about a year ago, you wrote agape. i just want to tell you that your fic completely destroyed me and i love it to this day. i got my other friends to read it and we all agree that agape is one of the best reader inserts in the fandom. we love it. and we love you. this is long overdue, but thank you for writing agape, and thank you for sharing it with us. <3
You know, I think I needed this.
Sometimes, I write and I think, “Ah, this isn’t good enough to put online.” Or I think, “Who would actually enjoy these things?” But in the end, ultimately, I post everything I write, because who knows, maybe my self-indulgent impulsive writing will actually connect with someone who feels the same way I do.
And Agape is by far the fic that shouts that, screams that, at me. I had wrote it thinking, “who would actually like this?” It was a fic that involved witch craft, reincarnation, a completely different world was built and revolved around the main character, you - the reader, and it’s not something some people would read since it’s a reader/self insert and those are apparently weird.
And yet, people loved it. People told me Agape was great. They told me they were on board the entire time throughout the entire emotional rollercoaster ride of that fic. And though I wrote it for my own self indulgence, people genuinely enjoyed it.
And it amazes me.
I never thought I’d ever get so emotionally invested in a fic like I did with Agape. I cried while writing some parts, I got upset writing other parts, but I loved the overall experience. And being able to share that with people and receive feedback like these?
This gives me reason to write. So thank you for reading Agape. Thank you for coming back to it. And thank you for reaching out and telling me that you enjoyed it, loved it, and felt connected to it. Thank you for sharing it with your friends. And just- thank you.
No words can express how much it means to receive comments like these. And I’m just so overwhelmed that people would even remember a fic enough to come back to it. So thank you.
Dedicated to @may-vin, @castaform, @watch-out-for-them, and @lawyersuperpowers. I love you guys. (:
i. interactions
From what you can recall, he was always polite. The kind yet small smile on his face was one that was given to the customers, but it held a strange detachment to it that you couldn't quite put a finger on. You sat there with mild confusion as you watched him through the window of your cafe from across the street to the flower shop at which he worked at.
With the two of you always in charge of opening shop, your interactions with him were always in the mornings.
Good morning, how are you doing, i'm good, have a nice day.
You sighed as you got off the chair, and you mumbled, "I really do wish we had more chances to talk.."
"[F/N]," you glanced back and saw the fond smile on your manager's face and you smirked, "You're so sly."
"Well, you wanted to talk to them didn't you? We aren't busy right now," he chuckled and you muttered, "Stop reading me."
"Stop being obvious then. Now go, you wanted to be his friend didn't you?"
You grabbed the tray of coffee without another word, but the flush on your cheeks makes your manager laugh at you as you turn away. He doesn't regret it, but he really did wish you had more courage on your own. But as soon as you make your way across the street, you awkwardly stand before the glass door as you struggled to open the door with your hands full. The polite male that you started your mornings with noticed you, and with a bright smile, he opens the door.
"Hey Lukas," you laughed and you gently move the tray of coffee forward and smiled, "Delivery for the lovely florists across the streets."
"[F/N]," the surprise was evident on his face and his smile widened, "Thank you so much. But really, you didn't need to."
"Well, it's on the house, don't worry about it," you brushed off his concern and glanced around, "I thought Forsyth and Python would be in by now as well."
Lukas takes a sip of the coffee before answering, "They'll be here in about half a hour. I'm the only one here this early."
Your eyes widened and you fondly shook your head, "Don't overwork yourself."
His eyes widened just slightly and he smiled, "You too, [F/N]."
ii. lunch
"Hello, welcome to-" you paused mid-greeting and smiled, "Hey Lukas, what are you doing here?"
He gives you a sheepish smile and admitted, "I forgot my lunch at home. I thought maybe I could grab something here."
Your lips form an 'o' and you asked, "What would you like today, dear customer?"
His gaze slowly trails through the menu as you waited patiently for his answer. But instead, you see a small smile on his face and he asked, "Would you recommend me something?"
Your eyes widened and then you laughed, "Well, aren't you a surprise?" You paused as you leaned away from the counter and you gestured to an empty table, "Take a seat, I'll get to you."
"Oh, but-"
"It's okay, don't worry about payment, consider it my treat since I'm starting my lunch break too," you answered as you made your way towards the back kitchen. A sigh escapes the male's lips, but he can't fight down the smile that threatens to make a permanent spot on his lips.
"Sorry to keep you waiting!" Lukas looks up from his phone, just in time to see you place down two cups of coffee and two sandwiches. You give him a small smile and asked, "I hope you don't mind having a simple PB&J, it's the only thing I could make since the chefs are still using the kitchen."
He gives you a smile and shakes his head, "I'll take whatever you give, [F/N]. I can't thank you enough for the free lunch."
"Hey, we're friends, knock it off already," you laughed and brushed him off. But the remainder of your lunch was spent over coffee and laughter. It was one of the most relaxing afternoons you've ever had, and you could only hope that many more like these could happen more frequently.
iii. late
As the seasons turned and the weather got colder and colder, the cafe shop hours grew later and later. A sigh escapes your lips as you finally find some sort of breather as the people that all trickled finally died down to just the occasional one or two customers. You glance over at the old grandfather clock that sat by the bar counter.
Eleven pm.
A slight grimace crosses your visage as you can't help but feel as though the hours were just dragging on and on. All you really wanted to do was to go home, but being one of the older workers in the shop meant that you had no choice but to stay up a little bit later.
But the later it gets, the darker it gets. And the streetlights around here aren't all that... illuminating. You sighed, but the jingle of the bell catches your attention. You straighten up immediately and your lips part to greet the customer, only for your voice to hitch and you dumbly asked, "Lukas?"
He gives you a polite smile and asked, "Still here?"
"Ah," you paused and nodded, "I'm closing. What are you doing here?"
He doesn't quite answer and instead glances past you at the clock and easily answered, "It's getting late."
You can't help but deadpan and mumbled, "No shit."
Lukas chuckles at your choice of words and you pout, "Did you need something?"
Before he can respond, the sound of a very strong pat resounds on your back and you flinch, jolting forward slightly. Lukas' eyes widened at the sight, but his hand curls up into a fist to hide his chuckle at the scene before him. You flailed your arms slightly at your boss, who only scolded you back for being rude to a customer.
There was a full blown pout on your lips now and you mumbled, "Sorry Lukas."
"It's fine," he chuckled, and there was another pause before he asked, "Are you closing?"
Another nod, and he said, "I'll wait then."
Your eyes widened, but you didn't get to see his face as he went to go find a booth.
"I can't let you walk home alone, after all."
iv. welcome back
You stretched as you finally got off the plane. A week of being away from home was tiring, but you really appreciated that break from work. It was exciting, breaking away from your routine of going to work to do something else. Of course, you were really tired, but it was still worth it when you finally had the chance to explore the world like you planned to.
After dropping off your stuff back at your apartment, you make your way towards the coffee shop, deciding to pop in for a late night coffee and to tell your boss you were back. But you were surprised when you see Lukas peering into the shop window from outside.
"Lukas?"
He flinched, but when those dark red hues rested on your figure, the way they widened and the way in which they looked so relieved makes whatever thoughts in your head fly away. You take the first step towards him, since he appears to be rooted in place.
"Lukas?" you repeated, and this time he actually responds. But it was in the form of a small smile, and he softly whispered, "Welcome back, [F/N]."
It was your turn to be surprised and you slowly nodded your head in a stuttering and twitching sort of manner, "I-I'm back."
There was a quiet and comfortable air between the two of you, and he chuckled, "I'm glad you're back."
"Are you now?" you asked, but you can tell even if he doesn't answer, simply from the way he held his stature and from the slight crinkle at the corners of his eyes. You laughed, and then asked, "So, what's that behind your back?"
He glances back, and then he clears his throat before bringing it forward. The flower arrangement was simple, yet absolutely endearing and you muttered, "You know, Lukas, I never took you to be the sentimental type."
He chuckles, as you gently take the arrangement from him and he answered, "I didn't believe I was either."
He pauses as he watches the way your hands delicately brushed over each flower as though they were made of glass. But you couldn't help it, not when he had made the arrangement specifically while thinking of you.
i. repeat
The first time he noticed you was the way you had entered the cafe every day around noon. You never once ordered a drink, but your friend that accompanied you certainly did. Instead, you would politely ask to use the piano in the corner of the quiet cafe, and with each agreement came a bright smile on your face.
He had expected you to be like every other customer who had asked to play the piano. Either horrible and just clueless about what they were doing, or to be goofing around and treating it as a synthesizer. But when your hands flew over the monochromatic keys as though they were dancing to a tune that only you knew of, he was captivated and starstruck.
You had put that song on repeat in his head.
ii. talents
[L/N] [F/N].
That was your name. When you had finally introduced it to his loud co-worker, he hadn't expected to remember it so easily. But the way your name so fluidly rolled off his tongue was just like your music. Both of them had somehow gotten stuck in his head and he sighed as he tried to get rid of it. But he couldn't.
Just like how he couldn't get over the sight of you strumming a guitar and singing along a soft tune. Ever now and then stopping to scribble something onto the notebook that sat, opened and pages spread across the bar top you were leaning precariously against. The high wooden chair supported most of your weight, but with the way you sat in order to sit the guitar comfortably in your lap makes him wonder if you could potentially fall off or if your back hurt from leaning against the wood. But he can't help but hum along to the unnamed song that you spun out of the air.
There was something about it that made him feel oddly at home each time he heard it.
iii. peace
He didn't realize how much he loved your music until he was trying to study. Nothing was working for him. The silence was too quiet, and the background noise from the clacking of keyboard tiles against keyboard tiles was grating. It wasn't until he found your music profile online that he finally found himself at peace for those two weeks of absence without your music.
But when he had gone away on leave for a week, he wasn't expecting to come back to his job with you looking so surprised at his return. He barely clocked in, and was in the process of neatly tying the uniform's apron around his waist when he hears you call his name. Surprise and wonder laced the tone of your voice, and when his chocolate orbs met your bright gaze, a smile blossoms on your face, and you greeted, "Welcome back, Hajime-kun."
His lips form a small 'o' as he glances at you, and then a small smile graces his visage and he responded, "Yeah, I'm back."
It was a short interaction, shorter than the usual small talk he had with you in between the quiet hours of working at his part time job at the cafe. But for whatever reason, it felt much more intimate than any other time.
iv. yearning
A month. You were gone for a month. He didn't realize he would miss the random tunes from your piano, or the consistent strumming and lull of your guitar. But he should have expected it. He sighs in realization that he's become attached to you, but in what way, he's not too sure. Your music soothed his soul and warmed his heart. It brought him a peace of mind that he never knew he could reach before he heard them.
But his best friend, and childhood friend, insists that it's not just the music that Iwaizumi misses. But he's not too sure if he wants to enter that realm of thoughts. After all, if he misunderstands any of it, he could potentially ruin a friendship that took him many many years to cultivate. A sigh escapes his lips as he finishes making a cup of latte for himself. He glances at his childhood friend, but a smirk comes to his lips as he thinks about how correct his friend is.
But he keeps it to himself, for he knows he will never hear the end of it if he admitted that Oikawa was right that Iwaizumi did miss a certain musician.
v. muse
The next time he sees you, he's surprised that he's in an audience filled with people, and you're on stage performing to said audience. But it appears that among all the college students that applied to perform at the show, you were one of the few who made the cut. The swell of pride and joy when he sees you capturing the stage and calling it your own steals his breath away and he can't help but smile widely at how vibrant and alive you looked on stage.
But it wasn't until after the mini outdoor concert that he runs into you as you're escaping from the campus newspaper team. Surprise is evident on both parties, but upon seeing the way you flinched as your name was called, Iwaizumi merely takes a hold of your wrist and pulls you away from the stage, the lights, and the crowd of newly acquired fans.
As the two of you reach and emptier section of campus, you sit down beside him on one of the benches and laughed, "What an adventure."
"So that's what you've been up to this entire time?"
"Yeah," you nodded and then mumbled, "Sorry, I should've said something."
His eyes widen, but he gives you a small smile before gently poking your forehead, "Don't apologize, you were working on your music, weren't you?"
It was your turn to be surprised that he figured it out, and you nodded. A bright smile is evident on your features and you laughed, "I really wanted to do well."
He doesn't answer, but the way his gaze is focused solely on you as though nothing else in the world mattered makes you continue, "I wanted to impress you."
As though you couldn't surprise him more, you do, and the blush that accompanies both parties after such a bold confession makes him clear his throat awkwardly and you stuttered, "S-Sorry! I-It's... it's just you.. Hajime-kun..."
Your voice trails off and you give him a small, yet embarrassed smile, "You were my muse for my music. And I just... wanted to make you proud."
He can barely hold his gaze with you, but instead he finds himself hiding his face with his hands. His hands cup his nose and his mouth, as though blocking the way his smile was so wide and goofy along with the visible flush on your face from you. Still, you can see it on the tips of his ears, but you say nothing as you return the hidden smile with one of your own.
Because you know, and he knows, that even if nothing else is said, all of it has been conveyed through the smaller actions, and the sound of your music.
This is a sequel to the first one I wrote... which is somewhere on my queu so I can’t link it yet. but I’ll fix all my stuff once my queue dies.
i. seaside
Sometimes he can still hear your voice whenever he walked by that secluded alcove of a beach. The permanent scowl on his face softened as he subconsciously touched the bracelet on his wrist. He couldn't help it, especially not when he was around this area. The sunlight that filtered through the clouds and reflected on the calm waves reminded him of the shimmer of your tail. It made him miss the way your eyes lit up each time he showed you something new - something foreign to you.
He missed seeing the way your gaze was always so filled with awe and admiration. He could be telling you random things about his day, or explaining to you what gems were and how they enhanced his abilities. You'd always listen to him so patiently, and so filled with acceptance and hospitality.
He sighed before slowly dragging his feet out of the sand and into the cool gentle waves.
He never would have thought he'd actually miss you this much.
ii. gentle waves
On certain days, when you were allowed to, you'd travel to the surface. Of course, you only really visited two places in particular: the alcove and the pier. But whenever you had reached shallow waters, the pier was devoid of life, and the alcove was as quiet as ever. But regardless, you'd slowly beach yourself onto the smooth, weathered rocks to watch the moonlight reflect off the cresting waves.
You never forgot the sight. You couldn't especially not when you saw how his face had softened that one night and how it was filled with a calmness that you've never seen on him when he was around others. You sighed as you pressed your cheek against the cool stone. You would honestly wish for nothing more if you could just see him one more time. If you could listen to his ambitions, his dreams, and his insecurities, and just provide him a listening ear.
You never would have imagined that you'd fall into such a cliched loop of becoming infatuated with your savior.
iii. calm before the storm
You didn't expect a reunion to work in a such a way. But the waves were rough, and talks around the undersea kingdom were ominous. You couldn't help but flicker through the coral and caverns, double checking and reconfirming the possible horror that was approaching. You could feel it in the water though. The anxious energy was prominent in the water and you couldn't help but approach your father.
"No, [F/N]."
The pout on your lips that you came in with blew into a full out scowl, and you muttered, "I said nothing yet."
"It's much too dangerous."
"More so for them than for us," you countered. Your tail flicked in irritation, and the small current you created makes everyone standing behind you frantically swim away. You sighed, "Father."
"[F/N]," he sighed as he slowly drifted towards you, "I cannot bear the thought of losing you again."
"It won't happen. I can control it now. Let me help."
He wanted to say no, but the determination and concern that flickered in your eyes makes him resign. He could only pray for the safety of both you, his people, and those above. For the last time a storm this big rolled in, the damages that they all suffered were immeasurable.
iv. eye of the storm
"Hey, do you think this is safe...?" Uraraka mumbled as their ship set sail. The rest of their crew muttered in agreement as they heard the rumble of the thunder above and the crashing of the waves below. Bakugou leaned over the ship's railing, but he frowned upon the ferocity of the waves.
They were unwelcoming, and extremely hostile. It was nothing like what he saw back in that small alcove. But his thoughts couldn't help but casually drift back to you. Was it just as bad beneath the surface? Or were you too far below for this to affect you? He shook his head, as though trying to get rid of the thoughts of you that plagued him at random times of the day.
"Bakugou, you head inside."
"I was planning on it," he grumbled. But when the thunder roars and boat shakes and creaks under impact of the waves makes him stumble forward. He barely catches his balance, but it wasn't soon enough, not quite fast enough. He hears his name being called, he can recognize the fear in their voice. But he doesn't realize it quickly enough until the rain comes pouring down, and his grip slips.
"Bakugou!"
"Kacchan!"
Shit. He tries to reach out, grab anything. But he couldn't reach, he couldn't see. All he could hear after that moment of blackness was the bubbling of his own breath, as he struggled to fight the waves.
But when his eyes opened, the last thing he remembers seeing was you.
v. returning the favor
"East," you mumbled. The small group that followed you quickly changed direction with one flick of their tails. You lead the way, following what you assumed to be the sounds of a boat. But there was something else compelling you to go in that direction. You weren't sure what exactly it was, but whatever it was, you trusted your instincts to lead you there.
But the closer you got to the surface, the more the anxious bubble that was slowly welling within you made you feel heavier and fearful.
"[F/N]! The boat looks like it might tilt!"
Your eyes widened in fear and you shouted, "Go handle the other side, I'll try to pull the water away!"
"O-Okay!" They immediately made their way to the opposite side. I have control now. Your eyes were lined with a sliver of blue, and you extend your arms forward, until your palms look as though they're aligned with the ship. Control. Steady.
The creak of the ship indicated that your spell was working, but the sudden ripple that broke the surface of the waves causes you to look up in confusion, which quickly shifted to horror. You quickly righted the ship before bursting towards the quickly sinking figure. You never thought you would see him in this way, short of breath, and fear tinting his visage.
He saved yours.
It was your turn to save his.
vi. united
He was expecting a white wall with the beeping of a machine, not your tear stained expression as your breath hitched in your throat at the sight of him opening his eyes again.
"You-"
"You're alive," your whisper interrupted him. And he slowly sits up, his hands clenching into a fist before opening them slowly and he muttered, "What-"
"You fell overboard during the storm," you quietly answered and mumbled, "I couldn't get you back on board, but I took you to the closest island. I healed your wounds to the best of my ability as well."
You leaned away just enough to give him room as he sat up. But you couldn't help but want to stay as close as possible. You had to confirm he was alive, that this wasn't just some illusion or dream created by the storms. But upon seeing him raise his hand to run it through his hair, the glimmer of the bracelet that rested on his wrist shocks you back to reality.
So that was it...
A soft smile overcomes your features and he scowled, "What."
You don't respond, but seeing the confusion on his face causes you to let slip a giggle and he frowned, "What the fuck?"
You gently placed your hand on his wrist, and then mumbled, "It's nothing, really."
He looks at you in disbelief, but instead of taking his hand away from yours, he sighed as he flips his hand over and take yours in his roughly. The callouses from all those years of practicing were rough against your smoother skin, but you relished his warmth and touch. A sigh escapes your lips and you muttered, "I'm back."
You don't look at him directly though. Your gaze still resting on the bracelet that essentially marked you as his. He follows your line of vision, and then rolled his eyes before lifting your hand up with his until you made eye contact with him. You were stunned to see the softness in his gaze, but what shocked you the most was the small smirk on his lips, and he answered, "Welcome home, [F/N]."
You blinked once, then twice, and you glanced back up.
"You have the wrong person." You made a move to go around the abnormally tall red head and he immediately side steps in your direction.
"I'm telling you [F/N]-chan! It's for you!" He wiggled his eyebrows and you raised yours in response, "Oh really?"
"Mhm," he hummed happily. He extended the letter to you again, and you look down at it. Indeed, your name was written neatly on the pale lilac envelope and you sighed, "Okay, but seriously, who?"
"That I can't say."
"Satori."
He flinched at the way you said his name. It wasn't a hiss, nor was there anger, but you dropped the honorifics. And he sighed, "[F/N]-chan, I actually don't know. They left it in my locker. I'm just being the nice friend I am and delivering it to you."
You frowned, "Your shoe box is the very top one on the corner. Mine's not even on the same side as yours."
Tendou shrugged, "Who knows!"
With yet another sigh, you accept the letter and Tendou stares at you intently. You sharply glanced at him and you said, "It's mine right?"
Tendou tilts his head, and then nods eagerly, and you smirked, "Then that means only for my eyes to see. Thanks for the delivery, Sa-to-ri!"
You sung out his syllables as you walked away, slipping the envelope into your uniform pocket, and immediately he pouted and whined, "Not fair!"
In the safety of your dorm room, you place the lilac envelope gently on your desk. Your fingers trace over the neat handwriting of your name. It was unfamiliar, perhaps from someone not in your class. You drum your fingers against your desk, before making up your mind and opening it.
Your finger gently slides underneath the flap and separates them from each other. Upon lifting it, a pale pink folded paper is revealed to you. As you slide it out, something falls out and your eyes widened to see a laminated watercolor painting of a flower.
Your sweetness and purity brings to me a peace of mind and smile to my lips.
I can only hope that this can convey even a portion of how much you mean to me.
- 2/1
"A gardenia..." you closed your eyes momentarily, and find yourself gently admiring flower. It looks so real. You can still see where the water had run off the paper, but you can see how much care and effort was put into the painted flower, for it was cut and laminated so that there were no sharp edges or bumps, and it was shaped like a small tag, as though you could loop twine through the small circle located at the top and dangle it somewhere, to be shown off and proudly displayed.
You turn on your computer, ready to tell Yukio about what happened, but an unread message on the app catches your attention as the name is one you rarely get to see outside of exam seasons.
"Eita-kun?"
Mother Eita: Tendou wants a study session with all the third years, figured I'd invite you. It'll be some time after Valentine's though, in case you were wondering.
Mother Eita: You don't have to come if you don't want to though, it's just that Tendou is probably going to force you, and I just thought this was better.
You blinked and you find a small smile on your lips and you quickly typed back.
Swan Flower: Sure sure! Hehe. (*´▽`*) You're the best Eita-kun~
You feel the small grin now turn into a full out smile and you sighed. It'd be nice if this year's Valentine's goes nicely too.
And so you did, now attached to your book bag was the laminated gardenia, and you gently played with the new charm and smiled as you walked towards the gym. The ever familiar squeaking of shoes on the wooden floors reminded you of the intense games that you've happily witnessed. You pop your head in, and send Coach Washijo a smile.
He waves and his lips turn up into a smile and he asked, "Here to make sure Satori gets to class on time, eh?"
"As always," you chirped. You turned to glance at the boys as they continued practice, none of them actually paying much mind to you as your presence is now a common occurrence to them. Your gaze falls upon the main players on the team, and no matter how many times you watch, you'll probably never get sick of the wonderful way in which they play.
"Stray ball!!!" The shout doesn't take anyone by surprise, but immediately everyone is alert. Your eyes dart about quickly and upon seeing it heading your way, there's a thud as your book bag hits the floor and you neatly position yourself to receive it. The ball ricochets off your arms and back towards the court. "Thanks [L/N]-senpai!"
You give them a small wave and smile and Washijo chuckled, "Your form is very good. They could learn a thing or two from you."
You sheepishly pick up your bag and responded, "Well, I learned from the best." Your gaze immediately goes to Tendou and the coach nods, "Yes, Satori is talented."
Tendou's head perks up and he smiled widely, "Did Coach Washijo just compliment me?!"
"No, your ears malfunctioned, go back to practice," you joked around. Tendou laughed and he said, "Don't wait for me today [F/N]-chan, I have clean up duty for the gym."
"Is that so?" you hummed and then shrugged, "Okay then. Don't be late to class Satori-kun!"
"Yes ma'am!"
Tendou mock salutes you, but he drops it as soon as he sees another volleyball coming his way. The serve was hard and he flinches on impact and then whistled, "Your serves are as strong as ever Semi-Semi!"
The previous setter says nothing, but he nods and Tendou glances over to find him staring out the door where you just walked out. The red head tilted his head, a small frown on his lips. But it was a fleeting moment, and Semi was back at it again, practicing his serves and Tendou shrugged. It must have been his imagination.
You opened your locker, and your eyes widened upon opening the door to it. Multiple letters flutter out and you crouch down, quickly grabbing them. Your eyes merely scan over them, reading your name that's written in various different hand writing styles, but not one stands out to you. You gently place them into your book bag, but as you reach for your shoes, your hand feels yet another letter and you look up into your locker, only to come face to face with a familiar lilac envelope with the same neat handwriting from yesterday.
Surprisingly, you felt something stir within you, perhaps your heart skipped a beat, you weren't sure. But you find yourself smiling at the envelope and you gently place it with your agenda, where you know you won't forget about it like the others. Your mood was significantly lifted, and there was a small but cheerful smile on your lips as you made your way to your classroom.
"Oh? You're not with Tendou-kun today?" You turn to your left and you laughed, "Not today Yukio-chan."
"I would have thought you would be, considering how he's practically glued to you," Yukio teased. The girl glances at your bag, the stack of white envelopes sticking out and she raises an eyebrow, "Looks like the day you hate the most is coming up soon."
"Look, I don't hate it, it's just a tad bit annoying," you sighed, "Everyone turns so materialistic and," you paused, "I know this is inconsiderate of me to say, but I get sick of chocolates getting shoved down my throat."
"Yet you don't mind helping other girls making stuff," Yukio drawled, and you pout. She smirked, "Plus, you even help guys choose the correct flower arrangements and get them sent here from your family's flower shop. What an adorable daughter."
"Stop it," you whined as Yukio teased you relentlessly. She laughed and points a finger at the letters, "So."
"I don't know, I'm just going to read them, but honestly if all of them say 'meet me at x on such day' I'm probably going to run into trouble."
"Just pretend you have a date with someone on the volleyball team."
You rolled your eyes and Yukio shrugged, "I mean, if you say you're going out with one of them, people will leave you alone. A lot of people used to until you and Tendou confirmed that you guys were just childhood friends."
"Okay, but it's true? That's all we are!" You responded, and Yukio shook her head, "Okay, but seriously, either you get a fake date and get rid of people, or you deal with those."
"Can I just pretend I didn't see them?"
"You don't have the heart to do that, [F/N]-chan."
"Ah! Another one!" You gently picked up the laminated flower and smiled. This secret admirer is quite knowledgeable.
You strive for perfection, yet you also lift others with you on your path there.
You have many traits that others can only wish they could have.
And with all the hard work you put in, even your efforts will be repaid.
- 2/8
"A camellia." So.. admiration, huh? You smiled as you followed suit, adding the laminated flower onto your bag. You looked at the two of them side by side and you shook your head fondly. Whoever they are, they've got me curious.
You were about to go off on a daze when you felt your phone vibrate, and a small smile graces your lips.
"Hello?"
"Hey," his voice was soft and you can hear him clear his throat, "Tendou said you've been receiving love letters."
"Oh gods," you laughed, and he's taken aback, and you apologized, "Sorry for laughing, but yeah. I have. Why?"
"Nothing, he just told me and I found it surprising he mentioned it, don't you get them every year?"
"Mm, yeah, but it's because of-" you paused, when you hear knocking on your door and you quickly said, "Ah, I'll be back Eita-kun! Someone's at the door!"
You dropped the phone on the desk, but when you open the door, you find nothing except for a small bunch of acacia blossoms. A gasp escapes your lips and you slowly lean down to pick them up. You glance back and forth, but there was no note, no letter, and no person in sight. A small sigh escapes your lips as you pick up the phone.
"Did something happen?" Semi asked, and a small giggle leaves your lips, "Nope." Nothing at all.
"Another one?" Tendou loomed over your shoulder as you pulled out yet another lilac envelope, completely disregarding the rest. Unable to wait until later today, you gently and carefully open the familiar envelope. By now you've reread the neat handwriting over and over again to have familiarized yourself with it, but you've yet to figure out who it's from.
"'As much as I want to be there for you, I can't. But please know that you are not alone in your endeavors, and many will support you no matter the circumstances. - 2/12'" Tendou read the letter and immediately received a hard slap to his left arm from you. The blush on your cheeks was new to him, but from the way you were clutching the letter close to you made him raise an eyebrow and he smirked, "Ololo?"
"No, Satori, don't you dare start this here."
He glances about, and upon realizing the situation he takes a step back and bows, "After you [F/N]-chan."
You gently pat his head, flattening his normally spiky hair and you sighed, "You're such a pain."
"I know."
"Semi-kun, there's a girl looking for you," one of Semi's classmates called him out. The former setter looks up in surprise and Reon does too. They exchange a glance, and the classmate clarifies, "I believe she's Tendou-kun's friend."
"Tendou's?" Reon parroted, and Semi's eyes widened, "Ah, it must be [F/N]-san."
Your head pops up at the door way and you give him a small smile, "Sorry, did I come at a bad time?"
He attempts to not frantically shake his head and he wills himself to respond with a simple no, but he's not sure if he managed to do so properly. But from the brilliant smile that blossomed on your face, he can tell he didn't. Your step has a spring to it and you asked, "Could you help me study again?"
He blinked, and was about to nod, but he hesitates and muttered, "Volleyball practice ends late."
"That's fine!" you chirped, and then you give him a soft smile, "I can wait. You did the same for me whenever I had practice."
He sighs in relief, and with a grateful smile, he nods, "Okay, every other day like usual?"
"Mhm!" you skip out of the classroom, and send both Reon and Semi a cheerful wave, "Have a good lunch!"
As soon as you were out of sight, but not yet out of mind, Reon turns to Semi with a rather sly grin resembling much of their bright loud red-head and asked, "So, you and [F/N]-chan."
"It's not what you think it is," Semi muttered.
"It's pretty obvious to everyone," Reon commented, and then quickly added, "Except for Tendou, Ushijima and her, of course."
"Oh? No letter?" Tendou asked. You scoffed. There were certainly letters, but not the signature lilac envelope you were looking for. You couldn't help but deflate slightly. It was finally Valentine's day and yet the one letter you were looking forward to the most wasn't there. Tendou noticed and gently patted your head, "It's okay."
"I wanted to meet them," you mumbled the admittance as though you were embarrassed. You sighed and closed your locker after pulling out your shoes, and continued, "They clearly know who I am, and we've obviously talked before. They know of my dreams, my aspirations, and even about my family and friends. And you know I don't go around telling people that kind of stuff about me!"
There was a pout on your lips, and Tendou doesn't say anything. He didn't know what to say. A part of him felt relief, but another part didn't and he shakes his head and asked, "Maybe they're just shy."
He hears you huff and then you shook your head, "Whatever. It was nice while it lasted."
"[F/N]-san." You looked up from the practice problems you were working on and turn, only to find yourself with Semi. You give him a small smile as he sits down in front of you, "Were you waiting long?"
"Nope! Please teach me well again, Eita-kun!" You laughed as he pulls out his notebook. The two of you have been meeting up every other day after his volleyball practices in the dorm study rooms, and he smiles politely at you as you wait.
"You seem more focused today, did something good happen?"
You hum, as though mulling over a response and shook your head. "Not something good, but I guess you can say that I'm relieved I wasn't drowned in flowers and chocolates like I was last year."
"Aren't you popular?"
You rolled your eyes, and you laughed, "Please, not as much as you." You lightly tap the bags at the edge of the table with your foot. "I see how admired you are, Eita-kun."
Semi flushes, and you find yourself heating up as well. Stop it, Heart. Don't you dare go there.
"Ah well," he sheepishly rubs the back of his neck, "I can't refuse them all.. you know?"
"That's kind, but misleading."
"I know, but-"
"You can hurt someone in the process if you're not direct enough, Eita-kun. And even someone as kind as you wouldn't want to do that to someone, right?" you finished, and then the pencil you were holding freezes and you quickly muttered an apology. Ah, what was I thinking saying something like that to him? We're good friends, but-
"Yeah, you're right," he sighed. He props his head against his hand and asked, "So, what happened to your flower boy, I see you only have 13 out of 14."
You tense, as though you were going to recoil, and instead, you deflate, a long sigh escaping your lips, "I didn't get one."
"No?"
"No," you answered, and then you sighed, "Honestly, I really wanted to know who he was. I know this is haughty of me, but I'm really just... done with the typical, 'I like you a lot, please go out with me' kind of thing that most confessions are. I mean, even stories and animations make them like that, and I just want something like, 'Oh I kind of fell in love with my best friend' kind of thing."
"So Tendou?"
Semi almost laughs at the distorted and disgusted expression on your face and you vehemently shook your head, "No, no, no. Not Tendou, he's basically my brother."
You sighed, "I don't know, maybe I got my hopes up thinking Flower Boy was different."
"Is that so...?"
"Yeah," you sighed, and he diverts the topic and asked, "Do you want anything to drink? Eat?"
"A drink would be nice, just water or tea is fine."
He gets up, and you sighed as soon as he exits the room. Your head drops to the table ungracefully and you whined, "Why am I getting so bothered by this, it's just another Valentine's Day."
"Reon!"
"Here," Reon looks over Semi and asked, "You're going to do it just like that?"
"Huh?"
"Like, just wearing your casual clothes?" Reon asked, and Semi laughed. He adjusted the single flower and he sighed, "I think she'll appreciate it, as it is."
"Oh and here, the tea you wanted too," Reon handed it over, and Semi stifles a chuckle and Reon smiled, "Tendou found out, but he said, 'It's better that it's Semi-Semi instead of some stranger!' So go for it."
Semi rolled his eyes, "I wasn't looking for Tendou's permission anyways."
"Sorry I-" Semi pauses upon seeing you asleep on the desk. The watercolor paintings of the flowers were spread out before you and he smiled as he remembered how much time and effort he put into each one. He places the flower on his chair, and gently places the tea on the table before tapping your shoulder. You're startled awake, and you frantically scramble to sit up and you look over at him.
"Oh gods, was I asleep?"
"Yeah, but don't worry, nothing happened," Semi chuckled and your cheeks are tinged pink and he looks down at the flowers, "Thinking of them?"
"Yeah, I can't help it. They seem to know all of the meanings behind each one, and most people don't you know?"
Semi nods and he asked, "What do you think the last flower would have been?"
"Hmm, well, with the way things are progressing... maybe a rose, it's the only one that's missing."
Semi hummed, and then he deftly grabs the rose, and hides it behind his back without you noticing. And he asked, "What would you do if you met them?"
You looked over to him, away from the lovely paintings and you said, "I'd probably thank them, and... hm, I don't know actually. Why are you so curious Eita-kun?"
Semi hesitated, and then sighed, and gently slid over the single red rose, and he muttered, "Uhm."
He glances up, only to see that you're covering your mouth behind your hands and he softly mumbled, "Uh, yeah, I just... Sorry, I was planning on confessing to you after school today, but things happened and-"
"I'm so glad it's you."
Semi looked up in surprise and you laughed, "Gods, I can't believe my luck, I just- I had a feeling it was you."
"How?"
"Your writing," you gently pull up his notebook and then inside your agenda, you pull out the letters you kept with you. "See?"
"Ah," Semi blushed and he mumbled, "I guess it was a bit too-"
"No, I enjoyed it. It was fun, trying to figure it out and everything," you gently picked up the rose and you asked, "So, love at first sight?"
Semi turned away, and he muttered, "Don't tease."
Your giggling makes him glance back and you gently stand up until you're standing next to him. Your hand reaches out for his and he slowly entwines your fingers with his and you smiled, "I like you too, quite a lot."
He sighed, and then he asked, "So, will you be my girlfriend?"
There were no words needed, not when you tucked the rose behind his ear, indicating your answer.
"Oh, [F/N]-chan, did you just finish your club activities?" Yachi called out as she spotted you entering the door way. You give her a bright smile and nod as you make your way towards her.
"Kiyoko-senpai, Hitoka-chan, hello!" you greeted and continued, "Yeah, I just finished, thought I'd swing by since I still heard the sound of squeaking shoes."
Yachi smiled and then leaned forward to whisper, "And not for a certain middle blocker?"
"H-H-Hitoka!" you sputtered and Kiyoko raised an eyebrow and then she made a small 'o' before gracing you with a small smile. You pouted and whined, "Don't tease me like this too, Kiyoko-senpai!"
"I'm sorry, [L/N]-chan," the pretty manager apologized, but the mirth in her eyes doesn't fade away. You sigh and gently touch your cheeks with your hands. My face is probably all pink and flushed. Am I really that obvious?
You risked a glance at Tsukishima as he dully followed through his actions and he happened to make eye contact with you. Almost immediately he smirks and you can feel your irritation level rising and you turned away with a slight huff. You can hear a small chuckle from him despite the distance and you sighed. Honestly, what a hopeless crush.
You sat down Yachi, happily watching over the volleyball team as they finished up the last hour of their practice. Yachi glanced over at you and whispered, "Are you going to do anything tomorrow for Valentine's Day?"
You glanced over at her and then slowly shook your head. She blinked at you in surprise and you gave her a small smile, "My parents signed me up for a mock exam, and it's on that day.. what about you?"
"Mm, not really, we have a practice match at Tokyo."
"Oh really?!" your voice was a bit louder, and there was a hint of excitement and she nodded and you asked, "Where at? Maybe I can come visit after the mock exam!"
"Visit?" Yachi asked, slightly confused, you nodded and explained, "The mock exam is located in Tokyo, so I'll be there! I can come visit you afterwards!"
"I'll-"
"Hey, let's go."
The two of you glance up and Tsukishima stares down at you, his expression as impassive as ever and he teased, "Or do you want to walk alone?"
"Okay, okay!" you quickly got up and said, "I'll see you later Hitoka-chan!"
You followed after the tall blonde, although he could walk much faster than you, he never did. You wave to Yamaguchi who greeted you in return and asked, "How was your day today, [F/N]-san?"
"It was good!" you cheerfully responded and parroted, "How about yours?"
"Isn't it always the same?" Tsukishima cut in. He walks between you and Yamaguchi and you glance over at him and tilted your head, "Is it? I feel like there's always something different happening each day."
Tsukishima rolled his eyes, and mumbled, "You're too optimistic."
You shrugged and responded, "Someone has to cancel out your negativity, Tsukishima-kun!"
The remainder of the walk was mostly just chatter between you and Yamaguchi, it was the norm between the three of you. Friends since middle school, the three of you were practically inseparable. Yamaguchi was about to make his normal turn and then he paused, "Tsukki, you're walking us all the way?"
Tsukishima paused, and you turned to look at him and asked, "Your street is on the opposite side."
"I know," Tsukishima muttered, and then sighed, "I'm just tired."
He turned away, his hand merely going up to signal his good-bye, and you frowned, your eyes narrowing and brows furrowed and you called out, "Walk home safely, Tsukishima-kun!"
You see him pause, and then he glanced back and mouthed a quick thanks. He ducks his head away and a small smile breaks out on your face and Yamaguchi chuckled. How cute of them.
Moon Child has logged on.
Moon Child: [F/N].
Smol Birb has logged on.
Smol Birb: ???
Smol Birb: Yes?
Moon Child: Never mind.
Moon Child has logged off.
Tsukishima leaned back in his chair and sighed. Too much work. He leaned forward and unlocked his phone again. He stared intently at your contact information. He still wasn't sure when this happened, or how it happened. Somewhere during this friendship, the line between just friends, and a little more began to blur, and Tsukishima could no longer differentiate it properly. Has he always been able to freely call you by just your name? Then why is it that you still don't call him by his? Or is it because he never brought it up like you had?
He sighed again, and casually placed his phone on the table, screen facing down and he muttered, "How irritating."
"Good morning!" you greeted as Yachi walked into the classroom, and her eyes widened, "You're here so early."
"Yeah, I had to help out with the student council," you sighed and Yachi shook her head, "And passed out obligatory chocolates?"
She gave you a fond smile as her gaze swept the classroom desks. Each table had a small chocolate heart, unsigned and unnamed, but with you being the only one here, it was pretty obvious. You shoot her a cheeky grin and you reach into your bag before pulling out a specially wrapped chocolate heart and you said, "Here's yours, Hitoka-chan."
From outside the hallway, Tsukishima stares out and Yamaguchi asked, "Tsukki?"
"What?" He turns to his friend and Yamaguchi shook his head, "No, it's nothing." Nothing except that it's obvious.
The blonde looked away, his gaze lingering on you for a little more. It's just another year of obligatory chocolates.
"Let's go, Yamaguchi." The blonde began to walk off and almost as soon as they were out of range, Yachi asked, "Did you make any for Tsukishima-kun?"
You give her a small nod, but the smile on your face was slightly strained, and after a small sigh, it fades away. You looked out the window and mumbled, "I forgot to bring it though."
Yachi gently pats your back reassuringly and she cheerfully gave you a small smile, "It'll be okay."
Come lunch, Yachi was confused to see you walk out of the classroom with a troubled expression. But she hadn't given it more thought after being questioned by Hinata and Kageyama about studying together.
She slowly made her way to class 1-4 in hopes of finding you there, but she finds her assumption wrong when the two boys were eating lunch with each other. Tsukishima catches her gaze and he tilts his head in confusion, causing Yamaguchi to look over with a smile.
"Yachi-san, what are you doing here?" he asked as she made her way in. A shy smile was on her lips and she slowly shook her head, "I thought maybe [F/N]-chan would be here."
Tsukishima's eyes slightly widened, but it was unnoticeable to the two bubbly friends before him and Yamaguchi shook his head, "No, she's not here. Doesn't she normally eat with lunch with you?"
Yachi opens her mouth, about to respond, but the ruckus outside in the hallway catches her attention as the group of boys walked and chattered.
"Hey man, it's okay, maybe she's just playing hard to get, you know?" One of them appeared to be trying to console his other friend who seems to have been rejected, but the other one responded dejectedly, "[L/N]-san wouldn't do that."
At the mention of your name, Yachi noticed how Tsukishima suddenly tensed, his hands that were once casually holding the chopsticks tightened until his knuckles were white. His eyes narrowed, and whatever emotions that were once shown on them were gone and replaced with cold topaz. Someone confessed to [F/N]?
"And besides," the rejected male spoke, albeit a bit softer this time, but still loud enough for the trio in the class to hear, "She said she already likes someone..."
Tsukishima's eyes widened in shock, and he immediately excuses himself as he makes his way to the restroom. What the fuck? Tsukishima was practically storming through the hallways in silent anger as he tried to calm himself down. [F/N] likes someone? Who?
Tsukishima's mood took a turn for the worst throughout the day. Although his game wasn't off for volleyball, he was definitely more focused than usual, but also abnormally tense.
Before the last practice match, Tsukishima takes a quick water break, and tries to calm his thoughts. I shouldn't be this bothered by someone confessing to her... It's not like I have the right to say who she can or can't date. I'm just her good friend anyways. The last thought irritates him, and the water bottle in his hand is crushed. A sigh escapes his lips and he shakes his head. One more practice. And then I can just forget it all when I get home.
But almost as soon as Tsukishima gets home, he opens his phone and is surprised to see a slew of messages from you.
Smol Birb has logged in.
Smol Birb: Tsukishima!
Smol Birb: ;__; Tsukishima, I'm so sad.
Smol Birb: I don't think I did well on the mock exam.
Smol Birb: I know it's a mock exam, but omg what if I don't do well on the actual one?? T__T
Smol Birb: And it was so long.
Smol Birb: I hate itttt
Moon Child has logged in.
Moon Child: how annoying.
Smol Birb has logged in.
Smol Birb: How r u d e
Tsukishima mulled over what to respond, but he doesn't get the chance to when he sees your next text.
Smol Birb: How was practice today?
Smol Birb: I was going to visit, but I would have missed the bus back if I did.
Smol Birb: I hope practice wasn't too bad for you!! x)
Moon Child: It was annoying.
Smol Birb: Annoying? ): That's not good!
Smol Birb: Do you want me to come over and cheer you up? Hehe.
Moon Child: What am I? Your child?
Smol Birb: My best friend! I'll see you later then!
Tsukishima shook his head fondly and then sighed. She's so nosy.
You stepped into the house, it was dark and gloomy and immediately you remembered that your parents were out for the night. You sighed and muttered, "Right."
You sighed, and softly mumbled to yourself, "I'm home."
"Welcome back idiot, don't you check your phone?"
You swung around, surprised to see Tsukishima standing at your doorway and his shit-eating grin was ever present, and he raised an eyebrow at you, "Do you always leave your door open for strangers to come in?"
"I locked the screen gate," you pointed out and frowned, "Besides you have the keys to my house."
You pointed at the keys that dangled from his fingers, and he quickly stuffed them into his pocket and you shook your head, "Sorry, I didn't see your messages."
He nodded and made his way in, closing the door behind him. You stared at his back and you quickly followed after him and asked, "How'd you know I got back?"
"I just did."
"Did you ask Yamaguchi-kun to check up on me?" You teased, but you were surprisingly pleased when you saw him tense slightly and you giggled, "You didn't have to, you know?"
Tsukishima looked away, and you can hear him tut in annoyance and you walked around until he was forced to look at you and you gave him a small smile, "Thank you for checking up on me."
His normally indifferent liquid gold shimmered briefly with emotion and he merely nods before smirking, "If I don't, who would?"
But he almost immediately regrets his words when he sees the flicker of pain on your expression and he immediately bites his lower lip and softly muttered, "I'm your childhood friend, you idiot."
You give him a faint smile and said, "Could you wait here? I'm going to drop off my stuff in my room and change out of my uniform."
As soon as you leave him alone in the living room, he makes himself comfortable on the couch. A long sigh escapes his lips as he relaxes himself completely on the furniture. Why did I come over? What was I hoping for? His eyes fluttered close. Childhood friend... That's all I am.
You fidgeted in your room as you changed into a more casual light pink hoodie and white pajama shorts. You pulled at the hem as you tied your hair up into a messy bun and sighed. Now that he's here, what am I supposed to do? I was planning on just dropping off the cake at his door and then leaving or something.
You bit your lower lip in annoyance and a frustrated whine is heard. I don't know what I'm supposed to do! I didn't think this far! A pout forms on your lips as you make your way back down the stairs. Ah forget it, I'm just going to grab the cake, and give it to him, and I'll just tell him and... What if he rejects me though? I...
Tsukishima had noticed you pause in the hallway once you made your way down the stairs. You were facing the kitchen, not the living room, and your bad habits were showing again. Your fingers were fidgeting with the hem of your hoodie and your bottom lip was being nibbled on lightly. He gets up, but notices that you twitch slightly in his direction upon hearing his footsteps on the wooden floor.
"What's with that face?"
Your hands flew to your face and his eyebrow quirks slightly and he asked, "Well?"
"Sorry, a lot on my mind," your smile was weak and he knows. Heck, you even know that he knows. There is silence for a while and you asked, "Do you... I mean," you sighed, "Can you just wait here?"
Tsukishima blinked, but before he could say anything you rushed into the kitchen and he scoffed, following you in. Your figure was slightly bent over as you looked around for the cake and upon finally finding it, you straighten out. Closing the fridge door behind you, you turn, only to momentarily panic upon seeing Tsukishima standing a little bit away from you.
"I told you-"
"What is that?"
You looked at the cake and then slowly brought it up to level to him and said, "I made you a strawberry shortcake... for Valentine's Day."
"Oh."
He looks at it, then at you, and then he asked, "Don't you already like someone though?"
You looked at him with disbelief and asked, "What?"
He doesn't respond and you set the cake down on the kitchen counter and asked, "Who did you hear that from?"
Tsukishima looked away and your voice lowered, "Did you hear about what happened today?"
He doesn't answer, and the fact that he refused to look at you makes you want to cry a little bit, but you don't, you refuse to. And you take in a shaky breath and explained, "I was confessed to, but I don't like him. I already have someone I like."
Tsukishima flinched, and you quickly grab his hands, knowing he was going to attempt to leave the room, and you rapidly confessed, "I like you."
Your gaze was locked on the warm gold that was filled with doubt, and also hope, and you softly repeated, "I like you, Tsukishima-kun."
You watch as the red that tinges his cheeks spread over and he turns away from you, a hand over his face and he muttered, "Kei."
Your head tilts slightly to one side, and he repeated, "Just call me Kei."
The warm hues of your orbs light up magnificently and immediately you smiled and he gently locks your fingers with his and he responded, "I like you too, idiot."
I'm not quite sure when he'll realize that he's not to blame, but I really hope that one day he knows, that it wasn't his fault.
"Wake up already." The voice was normally laced with sarcasm had a tone of underlying concern in it. Although you wanted nothing more than to respond with the same biting tone you've used every morning with him, for some reason you couldn't. Fear gripped your heart, constricting it, and causing it's palpitations to fall out of its rhythm.
"[F/N], calm down. It's just me."
No sarcasm there either, but you can recognize it now. The familiar intonation of certain vowels and emphasis on a few consonants. Your breathing gradually evened out, and the hand that held your heart released it.
"Ch-Chuuya?" you almost winced at your own voice. You don't remember sounding this weak. It was as though time has been reversed to the day that you first stumbled across the fedora-adorned Mafia member. Your ability just newly recognized, and the terror that swept away almost everyone in Japan causes the familiar feeling of shock and horror to course through your veins.
You sit up in a rush. Blood rushed from all over, as though trying to figure out where to settle to help you coordinate yourself. But it doesn't matter. After all, you couldn't see anyways.
"Oi," Chuuya gently grabs your wrist, and momentarily you think you can actually see him again, but it's not as though anything has changed with him. You're certain that even after Dazai had left, he was still the same, albeit lacking of a partner. You can feel him raise your hand to his cheeks, and a rush of warmth welcomes your touch.
Your right hand gently cups his cheek and he sighed, and you're almost certain he cursed under his breath before he continued, "It's just me. See?"
He muttered yet another string of lovely words, and he corrected himself, "You can tell right?"
A smile graces your lips as you gently rub your thumb against his cheek. It was because it was Chuuya that you relaxed, and he can't help but smile in return upon seeing the peace on your expression. It was a much better image than the one that was filled with screams of horror and pain that night.
You can feel his facial expressions changing, and your left hand gently cups his cheek and you lift the corners of his lips up and then softly murmured, "I don't blame you for what happened that night Chuuya."
He flinched, and attempts to move away, but instead of letting him slip away, your arms move down and you wrap yourself around his neck. You knew it was an awkward position, what with him sitting on a chair and you still on a bed, and definitely taller than him due to the weird positioning.
"Please don't go."
His arms are still at his side, resisting the urge to touch you. But you can feel him shaking ever so slightly, and he muttered, "I broke my promise to you."
"You did your best. It was my eyesight over the lives of half the Mafia, you made the right choice," you whispered against his ear. Your hands traveled south, gently smoothing out his coat as you rubbed soft circles on his back. "It's not your fault."
"I should have-"
You gently knock your forehead against his, causing him to slightly wince, but you don't know that. He looks up at you, and a pang of regret and guilt rushes through him as he stares at the bloodied bandages that covered your beautiful eyes.
Orbs that once held the world and the beauty of life in them. Gone, because of him. He doesn't realize he's crying until he feels your hands on his cheek again. And despite the amount of destruction your hands can normally bring, the gentleness, kindness, and love that exudes your being makes him wrap his arms around you.
No words are spoken between you or him, but you gently rubbed his back before gently resting your head against his beating heart. You didn't have to see it to know, but hearing it is fine.
As long as he was still here by your side, you'd reassure him time and time again. That it was never his fault.
