust but once they did, she saw a concerned Cody looking back at her. She gave him a weak smile and tried to pull herself up, frowning at the bed under her.
“Careful, General. Take it easy.”
“Where are we? What happened?”
Cody reached over and touched her gently, searching her face for any indication she remembered. She looked back at him and slowly started to remember. He had been alone, tears in his eyes. She looked down at her arm and saw the spot that the needle had stuck in her skin. She yanked herself away from him and backed up, wincing at how sore her body was.
“What did you do to me, Cody?”
“General, please listen to me.”
“Stop calling me that. I’m not your general. I’m not.. what did you do?”
“I didn’t have a choice. He.. he’s controlling me somehow. I had to because he commanded it. He knew that you would come for me.”
“Who?”
“Palpatine.”
Zara looked around at her surroundings. She shook her head when it looked like a well-furnished room.
“Why aren’t I in a cell then?”
“You’re locked in here. There isn’t any way for you to escape and even if there was.. I’m not to let you leave.”
“We can go. Cody, we can leave and then he can’t hurt you. What is the best way to get out?”
“Zara, I can’t.”
“Yes you can. You’re strong let’s go. Between the two of us we can break out of here. Nothing will be able to-“
Cody moved over to her and grabbed her gently on each side of her face, forcing her to focus on him. He looked devastated as he sighed and shook his head.
“I can’t Zara.”
She deflated and put her hands over his, tears starting to form in her eyes.
“You really can’t.”
“No. I can’t. I can’t explain what is going on because I don’t know. I just know that I have to listen to his orders and my orders are to keep you here. I will.. I will do anything I can to keep you safe, Zara. Please.. please forgive me.”
Cody let his head hang as he looked down in shame. Zara slipped from his grasp and tossed her arms around him, hugging him close. He returned the hug, shaking as he tried to hold himself together.
“There is nothing to forgive, Cody. I’m going to find a way out of this, okay? We’re going to be okay. I promise you.”
Cody nodded and held her close, trying to anchor himself to her and the reality that they were in. Often, he felt like he was in a fog after getting an order, but she was helping him focus. She held onto him tightly as her mind raced trying to find a way out of their captivity.
“We’re going to be okay, Cody. We always are, right?”
“Right.”
Though they both were trying to convince the other, neither of them felt sure of that statement. Zara closed her eyes, still clinging to Cody, as she screamed out into the force hoping that Obi-Wan would hear her somehow.
XXX
Obi-Wan stood in front of the pile of twisted metal and ash that used to be Zara’s ship. He carded his hand over his beard, deep in thought. He could see it was deliberately blown to hell, but it had been landed already. He didn’t see any of her belongings within the wreckage which meant someone had taken them.
“The building is empty except for these.”
Anakin walked up to him and held up a set of binders that were opened. Obi-Wan hummed and looked back at the wreckage.
“Any idea where she would be?”
“No. Though I suspect the commander she came here to find has something to do with it.”
“How do we find Cody if he’s off the grid?”
“You tell me. You know the clones better than I.”
Anakin scratched the back of his head and looked at the wreckage.
“We could find Rex. If anyone is going to know anything it would be him. All the other clones really looked up to him.”
“Where do we find this Rex?”
“That may take a while. I’ll get ahold of Padme and see if she can get any information on where the clones went after they were decommissioned. Some of them still worked for the Republic but I haven’t heard of Rex being around still.”
“Go ahead. Tell Padme I say thank you for any information she may have.”
Anakin nodded and jogged over to the ship, leaving Obi-Wan alone to his thoughts. He looked around to see if there had been a struggle but couldn’t find anything. He saw one set of boot prints that were different than him and his companion. He wondered how the emergency button was hit if there was no struggle.
“Obi-Wan, Padme thinks she has a place he may be.”
“Would Cody hit the emergency button just long enough to get a message to the Jedi?”
“Probably. Sounds like something Zara and I would do if we couldn’t necessarily go.”
“Yes, she did send a message to the Jedi regardless of being taken.”
Anakin grumbled and crossed his arms.
“It doesn’t really matter what you’re feeling right now, Anakin.”
“I know. It matters that we find her. Though I can’t escape the irony that the last time she was missing I was hunting you.”
“Let’s hope this mission doesn’t end the same, yes?”
Obi-Wan walked past Anakin and smirked. He was tired of the constant resistance from the younger man when Zara was obviously in danger. He stopped when Anakin chuckled.
“You mean finding her with someone with their tongue shoved down her throat? Yeah, that would be ideal. Especially considered who-“
Anakin clutched at his own throat as Obi-Wan whipped around, using the force to shut his access to air.
“Listen here you ungrateful, incompetent excuse of a man. That is my wife and your best friend you are speaking of. If you even remotely think what I did for her and what she is going through right now is the same, then you are dumber than I ever thought possible. I need you to remember the fact that I will kill you without a second thought.”
“Your wife.. would hate you..”
“You demanded to come with me. The darkness was just too much. You turned again. You started talking about taking everything over and leading to protect your children. You had done it before; you really think she would doubt you did it again?”
He let go of Anakin, letting him fall to the ground.
“You have two options right now. You either come with me and help me find my wife and never speak of her like that again. Or you go home to your family and stay the hell out of my way.”
XXX
Zara walked down the hallway, following Cody closely. She could feel her heart racing the more she focused on their footsteps echoing off the walls. They turned the corner to a set of double doors, watching as they swung open in front of them. Zara hesitated for a moment, noticing how dark the room felt. She followed in Cody and shoved all the fear away from her mind.
“Zara, my dear! It is so wonderful to see you again.”
“I would call you Chancellor but from what I understand that is no longer your title.”
“So much more spunk when you aren’t pretending to be under my former apprentices spell.”
“If you had known me at all you would have known then I don’t fall under spells.”
“Ah, but you did marry him, yes? It was all the talk in the temple, even in the cells they kept me in all that time. Though I may have misinterpreted your connection to Lord Veth, there was a connection all the same. Say what you want, he captured you and you fell for his charm locked away on that frozen planet.”
“The way you interpret it has nothing to do with what I know as reality.”
Palpatine cackled and stood from his chair, looking down at Cody and Zara.
“Reality is such a subjective thing, Zara Fross. Or is it Zara Kenobi now? Perhaps Lady Veth? Such a long line of names, too confusing for me to keep track of.”
“My name hardly matters to you.”
“That you are correct on. You see, without even asking I know you are curious as to why you are here.”
“Let me guess, I’ll find out in due time?”
He chuckled and walked forward, stopping a few steps away from her.
“No, my dear, you will find out right now my plan. You see, I had high hopes for Lord Veth. Even higher hopes for Darth Vader. It seems like both have a weakness and it, young lady, is you.”
“So, you want to lure them here? They won’t just come here and forget about me.”
“No, they won’t. Assuming that you weren’t the largest part of the equation is a mistake I will no longer make again. Two of the most powerful force users I have ever met have been brought to their proverbial knees by you. You. The bright eyed eternal light Jedi that was able to take down the strongest darkness known the galaxy.”
“Just cut to the chase, Palpatine.”
“Very well. You see, you do have a lot of light within you. But just as much as you are their weakness, they are yours. You gave up everything for Veth. You turned your back on every principle and ideology that had been beaten into your pretty skull since you were a child. For him. And yes, he was going to leave regardless but without you I never would have been able to keep Vader.”
Palpatine started slowly walking around Zara, setting her on edge. She put her hands down at her side preparing to fight back if needed, even though she knew there was no way she would win. Especially without a lightsaber.
“With me you can learn to see the true reality around you. You can learn to harness every bit of power possible. Once you realize what side you should have been on from the beginning, then your boys will flock to stay with you. Cody, Veth and Vader. All three of them would die for you so what better people to surround yourself with. You just need a little motivation to get to where we need you to be for this to work.”
“I will never follow your lead, Palpatine. You may as well kill me now.”
“Now why would I toss away the entire palace when all I need to do is find the proper key?”
Before Zara could argue, she screamed out as Palpatine started to rip through her mind. She dropped to her knees and clutched each side of her face. She had never felt pain like that before and she wasn’t even remotely prepared.
“Oh, you are much stronger than I anticipated. It’s okay though, my dear. The pain will be worth it. I just need to find the right places and once I do, you’ll see what you are meant to.”
Cody went to step forward but stopped when Palpatine glared at him.
“You will not touch her until I tell you to, commander.”
“Yes, sir.”
He looked back down at Zara and gave her a sinister smile.
“That’s it, Zara. Don’t fight it. The more you fight me, the more it will hurt. You’ll have everything you want soon enough, just as long as you do everything, I need you to.”
Tag List: @mapplestrudel @cannedsoupsucks @momentomorai @mascaracoffee @ahsoka-padme
my oc is a white female from alderaan who was from the royal blood line! she has long brown hair that has a slight wave to it and bright emerald green eyes. she found force sensitive and is a padawan under Obi Wan Kenobi! her personality is very humorous and sarcastic she’s a rebel like anakin and her light saber color is purple! people come to her for comfort,laughs colors that show her is navy blue and dark red she’s 5’7 and clone love her cause she’s a great warrior and knows how to calm them
A/N: Sorry I didn’t keep in line with the darker colors, but I hope this still works!
Warning: Swearing. Threats of violence. Calm kidnapping. Mentions of sex in the past.
A/N: I know I said I was going to post this like two days ago but life got in the way. I hope you enjoy either way. As always, if I missed any tags please let me know!
When they got closer to presumably their destination, Veth held out a blindfold. Zara raised one eyebrow at him and shook her head.
“I’m not wearing that. Your threat of killing my men is over so you have no leverage over me.”
“I have two lightsabers and you’re stuck in this ship with me.”
“If you swing them, we both die. Are you wanting to die?”
“Are you?”
Zara scowled and crossed her arms. Veth laughed at her which only soured her mood even more.
“Me not having leverage over you is exactly why I need you to wear this. You presumably have it planned that you figure out where you are and either get a message out or escape on your own. I do not want to harm you, but I will if I have to.”
“So, wear this for my own protection?”
“Precisely, darling.”
Zara did nothing short of barking out a cackle.
“I am a Jedi Knight. I do not fear you. You may have manipulated me into going with you to keep my clones safe but that does not mean I am easily fooled.”
“You don’t trust me.”
“Would you trust me if the roles were reversed?”
“Yes.”
Zara was taken back by his swift and solid answer.
“You’ve had many chances to fight me, yet you’d prefer to talk and negotiate. You don’t want to fight if you don’t have to. That is a trait we share.”
“Sith only want destruction.”
“That is what the Jedi teach.”
“That is the truth.”
“Give me one day, Zara Fross. Comply with me for that long then you can make your decision on if you’re going to fight back or not.”
“Why a day?”
“That’s how long it will take me to ensure that you are safe before you do something reckless like jumping off a cliff.”
She found herself biting back a laugh as she reached to snatch the blindfold. Veth made a disapproving noise in the back of his throat and motioned for her to turn. Zara grimaced but turned slightly, allowing her captor to place it over her eyes and tie it. She felt her face flush when he gently turned her and ensured her eyes were completely covered.
“I bet this is the easiest kidnapping you’ve ever conducted.”
“You are right, though you aren’t the first beautiful woman I’ve put a blindfold on. Now sit there like a good girl and we will be home soon enough.”
Shocked by his tone and words, Zara sat in silence instead of arguing. She told herself that it would never be home to her, just a temporary stop before she found her way back to the Jedi. She hoped that Anakin wasn’t causing too much trouble.
---
“THAT is why you sent her without me!? You knew that creep would follow her!”
“Calm down, Anakin.” Mace said for what felt like the hundredth time.
“How can I calm down? He TOOK her!”
“She is perfectly capable of taking care of herself. There was no indication that she was harmed. He let her leave a message for Commander Cody.”
“Where is Commander Cody? He should be punished for leaving her alone in the first place.”
“Anakin Skywalker. You better watch your tone when you’re speaking to the council. I understand you care for your friend, but you need to recognize that we need to put our trust in her and her capabilities. You’re bordering on insulting with how little you believe in her.”
“Master Windu, I can’t agree with not sending someone to find her. To save her. We have no idea what that creep is doing to her.”
“We also don’t know where she is. Once we get intel on her location, we will send someone to retrieve her. Until then, you have missions that you must accomplish. The war has not stopped, and you have not been relieved of any of your responsibilities.”
Anakin sighed and deflated. He nodded at Mace and ran his hands down his face.
“You’re right, Master. Just.. please keep me updated on her while I’m gone.”
Mace nodded at him and watched him leave. Yoda turned to him once the door shut and shook his head.
“Troubled, that boy is.”
“Yes. I know him and Zara are close, but he is so reckless.”
“No different, Zara would be.”
“No but she would have at least said those things to me in private instead of the entire counsel.”
Yoda chuckled and nodded, reaching over to pat Maces hand a few times. It was unspoken, but Master Windu was just as worried about his former Padawan as Anakin was, especially if the reports about Darth Veth were true.
---
Zara hated not having some semblance of control. It was why she preferred not to fight. No one could ever predict every move someone else would make. Words were easier for her to predict. So, stumbling through the snow without being able to see was not her idea of a good time.
“We’re almost there, darling.”
“I really wish you’d stop calling me that.”
“Would you prefer princess? Love? I’m sure I could find sweet pet names to find out in different languages if that is what you would enjoy.”
Zara stopped moving, turning to where she thought the man was and tried to glare.
“Fine. Stick with darling.”
He chuckled and gripped her arm a little tighter. He wasn’t hurting her, not that he even remotely wanted to. When she had stumbled a few times, he felt bad at how petrified she was at not being able to see. He had offered to carry her but that didn’t help the fear that was basically seeping from her pores.
When her teeth started chattering, he finally gave in and scooped her up. She gasped out of surprise and started to protest. She silenced when he shushed her and tentatively held onto him, afraid of being dropped.
“It’s quicker this way. Need to get you inside before you freeze to death.”
“Well, I wouldn’t run away would I.”
He chuckled and tightened his grip on her, picking up his pace. Within a few minutes he spotted their destination and got her inside. He deposited her gently on his couch and pulled the blindfold off.
“Get your boots off. You aren’t dressed for the cold and you don’t want to lose toes because of it.”
She hesitated, taking in her surroundings but eventually pulled them off, setting them neatly by her. Veth looked at her as he was taking off his heavy jacket and boots.
“You don’t need to sit there. You can explore.”
She stood warily, wincing at the feeling returning to her feet. She walked throughout the main living space and noticed how simple it was. She half expected a home more industrial and extravagant. It didn’t scream Sith Lord to her.
Making her way down the hallway, she looked into each room. She was surprised to see that there were two bedrooms and a fairly large refresher. The last room she came to actually intrigued her enough to walk in. Every wall was covered from floor to ceiling in books and holocrons.
“I figured this would be the room I’d find you in.”
Zara glanced over her shoulder and wrapped her arms around herself. Veth walked in and stood next to her.
“You are welcome to read anything in here. I would have brought some of the texts from our meeting spot but figured they’d just be another weapon for you to use against me.”
“I wouldn’t risk destroying history like that.”
“Then I trust you all the more in my personal library. I have placed warm clothes in the refresher. Take your time as this planet has no water restrictions or issues. I will be making some food to eat. Come find me when you are done.”
He went to walk out but Zara reached out and touched his arm lightly, recoiling as soon as she did.
“Why.. why am I here?”
“Are you asking that or asking why you aren’t shackled and bleeding?”
“I guess I’m asking both.”
“Go shower. I will answer all questions within reason when you are done.”
---
Zara stepped out of the shower and wiped at the mirror in front of her. She considered braiding her hair but with the cold she needed it to dry as soon as possible. She looked down at the counter and saw that there was a brush. With a shrug she picked it up and worked it through her hair.
It had gotten much longer than she usually let it grow. When she was younger, she kept it short to keep it out of her face but now it was down to her mid back. She ran her fingers across the short side she had cut and thought of Anakin. He had dared her to do it thinking she would care too much about her hair. She had laughed so hard when she saw the expression on his face when she cut the portion.
She wondered how Anakin was. It wasn’t abnormal not to talk to him for days at a time, but now she didn’t even have the capability to. He was her best friend and the idea of not seeing him again brought a pain to her chest she had never felt before.
Zara shook her head, trying to will away the negative thoughts. Instead, she focused on the bright color of her hair. It had been another dare of Anakin. He thought Mace would be furious with her but instead he had given her a soft smile and a nod, letting her know it fit her. Master Windu always wanted her to be herself in a way that fit the code. Her appearance didn’t matter as long as she lived the code and was proud of being a Jedi.
She looked down at the clothes and frown. They were most definitely the Sith’s robes. She considered putting her own back on, but he was right; it was cold. Once she was dressed in the black robes that were just slightly too big for her, she hung her towel up and went back out to the main living area.
“Ah, hello there. I hope your shower was enjoyable.”
She nodded, not having the energy to argue with him anymore. He motioned for the table that already had food waiting for her. She sat down gently and looked at the food.
“Stars, I know I’m not a great cook, but it isn’t enough to be sad over.”
When she didn’t look up at him, he sighed and sat next to her, digging into his own food. She eventually picked up her utensils and started eating. It was warm and well-seasoned, but it did little to improve her mood.
“Lord Veth, why am I here?”
He used his napkin to pat at his mouth before sitting back in his chair. It struck her as odd at how sophisticated he was, again. It went against everything that she had been taught about the Sith and how they lived their life.
“I promised you answers. I will give you as many as I can. Then you can be informed if you want to fight against your captivity or not.”
He took a drink of the wine in front of him before crossing on leg over the other.
“I first heard of you when you started your missions with the Skywalker boy.”
“You’ve called him Ani. Why?”
“I’ll get there, my dear. I was tasked with observing you and finding a way to get you away from him. You see, my Master desperately wants the boy. He has plans for him. He doesn’t think that he will stray from the Jedi as long as you are around him. You’re a rather calming presence for him just as much as he challenges you to come out of your shell.”
“He’s my best friend.”
Zara felt her chest tighten again at the thought of Anakin and the vulnerability she was showing.
“Without you around he can fulfill the role my Master expects of him. I was given the option to just kill you but the more I learned of you the more I saw how much of a waste that would be. You’re a strong Jedi and an even smarter woman. You care deeply for those around you regardless of it being a stretch in the code you swore yourself to.”
“That doesn’t explain how you know Anakin.”
“I was with Qui Gon when he found him.”
“You?”
He chuckled and nodded, brushing his hair back out of his face.
“Yes. I went by an entirely different name back then, but I was there.”
Zara furrowed her brow and tried to figure out who he possibly could be. She chewed on her bottom lip as she tried desperately to pull up the memory.
“Master Windu told me of a padawan Master Jinn had. He died though so he took on Anakin.”
“I did not die. I’m sure he thought I did with the fiery explosion. My Masters other apprentice found me barely clinging to life. The Jedi never even looked for me.”
“That’s.. terrible. I am so very sorry that they didn’t.. there had to have been a reason they didn’t-”
Zara sat up straighter when anger flashed across the man’s face. His eyes seemed even more dangerous and for the first time she didn’t feel safe around him. She stood up and he followed, backing her against the wall. He caged her in by placing his hands on each side of her head.
“Do not mistake my civility as us being friends, Jedi. I will treat you as my guest, but I will not have the betrayal they put me through excused or brushed off by anyone. Is that understood?”
“Y-yes.”
“Good girl.”
He stood up, taking his hands from the wall and tracing his finger across her jaw gently with a feral smile. She looked up at him trying to steel herself against him. She had almost let herself forget that he was a dangerous Sith keeping her captive.
“Why don’t you finish eating then we can talk more. Like I said earlier, there is much I wish to learn about you.”
---
Zara sat curled up on the end of the couch, trying to keep warm. Regardless of what she was wearing, she couldn’t seem to shake the cold. Her previous thoughts of hating the heat were coming back to haunt her. She jumped when she felt something rest against her shoulders until she saw the Sith was laying a thick blanket across her.
“Uh, thank you.”
“You’re very welcome, my dear.”
He sat down next to her, far enough away that they weren’t touching.
“It unfortunately gets very cold at night here.”
“Where are we, Hoth?”
“No, but a planet very similar.”
“Stars how do you deal with it?”
“I manage.”
She pulled the blanket tighter around herself and shivered.
“May I ask you what your name was before?”
“You may. However, for every question I answer you need to answer two of mine.”
“Two? How is that fair?”
“Who said anything about fair?”
She looked over at him and scowled at his sly grin. She turned so she was facing him more with her knees pulled up to her chest. He was already turned slightly to the side with his legs spread apart and his arm thrown over the back of the couch.
“Fine. What was your name.”
“Obi-Wan Kenobi.”
“Obi.. wow.”
“You know the name?”
“I do. Master Jinn spoke of you often while Anakin and I were training.”
He rolled his jaw before forcing the emotion to fall from his face. He was smiling again before she even could comprehend that he had been upset.
“What planet are you from?”
“Alderaan.”
“Good family?”
“The best. Wonderful parents. Well off. Supportive in my quest to become a Jedi.”
“Interesting. That explains your education and manners.”
She shrugged and smiled softly.
“Can I assume you’re from Coruscant?”
“No. I don’t really remember though I was very young when I went there. Thus, the accent.”
“Makes sense. The Jedi usually take in children at a young age.”
“You mean steal them.”
Not wanting to anger him more, she fell silent.
“Were you at the temple before Anakin?”
“Yes. Not very long though. Maybe a week or two if I remember correctly.”
“Then I just missed you it seems.”
She nodded and shivered again.
“What is the extent of your relationship with Skywalker?”
Her head shot up at that question. She looked him directly in his eyes and saw a cautious curiosity.
“I’ve told you. He’s my best friend.”
“It seems deeper than that. He was positively furious when I called you darling.”
“He’s.. protective. He had to leave his mother and I was the first person he truly connected to after that. Master Windu worried he was corrupting me but there were many times he kept me sane.”
“Explain more, please.”
She smirked and shook her head.
“You’re being awfully careful not to ask another question.”
“Trying to play by the rules, my dear.”
She chuckled and played with the edge of the blanket.
“I think maybe if there hadn’t been a code, we would have grown closer.”
“So, you turned him down.”
“Not necessarily. It’s not like we talked about it. We just knew it wasn’t what the Jedi would need from us. Have you ever been in love?”
“Yes.”
She decided not to press him more when his answer was clipped. She lowered her eyes and chewed on her bottom lip again.
“Do you love Anakin?”
“I.. I’ve never let myself love anyone. My destiny is to be a Jedi Master. I won’t let anything deter that.”
“Interesting. So, you don’t indulge in physical pleasure?”
She snorted and he raised his eyebrows in response.
“I’m not a prude. I just don’t let myself feel possessive or attached to them.”
“So, why not with Anakin then? You two are already close.”
She shrugged and laughed, her face feeling warm.
“Doesn’t really need to be thought about. It didn’t happen and won’t.”
“You’re rather open with me. Not what I expected considering who your Master was.”
“I would rather give you this information willingly in a way that I can benefit from it. Considering what the alternative is I think it’s safer that way.”
He chuckled and carded his hand through his hair again.
“You are wise beyond your years, darling. I do wonder why you were so willing to tell me about Anakin though. You know he is in danger.”
“Nothing that I told you is anything you couldn’t have found out just by watching us. You actually probably would have assumed there was more to it. I know the counsel did many times.”
Zara let out a yawn, trying to cover her face as she did. Veth chuckled and stood, motioning for her to lay down on the couch.
“There is a spare room, but it is much warmer out here. I’ll check on the fire throughout the night.”
She curled up and made sure the blanket was wrapped tightly around her. He added more wood to the fire and dusted his hands off as he stood up. He paused at the doorway and looked at the sleepy Jedi on his couch.
“Goodnight, Zara.”
“Goodnight, Lord Veth.”
“You can call me Obi Wan, if you’d prefer.”
“I thought we weren’t friends, Obi Wan?”
“You’re starting to grow on me a bit, darling.”
With a smirk he left, leaving her even more confused than the first time she met him. Zara was terrified of the situation she was in but knew she had to play his game. As she drifted to sleep, she worried about her best friend and what they could possibly want from him. She had to find a way to warn him and protect him.
“Zara. Zara dear, you need to wake up. Come on, sweetheart.”
She woke with a gasp and looked around, unaware of where she was. She jumped when she realized Obi Wan was kneeling by the couch with his hand on her shoulder. He looked worried; his hair still disheveled from sleeping.
“W-what? What is it?”
“You were crying out in your sleep. Gave me a terrible fright when I heard you. Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Yeah, I’m f-fine. Sorry. Sorry for startling you.”
“What was wrong?”
“I just.. I have nightmares. I’m fine. I’ll be fine. Don’t let me keep you up.”
She sat up, pulling away from his touch. He stood and moved to the fire, tending to it like he had been doing it his entire life. She watched him as she worked on controlling her breathing. Although nightmares weren’t new to her, being woken by someone she didn’t know was. She felt ashamed and embarrassed that he had heard her crying.
“Tell me, darling, do the Jedi know of your nightmares?”
“It’s hard to find one of us who doesn’t have them. War never really leaves us.”
“You’re fighting against a droid army.”
“We don’t use droids to fight.”
Her voice was harsh and clipped, surprising Obi Wan. He walked to her, stopping only to kneel in front of her on the floor. She wrapped the blanket tighter around her and watched him with unease.
“You really do care about your clones, don’t you?”
“They’re people. Living breathing people. Their history or how they came to life doesn’t concern me. What concerns me is-“
“Stars, Zara, they’re just clones. More can be made.”
“You sound like Senator Palpatine. So high and mighty that you have no regard for life. Even now you play games with me, dangling the idea of my death over my head. You’re no better than a bored loth cat playing with a mouse.”
“Are you comparing yourself to a rodent?”
He smirked and it infuriated Zara. She snarled and tried to get up, wanting space between the two of them. Before she could even fully try, Obi Wans hands shot out and grabbed her thighs tightly, keeping her in place.
“No, Lord Veth, I am comparing you to a predator with absolutely no humanity. Your tricks will not work on me. You may have been a Jedi once, but it is clear as day that you are no longer harboring any shred of light in you. Go ahead and pretend that you’re civil and sophisticated while you keep me prisoner on this despot of a planet. It doesn’t matter how kind or human you pretend to be. You’re nothing short of a monster. You’ll never be able to hide the evil coursing through you when it burns so brightly through your eyes.”
Zara held back a wince as his grip tightened on her legs. The normal playfulness that he usually held on his face was long gone. The more she spoke, the angrier he became.
“There she is. There is the conceited Jedi I knew had to have been in there. I saved your life, little knight. I spared your men knowing that it would harm you to wipe them out. I let you stay awake and conscious of what was happening. I gave you my clothes to wear so you would be warm and let you know parts of me that I didn’t need to divulge. Without me, you would be dead along with your entire regiment.”
“How do I even know a single thing you’ve said to me is true? Sith lie.”
“Now you question my integrity? When have you discovered anything I have said to you is a lie?”
“It all has to be a lie! Why would anyone that follows the dark want Anakin? He is a good man. He is devoted to those he loves and the family he has created within the order. He would never fall to the dark side. He wouldn’t do that to them. He wouldn’t do that to-“
“To what? Or were you going to say to who? He wouldn’t do that to you. Is that what you were going to say? Hmm?”
When Zara fell silent Obi Wan laughed out darkly.
“My dear, pull the right strings and anyone could fall to the dark. He has a weakness, and it is you.”
“It’s not like that with me!”
“Does he know that? You see, I have been in love before and it didn’t matter how far away I ended up from her. It never went away. Even once I heard of her death, I still mourned her and the love we could have shared if I had just let myself fall.”
She shook her head quickly.
“He will do what our master’s ask of us. He will help win this war and-“
“Now who is the liar, Zara? I’ve heard some doozies coming from the lips of Jedi, but I have never heard someone so willing to lie when the truth is right in their face. The fall of Anakin Skywalker has already begun. Your absence, regardless of what is causing it, is going to make him desperate. He will do anything to either get you back or avenge you. Look me in the eyes and tell me that I’m wrong.”
Zara opened her mouth to argue but quickly shut it.
“That’s what I thought.”
He released her legs and stood, looking down at her with anger.
“Get some rest. Lack of sleep makes you ungrateful and it’s not a good look.”
Once he was in his room, punctuated by a slam of his door, Zara finally let her tears fall. She wanted to talk to Master Windu to get clarity. She needed to hear that Veth, Obi Wan, whoever he was, was wrong. Feeling hopeless and helpless wasn’t something she was accustomed to and it was tearing her to shreds.
Here we are. The very very end. Thank you for all of you that have read this and given me motivation to write this story. It’s been one of my favorite to write!
Zara had never once regretted leaving the Jedi order. Living with Obi Wan had been more relaxing than either of them anticipated. They worked together to build the small cabin into more of a home. Other than their one trip to his old home, which was burned to nothing, they didn’t leave their own little paradise.
The only thing that Zara missed was Anakin. Mace had decided that it was best for Zara to stay away from him, so the last thing she heard from her best friend was that he hated her. It wasn’t something that she talked about, but it left her heart in pieces.
There were mornings where Obi Wan would wake up to her sitting alone on the porch. He knew that he couldn’t fix it for her, so he would just join her and sit in silence until she was ready to start their day. She would give him a soft smile and kiss on the cheek, a silent thank you for supporting her in the way she needed.
The day came when Obi Wan finally brought up her friend. He waited until she was done with her normal routine, gently grabbing her wrist before she could stand up.
“Darling, can we talk?”
She sat back down and nodded.
“I try not to bring up the past or push you to speak on things that upset you. I think we need to discuss Anakin.”
She sighed and slumped slightly.
“There isn’t much to talk about.”
“You have not told me what happened, other than leaving the order.”
“Nothing happened. I showed up there and he was taken away.”
“You never had the opportunity to talk about things?”
“The last thing he said to me was he feels nothing but hate for me.”
“Oh, sweetheart. I am so terribly sorry. What a terrible way to leave things. No wonder you’re hurting.”
She laughed humorlessly and crossed her arms.
“Says the man who hates an entire order of people.”
“I hardly waste the time on hating them, sweetheart. I may still find my power from the dark side, but I do not hate them. Not forgiving someone is entirely different from hating them.”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”
“You are more than forgiven, my love. Do you know where Anakin is now?”
“Last I heard he was on Naboo with Padme. I have no idea if he is still there. I don’t even know if he would see me.”
“Well, coming from someone who spent an exuberant amount of time not feeling any type of closure, I think it may warrant you going there to find out.”
She looked at him warily and shook her head.
“I don’t know.”
“I will go with you. We will go visit Naboo. If we find out that Anakin is there, you can decide if you want to see him or not.”
“Are you even allowed anywhere near Republic channels?”
“Of course, I am. Sidious never broadcasted he had an apprentice other than Darth Maul. There has never been a warrant out for my capture nor is there any evidence I did anything wrong. I doubt the Jedi Order would put a warrant out for someone traveling with their friend.”
Zara laughed and shrugged her shoulders.
“I’ll agree as long as you’re going and as long as I have the choice to see him or not.”
“When have I ever not given you a choice?”
“Ever the chivalrous kidnapper.”
“I do have manners.”
XXX
The two of them landed on Naboo and Zara smiled at how beautiful it was. She had visited before, but it was always on missions and never left the opportunity for her to explore. Obi Wan had called ahead and reserved a cabin near a lake for them, knowing how much Zara loved the water.
Neither of them wore cloaks or even garnered a glance from the locals. Even Obi Wan’s bright yellow eyes didn’t seem to matter there. It put both of them at ease. Zara was unsure of what she would decide if Anakin was still there, but either way it was a beautiful place to visit.
Zara walked into the cabin first, gasping when she realized someone was leaning on the table, their arms crossed over their chest.
“Anakin.”
“Did you think you could land here with a Sith and me not notice?”
Zara froze, wishing she had decided to make a new saber after all. Anakin put his hands up to show he wasn’t going to hurt her before letting them drop to his side.
“I’m not here to fight you, Zara. Either of you. I figured you came here for a reason since I know Mace told you where I was.”
“He did. And I did. Although it wasn’t my idea.”
Obi Wan stepped in behind her, gently shutting the door.
“Figured you would beat us here, Anakin.”
“Veth.”
Zara sighed and ran her hand down her face.
“His name is Obi Wan, Anakin. If you’re going to be in the place where we are currently staying, please be respectful.”
He grunted and watched Obi Wan put things away. Zara took his distracted state to check him for weapons and it surprised her to see he had no saber.
“Order took it. Apparently, I’m not allowed to have one as one of the conditions of my release.”
“Sorry. I wasn’t trying-“
“It’s fine, Zara.”
“Do, do you want to talk outside for a bit? The dock looks nice.”
“Water is better than lava, right?”
Zara grimaced, making Anakin sigh. Obi Wan gave her a reassuring smile and nod, going back to putting things away as she walked outside. She led the way down to the docks and sat down, crossing her legs so they didn’t touch the water. Anakin waited for a moment before joining her, turned slightly so there was distance between them.
“How much did the order tell you before you left?”
“Not much. Whole thing is a little foggy to be honest. Padme offered to let me see the hologram recording of most of it, but she warned me how upsetting it would be.”
“You don’t remember?”
He shook his head and leaned back against one of the posts of the dock.
“I remember Palpatine telling me where you were and that V-Obi Wan was going rogue against his wishes. I.. remember pledging myself to the dark side if it mean I could get you back.”
“Oh, Ani.”
“I just.. I had been looking so long for you. I barely slept. All I had was nightmares of finding you dead, Zar. I finished my missions but every moment other than that was spent looking for you. When I found out that the Jedi knew where you were I just snapped. I went to where you were and saw your broken saber. It was just too much.”
“Didn’t need to burn it to the ground. Was a little dramatic, but I shouldn’t expect much else from you I guess.”
Zara forced a smile and Anakin chuckled.
“I remember landing and seeing you. I’ve never felt so much darkness or rage. I don’t.. I don’t remember what I did. I don’t even remember what I said. It’s been haunting me, Zara. Padme knew where you were with V-Obi Wan but.. she told me that I needed to come to you and that’s when I knew I must have done something absolutely terrible.”
“Maybe it’s best if you don’t remember.”
He moved forward and took her hand in his, squeezing it tightly. Zara shut her eyes and let out a shaky breath.
“Zara, please. I can see the fear and hurt written all over your face. I can’t even begin to atone for my actions if I don’t know what I did.”
She nodded and pulled her hand from his, wrapping her arms around herself.
“You showed up and it was all part of Palpatine’s plan. I could have stayed where he sent you, but I knew you wouldn’t listen. You’d just grab me and run no matter what I said. I went to Mustafar with Obi Wan, but I didn’t anticipate it being so dark. It made my stomach churn it was just so fucking dark.”
“He wanted me around that?”
She nodded and shifted slightly, uncomfortable to even face the situation.
“I tried to tell you everything, but you just kept saying you were going to save me. Obi Wan put himself between us because you were erratic. You charged at him and had no consideration that I was right there with no weapon to protect myself. Obi Wan fought you off and begged me to move. When I did, he used the force to push me into the building trying to make more distance. You used the force to throw a bunch of rocks into the doorway to block me from leaving.”
“I.. I did all of that? I don’t- I wouldn’t ever want to hurt you.”
“I ran down the hallways stopping to see the two of you fighting. You had already hurt him once on his arm. He kept fighting though. You were going to kill him if given even the slightest chance. When I finally got outside it was just in time to catch him falling from higher ground. You had hurt him pretty badly. There was no way he was going to get back on his feet.”
“It should make me happy that I bested him, but nothing about this feels good. What happened then?”
“I ran to him. I knew you wouldn’t understand my connection to him. I’m sure you still don’t. You just weren’t there anymore. Your eyes.. they were changing. You told me to move so you could kill him where he was. It wasn’t the honorable thing though. He couldn’t fight you. He wasn’t even your enemy, and you just wouldn’t listen to me.”
Zara felt tears start to sting her eyes that she wiped away quickly. Anakin moved forward but stopped himself when she flinched.
“We fought then. I used his saber and we fought. I begged you to stop so we could leave and get help. I just wanted you both safe when it was neither of you that started the whole thing. We were all just pawns. Then you almost fell into the lava and I saved you. The only problem was it put you closer to Obi Wan and you weren’t stopping.”
She placed her finger on the scar on her lip, letting him see it. He frowned and shook his head, running his hand across his face.
“I did that.”
She nodded and took a few breaths. It was harder for her to talk about than she thought possible, especially with Anakin.
“Elbow to the face. Obi Wan told me I had to kill you; it was the only way to stop you. I couldn’t though. I couldn’t kill my best friend. He used the force to stop you and right before I made you sleep you told me.. you told me that you had loved me but all you felt at that point was hate.”
“Shit.”
He moved forward more slowly and gently took her hands in his.
“Zar, I’ve always cared very deeply for you. I think back then if given the chance I would have gladly been with you. I mean we both know that. I know that it isn’t, wasn’t, reciprocated. I let Palpatine twist my mind and my memory of us. I never should have treated you like that. I don’t hate you. I am so sorry I hurt you. I am so sorry I didn’t listen to you.”
“You’re.. you’re okay now?”
He nodded, still holding onto her hands.
“I’m not ever going to be the same. It changed me but I am as close to normal as I’m going to be I think.”
“I can’t quite tell you how happy I am to hear that.”
“What about you? Are you okay?”
She shrugged, looking over at the cabin to see Obi Wan leaning against the wall reading. She could tell he was keeping track of their emotions to make sure that she was safe. She smiled at him before looking back at Anakin.
“I am. Not where I thought I would be but I’m happy.”
“What happened to Zara Fross, Jedi Master?”
“Oh, they offered it to me. A seat on the council too. I turned it down.”
“Wow. Never thought I’d see the day.”
She laughed and shrugged, Anakin letting her go, sitting back with an amused smile.
“After everything I just couldn’t stay. I don’t really have any hard feelings against them or anything, but I could never go back.”
“Where are you living now?”
“Scarif. We live by the water in the warm weather. It’s really nice to feel peace after everything. You? You live here?”
“Yeah. I live here with uh.. with Padme.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. Actually, we got married a while ago.”
“Married!?”
Zara sat up with a smile and Anakin rubbed the back of his neck as he chuckled.
“She’s great. Not sure when it turned from her trying to help me to us being in love but-“
“Hey, I get it. I know that you’ll never understand Obi Wan. I don’t need you to. There’s a lot to that story though.”
“I’d like the chance to hear it some time.”
“I’d like that.”
“Good. Padme wants you to come to dinner. Both of you.”
“No trying to kill him.”
“Padme would kill me if I was rude to a guest. You’re both welcome there. Look, I know that we’re never going to be able to go back to the way things used to be. Neither of us are the same person we were back then. I just, I want to get to know who you are now. I miss you.”
“I miss you too, Ani. Just give us the address and we will be there.”
XXX
Zara and Obi Wan settled into the bed after a long evening with Padme and Anakin. It had been icy at first, but Padme was a fantastic politician. She quickly had Obi Wan and Anakin discussing tactics and ideologies. They were both surprised to find out their thought process was similar.
“Thank you for going with me.”
“The pleasure was all mine, darling. How do you feel about Anakin becoming a father?”
“I’m honestly excited for him. I’m excited for them both. Just seeing the way that he is with Padme made me happy. He never would have had that kind of peace with the order. I’m glad he’s getting the life he’s always wanted.”
“That is very true. What about you?”
“Hmm?”
She nestled into his side and looked up at him.
“What kind of life do you want?”
“I think I’m still learning that. My entire life was wrapped around the order. I can say that I hope we never face another hardship in our lives, but I know that isn’t realistic.”
“It’s not. Not all darkness is as charming as mine is.”
She laughed and kissed his chest.
“If you’re asking about kids, I don’t know. I’ve never thought about being a mother nor did I think I would care enough about someone to be with them. I don’t think I need to have children to feel fulfilled in my life.”
“Is that what we are? Together?”
Zara looked at him and narrowed her eyes.
“I’m kidding darling. Of course, we’re together. What about marriage?”
“I’m not opposed to marriage. As long as it’s the right person.”
“The right person, hmm?”
Obi Wan looked down at her and growled when she started giggling. He pounced on top of her and kissed her roughly.
“Yeah. I’ll let you know when I meet them.”
“Please don’t forget that I am dangerous, darling. I would never willingly harm you, but I will hurt anyone who thinks they have any claim to what is mine.”
“Mmm, I kind of like when you get possessive.”
“Oh, you are corrupted indeed.”
She giggled and nodded before he kissed her.
“What would you think of me buying a home here?”
“On Naboo?”
“I figure it’s a beautiful place. There is still water and you’d be able to be closer to Anakin.”
“You’d buy a home for us just so I could be closer to someone who tried to kill you.”
“Darling, I’d buy you the galaxy if that’s what would make you happy.”
“You’re far too good to me.”
“Let me show you just how good I am.”
“Oh, you’ve shown me before, Obi Wan.”
“And I will show you as often as I can until it is our time to become one with the force.”
